Today we are pregnant! Thread for those pregnant after miscarriage

[JBrd]

Come and join us for lots of support, handholding and posifrickentivity! (Not sure I spelt that right...)

alb relieved to hear you are reassured.

red that's a bit annoying. Is it something you've always had? If you get the all clear from a scan they'll prob sign you back to MW led care.

Got a gazillion comments at church today - finally look sufficiently like Mr Greedy for them to be safe to ask when the baby is due. Had to endure loads of "aren't you neat?" Or alternatively "wow that's quite a bump" well which is it? Quite often like squiz I got the size comment before the due date one! I suppose I should make the most of it, I know from past experience once I turn up in a month or so with a baby nobody will ask about me ever again

baking iv had that all week aswell from customers at work, I must have popped out in this last week as iv had loads of comments, the strangest one being from a compleatly random person iv never seen before saying "o, ur with child" and then glaring at me for a min before answering my question, but everyone else has been very nice, although one woman commented that she'd just had a baby herself and gave me a look of desperate pitty (I assume she hasn't enjoyed the whole process lol) she clearly felt very bad for me being pregnant, poor woman, I hope she's enjoying it more than she looks!

I'm already worried about being over 20 weeks and not feeling regular movement and it stressing me out. I have an anterior placenta so need to expect it. Have felt a few things this morning low down so reckon he / she is in there!

I'm 18 weeks now alb. And still knackered! I find it all pretty tiring. I didn't 'bloom' at all with ds so perhaps it's not my thing. Plus am still potty training ds and that is VERY testing. I think we are getting there... Just slowly. I should have left it really till he was nearer three but really wanted to give this a good go before baby arrives. He's just struggling with pulling pants down in time, if he's naked he's fine!!! Must persevere, must persevere!!

Hi red I think you can get the mw to check cervix if you are worried. I haven't heard that about d &c but I can see the logic and it hasn't slipped my mind either. I'm seeing the pelvic floor consultant (yes I know!!) on weds that I have to see cos of my tear with ds so am going to ask him about this - assuming he knows. Will feed back.

Alb Phew, what a relief. Some people do say odd things - I have one friend where it's like a mission to convince me I'm naive and my life will be over and I'll look like a tramp although my counts fingers 9 other 'close' friends with young kids seem to be much happier and certainly don't look in the slightest bit trampy!

Fedup I can imagine the frustration with an anterior after what we've all been through. Movement is a huge reassurance. I'm sure all is fine, it's just well padded by the placenta.

I had a weird dream where I had just had the baby and was on a hospital bed laid up with an epidural or something, the MW was a very odd woman who had given her to DH to show everyone without even telling me she was OK. My mum (who had been handed a bucket with the placenta in by the MW, who thought she worked there) realised and came to tell me, shortly followed by DH with baby, as I was worried and buzzing to ask was she in the special care unit. The crazy MW then was convinced my TWIN sister wasn't a blood relative and wouldn't let her visit. Weird. Do hope it's not a premonition of my care! I suppose as birth anxiety goes, it could be worse... the baby was there, and it appeared I was OK. :)

Red the lady that posted that thread is like many of us in terms of her history and anxiety levels - I think it's a genuine question not a statement of anything that is likely to happen! :)

Have been lurking and trying to get through the 1st trimester. All good so far but have been feeling pretty rubbish and exhausted. Early scan next week. Just wanted to check in.

7w+1

red I sympathise with having your heart set on a birth plan and then being told you might not be able to have it, especially when you feel perfectly fine. They have to err on the side of caution but it is very frustrating. Hope you can get the birth you want.

DH didn't come to my booking appointment, I think he would have been bored, but if your DP wants to go then no reason why not.

squiz your spa day sounds fab, and a bargain to boot. You have made me want a Danish pastry now though

penguin13 my symptoms disappeared for a week at 9 weeks, then came back for two weeks before going altogether for the second trimester. So all perfectly normal for them to come and go.

tea I feel for you with your pregnant friends, exactly the same happened to me when I was about 6 weeks pg. I was so happy for my friends but came home and cried my eyes out. Which seemed a bit daft because at least I was pregnant too, but I was sure I was going to lose it again and then have to watch them sailing through their pregnancies. As it turns out I was wrong and it is fab having a ready made maternity social circle! Fx the same happens for you.

hi there buddy! I'm feeling very well thanks, how are you? I don't think this baby is arriving any time soon, but I could be wrong! I'm enjoying my mat leave, today I'll be creating some piles of junk for DH to put in the loft

Morning all,

red hoping you get a speedy referral and can have the birth you want. Is it worth mentioning concerns to the consultant at your next check? Often they can consider doing what you want (after full assessment of course) as a relaxed, happy mum is better for you, baby and your heart.

squiz , spa sounds lovely! enjoy.

Reading comments it never occurred to me that DH should go tobooking in. My DH seems to want to be at everything, and really not sure I want him to listen to the whole torrid details of my 15 previous pregnancies. I guess my reaction ATM is that I probably won't get that far...

Thanks for advise, btw. Whilst still feeling constantly pukey, actual vomiting has reduced, and I have managed to eat a meal yesterday, and keep drinks down. Nothing tastes right though. Weird thing is that I had no sickness (or an fact any other symptoms bar a little heartburn) in any other pregnancy, and in feel like utter poo this time. No more cramps though, and no bleeds yet :)

Does anyone out there know what thrush medicines are safe during pregnancy. First pessaries caused it with 10 mins. I have since gone for the other route, and used natural yoghurt over the weekend, but still struggling.

I have also realised this morning that they didn't give me enough mess until my next scan next week; another job for today. Hoping that all this effort means I get a viable, sticky bean.

Can't believe I sailed through my last pregnancy without thinking about anything, by this stage I had probably started knitting and researching baby products, and my only worry was gaining weight (which I didn't). Oh the innocence of youth!

Happy Monday peeps, have a wobble free day xx

cuppa you can use canestan cream and pessaries (without the applicator) but not the oral tablet. Pharmacist will prob be reluctant to sell it to you since you are pregnant and you ought to check it's ok with the progesterone, so check with GP first.

It never occurred to me that DH would come to booking in. In my area you have to fill in a massive questionnaire before the appointment that asks about partner's family history etc but he'd be bored rigid at the appointment. He drove me to 8 week scan because I was a nervous wreck, and came to 12 and 20 week scans, but for my other appointments and scans I've gone on my own. Booking in is very dull.

Engels every week lowers the risk. 7+1 = up approaching 90% success rate, after 8 weeks it will be over 90%. :) :)

Penguin How satisfying, love junk piling!!

Cuppa Yoghurt and malt vinegar in the bath works. If you need more, maybe ask your GP or MW - it's quite common in pregnancy so I am sure there is something out there to sort it.

Hello All

I think nesting is beginning to kick in. Did quite a lot of cleaning yesterday. Including having a go at the years of airborne grease clinging to the kitchen cupboards that DP just seems blind to (I moved into his house last year, it's not my normally less than perfect cleaning).
Have more energy now in the third trimester which could partly be due to the steroids. Was exhausted the whole way through until now.

Have an appointment with my colitis team this afternoon, and then one with my obstretician tomorrow morning. Bay seemed quite active over the weekend. Slightly quieter this morning, but have felt some rumbles so not worrying too much right now. I'm hoping they might be able to tell me a bit more about how baby is lying and most of the movements are low down.

alb I'm glad you got some movements in the end. It is worrying but MW don't mind you getting checked.

cuppa I had a bad bout of thrush coupled with cystitis just before I got pregnant. The canestan double strength cream was great. Several oral tablets and normal cream didn't work. I carried it everywhere and appkied religiously!

Arrrghh! Bloody horses! I haven't ridden my horse for obvious reasons (I'm up the duff) and have been very careful handling him. This morning something spooked him badly when DH was holding him and he managed to knock me over, send me flying and kick me with his back legs.

I thought DH was going to die of shock. I'm bruised and battered, but when I rang the doctors surgery to get checked out, they fitted me in straight away. Lady doctor was lovely and after she examined me, started to reassure me. Told me that she had 6 MC's before she'd had 2 healthy children and that I would likely be fine.

Of course, am now in flat panic mode, so please could someone slap me with a wet fish? DH is threatening to shoot Dhorse.

Quiet I read (in a book about miscarriage) about women back before terminations were legal that woulddeliberately throw themselves down stone stairs etc' to end the pregnancy is desperation... but it didn't work. The pregnancy was usually discovered as they were carted off for their broken bones. The body is amazing at protecting the baby.
The main cause for fetal death by trauma is sadly the mum's death :( so if you hobbled down the docs, I'm sure all is OK. :)

Over the last few days, movement has become more powerful and distinct for me I think. Sadly, mainly by booting my in the bladder and kidneys so I have to pee. When I'm driving. Little blighter! Still no pattern though.

quiet - ouch, you poor thing how painful for you and worrying. Glad to hear that the doc was reassuring. Hope you feel better soon.

Nerdy, gawd wish I was feeling nesty. Sadly I can't be bothered to do anything other than a quick whizz of the hoover. Trying desperately to get the inclination.

8 weeks yesterday - and exactly a month until S-day.

Quiet that's horrible! I had a big fall at the beginning and I was told they are very protected and unlikely to cause any harm. It makes you panic though, I'm glad you were able to be reassured some-what.

Thanks all, I feel better today and have had my cervix measured at 4.5? apparently good! so that's good.
Also, I am definitely having a boy - there was no hiding that thing.
The 4d scan was amazing, so much detail.
I shall be buying lots of blue at the baby show this weekend.

a boy! Congratulations red what lovely news. Glad to hear your cervix is behaving itself too.

quiet poor you! But in think squiz has put it really well so try to keep yourself as calm as you can :) and def no fish slaps! You've had enough of a beating ;)

Good news red :) glad all was well :)

Hi Mummytono2! this is my fourth pregnancy and I had a son on the second pregnacy. I don't know about d&c.

redandchecker that is such a lot to take in re the mumur. Is this the first time you found out about it? Good luck with the tests.

QuietTiger!!!! I am sorry about your accident. Must have been such a shock for your husband to see you get knocked and kicked. I am glad you got to see a doctor quickly. Hope you are okay.

Thank you

gwlondon no I've always known I've had it since birth and had it with DS but they weren't concerned then

Anyone else had an email like this from someone and felt like you've been kicked in the guts?! ' don't want to put a downer on things, but please don't get too excited... I've been in this position a couple of times and its not ended well.'

AMum WHAAAT? From who? A MN person or a real life person? No, never. Honestly that sounds like cyberbullying, awful!

Someone I know in real life. And she knows my history so knows that I'm all too painfully aware that things don't always work out. But if there was no hope then why would any of us keep trying? And why would consultants give the go ahead to try again? I have enough battles going on my own head and nightmares about what's happened in the past but I want this so badly and really need support. Sorry, I know you're all toughing it out too. It just knocked me that's all.

amum that's awful! naturally when things don't go smoothly you'll always be slightly nervous about a new pregnancy, what you need from friends is hand holding and a positive attitude.
Obviously she's been through some tough times herself but really why can't she just be supportive, sheesh. I'd tell her to bog off I'm actually really angry on your behalf!

AMum I am shocked that someone wrote that to you. It sounds like they think they are being helpful and also like they have their own issues going on but I just feel like it's wholly inappropriate and not supportive. As you say, she knows your history and that you scarcely need reminding that life is not all sunshine and butterflies. There is a place for hope though. You only have to look at the list of thread babies or see the stories of the ladies on this thread to know that people can go through some horrible dark times before going on to have a positive outcome. I really hope that her insensitive comments don't get inside your head too much x