Pregnancy after miscarriage - part 4

[mygirllolipop]

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Nicola, I'm so sorry for what you're going through. My thoughts are with you.

Hi everyone.

Mygirl - I'm doing okay thanks...Exactly 4 weeks to go now until due date. Have got an appointment next week at hospital so am really hoping baby has turned around the right way by then. How is everything with you?

Twocats - I know what you mean about trying to appear interested in work...I hope the next 2 weeks go quickly for you.

Julezboo - Hope you're feeling a bit better now. I don't know what to say regarding the braxton hicks...I've not had that many with this pregnancy but with my last 2 babies I had quite a lot of them - are they hurting at all?

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Mygirl - glad everything is okay with you. Not sure if baby has turned - sometimes I think he/she has but TBH I'm fairly clueless. LOL at burning of incense by left foot.

Hope everyone else is doing okay.

I was not quite sure whether to come back to this thread as I feel very bad about dominating it the last few days with my dramas.

However, I have to give you some surprising news. I did not have the D and C yesterday as they did a scan before starting and found a tiny heartbeat. I was in shock, especially as I continued bleeding (and still do) and was having cramping pains (these have eased off now). The obstetrician took a blood test for HCG, gave me coffee and then drove me home. I was visibly shaking. I don't know what to think, I'm stunned after having prepared for the worst and been conviced this pregnancy was lost, and now we don't know.

The heartbeat was very small, but no bleeding was seen from around the sac or foetus. The foetus is a bit small though. They don't know where the bleeding is coming from. The HCG result showed it has gone up to 35000 now (from 17000 on Monday), which is OK too. I am in a very strange state, feel almost not real and don't know whether to be happy, sad, or what. I can't belive things are going to be alright so I don't know what to think. I have had this sort of thing happen before. Last time at 6 weeks a heartbeat was seen, but it was gone by 7 weeks. And I had the same kind of bleeding. So this may well all just be a delay of the inevitable. This is also why I was not sure whether to come back on this thread, as I may still m/c anyway and be in the same situation, just a few days down the line.

DH cancelled his flight yesterday and is flying in tonight, I wanted him not to miss too much work this week in case I need him to take time off next week. I have taken the whole week off work next week, as sick leave, I can't cope with the uncertainty and concentrating on my job (it's a very demanding and intense job). The doctor thought this was a good idea too. And I am afraid I will suddenly have to disappear to have the D and C after all. At least this way I don't have to keep explaining the changing situation to anyone.

I realise this all sounds rather muddled and I am beginning to sound rather mad. It perhaps does not help that my thyroid levels are far too high and I have to cut down drastically on the thyroid pills. But mainly I am just shocked, anxious and do not know what to feel!

Sorry so long too.

Nicola, what incredible news - I can't imagine how you must be feeling. I will be keeping fingers and toes tightly crossed for you and your tiny bean. Might this be like what Julezboo had - I think I remember she said she had quite a lot of bleeding on the fragmin. Look after yourself, and I'll be thinking of you loads.

Nicola, that is amazing news. I'm so happy for you. I understand that you don't want to get your hopes up just yet but it looks like very good news to me. I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you over the next few weeks. Welcome back to the thread and I really hope you are here to stay.

Nicola, that's fantastic to hear. You don't sound mad at all, just as shocked as anyone would be under the circumstances - and I think that taking the week off work is the best thing you could do, too. Get some good books in and sit on the sofa. I really, really hope this one works out for you. tcx

Nicola thats fantastic news!

Littlefrog is right! I had ALOT of bleeding, started at 5+5 and it was there all of the time, mostly brown spotting, but till 6+6 it was very prominent red bleeding, I had posted on all my boards like you, and said my goodbyes, and felt that people must of thought I was mental LOL I had another red bleed at 8 weeks and again at 10 weeks, tbh honey it was the scariest 13 weeks of my life the first trimester! They told me it was a heamatoma outside the pregnancy sac so unlikely to cause any harm and your levels are awesome!

I understand totally about not getting your hopes up though, I still cant if Im honest, still expecting the worst to happen and I think any lady who has gone through one or more miscarraiges will always feel the same till their baby is in their arms. Im am keeping everything crossed for you honey!!

Anyway enough rambling! Just very quickly my braxton hicks calmed right down once I had a bath, and only have a few a day with no pain so figuring all is normal, feeling bubs move quite alot now, thanks for the messages!

Hope everyone else is ok and those waiting for bubs to turn, i hope bubs does soon!

lots of love

Julie 17+4

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Nicola, sorry haven't written sooner, but have only just read your latest news. What a rollercoaster for you. Nice of your obstetrician to drive you home though! Isn't that outside his job's TOR?

What is the next step? Are there plans to scan you again this week?

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I'm doing ok, bleeding is minimal (small amount brown spotting, tailed off completely yesterday) and am feeling very sick so that may be a good sign. Waiting for some paper work to arrive which my secretary is sending to me so at least I can have something to do at home.

I have a scan on Thursday morning. It's just "wait and see" until then. I have tried to be calm. Nothing I can do to change the outcome, other than what I am already doing.

Hope everyone else has a good and healthy week!

Nicola, I've been thinking of you over the weekend - so glad all still seems to be going well, and (this sounds weird) I'm glad you're feeling sick too! I'm 12 weeks today, and haven't really felt sick at all - after a missed miscarriage you realise a lack of sickness isn't perhaps as enviable a state as most people think.
Hope you keep yourself distracted until Thursday; I have a scan on Friday and were it not for the seven builders currently creating mayhem in the house would be getting fretful already... And term starts on Monday, so lots to prepare for then. Thinking of you lots.

Hiya all

Nicola - so glad it all seems to be going well, i will be thinking of you on thurs!

Littlefrog - good luck for you scan on friday honey.

Im doing ok, feeling pretty normal today for a change, just counting down the days till my 20 week scan on the 5th oct, which seems ages ago. We got the doppler out yesterday and had a little listen which was good.

Hope everyone is ok x x

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Hello everyone,

Nicolal, glad you're at home but keeping busy, and glad you are feeling sick, if you see what I mean - I'll be thinking of you this week.

littlefrog - glad you have some distraction while you're waiting for the scan, but seven builders does seem quite extreme! What are you having done?

Wools - so how's maternity leave? any news on which way up the baby is? I'm trying not to worry about this yet, but given that all of the hiccuping seems to come from just under my ribs, I'm not sure that it's good news...

Not a lot else to report from here; having been feeling pretty good for the last few months, I think the third trimester is finally catching up with me and I am now grumpy, tired and unable to string a sentence together, and also have perpetual heartburn. We've also just had the-room-that-will-be-the-nursery painted, which still seems a little bit like tempting fate, as does buying nappies. But I suppose it has to be done, even though I won't believe this one is alright until - well, probably until it's 18 to be honest.

How's everyone else? Doing well I hope...

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hello,
been meaning to write for ages...Nicola - how's things? Very encouraging news, really really hope this all works out amazingly for you.

I'm 17+3 and feeling baby move lots - lovely. However, I am so breathless, can't sit back or lie on my back without panting, feels like something is constantly pressing on my stomach or lungs - I know it must be the baby growing and putting pressure on various organs but I don't remember having this when pg with ds...it's really uncomfortable. Gets worse as the day goes on too. Any advice?

Other than that, feeling ok, usual tiredness but not so bad. Hope you're all well and relaxed...does anyone have any news?

Mygirl - I know how you feel. I've got insomnia at the moment as well - awful isn't it?

Twocats - I am enjoying not being at work and wish I'd left a couple of weeks ago - I feel I pushed myself to the wire this time. Is it next Friday you leave work? I have an antenatal appointment at the hospital tomorrow so I hope they'll be able to tell me if the baby has turned.

Nicola - I'm glad you're keeping busy and delighted to hear you feel sick - a great sign!!!

Hi all. I very much approciate the way people keep mentioning me and remembering me. I'm in a sort of limbo at the moment. Nothing I can do or even think really until the Thursday scan. The bleeding has tailed off and stopped, but even that, of course, does not reassure me. Nothing will really, I guess!

All I can do is wait. Doing some work and today went on a short tour of the school we are sending my stepdaughter to next year (she is moving from another country to come and live with us), so keeping busy anyway.

Glad to hear things are progressing well for everyone.

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afternoon o company of pregnant insomniacs. Me too, I am now supported by so many cushions and duvets underneath me when I sleep that I look like something fragile being packed for transport - but otherwise I get woken up by my hips and legs aching every hour. Grrrr.

Wools - hope it's good news at your appointment tomorrow. And yes, I finish at the end of next week, which can't come soon enough for me.

Nicola - hope the news is still good at the scan tomorrow, I'll be thinking of you.

Hope everyone else is OK!

Full of cold here today girls and feeling crap, just wanted to pop on and wish nicola luck for tomorrow x x x

Thank you everyone. I am feeling very unlike myself and don't imagine I will sleep well tonight, but it is lovely having all your thoughts and good wishes.