Hovering in the berrycopter: nervous elderberries, sickness reports and backwards scan photos!

[Boomgoestheweasel]

Open to all elderberry grads and anyone who fits the berry criteria: over 30, first trimester(ish) with #1 after trying for a long time, and nervous as hell. Come on in for handholding and nub theory!

Thats great Angel, don't worry about your doc, you can just phone up and ask for a 'booking in' appt with the midwife - they usually do this around 8 weeks ( you prob know this already ). I have mine in 2 weeks - will be 7+3 by then.

tally and quod yay for good scans!

at feeling sick poppy, can you finish a bit early today?? does lemonade help? my fave when feeling sicky.

I am sooo with you on the time going slowely Puppy, almost going in reverse here. Not too many symtoms here - bigger boobs, have started to ache and itch since last night. Been getting twinges which are alternately reassuring and worrying me. When I dont have them I worry things aren't growing and stretching, when I do I think the worst. Mental, mental, mental.

Hope today goes ok boom.

kitty are you worried about not drinking and it being obvious? You could start with one small glass of wine, claim its given you a headache and switch to soft drinks? or can you just not be arsed with lots of people??

How you doing merk?

Thanks everyone, I felt so much better when I say today's test result.

Nice to hear about successful scans. My workmate has just gone off to his twin's 20 week scan (very nervous) so I hope that goes well.

Anyone else get really early symptoms? My boobs are in agony constantly since Saturday. I've got back ache, headaches and I'm really gassy and generally feel unwell :(

I did Angelina, nausea, tiredness and generally feeling a bit funny in the week of BFP. and weird insomnia, though I had been on nights.
I had to start wearing a crop top in bed about a week ago. They do some quite reasonable ones in M&S. makes sleeping much easier.
Be good to yourself and a little self indulgent. I have to eat a little something pretty regularly or I feel sick. I was thinking it had passed but just went about 3 hrs without eating and thought I was going to vom. Muck better after a bacon, cheese and saladcream sandwich, mmm

Evening all!

Well funeral was as nice as I suppose a funeral can be, glad to be home now though and full of homemade chilli courtesy of the husband. Hooray for all the scans/hpt results today, so nice logging on to find so much happy news!

Actually bricking it about tomorrow's scan now. Thank goodness it's an early one. Think I might have a bath and take myself to bed....after I've eaten this entire punnet of grapes that is

boom ah you're so good. You will defo go to heaven a buffing cat is a little blind white bundle of fur who thinks she is the head if the household she prob is

foody puppy the first 3 week wait was the absolute worst wait I've ever had! Now that I've had a scan though I'm a lot less anxious although still counting the days until my 12 week scan!

foody not worried about the alcohol! I've perfected the art of conning people! I simply choose wine coloured drinks and drink them in wine glasses! What I AM worried about is a big Chinese meal I've got to go to on Friday . I'm just not up to eating much in the evenings and they'll wonder what's wrong with me!

quod fab scan news! Can't wait to see some wriggling!

kitty I had to cancel a night out last week as it was spa and drinks. small group, no way could I explain my way out of not doing any of it! had to say I was ill! hav bluffed my way through a couple of other things!

only my sis knows so far!

boom will keep fingers crossed for scan tomorrow. bed sounds like good plan. im heading there myself shortly!

puppy did you decide to book a private one then?

boom hope you're not stressing too much (even though I bet you are). I'm sure it'll be fine

Hey guys
Not sure if I am being pathetic but have just booked a Drs appt for tomorrow. I have been off since Friday with this cold thing, which is getting better but I am exhausted and just fretting constantly and don't think I can face going back to work on Friday.
have been trying really hard to hold it together, but work is really stressful and just not what I need at the moment. can't decide if I just need to get a grip or if I just need some time. I did not go to the drs after mc in may, just the EPU and they had no contact with me afterwards. Thinking now that was a bit shit of them and maybe the dr or MW should have checked in with me? not sure if they usually do.
I went about reflux before my holiday and they didn't mention it then - surely it is in my notes?!?

Sorry all negativity self indulgent crap here. Just realising maybe I do need to talk to someone about it all after all. Such a mess, don't feel like I am allowed to grieve anymore now that I am pg.
Sorry all me, me, me

Foody that's not self indulgent. I'm sure there are a few of us here who can empathise with the tumult of emotions that arise in pg after mc. It can be a very stressful/emotional/draining time. I learned the hard way that the grief process can take longer and take more out of you than you give credit for. It may well be that you need a bit more time and space to process things and hopefully your doc will support you with that. Don't be afraid to ask for a referral to counselling if you think talking would help. I had CBT (NHS) and therapy (privately) to help me get through my MC and resulting anxiety/depression/grief and both helped me a lot. It is a lot to deal with, especially with a new pregnancy - don't feel you have to minimise what you are feeling.

foody agree with what quod said, thankfully I haven't experienced mc but I know how stressful early pregnancy is even without the worry of that experience on top. I feel for u.

kitty we decided to just think positive and wait for the dating scan! when I had my booking appt the midwife put me down as further than I am so hoping it will come round a bit quicker!

foody you are totally entitled to your feelings! I was also abandoned pretty much after mc and it's shit, you don't get to work through anything. I would ask either your mw or gp to refer you for counselling, and maybe an extended sick note in the meantime? Early pg is incredibly tough mentally, and if I remember correctly your mc was quite recent so probably even harder to reconciliate the loss with being pg again. It's hard, do all the me, me, me posting you want - that's why we're here! X

foody I can't remember what you work as but in the nhs we have policies around stress and how work can make life easier. I agree with others that you need to speak with the gp but how about also speaking with your boss? J
Know the gp can sign you off sick for a few days but you want to ensure that you return to a reduced stress work place when you do go back.

Thanks guys
Unfortunately I am a charge nurse on a ward kitty so it is always busy and there are changes going on in the trust meaning my boss relies on us heavily. Its a male dementia ward so quite physically and emotionally challenging.
There would be no way of changing my work without having an impact on the team or without everyone knowing why.
Anyway will see what the doc says this eve. Really don't want to tell work yet, told my manager when I was just 8 weeks last time (has been getting difficult to avoid restraints and other things I should not be doing) and mc a few days later.

Thanks guys, it really does help having you here.

Morning all.

foody just mirroring what the others say. However you are feeling is absolutely fine and you shouldn't feel any pressure to do or feel anything in particular. I had a mmc at 12 weeks and had no follow up from the gp or epu so I think it's up to you to seek support when you need it - which is just what you're doing.

tally I'm so glad you are starting to feel more human and you had a good scan- fantastic news! Keep going, one step at a time.

As for me- no headache today- amazing. I can see, move my head and even smile. I feel like a different person. One day at a time....

Yay thunder thats ace!

Hope you're ok foody, I know exactly how you feel. I'm struggling with work and I've got so long to go before I can relax even a tiny bit. Last MC was 5 weeks and had another at 8 weeks a long time ago so I'm s nervous wreck. Only 3+6 today.

Hugs angelina, its a bloody nightmare isn't it!
Will all be worth it though fx

hi foody. if you feel you need help, maybe do what I did. my first mc I was pretty much abandoned so I phoned up the epu and basically cried down the phone at them until they sent me to a counsellor. doctors were shit, they don't seem to have support networks.

Aw thunder glad you're feeling better!

Two happy waving babies on scan this morning although one of them is an awkward little bugger and wouldn't get into position for the nuchal for about half an hour and the sonographer was vicious, my poor tum! Measurements are fine according to the sonographer so it all looks good, will have to wait for my official risk assessment through the post but feeling ok about it. So I think we might make the announcement this afternoon. EEK.

Thats must have been amazing, so very happy for you. Good luck with announcements, time to share your amazing secret with those that love you x

Hooray boom!!! Fantastic news, massive congratulations and breathhhhheeeee.

And post photos.

Excellent news Boom!

Foody, food for thought: You say you can't take time off without an impact on your team. I totally get that sense of responsibility and it's also what stopped me from taking time off when I really really needed it. My therapist said - 'Why are you putting your colleague's needs above your own needs here?' and I think actually she is right. Sometimes in the long-term it's better to take some absence when it's needed even if it causes an inconvenience if it's going to help you get better in the long run. If you'd broken your leg there'd be no question of you struggling into work - they'd have to cope. It's important to take our MH needs just as seriously.

Yay, congrats boom!!!

Great advice quod!

Congrats boom have fun telling everyone :)