Pregnant after a miscariage, totally terrified, reasurance and hand holding needed.

[StateofConfusion]

I had a mmc in December, went for a scan at almost 14wks and there was no heartbeat, it was utterly heartbreaking.

Had an erpc and got back to ttc after christmas.

Got a BFP on friday, for 5minutes i was so happy my face hurt from smiling then fear hit me straight in the face, and I've felt uneasy since.

I'm achey/dull cramps at the bottom of my stomach/around my previous c-section scars, which i remember from being pregnant with dd, and now I've 2 scars, my youngest is 3.5yo.

However this terrifies me, I've always had horrendous nausea with pregnancy, and this time, its mild, occasional sick feeling.

I know im obsessing and reading into everything, theres no reason for this pregnancy not to be sucessful but i cant relax.

Anyone else been there who can reasure me, or even if you've not and had similar symptoms.

Thanks.

Also my wedding etc rings are tighter than normal. Is that even possible at this stage or am I just a) imagining things or b) being a bloater and blaming pg?

WL as long as it's just your wedding and other rings. Not your (ahem) ring. I guess it is possible though. A good friend put on 12 kg in her first trimester, not that I'm saying you're a bloater... Have you had your blood pressure checked? that can cause swelling (not checking it, silly, it being high). Also today was quite warm. that makes my fingers swell.... I've not got massive yet, but the worry and the MS makes me eat less, so will probably lose not gain in first trimester, did the last 2 pregnancies. Made up for it later though...

I am a bloater. Really. Only 7/8 weeks (depending if I go by my dates or the early scan) but already my jeans feel a bit tight and that's a scary thing because a/ they're not even actually jeans, they're (whisper it) jeggings (ugh, that word) and b/ not just any jeggings, they're M&S jeggings (so cut somewhat on the chubby generous side) and c/ they're size 16. No offence to any size 16s out there, but I was in top shop size 12 skinnies before DS was born, so I'm already feeling a bit more ahem, "curvy".

I'm off to bed now. DH has just put the bins out so has earned his brownie points... enough to get an earful of ranting hormonal missus before he gets to sleep anyway.

Night all.

Well I'm def porky...just got undressed for bed and DH was trying to get me to turn sideways so even mr unobservant has noticed the portliness! I haven't actually put on any weight just sticky out belly.
bonzo tmi warning...the [not wedding] ring was ruined by 3rd degree tear dc1 gave me!

I feel firmer, I'm on the chunky side so it wouldn't notice but I feel a bump appearing, and jeesus my norks are huge! Gone from c to dd, and now that's snug.

Glad I'm not the only one too scared to get 'intimate' ah sod it, shag.

Yes, he re-arranged the lounge, it looks nice, and he did go get my crackerbread, so all is forgiven! :)

Definatly starting to feel pregnant!

And there is a 'pull' when removing my engagement ring that I didn't get before.

no state you're def not the only one! Tbh with both my other pgs there was very little boudoir action as we'd been trying so bloody hard to get pg we were both quite glad of the rest!

I was cautious when pg with ds, less so with dd, then last time totally relaxed and look what happened so I'm being super careful this time.

Feel very pregnant today ie, like shit.

Scan went well I am 13 weeks and 3 days so due 12.11.12 really happy we are 4days further on than we thought which helps ease my mind a bit :)
Would have been a fab afternoon if dh hadn't started an argument about the downs. screening owell that is life I guess xx

Glad scan was good, swanseamum :) What's your dh's gripe about the downs screening?

Sorry to hear you're feeling shit, stateof, but glad it's shit in a good way Hope everyone else is feeling shit in a good way too!

Baby has moved back to the front again now so lots of lovely movements again. Just a week to go to the 20 week scan. Just. Can. Not. Wait! I am suddenly very huge too, I look more like your standard 7 month pregnant woman than 19 weeks, but I don't care, I'm enjoying it more every day.

Great news everyone. Swansea and wellies particularly good work. I've been feeling a bit shit and very tired which i am taking as a good sign but I can't help but feel that if anything gies wrong I'll feel worse because of it. Sigh.
Interested to hear more about downs test issues. X

I'm enjoying feeling shit, I really am

Glad the scan went well swansea sorry you and your dp fell out, feel free to vent here, this is what this thread is for support for all aspects of our growing beans xxx

I'm really dizzy, anyone else? And really bunged up nose! Xx

I've been a bit bunged up, I know I had lots of nasal issues with dc1 I think.
I am finding it really helpful pouring out some of my anguish here rather than heaping it all on dh. We're keeping pg a secret for now so also can't talk to those I would normally.( I may crack though and tell one particular friend when I see her next). Hearing everyone's positive milestones is helping loads too. Big fat thanks everyone! . X

I told my friend today WL I'm spending time with her saturday and I have dates on the calendar in the kitchen since she's had fertility issues I was too pathetic to tell her face to face and texted her, she was lovely though :)

I don't know what I'd do without mumsnet! Probably quietly freak out and worry over nothing alone!

I can so relate to this thread. I had mmc in June (3rd pregnancy, 1st lost, 2nd DS now 5), had felt something was not right at 8 weeks and went to my doctors, saw the practice nurse who pooed pooed me and sent me away. Started bleeding at 11 weeks (on holiday) and went for a scan to find no heartbeat, foetal demise probably around the time I had felt something was wrong, had ERPC at 11wks 4 (on holiday).

DH and I were absolutely devastated and too frightened to ttc for a long time. We decided afer Christmas that we would have one last attempt, started ttc in Jan, got a BFP on 24th April, I think I'm now almost 7 weeks, I have an early scan booked on Monday and am terrified.

I'm in need of handholding and hugs please!

Come join us . Good luck for Monday, will be thinking if you. Let us know how you get on.

Welcome cupcakes will be thinking of you monday.

I'm 9wks today and feeling pregnant so I'm happy about that.

Me and dp even dared buy something, its a twilight bug, a ladybird that projects constellations on the ceiling.

Cupcake you are so in the right place. Welcome. And (whisper it, probably the only place you can hear it without wincing) congratulations.

It's a strange position we find ourselves in, so happy to have gorgeous children, so sad that we lost a pregnancy and so lucky to have the chance again... but, oh but. There are days when it's hard and you can't tell anyone why. This is what we're for. A good place to moan on the bad days, and celebrate on the good ones (congratulations by the way Swansea that's wonderful news!).

Thank you WL, state & noclue for making me welcome, and for the hugs.

I've been reading the thread for a couple of days, so sad for all your losses, and so pleased for you all to be pg again, and such a sense of relief that others are experiencing something similar (that sounds horrible but I hope you will understand where I am coming from?).

I've told close friends about this pregnancy as with #1 we didn't tell anyone except family and it was such a horrific time, and I found it really hard to talk about it with anyone because no-one had even known I was pregnant, so last time and this time I've taken the approach that whether I tell people or not will make no difference to the outcome but having some good friends who know will give me extra support now and if things do go wrong.

Like you guys I alternate between feeling pregnant and panicking that it will all go wrong, I have been doing pregnancy tests virtually every day (all positive so far), today I even stooped so low as to test my urine in the toilet bowl my logic being that if a test was positive with that much dilution then I must be really pregnant! It was positive and quite quickly too.

My first two pregnancies, apart from extreme tiredness, I felt absolutely fine until somewhere between week 7 and 8, and then ms hit me like a runaway truck and did not leave me for 5 or 6 weeks. Last time I just felt occasionally nauseous, which worried me, so this time I want to feel sick, currently just tender boobs especially when I take my bra off, and today when ds lent on one of them (was pleased that it hurt!!!)

I'm trying to be excited and look forward to having another baby - yay for you state for buying the ladybird bug, but it is hard to be positive after such heartache :(.

Have any of you ladies had an early (reassurance) scan? I'm desperate to know that I do have a live bean in my tummy, but scared that there will be nothing there again - if I won the lottery tomorrow I think I would have a private scan done every day!

Big hugs to you and sending positive vibes x

Hi cupcake. Lovely and sad that you're joining us, you know what I mean.

Having a quiet freak out here. Occasional mild cramps when I lie down, but very mild. Nausea more off than on. Not that tired. Feeling pretty grumpy though. Is that pg hormones or anxiety? DS threw a wooden block at me and got me on the forehead. Hard. I went absolutely ape at him. He was so upset, sobbing, heaving shoulders, puppy dog eyes, crying too much to talk. I feel terrible, but on the other hand he has been getting more and more boisterous and he's old enough to know its not on. Still for him though.

Hi bonzo I have a crisis over my symptoms most days, are they symptoms or just stuff I would feel anyway that I am now attributing to pg symptoms? It's a nightmare isn't it?!

hi Bonzo, thank you for your welcome, big [hug ]to you this morning. I think the grumpiness is probably caused by anxiety and exacerbated by pg hormones, all totally understandable. Your Ds will be ok, they are mighty tough little creatures.

I'm guessing you and I must be at a very close stage at the moment? (I think I'm 6.5 today), I've had the odd niggly pain too - like you I'm not sure if it's anxiety more than anything. I had major pains all over my tummy the other day and then realised that it was trapped wind (probably caused by anxiety!). I try to think 'would these pains or feelings be causing me concern if I wasn't pregnant?' At around week 4 I had real crampy pains and some bleeding which was really worrying, but from the google research I did I think it's hormonal and quite normal to feel period type pains, backache etc in first trimester. Trouble is, once you've lost one, everything seems like a possible mc :(.

I'm getting more and more nervous about my scan on Monday in case it is bad news, wish I could turn that into excitement in case it is good news!

When did you experience ms with your previous pgs? I'm not expecting it until next week or even the week after, but would welcome it! And everyone keeps telling me every pg is different.

Hi WL, it sounds like we are all spending our days quietly freaking out, so glad there are peeps to share it with on here.

Is anyone else having really weird vivid dreams? The other night I did a marathon (in Spain) with one of the teachers at Ds's school ????!!!

Today I am going to try to think of the best that can happen, not the worst! Hope you can all join me in my crusade :o!

bonzo 7-8wks I had a lot of aches and cramps, my mw said unless they are painfull, which made me think no they're uncomfortable but not OMG OWWWW, then its perfectly normal especially in subsequent pregnancys and following miscariages.

mrscupcake I have really vivid dreams, usually baby orientated! And one very X rated one. but they're so real!

Anyone else having dizzyness/shakes? I do every day, today I drank some lucozade and had a couple of biscuits and it really helped but its worrying dp x

ffs. I just wrote a massive War and Peace post and bloody thing crashed! If it happens again I will flip. So going to do in multiples for damage limitation purposes.

WL, exactly. One forgets that the normal stuff goes on despite being pg.