Due in Oct 2012 - part 4!

[Angelico]

Back for more...!

mmmmmmm, Wotsits!!!!! Mickey, I blame you for the 6 pack of these that I'm just off to buy! I got through quite a lot of cheese McCoys last week, perhaps a salty cheesy craving thing is going on - anyone else finding this?

Squid, well done, time off sounds lie it's just what the (sensible, head-screwed on, non-admin type) doctor ordered.

Well, I've spent the last 3 days doing "Aspirant Senior Leaders" training - basically an opportunity for year leaders who are interested in becoming deputies, where you are matched to a volunteer deputy from another school and you follow them around like a sheep and find out what their job entails. The verdict? Bring it on! Ah, but there's the small problem of the year's maternity leave, lol. What bad timing this has all been. I'd love to be a deputy - no reports to write, no parents evenings, managing my own time, no more classroom preparation - feel like after 10 years in the classroom I have really done my time and am ready to move on to the next challenge, and year leadership is great but it's a massive juggling act (good preparation for parenthood?) and still entails all the draggy bits of classroom teaching like reports and parents evenings. I'm delighted to be the proud owner of a wriggly Biff (our name for the bean, it's complicated ) who will be out in the world in 6 months (eek) but damn, the timing sucks!

And we randomly have internet back, hurray. I have got so much work done in the evenings and last weekend without the distraction of the online world though.

Not posted for a few days as I've been feeling sick as a dog (still).

Very worried. Came home from work yesterday and started bleeding. It was a steady flow for about 3-4 minutes and then gradually petered out. I spoke to my community midwife last night and she told me to self-refer to the hospital this morning. I called them, and the midwife there questioned me in detail about exactly what happened and then said to stay at home.

There has been no further bleeding and I feel as sick and pregnant as I did before, but am still worried there could be something wrong inside. Without a check-up, I'm still in the dark :(

Sedgers, poor you, that doesn't sound very helpful :(. Did the midwife tell you when to get in touch again, or why she wasn't concerned? Lots of people on this forum will tell you that they have had or know people who have had bleeding throughout, with no problems at all and no bad effects, but I know that it must still be massively worrying. Sending you a hug.

Sorry to hear about your worry Sedgers. So is that all your midwife said then? She didn't suggest any kind of check up? Plenty of people experience bleeding, and it's most likely to be something completely normal, but I think you need to insist on someone properly investigating or you'll just worry. If your midwife won't do anything, do you have the number for an emergency gyno unit?

Thank-you LondonMrsS. I have just called the hospital again and was more forceful this time. I am going to have a quick check-up. Fingers crossed all ok!

Mickey - you aren't the only one, I wake up at 4 am starving! Dreaming of a fry up!

Sadly I am not I a happy place today, house move is going horribly, nobody has offered to help so am packing 3 bed hse by myself while hubby works! Tried cleaning the filthy new house yesterday and landed up in bed early with exhaustion. Luckily cleaner has gone there today so that helps! We saw a prospective school for Ds1 but the head teacher was so rude I walked out crying without even seeing the school. What a b-itch.

Seeing consultant tomorrow and praying she says yes to Elcs.

Wow, sorry self indulgent self pitying post. Going to raid the fridge maybe that will make me feel better!

Just catching up on what you've been through squid - absolutely dreadful treatment. Very glad to hear you are going to your union, and I totally agree with what Zoeplankton 's husband said. Record any further conversations and get a lawyer if necessary (see what your union says).

DO NOT FEEL IN ANYWAY WAY BAD OR ASHAMED. What they are doing to you is BULLYING. Their inappropriate, bullying behaviour is taking away your sense of power over the situation. Don't let them do that to you. Your union is going to be able to help you. And, I 100% guarantee your supervisors/so-called-colleagues are going to have the bloody riot act read to them by people much higher in the foodchain very shortly for what they've done to you. Please take time in the next few days to look after yourself.

This is coming from my former litigation lawyer/current media/marketing role angle, but you do have the power to really put the frighteners on them in another way. If they try playing hardball, threaten to talk to the media (anonymously, ie not outing your identity). This is really really effective in my experience.

PS squid given that these are hospital admin monkeys who are bullying you and telling you such bollocks, they would absolutely shit their pants at the thought of the media poking their noses around (and their fat pay packets being at risk).

A pox on their houses!!

Keep us updated, we're all rooting for you!

Ok I just got home after:

• throwing up ALL OVER myself, my shoes and in my bag, on the bus home
• having to get off about 7 stops too early, to throw up some more in someone's garden
• hail a taxi in the lashing rain
• DH not answering his phone to come get me WHAT THE FUCK IS HIS PROBLEM DOESN'T HE KNOW I'M PREGNANT
• find an ATM on the way home in taxi, because I had no cash on me

Has anyone else had sudden recurring morning sickness?!?!

I also blame the stupid fucking bus driver for driving too fast in the lashing rain through tiny estate streets.

13+5. Harrumph.

Sorry.

Squid - definitely go to bma and hopefully they will be useful.....
I am probably now going to tell you things you already know but it doesn't hurt to say them again
Do NOT accept a paycut. You have the right to have your job modified to make it safe for you whilst you are pregnant and not to have your pay changed because of that. That explicitly includes your banding supplement even if you do no on call whatsoever. Occ health should be getting the final say here, have you let them know what's been said to you? If not please do, they will want to know.
Do NOT listen to stories about what other doctors (or anyone else for that matter) have done at work whilst pregnant. Yes, some people have worked a full on call rota doing 120 hrs / week till 42 weeks pregnant (I'm exaggerating but it can feel like that once people start telling you stuff). Two things to remember. It wasn't necessarily a good idea for them to do that. Their pregnancy will have been different to yours. Every pregnancy is different and that means different people can and should do different things. So no one other than those people looking after you and listening to you can comment on what you can and can't do.
Basically tell them to get stuffed!

I am knackered today. I'm a GP so do get to sit down lots but have worked till 7.30 every night this week and just want to go to sleep now. Time for tea, telly and bed methinks!

Hi all haven't been on for an age and need to catch up properly but just have to say send hugs to squid and you zara!!!
I have no legal knowledge whatsoever but if it's making you feel that bad then it's WRONG. Know how you feel about not being able to think about the bean though. I'm constantly being reminded by people not to do stuff - it's easy to forget that you're growing another human and that is amazing and we SHOULD be treated differently if we need to be.
Had to ask for a seat on the tube this morning after waiting in the rain for 20 mins and arguing with a guy who arrived last minute and stood in front of me Lovely guy stood up before I even finished explaining and I felt guilty all the way. If even thanked ME when I asked if he wanted his seat back when I got off... I almost cried! There ARE considerate people in the world.

ugh what a day!!

Have finally realised how IMPATIENT preg has made me, managed to let my temper get the better of me with the kids I work with this afternoon and really shouted at a few of them but honestly! If I had spoke to adults the way kids do nowadays, a clip round the ear wouldnt have been all I got!( and before anyone phones Childline, no physical punishment was used, I just lost my voice from telling them off) Its disgusting when they are standing there saying to your face "You cant tell us what to do, no-one can, and theres no point telling our mums about this coz they wont care either" THIS IS FROM 7 YR OLDS!! ARRRGGGHHH.

Wasnt until I got home I began to worry about the stress this has caused baby, as I've actually been really stressed ourt in general over the past month, snapping at anyone and anything, and freaking out over the tiniest things. I'm putting it down to the stress of not actually knowing what the hell is going on inside me, daily worrying if baby is ok and counting down the days til my scan. How can health professionals expect us to relax, when we have to wait weeks on end to have a pregnancy confirmed, see the baby for real, and know everything is ok?? The first 3 months is more stressful than ANYTHING i've ever been through! I wont be satisfied til I can feel baby move until baby is in my arms and thats the end of it. Will try and calm down from now on, but theres still 4 days til my scan, apart from feeling stressed, I honestly dont feel pregnant at all, even my "bump" has gone down, WHAT IS GOING ON??!!! Sorry for the freaky, hormonal woman over here, I'm just going to go and sit in a dark corner with an imaginary bottle of booze :(

Hey peeps, just a quickie here (she says, then writes War and Peace...)

Haggis how did you get on today? Hope itching was nothing to worry about and you got good shit for the hayfever :o

Yomping know the feeling re doppler, think I would freak more about not hearing anything!

Lisbeth sorry to hear about work stuff, God it's all going on isn't it?! You'd think we didn't need any more babies or something - why are women shafted all the time for being pregnant? Don't let them trample you! x

CWest glad cramps eased off, think they are just part and parcel of the whole thing

London 7 times in one night!!!

Squid - yay for your lovely DP and your lovely GP! Try and relax for a few days and build your reserves back up, pregnancy is stressful enough without bloody penpushers sucking the life out of you! And don't rule out the media route if they are twats - the Daily Wail would love a sniff around a story like this... just sayin'! x Good advice from all and Smiley seems to know the ropes! :o

Mickey - hunger yes! Starving tonight, ended up having fish supper as we both got home ravenous

Sedgers hope everything is okay, fingers crossed for you! x

Giggle hug for the house move - most stressful thing in universe without being pregnant. And shop the headbiatch to the LEA!

Zara sympathy of the day for the sickness! That sucks, you poor thing :( Buses are gross at times :(

nenehooo hurrah for nice peeps and shove the turd in front of tube next time... you can always plead hormones...

CWest - those kids sound a positive delight. Must be something in the air as a kid went boogaloo today for me too, always a pleasure He did apologise after at least...

Took a bump photo, will upload tomorrow if I can find the lead :) I look mahoosive!!! Night lovelies and sorry for the essay (I need to start writing next book instead of skiving, then wouldn't have time to write these epics :o)

Still a bit furious for squid and I have something to say about exhaustion.

I have some pretty extreme experience with exhaustion following an unexpected death (my sister, 2005). It was three weeks between when she was injured and when she died, so, I experienced some pretty extreme exhaustion, during and after that time.

But if you had asked me, I would have said I was, if not fine, at least competent.

I wasn't. I just didn't have a mental image of what exhausted looked like outside of, I don't know, fainting or something. And I wasn't fainting, so I must have been ok enough to keep going, right?

Wrong.

squid, it seems likely to me given your circumstance and what you've written that you are exhausted now. if this is true, then you are probably going to be ill-placed to assess yourself as exhausted. Just because you're standing and talking doesn't mean you're ok. If your loved ones tell you you're not looking great, it's not because they don't understand - they do, better than you do. So listen to them.

If your boyfriend says you're not right to go back to work on Monday, then you're not. So ask him.

There's no 'well that's it I'm definitely exhausted now' signal you're going to get. This is it, you're there now. Stay home. Watch loose women. Eat a muffin. Don't do any filing or call the electrician, just stop.

And good on you for calling the union - bravo.

...and what a great set of advice the rest of you have been providing. Proud to be on your forum.

Sorry about your sis Zoe :( And good advice x

Sending , , or (or all 4 if it floats your boat!) to everyone who needs it, it sounds like things have caught up with so many people and it's making me sad sitting here today reading about people's recent bad experiences . Difficult children at work, horrible bus and tube journeys, problems needing union involvement, bad house moves, worrying symptoms (Sedgers, any news?) - sometimes it feels like the world is a bad place and not on our side. I'm hoping putting a happy post on here (I know, unusual for me, right??? ), might be a good omen and might guarantee nicer days for everyone going through stress.

My happy post is that I haven't felt like sex for ages, feels like my body has a different purpose now and feeling good isn't one of the things it's there for. Pregnancy is making me feel weird. Anyway, this has been bothering me, and we had some time last night (TMI?) and DH was very patient (definitely TMI!!!) and Thunderbirds were go and it was bloody lovely. And then I think I may have felt the bean move! (bit embarrassed about the thing that caused it to move, hope it's not emotionally scarred for life ).

So despite a grotty email from someone at work (already, and it's not even 7am), I feel good today and wanted to share a bit of it around. I also want to take everybody to the pub (tonight, not right now) and buy you all a drink and tell you all that it will be OK in the end, it always is, it's just a bit shitty now. But a virtual (or virtual if it's too early for virtual ) will have to do.

Be well, be happy, have a better day those that so badly need it.

Apparently orgasms are good for strengthening your uterus in prep for labour, so I've made it clear that it's necessary in our house!

In other news, today's pee-report is that I only went twice last night. Much better!

Zoe, very true words from you- and what a lovely network of support we have built up here!

Phew, all seems OK for now. Still don't know the reason for the bleeding. Listened to the little one's heart beat at the hospital which was comforting. Resting up today. Thank-you for all the best wishes.

Squid, I can't believe what you're having to go through. Loose Women and feet up all the way. Hope you can get things sorted and get some much needed time off.

Zara that's awful. Do you think you might have a stomach bug? That sounds ferocious! Hope you feel better soon.

Yomping Thank-you for your very positive message. Have a feeling today is gong to be a good day

Zoe I'm so sorry to hear about your sister. That sounds absolutely horrific

Crikey Zara you poor thing! I hope it's settled down now? That must've been horrible, hope you're ok.

Squid hope you're getting good rest. And I hope you're able to see it as time you need off, and not feel in any way guilty - you have nothing to feel guilty about. If you read your post back and imagined that someone else wrote it I'm sure you'd be horrified for them.

Sedgers glad everything seems to be ok! What a relief.

My childminder is off for this week and next so I'm having to take some holiday this week. It involves lots of time with DS, which is lovely....but if I do too many consecutive days with him alone I go a bit mad. I do like the change of scene that work offers (only 2 days/week, perfect for me). I feel a bit bad saying that, but the demands of a small, more or less non-verbal, irrational human being can get very wearing! I do love him madly of course... My Dad is looking after him next week (he doesn't live in the country so is just flying in for 2 days). I'm quite nervous about it, as DS doesn't know my Dad that well - we don't see him that often. I don't have any other options though, other than taking more holiday myself. My Dad's really keen too, so...fingers crossed...

Still on the search for an elusive dress for weddings! I tried a couple on at JoJoMaman and they looked horrendous on me. At 16wks I still have absolutely no evidence of a bump though so I'm thinking I'm going to try non-maternity. Anyone seen any nice dresses on the highstreet? I hate shopping at the best of times and have very little time to do it with a toddler who wants to get out of his buggy and rampage around the shop.

Angelico thanks for asking!
Had midwife yesterday who told me to talk to the consultant this morning about itching (I was booked into see him anyway). Everything else at midwife's appointment was good - bloods were all ok, and she heard the heartbeat straight away!
Had consultant this morning -he gave me a prescription for piriton for the itching/hatfever reccomended emoliant(sp?) cream with menthol as well and also took some bloods to check my liver function (he doesn't thik it's that though as it's very unusual to get before 30 weeks) So I'm hopeful the piriton does the job. He also wasn't worried about the two hysteroscopies I had last year - I was concerned that their might be damage to my cervix, but apparently it would only have been dialted less than a cm for the procedures so there's no risk of any weakness.

Yomping glad you had a lovely time last night!

Does anyone else get really bad pains down the sides of their stomach when they orgasm? I was in agony for a couple of minutes afterwards which has really put me off - it also didn't help that I started this mad giggling/crying thing for no reason at all that I couldn't stop! So feeling very bad for DH at the moment as he's hardly getting any (and if I'm honest I still don't really feel like it)
It was understandable in 1st trimester because of tiredness and sickness, but I thought I was supposed to be gagging for it now....

Thanks Dame, Angelico. Yes it was a dreadful time. But here I am, still kicking, still working, and hopefully still fun... when I'm not being super-bossy on forums that is! ;)

I heartily approve of moving the convo on towards sex! Yay, sex! Haggis no probs for me, yet... I have to say, my body's whole response to sex seems to be changing. Not better or worse, but definitely different! (I have had one or two absolutely cracking climaxes recently, it must be said. Unexpected bonuses, eh?)

And now, to get us all smiling again after a very hard run for a lot of ladies, here is a video of a farting baby: www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-z05l12WX4

Oh and also one time I was a whistleblower. So, not really a stranger to how much of a body-blow workplace stress can be! That stuff can really take over your life! Everyone take care at work and eat lots of biscuits.

Hey ladies :o Clearly only one thing on everyone's mind today...! Yay Yomping glad you got to do the sex with DH :o Everyone seems to be going for it big style but although the mood is back in full force I'm too scared after the wee bit of bleeding at start of week. Going to give it another few days and then thunderbirds will indeed be go (or should that be 'ohhhhhh!' sorry couldn't resist :o)

London I had to get up last night to pee and was disgusted at bladder, would not have been talking to mine if it happened more than once

Sedgers so pleased everything was okay! Was getting a bit worried about you - hurrah for the beans! x

Dame can completely understand how looking after tiny child could make anyone a bit mental. Hopefully when your dad arrives it will give you a break! And on dress front think I said before that New Look have a few, I got a nice purple one which is quite smart.

Haggis glad you're getting sorted with the hayfever stuff and bravo for consultant checking. Friend in work didn't get blood tests for months, kept telling MWs etc and they kept saying, "Oh it's too early for that," so by time they checked her liver results were mental!

Had MW appt today, all is grand, pee, blood pressure etc. Took a minute to find heartbeat, did hear the placenta first - who knew you could hear a placenta?! Going to scarf down some food and dash - have my wee evening class which I love. It was full but managed to wangle a place - but of course I am shattered tonight and feel like staying home But going to do it, dammit!

X-posted. Gah Zoe if only I had time to watch funny baby videos now, will have to wait till later! :o