40+ mums to be

[littleredmonkey]

Hi
I am 43 and expecting my first and these next several months are going to be a challenge so hoping to meet others in the same situation.
I can believe I have a baby growing in my dusty cobweb ridden womb. It has taken me 3 weeks to get my head around the whole thing and it is still worried about the future and being able to cope. My partner is fab and great helping me with the ups and downs of baby hormones. Nothing beats hot sweats, night panics and freeze in the middle of tescos wondering our we doing the right thing. I feel better this week and got my head around things .
Any ladies who also need support or just to have a good moan every now and again. xx
Ps thinking about having a toilet built next to my bed to save time going to the loo quite a bit in the evenings!!

bytheseaside - Yes I want nothing but carbs and more carbs. i am trying to be good and have not bought any biscuits or bread this week from tesco. So desperate at lunch time had two massive spoons of peanut butter straight from the jar. I managed the gym last night but had a crap sleep last night and day off today. I have had to go up a size of trousers at work already. I am not going any where near my scales . Done the house top to toes but been like a zombie all day.

Zimbomanan- Hope your scan goes fab Thursday

My scan is tomorrow and I am worried about what they will say. I am positive person but the seeds of doubt creep in . Stupid brain. I feel the need for a mcflurry coming on to settle my nerves. Apple pie for seconds just in case !!!!!!

Tennerlady sorry that you're having such an awful time of things - I hope that you're able to find some space to 'breathe'.

Hi lady's thanks for all ur comments spoke to friend today she made jokes that she still got hair after first lot of chemo so if she can find it in her self to keep up beat I have too for her and not let things get to me regarding work I havnt been sudpendered as they don't see me as a financial risk to company and they know I have never had anything against me or made error before worked their 18yrs but it's the long drawn out process iv not heard a thing about it since was told 2 weeks ago I'm off now for a week so just not going to think about it. Spoke to hb before and asked if he was coming to scan with me next weds and he said he will meet me there so at least he coming x thank you all for your support It really does help x x x

tennerlady hope you have a good break and can find some relief from your worries x

Good luck littleedmonkey let us know how you get on, will be sending you virtual good vibes.

I had my last scan at the RMC yesterday and still looking all ok. They have discharged me to normal ANC now, which is a big milestone for me. NT scan next Wednesday. Starting to feel there may be an actual baby at the end of this. Blimey. As you can probably tell I am no stranger to a scan but yesterday I experienced an embarrassing first. The view of the bean was obscured by a whole load of trapped wind. Poor baby was laying in a fog of farts. I did have the decency to feel a tad ashamed but also had a big chuckle. Poor baby, maybe it's it's own farts? In which case def a boy! Hope you are all feeling Ok. . I felt my age yesterday and had to miss the match I was going to and come home and go to bed early. Onwards and upwards x

Hello everyone, lets just keep on staying positive, we have these LO inside us and all the good feelings we have will (hopefully) transfered to them so that they come out very chilled out and give us wonderful moments always... We all wanted to have them so lets try to give them the best we can.
Tenner, your friend is amazing and I am sure you will be by her side, don't worry for work, you have not been suspended so the investigation will go nowhere
Midgetm: that was funny and made me smile, I wish I could see your face when you had your laugh !
LRM let us know how it goes today

On my side, I seem to be living in 2 worlds or 3.
OH resigned 10 days ago, he is on gardening leave for 6 weeks so has been dealing with house chores, cooking, DS1, nursery.... the only thing I have to deal with is work ! how great is that ? that will not last forever but it is good to have a little break :)
Plans to go to Italy went to the bin as prices were ridiculously high for flights and accommodation so we are staying in London for Easter. Fingers crossed weather will be clement and can go eggs hunting in Golders Green or Regents Park....
The first batch of results on amnio received last week were good, feel relieved and don't worry too much anymore. Consultants have been supportive and really do think there will be nothing but only a smallish baby but again OH and myself are not giants and a girl is most of the time smaller than a boy, right ? Have not bought anything yet, still not in the mood, though.
Have had bad news from work last Monday: my position will be transfered abroad while I am on maternity leave so there is nothing for me to come back to in July 2013... I know, it is a long time and I don't know how I should feel: not worried but a bit gutted. 6 years in the company and all will be gone in a whisper in 10 week time... There will be no effect on my maternity leave (I am getting the minimum only anyway, SMP, that's it) but no job with 2 small kids at 42. Scary, no ? We can afford so and OH is confident but I still feel bad not contributing and being financially dependant.
So yes, I have this feeling that I am floating above my life, looking at it without being in control of anything, living it without being in it. I am not upset nor frightened. Just a spectator of Nature and Economy :) Should I be proactive ? or just let it be for the moment until LO comes...

tennerlady - glad things seem a little less awful - take care

littleredmonkey - glad it's not just me! I just had a whole pack of fresh pasta for lunch - kidding myself that I'll probably be too tired for more than a piece of toast for tea tonight.

midgetm - that fart business really made me laugh - oh the indignity of it all ... I've also spent a scan really trying and failing not to fart - scanner was tactful enough not to comment.

hpbp - that was a good morale boost thanks :)

AFM, bleeding a bit again, but they've told me it's normal so I'm trying to stay positive, and put feet up lots until next scan. I got 'booked in' by GP today - I'm officially having a baby! GP was just great, and she said not to worry about all the carbs for now and to just eat whatever didn't make me feel sick - so that's good. xxx

Afternoon fellow older & wiser mums :)

Exhausted after a long trek to (successfully :)) pick up a Stokke Xplory. Am now too knackered to get it out of the car and hadn't managed my daily coffee since I bought one en route that tasted like burnt plastic & made me want to hurl! Bit nervous (don't really know why) that DP is telling one of his brothers today. We will need his support after Easter when we tell the DSDs and when their mother finds out (they were divorced a while ago) she may well, if history serves as a guide, 'pull a fishwife' and start ranting, screaming and yelling that DP doesn't love his girls - how could we do this to them; DP doesn't love them enough; how could we humiliate her, how selfish of us and will probably throw in that it's 'disgusting' at my age etc etc (women in Norway tend to have babies very young & she had hers at 21 & 22). She doesn't think first about what's right for the girls and we're terrified she will do all this in front of them or pass on some of these 'thoughts' to them so we want DP's brother standing by to help make sure they aren't exposed to any of it. DP's brother knows how to talk to her/calm her down & make her see sense...We've put a lot of time into considering how to tell them, making sure they will still feel as loved - that love doesn't dilute with another child but they will be loved the same & their brother/sister will love them too & we will need all their help with him/her and that it will be their proper brother/sister, despite only being a 'half' (DP's ex will no doubt indoctrinate them that it is not their sibling & they must never see it so. She is knotted up with bitter anger & hatred that DP 'humiliated her' by leaving her despite her not having loved him for many many years.) Anyway, I've rambled on. I'm sure that's enough 'sharing' for one day - this all happens weekend after this one...

Midgetm - I did chuckle at your scan/wind debacle :) For different reasons I felt mortified after my scan (& forgot to say due to pathetic elation ). The sonographer had said "Look - there's his little bladder...oh look...he's having a little wee!" and I just laughed thinking 'yeah right'. Turns out in my complete baby ignorance I had no idea that babies wee into the amniotic fluid constantly! Took me a good 24 hours to get my head around that one. NB. to self - must read more pregnancy books...

Tennerlady - still thinking of you. Hope you are feeling a little more able to cope x.

Hpbp - shame about Italy but good news about the amnio results! :)

Right! off for a lie down!

LRM - hope the scan went well today! x

hpbp I'm glad that the first set of amnio results came back with good news. Sorry to hear about the work stress.

FjordMor its not always easy telling family! DH told his parents yesterday and they were in complete shock! FIL took in well, MIL went into panic.

Apart from that, have a stinking cold, headache, sore throat which I'm attacking with fruit juice, paracetamol and the odd steam inhalation - looking longingly at the cough medicine....

39, 14+2, #1

Evening all,

Hpbp my DH also not working and I must say I love it. If money were no object I would keep it like that! Great news that the amnio tests are looking positive. Small is beautiful, right? (says the midget). I would stay floating for now, consider what you want but don't do much about it - now is your time to think about you and the baby.

bytheseaside are you bleeding much or spotting? Sorry you are going through that - no matter how hard you try it is difficult not to worry. I bled with DD a few times in the fisrt trimester and she is splashing about upstairs right now. I also had some earlier in this pregnancy too. Hope it passes soon.

Fjordmor you do sound like you will have a barrell load of fun when you get back home. At least you have someone who can keep her calm. I know many ex partners who have gone off the scale when they have heard baby news - I suppose to feel slighted is human nature but to externalise it when the relationship is ancient history is far from rational.

Velo I am considering a quick siwg of cough medicine. The cold I can deal with but the cough is driving me crazy. Every time I cough I feel my ligaments stretch in my stomach and it bloody hurts! Get well soon.

LRM - thinking of you, hope you have had nothing but good news.

Hope the rest of the seniors and taking it easy. I have barely moved from my sofa today and I really needed it. I am also sure I felt a movement today, mentioned it to the Dr and he said no way but I have been upduffed enough times to know the difference between wind and movement. Far too early to feel kicks but I think it may have been doing a little flip. Or maybe I am insane!

Midgetm - yup that's the thing...as a woman I can understand how she feels - well, I'm not as 'proud' or concerned what 'others' think so I probably wouldn't feel as deeply humiliated as she claims to (DP's bro says she's just sore as she was planning to leave him when she found someone else and just feels outraged at being 'dumped' rather than the dumper - yeah, um grow up?) but I can relate to feelings of weirdness re exes and how difficult it must be sending your kids to another home where another woman is part of the time...I really do, and I'm super-sensitive to it, even though she's been a complete bitch to me, hopes I will 'die' and doubtless will also hope my baby will 'die' (she wrongly believes I was involved in the break-up - I wasn't. Never even met DP until he was legally separated & divorce in process). But you hit the nail on the head...it's all about not externalising it, not letting the kids see it and not letting your feelings mess up how they feel they are allowed to feel about their other parent/sense of family/security and that's what makes me so cross with her. Saying to the girls that she hates me & therefore doesn't want them EVER to be left alone in my company and if they ever find themselves in that position they must call her immediately as she would want to come and remove them from my care, even when it's their father's custody time. They went from being relaxed & happy in my company to awkward & silent & rebuilding their trust and easing their anxiety has taken their father & me a lot of work. Anyway, should shut up about this as it's more for a 'relationships' discussion than ours. Needless to say, this is the background as to why DP & me telling his kids about my pregnancy is so nerve-wracking & such a big deal.

Hey ladies
Scan went well saw little beans legs and arms flapping about. Everything was where it should be. My blood tests from mid wife 4 weeks ago showed no issues. nucal was 1.9 She took some more bloods and as I am an old bird recommened me to see the consultant, but no worries. Did not have to wait long with a full bladder which was a plus, but the scanning device was contantly pushed on my bladder and nearly wizzed on her chair. I was also told I was 14 weeks not 13 so due now 4th October. Partner was amazed watching the screen, it was like he was watching a magic show being performed. Midwife said I was the most chilled mum she has seen for a while. So right chuffed with myself and have rewarded myself with a toffee crisp and bag of crisps while watching tv in bed with a cold glass of lucozade.
Thanks for all your kind thoughts it is very much appreciated ladies and as Hpbp said staying positive is the best thing we can all do. Good news about the amino tests as well and hope your little ones enjoy their egg hunt and the weather is good for you

Velo - hows the cough? I had a really bad one and went to boots they did give me some medicine that was ok. It did help.

Midgetm - Brillant having gas while getting scanned you are a star !!! To be honest midwife left the room to get some paper work today and said she would be a couple of minutes which I took advantage of and let one go. Bloody hell she was back in 2 bloody seconds. she came back in pulled a face and said nothing my partner was nearly wetting himself. I choose not to make eye contact with him or I would have burst out laughing . So classy, but as we know ladies it is better out then in and needs must.

Good old B&Q Friday sooooooooo not excited but needs must to re paint the bedroom and re do the whole kitchen. Having lunch with a friend first so may give me the strength to be bored to death looking a wood fixtures, ok in the paint aisle so may drag that out a bit. xxxxxxxxxxxxx

LOL At least you let yours go LRM and the bean wasn't drowning in a trumpy smog. Glad it all went well. My NT is next week - really excited as you get such a better look at the bean than at RMC ones. I can't wait to get a really good look at the little life inside me.

Fjord all this does make it more complicated. I have a friend who is a bit bonkers about her ex and their children and her children. But at least when i tell her she is being unreasonable to reigns herself in. And she always hides it from the kids. Well, most of the time anyway. It?s all a bit tricky and I feel for you.

Tennerlady hope you are feeling a bit better today x

Hi feel a lot better now thanks everyone iv decided don't care anymore what will be will be not worth getting stressed about just got to lOok forward to scan on weds and hope nuchal fold is ok but already getting it into my head now it's high risk because of age, history and diebetes so next hurdle is amino beginning of may I think this is why hb is being so distant towards pregnancy as he doesn't want to get attached x x hope you all have lovley restful day that's what iv got planned and minding my 3 nephews tonight as well as my 3 lads so houseful ha ha x

Hey ladies. Not checked in for a while, so thought i would catch up.

Ive got to 8 weeks, with almost constant bleeding...well i say bleeding its that minute amount of brown stuff when i wipe (sorry, tmi)

Yesterday had frank red blood, again, very small amount, none today as ive been taking things really really gently.

No pain, very sore breasts.
Scan next wednesday to see if there is anything there. tbh, i dont think that there will be anything there. I was presuming that i would mc, last weekend, and the weekend before that, but its rumbling on.
It can take weeks & weeks unfortunately.

Anyway, wont know anything till wednesday. So carrying on gently.
41, pregnancy no 8, i have 1 ds aged 8.

Hi y'all

Am still here, 37+2 and counting down... DS3 is due on a Thursday, but I have decided he'll come on Saturday evening as the telly is shite at the weekend, and his 2 big brothers were also late!

He is a very active baby, but sadly will be born too late to run in the London Marathon!

I am very tired now, and can't get much done. Mind you, I have a long day as DP commutes and is away 14 hours a day, and we have no family nearby, so I think I'm entitled to be a bit knackered - already have 2 boys under the age of 5 (and soon to have 3 OMG )

Saw the geriatric obstetrician on Monday, placenta is good, flow to baby great, everything is just fine and dandy! After the scan, the midwife told me she couldn't understand why we were there at all. I pointed out it was just an age related thing - she was quite surprised! Nice to hear this at age 44!

Hey ladies... I am 40+2 today and my waters have just broken! Will go into hospital when contractions properly kick in.

Will soon have a baby sister for my 18 and 17 year old daughters !!!

Go bobble good luck petal. Sending you energy virtually. Not Long now x

Good luck bobble you got built in babysitters already that's not fair ha ha x

MrsNesbit Hope all is ok.

Good luck Bobble!

I haven't checked in for a while. There's so much going on on this thread!

I've finally managed to get a 12 week scan date - this wednesday. I think I'll be well over the 12 weeks so I hope its not too late for some of the checks.

I'm over all that sickness now so I've started slimming world. I bought the magazine and have been following the plan from there for now until I can get to join a club. I've also been walking regularly.

Good luck bobblesmamma. Can't wait to hear when she's arrived!!

Hi all iv had but of back ache and pains underneath shooting down my legs and when iv just been to loo there was a browney discharge on the tissue when I wiped don't know wether to be concerned I'm 11 + 4 this is all I need if it's a start of mc any ideas lady's ???

tenner brown is old blood - usually ok. When is your scan? I had brown discharge with my two girls and current pg. My mc was red and lots of it.

Not till weds but I'm at medical disorder clinic on tues to see diebetic practisioner .... It's like when you finishing period is only way to discribe it but pain are more like dull dragging aches nothing sharp just there constant x

Fingers crossed all is ok for you tenner You could call OOH and get a reassurance scan, but perhaps best to just rest up and see what happens? You already had a scan at 8 weeks iirc, and all was well then. Hopefully that is a comfort in itself.

Nothing there last time I went so feel a bit more relaxed just going to bath my youngest and his cousin then put them to bed and go to bed myself do you think I should take couple tablets for pains could just be ligament stretching I hope but thanks for your reassurance valiumqueen it helps to be able to talk to somebOdy x x x