Dec 08 ladies getting re-clackered, with tantrums from toddlers we're sure to be knackered

[traceface]

Loved your title rubs
Never started a thread before so hope this works...can anybody find it?
hello....

Pubes you can get down on all fours and kind of rock back and forth or do a sort of figure of eight movement to move bub.

Hello again, sorry to hear about your painful tummy, Pubes, sounds like she might be having a relaxing lie-down. Enjoy the cheerfulness!

Veg, I'm glad I brought a smile to someone's face today, feeling a bit grumpy and hormonal and put upon at the moment so I'm glad my cock amused you, aw 'twere .

LadyT, you poor thing, that is a lot of worries all at once. T is a little fatty so I'm afraid I can't really help on the eating front (except that the anxiety I feel when T's off his food due to teeth or illness must dwarf that of your struggling with it every day). I hope the GP is reassuring and either makes you realise there's no cause for concern or is able to point you in the direction of some genuinely useful help.

Mom, congratulations! That's very exciting news. How are you feeling about it?

WG, I can on;y echo what others have said about you being very brave to go to couples counselling and think it's a really good idea. I sometimes wish I could do the same, I would be up for it but DP not. Good luck with the search for someone, it's not like you can just put a request out on Facebook or whatever. Tavistock sounds good though.

This is a tres measly catch up, am still catching up on lost sleep from the holiday (T not a fab traveller and like baby Kiwi naps a lot in the car hence not so much at night).

Am a real grump at the moment, I think there's quite a lot of unresolved resentment with DP about various things, plus early PG hormones and tiredness and worries about work, childcare, move etc. But that's all it is, I think, a grump. Hol was nice though. Good to do things together rather than in shifts as we usually do.

Potentially, I can't guarantee that

Am on phone on train so posting quick before I lose the signal! Spot: glad you had a good hol, take care of yourself. Early pg is rubbish.

Daisy: hooray for the tiny baby! And for another good hol (the NW is obv the place to go!).

Veggie: sounds like an ace day, your boys will have such good memories of NL.

Rubes: second V's idea of hands and knees to encourage the baby to ease off.

Teething here too, big hugs for those in the same boat. Pesky canines.

Sybs - if you're in Latchmere, please please get in touch - would love to see you as we're literally about 3 mins walk from there - for the next 2.5 weeks anyway... EEK! Please please drop in as it would be heavenly - are you on FB? I'll have a look for you and if so, will message you my mobile number/email.

Had a lovely weekend this weekend. Now feeling a bit sad DH not around during the week too. He's hating his job at the moment, so really feel for him. He's so jealous of my mat leave, it's terrible.

I was reading article on the loo this morning (as you do!) re TV being bad for children. Now feeling v guilty as DD is goggling Zinzilla at the moment. EEK.

Right, will turn it off and get on with breakfast.

Oh dear. Cock, cock, double cock, more tears at 10pm, whole fist in mouth - could feel 4 new teeth coming through all at once. Poor Bugger was so hungry probably since he didn't eat much during the day, he grabbed a whole flapjack that dh had just made, shoved the whole thing in his mouth then coughed and choked a little and vomited up a big blob of his dinner which that dog then ate - charming.

Gobbled down about more milk then back to sleep till 7am. Heard his coughing again then really upset crying and found him sitting in a pool of vomit in the cot . I think he is coughing which is making him vomit and he has a slight runny nose and did 4 poo's yesterday could the cold / cough be related to the teeth? He won't eat breakfast - just a square of toast then only wanted milk but otherwise seems just upset by teeth but no more vomit. Happy after the Dentinox Gel goes on so assuming it's all teeth.

Thanks vaggie I will get on all four's soon Strangely last night I didn't really have the pain at all - I wonder if the cheerfulness made her move positions! I certainly got a booting for it!

Right, here all day waiting for mattress - hmm not sure I want to test out the super duper waterproof cover I ordered just yet Hope he gets better for tonight

ok dh has just said he thinks its all teething related. Poor little bugger. Off to get him some Meds today after his bed arrives I think

Hello, am copying Effie with a quickie from the train.

We have just returned from a lovely weekend in Suffolk with two other couples and six children all together.

Sadly DD2 still has a slightly upset tum, fever and now horrible conjunctivitis. She is utterly miserable but Dr won't see her as it's "probably viral". I am sure they are right but I wish there was something I could do to help as she is utterly miserable.

Last night we topped the loo brush incident for disgustingness. I got in the bath with the girls as DD2 was so clingy. I filled it with bubbles to cheer her up and we all had a lovely time. Then DD2 was taken out by DH and DD1 and I soaked for a bit longer. About 5 mins into the prolonged soak the bubbles parted a little and I spied brown water. Yup, sure enough DD2 had diarrhoead in the bath and we were lying around in it. Nice.

Got to run but wanted to tell LadyT that O straddling your thigh with her feet on the ground is a great weight bearing exercise. I remember my baby massage tutor encouraging us to do it every day.

oh Avo -that is good!

Avo oh oh oh that is gross poor you and DD1, how did she react. DS1 is still a little traumatised from when DS2 was about a week old and he pooed in the bath we were all sharing & that was just a small baby poo.

Rubs, that is v exciting about the new bed, I hope DS takes to it and his teeth don't bother him too much. Four at once though. Poor thing, T only has four in total. Glad the cheerfulness helped the positioning. You know the remedy now...

Avo, your poor DD2 (and poor you for that moment of realisation). V surprised the doc won't see her though as they can give them drops that clear it up quickly. And how does he know it's "probably viral" if he hasn't seen her?

Just back from my doc appt where I told them I was clackered. Apparently am 7 and a half weeks and due on 1 Jan! I was a bit surprised though to see that you don't get a 12 week scan here, just 20 weeks. Is that normal? I always thought you waited until the 12 week scan to tell people but I don't think I can wait until 20 weeks, it will be bleeding obv by then. Sadly am not ladyt and already have a pot belly!

Oh Spot! That's lovely that you're 7.5 weeks - hurray! And it is quite strange not to have a 12 week scan - where are you? I'm sure you can find out why or if you can have one.

I've just been to GP for my 34 week check. V odd. Am now totally exhausted as have been to shops and back and also to doctor. And am now on my knees. Very weedy. I think I'll have a little sleep this pm - lucky me!

DD just having some chicken for lunch and I'm rather jealous!

Avo - that poo story is ming! POor you and DD! And other DD for having squits, but I do feel more sorry for you and DD1!! Cripes!

Gross!

Hello everyone, I am very behind!!!

ladyt, You. Need. To. Learn. To. Drive.
As a bit of a cycling fanatic who will mostly get around by foot or bike, I still use the car, even though I am only 1 mile from Cambridge City Centre. I have friends 10 miles away who I would hardly see if I had to use the bus or bike there with DS. We are moving to somewhere 4 miles out of the centre of cambridge, and even though I am good at avoiding using the car, I still think with 2 small kids I will have to use it quite a lot. I am not surprised you feel isolated, and being a big city/London type person must make it loads worse. I know it will cost money but you got as far as taking your test before didn't you, so maybe you could try and pass before no 2 arrives?
As for the toddler groups, hopefully you might find some nice people there. I don't really like going to them either, I end up wandering around following DS and making half-hearted conversation with people and worrying that everyone else knows each other. Much prefer meeting up with people I know!! But will probably have to do it when on Mat Leave to keep myself sane, also would be nice to meet people who live right near me for cups of tea etc when I move.
It's also good that the HV has referred you to the doc re DD's eating and walking. I agree with everyone else that the walking thing is unlikely to be a problem but the eating thing would probably put your mind at rest to talk to someone who's opinion you might actually respect!!

rubs sorry about your stomach pains. Does sound like its not the separation thing - I also thought that was not meant to be painful. Hope it is just the way she is lying and you can persuade her to move. I had a good Tara Lee yoga DVD that I did loads first time round (none this time, ahem) that has loads of positions and advice on stuff like that, maybe you coudl try something like that. Sorry about poor teething little man. DS is teething too, but not ill with it, but there is a bit of moaning and waking up in the night going on (YAWN!)

Avo that is grim about the poo!!! YUK!

spot hurrah for 7.5 weeks, that is v odd about 12 week scan. I thought they were standard everywhere. Could you think about paying for one if it really is true that you don't get one where you are (maybe a nuchal one so you get extra tests for the money?)

daisy glad the camping trip was OK and hope things with your DH improve soon.

katie the cottage plan sounds most exciting!!

veggie that soft play centre sounds ace!

Right I had better go as have taken a while to write this at lunch at work!! There was loads of other stuff I meant to write but I just can't keep up, I don't know how you lot do it. Been lurking this weekend on my phone but no time to post as MIL was here and didn't want to be too rude. She's gone now - hurray, as she was a bit of a PITA in parts it has to be said.

PS Also meant to ask - DD still has cradle cap - does anyone have any tips for getting rid of it?

Spot I think someone who was in the original group from the antenatal thread didn't have a 12 week scan. She was in the North East i think. I had thought that it had been decided it was necessary for early detection of problems though. If you don't mind me asking are you over 35? all mums over 35 should be offered the scan and blood test to check for Downs syndrome...I think. Gosh I'm so excited your 7.5 weeks we need to have someone else get clackered in another few weeks and every few weeks thereafter so we can have a continuous flow of clackered peoples.

I've just heard from my niece who came to visit late last year. Her dad my brother just had a little service and celebration for the marriage he had last year (very confusing I know but his previous wife refused to sign the divorce papers in time so he could marry his new floosy power to her I say!). My niece sent me photos of her and her 3 sisters ranging in age from 14-18. They look amazing, they are unbelievably beautiful girls, it's like the Coors, it's seems wrong that there are no ugly or plain ones. My 3rd niece even sang some songs with the band. I'm so proud of them all they have grown into really wonderful young women. It's all down to my former DSIL as my brother always worked stupidly long hours so she was practically a single mum. It's so sad they are not a family anymore but I guess I have a new nephew to show for it, but he has a lot to live up to compared to his sisters.

Lady I was thinking about what you said about DD being afraid of some foods. DH & I took a while to realise this with DS1 and it hasn't really been til he was 2.5 that we could work with it to try to reduce his fear. People who haven't experienced it have trouble understanding it but it really is a fear. DS1's little friend in Derby was the complete opposite as he would pick leaves and twigs and put them in his mouth! He literally would eat anything! Surprisingly though, I've just realised that DS1 is a lot bigger than his friend, who is a couple of months older. So i guess in the end they grow with what they've got (and I know what your thinking but seriously DS1 also literally existed on air pies).

I hope your next DD eats better though Lady because 1) you will really see it has nothing to do with what you do and 2) it is so satisfying to watch them eat. Poor DS2 this morning was sucking on the big pip of a mango and I was so excited about it I was taking photos of him!

Hi SL cross posted, will you be sharing any MIL stories you know I love them.

JJ is your MIL still freaking about you SIL going to Greece.

Beans a friend of mine used a mix of essential oils that worked nicely and smelt amazing I could find out what the mix was. If you can't be faffed with that you can rub cottonseed oil or olive oil into it. How often do you wash it?

Just reread my post and it is very babbled about my brother and his wedding thing. Basically he and the women he officially didn't leave his wife for planned to get married a year ago but my ex DSIL refused to sign the divorce in time for the wedding so they had to cancel. Then his girlfriend got pregnant and so they had a registry wedding and now a year later after that baby has been born and is now 6 months old, they have had a renewal of vows thing and a reception. And my niece sang with the band at the reception not the Coors.

Hhi Veggie - I don't think I can be faffed re the essential oils - all a bit exhausting at the moment with burgeoning bump - I will give olive oil a go instead! Have done before and it worked, but it seems to be back. I wash it about once or twice a week. not much.

How long was your brother with his first wife for? And why did the officially break up? x

Yeah I was thinking that Beans, also might be a bit smelly and might be overwhelming for you. I asked about the hairwashing thinking about the fact that frequent washing can strip the oils but just realised both my boys got CC and I rarely wash their hair, I think it's just one of those things. I did hear something once about overactive hair follicles. Poor DD2 had it all down his forehead and in his eyebrows at one stage. It made him look like a chimpanzee!

Spot - that's great to get official conformation of clackerdom - yay. I find the lack of 12 weeks scan a little odd though as most hospitals now do the combined downs nuchal at the 12 week scan and I know that can't be done after about 13 weeks - as last time I was moving and the new hospital didn't get me the test in time (I was clueless and didn't know I would've missed out on the test otherwise I would have raised hell) I had the triple test at 15 weeks but it's not preferred so I'd look into that and see if they've got it straight.
Vaggie that previous wife sounds like quite a piece of work!
SL - thanks - yeah strangely last night the pains weren't apparent and today none so far - I'll see if they happen later in the day like usual or perhaps the cheerfulness last night cured me!
Lady I never thought of it until Summer said, but I totally couldn't agree more - that is probably why you feel so isolated! You won't believe how much better you'll feel living out there to be able to just get into the car. Honestly, I'd go mad if I couldn't just put ds into the car and drive to the shops or to see friends rather than faffing about only going where public transport permits! Ditch the private birth, and forfeit the 3k - get yourself a nice car which will give you the motivation to get the license and you can also get the mirror and pay for the kitchen! [ok lecture hat off now ]

Still waiting for this mattress...........
ds down for a nap - hopefully last sleep in his cot as he seems to feel ok today.

oh and re cc - I used to put loads of baby oil on and then kind of lightly slough it off when it went all soft and after a couple of times it didn't come back - not sure that's the best official advice though

Lady I just re-read my post - didn't mean to sound harsh at all so hope I didn't offend, I just know you'll be so much happier being able to drive to visit me where ever you want

Hehe, veggie, no specific MIL stories really, just general build up of irritation over the weekend.

She particularly pissed me off as DH was having a lie in on Sunday morning (I had one on Sat) and he hadn't got up at about 9am, and she kicked off saying she was bored, and she "just wasn't used to just sitting around", which frankly pissed me off as EVERY time we go to hers there is no effort to give US anything to do of any interest, it's all I'll potter round seeing to my chickens and doing XYZ while you just sit around bored in my house and I ignore you. And we were doing stuff all day every day with her that we thought SHE would like that I found massively boring (bloody plane museum, dullsville). I wasn't dressed and didn't want to disturb DH and also had had sod all sleep. If she was that bored she could have said, "Well why don't you have a lie in" and let us go back to bed while she goes out with DS. She gets up as early as or earlier than DS (6-7am) every day but she never ever offers to take him/get him up, and DH is always hinting or even directly asking her to. AND when he is at her house, SHE asks DH to get up and let out her chickens, take the dog for a walk so she can have a lie in!!! Even when I was night feeding DS, so I lost my lie in to recover as DH couldn't do the dog walking and take care of DS at the same time. OOOOOOOOOOH reallly pissed me off.

The other thing that annoys me is that she stresses out DH by making snide comments about DS getting too much attention (that I let wash over me as I couldn't care less what she thinks, also I think I may not get them as I am a lazy parent and ignore him more than DH). Which I just think is shit, DH adores DS and LIKES giving him attention. The fact that she parented by ignoring a lot more than DH does doesn't mean she was bloody better, just lazy IMO. And I say this as someone who probably ignores DS too much and parents in a similar way to her but isn't necessarily proud of it!! Pisses me off!

Right I have to post this now as I have to work, sorry for being rude and not responding to anyone else!!

What a nightmare Summer! That'd all piss me off to no end too!
ds's mattress arrived I'm going to make it up when he wakes up [eek] Then will have to head out as I need a smaller flatter pillow for him.

Right, must stop checking MN every 10 minutes now... at least I don't have to wait around at home anymore! Very good service from baby mattresses online - I can highly them!

Summer you are very restrained I think I would have said something very passive aggressive and ended up in a huge fight. Does your DH get as annoyed as you do?

Beans, about the telly thing, I know T watches too much telly (they say "don't use it as a babysitter, watch it with them". I'm sorry but that's the reason I have it on, so I can go and cook/have a shower/make a phone call etc. Why the hell would I want to watch CBeebies with him? Except first thing of course, couldn't slide into the day without teletubbies). But there is the "ideal" scenario and "real life". It's the same with childcare. According to an article in the Family section of the Guardian on Sat I am condemning T to a lifetime of poor relationships and delinquentish behaviour as I send him to a nursery. And am considering going up to three days a week, as more work is coming in. It really annoys me because you get all worried about how whatever you do to get by is damaging your child, and then some expert will pop up and say, "no, actually the most important thing is confidence in your parenting". How can you have any when you're being told by smuggos from all sides that your choices are A Bad Thing?
Sorry, no one asked for that particular rant, it's just been bothering me since i read the article. Especially as it starts off with the disclaimer "of course, this doesn't mean it's bad being a working mother" but then goes on to cite all this evidence that it is. We cannot bloody win.

Veggie, I will be a mere stripling of 34 when DC2 comes along so can't ask for the scan on that basis. I seem to remember reading something about Brighton not routintely doing them, and now I come to think of it my sis in Berkhamsted didn't either, she actually paid for one privately because she'd had all the worry about the pregnancy, previous MCs, etc, and wanted some reassurance.

Oh, and I also wanted to say on the toddler groups thing, I actually find them really good. Ok, the church halls are a bit scummy and you probably don't want to think too much about the sheer number of germs on the toys but i have met some nice people to talk to there and T loves racing around on the little trikes and other things he doesn't have at home and generally getting trampled on by older boys which is a Good Life Lesson. I think they probably come into their own even more when you've got a newborn as well and need time and space to feed while the toddler goes mental in a safe environment. And you also get a rich tea biscuit, which for some reason I never buy myself.

Right, am procrastinating, back later amigas.