Discussion amongst Mums with babies born in December 2008

[Veggiemummy]

Hope you all can find it, Moms title was perfect I thought.

Phew that was emotional. Just finished watching the Arsenal game 2-2, we are very lucky.

I think I'm ready for bed. DS2 has been a bit trying today. Really whining easily and just generally draining. He went down for his nap this afternoon so DS1 & I set about making hot cross buns. He woke just as i was putting the mix aside to sit for 45mins. We were just about to start in making dinner (tomato spirals ala cbeebies 'I can cook') and he woke up in a major strope. He just cried and clung to me, thankfully DS1 was able to continue with it a bit otherwise tea would have been a bit late. Thankfully I found some pulsitilla and he settled down and brightened up quite quickly after it. Then at bedtime he went a bit mental, I think bathtime gets him a bit too excited. Finally he went to sleep but has just woken up a second time. Also his screams sound more like a castratta than a baby, I'm sure dogs up & down our street must be getting annoyed by him. I've been quite impatient with him and in front of DS1, which I think had upset DS1 as he hates hearing me get annoyed and probably doesn't like DS2 being spoken to like that. I feeling a bit bad motherish I just wish I could be more patient. I'm having one of those days where I feel like I'm gonna break these children. I've been given these lovely souls and I'm wrecking them.

Lady that's interesting what you say about when you were pregnant with DD. When I was pregnant with both boys I could kind of 'feel' their personalities. Both times I described to DH what they would be like and have been spot on in both cases.

Hi everyone, I can?t believe how much chatting is going on, so I?ve only skimmed ? sorry if I?ve missed anything important.

Veggie and Katie I really feel for your boys struggling with bullying (especially the rope ? horrific), and you struggling with what to do for the best. I hope it sorts out quickly with no lasting effects

Trace love your new pictures! Weird about the symptoms, how would you feel if it turns out you are pregnant? I found stopping BF more painful than starting ? but I think it all settled down in about 4 or 5 days

Effie I?m with you on work ? 4 days is too much for me and I?d much prefer 3, or even 2. I?m using my holiday to do a shorter week every 3 weeks or so, which is quite nice. My DH is also self employed ? there is an option for working for him too, but that would end in the divorce courts immediately! Also, I am more comfortable with one of us having a regular salary, just in case one of DH?s customers are slow to pay (obviously that is reliant on me not getting the sack?) I hope you come to a decision before it wears you out

Screeching ? DD has discovered her high pitched happy noise this week, and tested it out on her great gran at the weekend, don?t think she was that impressed . And equally she?s rivalling some of the other babies on stroppiness ? in fact my Mum has declared that she doesn?t want to see her once she?s turned 2 until she?s a rational adult, because she?s so bad already (and given my Mum?s wobbles about spending time with her last year, I don?t actually know if she?s joking ?)

Yay for the school Aubi! And what a cutie your DD2 is, talking on th phone

LadyT even if anyone dare criticise your choices on having children and careers ? then could argue that you?ll be back on board career wise quicker after one (slightly longer) break, than stopping, starting again, stopping again? And totally agree with Rubes, that they should be nothing but delighted. (ps when you find out how to become a contented 50?s farmer?s wife, please let me know the secret? )

Rubes at various times my 2 best friends both got told by their then boyfriends that they were taking a break to sort their heads out (and both their problems where far less than your DB?s) ? I was outraged on behalf of my friends and suggested both of them were better of without them, tried to convince them not to go back after the break ended etc etc. Fortunately they both ignored me, and still allowed me to be their bridesmaids, so happy endings all round. I?d say head clearing time is a good thing, but the worry for the one doing the waiting is pretty awful. I hope your DB talks to you/his DP soon, so you can stop worrying about him

SL I also felt the ?isn?t she cute?, as I would a friends baby, but nothing more for a few days til we were both home and the madness of Christmas had passed. For me, it was seeing DH so in love with her which melted my cold heart. I still knew I?d do anything and everything for her though

And now she?s awake, and trying to type, so I?ll go before she ruins everything, despite still having 3 pages to catch up on. One quick question ? does anyone?s LO?s getting stinky breath when they?re teething? DD smells like a dog, really yucky. I thought it was cause she hates brushing her teeth when teething, but this time she?s tooth brushing as happily as ever, but still stinks. What a delightful girl!

My phone is playing up so I'd better post before it conks out! Just wanted to say Veggie you're doing a great job. I find dealing with 2 at once hard work and ds2 is relatively calm! He's just into everything at the moment - I had a day just with ds1 ths week and it was soooo much easier. Add a grumpy poss teething baby to the mix and it's a massive achievement to get to the end of the day intact. You managed to make buns and cook tea, that's gold medal level!

Ds2 is letting his new mobilit get to his head - last night after his bath (and dressed in clean vest and pjs) he managed to climb ds1's stool and dive headfirst into his bath while I was occupied with hair washing . I think he was objecting to being taken out too early.

Zoe: you are right about the self-employed v regular job mix. It does make sense for me to keep going, even if met of my wages are eaten by childcare and travel, especially while DH's business is getting off the ground. And much as I've enjoyed the extra days at home thanks to the pox, I'm quite pleased to be going to work today! 3 days would be ideal but not sure how I could make it work.

Speaking of the pox, how is ds Daisy?

Morning,

veggie You are a wonderful mummy! Its so hard dealing with two, and its hard to get the balance right I find. I get so cross with DD sometimes, just for silly things. If someone can bottle patience I'll happily order a few gallons!

I am a bit by DS's potential pox. He was very disturbed in the night, writhing about. I assumed a bit itchy maybe, so gave him 2.5ml of Piriton(bottle said it was ok) and he eventually settled. But this morning we have no more spots. The ones on his feet and legs have crusted a bit, as has his bottom. But a few others just look like they have faded. So now I'm thinking maybe not pox and just some sort of virus/teething rash

Daisy - Sorry about the pox and sorry but I did at your suggestion to dh to proof read your post!

Thanks Zoe - I hadn't heard a thing and I was worrying and checking my phone for messages all night thinking the worst etc. A big worry of mine is the drinking thing and I kept wondering how bad it is, and if I'll ever be able to lol over a few bottles of wine with him in future, or will I be avoiding drinking in front of him in fear of some kind of program he is in - think I'm over thinking it until I get some facts from him. Have texted the dp but nothing yet.

All you lot finding it hard to announce your pregnancies! I feel like such a simpleton around all you professional lot - You should tell anyone to shove it if they have any negative career comments then prove them all wrong! I'm horrified that it has made you feel the opposite of how you should. I was bursting each time as I couldn't wait to tell then again - lets compare our careers i suppose! I agree, stick it on FB and answer no questions if you don't want to! Done.

Yay on the walking Effie!

SL - your Mil makes mine look like Mother Teresa, but I'd slash my wrists and lay in a hot bath before living with her permanantly! Sounds like you would too though!

Katie I agree that the letter was the right thing - as is talking to boy1's mum as others have suggested. Need to get to the bottom of this!

So, Trace - when does the testing happen? You never know!

Communication - sounds like a man thing in general - I've got every self help book under the sun to address it, and I'm still none the wiser.... dh is crap at it and unless I want to know how much the tyres weigh on his bike, or how many points he has to date in the Summer series races I may as well talk to the wall Then on the flip side - he tells me / and remembers the most useless pieces of information! I've learnt to live with it

Thanks ladies. I'm feeling better this morning. He had a fragile night again but I'm not surprised as he looks as though all his teeth are coming through at once. It's also poor DS1 I feel bad for. He loves his little brother and I'm sure it upsets him when I'm shouty with DS2 esp as he's not really doing anything wrong. It was also because DS1 & I were having such a great time making the hotcross buns. We had the radio up load and were both singing at the top of our voices. Then DS2 woke up i such a mood and kind of killed our fun. But then my reaction didn't help. Poor DS1 I feel I'm always apologising too him for going over the top. I spoke to him afterwards and said I was sorry I'd gotten so grumpy & shouty at DS2, and he said 'that's ok mummy, I don't mind'.

Rubs I'm a bit like your DH always seem to remember really trivial bits of information. It's nice you humour him, I wonder if that's what DH does with me. The problem with being able to remember the stuff is, I remember it because I find it interesting, so I assume everyone else does. Oh but the people I must have completely bored or even horrified with TMI about BFing

Morning all - I have no idea about the pox, I'm afraid, Daisy - eek!

I've just had a phone call from my first love boyfriend, which is odd in itself. But even odder is that he and his girlfriend are coming to look at our house as potential buyers this evening. Erm. That is very odd. My DH has never met him as we're not really in contact. But if his name gets mentioned, which is does on occasion, DH refers to him as a twat - just on principle!!! Chances are I might be there as well as it's at 6.15. V v odd. Not sure whether to tell DH or not! Ho hum.

ladyt - with this pregnancy, we didn't do a big announcement or anything, but we just told people when we saw them, so it just sort of filtered out! Was actually quite a nice way to do it. Although we did tell our families straight away. Some of our less close friends are still surprised when they see me as am now over 6 months and looking quite preggers!

Oh Veggie - cross posted and had meant to say - do not worry remotely about being shouty on occasion - I think it's inevitable with two children - I do it with DD sometimes when she's misbehaving and screamy and I'm tired and overwraught. It really won't do any harm in the long term. You are clearly an amazing mother, so don't think twice about it!

Just quickly as on phone - it appears we may have the pox here too. I hope it becomes obvious one way or another soon!

I did tell DH and he found it v amusing - looking forward to meeting the "infamous" ex!

Have I been infecting you all via the thread? Sorry to hear the pox has got to you Summer.

Veggie: it's hard to juggle your attention. Am certain ds2 won't remember any shouting or crossness, and it's more than outweighed by all the cuddles and dancing about

Beans that's very wierd. Not sure how I would feel about that TBH. A very good friend of the family looked at my parents place last week and has put an offer in (even though another offer has already been accepted) and I had a bit of a wobble at the thought of someone I know living in MY house!
Sorry about the Poxy babies, although good to get it out of the way. DS and DD always manage to escape it despite me making sure they are exposed to it.
Veggie, you are a great Mum and we all have shouty days (me probably a little too many). Your kids will forgive you.
Just spoke to Boy 1's Mum to apologise for DS pushing him yesterday and she knew nothing about it. We ended up having a good chat about what we could do try and help the boys be friends and are going to get together a few times over the holidays so I feel better now. I dn't think it will resolve itself quickly, but if we can observe them playing together, rather than just always hearing it second hand then we can see for ourselves whether it really is a problem.
She did ask me what B1 had done to upset DS so I told her of a few of the incidents I had heard of and she was angry that the school hadn't informed her and was very apologetic, so I feel we are on a more even footing now. She is aware of what's going on so we can work together to address it, let's hope.

Oh brilliant, Katie - that's great news - v chuffed for you. Hurray! And to be honest, it might not resolve things, but it's a step in the right direction and if you make friends with the Mum then chances are that they will behave themselves much better together! Well done you for taking the bull by the horns - I'm v impressed.

Yes, it is quite weird - although he won't buy it, I'm sure, as it's out of their budget. not sure why they're coming round, to be honest!

I'm rather jealous of the pox as well - really keen for DD to get it asap so it's out of the way and done with!

Right, bring on Easter and staying with Mum so I've got an extra pair of hands on board to help out a bit!

Morning (well, by the time I post this, afternoon..)!

Gosh there's a lot of activity on this thread at the mo! Lots to catch up on.

Rubena/LadyT - meeting up when DH is away would be LOVELY we should definitely book a date. Be very nice to have that to look forward to.

Daisy Hope poor DS is better today?

Veggie You are a BRILLIANT mum and we all have days like that - hell, I think I've had 15 months like that! I bet you are vastly more patient and kind than me . I shall find out if DH is going to any Australia games for you, I have a feeling he is, actually..!

Rubena - You asked re parents and if I let them know what I think of their lack of grandparent-ish behaviour. Not really, to be honest. I guess it's just how they are and I don't know what I can say. The irony is my grandparents looked after me and my sister a HUGE amount, they were amazing. But my parents are just useless. My dad is a bit obsessed by my niece, he's forever going on about how "impressive" she is and occasionally making negative-ish remarks about DD, which really upsets me. But they aren't meant to be negative, he just says things like "oh she never sit still" "such a fidget", "don't be grumpy!" but never praises her. At least your parents travel so aren't physically THERE to help - mine live minutes away and yet have never once offered to look after DD in the daytime. Whereas my in-laws have on occasion hopped on the train and travelled 2 hours to take her out for a walk when I'm particularly exhausted, bless em.

Kiwi - your dad is wrong! Your DD is absolutely lovely - and she is a busy little bee, but that's great - means she's curious and bright and interested and that's such a good trait in a child! And she's absolutely charming - with fingers just like yours - hee hee!

When is your DH away again?

Beans, I think I just Friend Requested you on FB, but I thought we were already friends . Are your initals SH?

Hello everyone,

Just a quick lunchtime post..

Sorry to all those with the pox/suspected pox. I can still remember the itch very well, I'm dreading DD getting it.

WG Re your question about cats. A newborn with cats is fine as the cat is disinterested or frightened by crying. A toddler and cats is a different story as the scratched face DD was sporting last week illustrated.

SL Our friends didn't believe DH when he told them either. I must seem unmaternal too! I found it hard telling people really. It is announcing unprotected sex to the world really! My friend said she was nervous of telling her dad she was pregnant as he'd know she'd had sex! She'd beeen married for three years, I expect he had guessed .

katie Glad things got resolved with the other mum. Good on you for making the call.

kiwi Maybe your parents will be more helpful with your DH being away. Mine are often next to useless but my mum was a star and came and stayed when DH was away.

beans OOoh that'll be weird! My first love ended up going on a mutal friend's stag do with DH, that was odd. Oh do tell us how it went later.

veggie Well done on the hot cross buns. I made them one year and I've bought nicer ones. I was very disappointed. Yeast cookery is very difficult.

Hello ladyT have a super time with your mum.

Must work....

Oh zoe I'm not sure about the dog breath thing! Could you ring your dentist and ask? It reminded me I must make an appointment for a check up!

Should we have a York meet up soon zoe and trace and anyone else who fancies the trip?

Katie - yup am SH!

I've just been for lunch with a friend and while there, another ex walked past. Luckily he didn't see me as was hiding! But it is a day of exes. Very odd indeed. man, he's gone unattractive. Mind you, I'm hardly one to talk! He was terribly beautiful in his day and entirely boring. Actor, don't you know. And a vegan, which is so different from me (staunch carnivore) and into meditation, which I'm too fidgety for. Did try once with him, and all I could think of was shoes. He was awfully handsome, though, so I always thought he must be interesting. And he was on telly while I was seeing him, so was slightly in awe. Terrible star-struck creature.

Hi all, longer post as DS is asleep (finally)

I am not completely sure it's chicken pox here either. He has red spots over his body and couple have turned into blisters. But they don't seem to be getting worse, if anything they are getting better, and he isn't bothered at all. But the blistery ones make me think it probably is. I phoned the doctors and they said not to bring him in and that it almost certainly sounded like CP. Bummer.

beans that does sound weird!! Did he just hear your house was up for sale and call you? My friend got married to a guy she sold her flat to (complete stranger) I always thought that was an impressive way to pull.

katie that sounds so good about talking to the other mum. Had the school said nothing to her then? They do sound like they are being a bit crap to be honest, good that it's out in the open a bit now.

kiwi that is sooo mean of your dad to make negative comments about your DD. how rude!

bugger ds has woken up. How annoying. He's only been asleep for half an hour. GRRRRR.

SL - great though, that he's got CP and doesn't sound like it's bothering him too much - could be a painless way to get it out of his system.

Re my ex - no quite randomly he and his girlfriend are looking to buy together and she arranged the viewing with our estate agents, and told him which address it was and he recognised it! V odd.

I'm dying to go to bed tonight - had a bit of a late one last night. Well, midnight. But that's late for me!

Yeah will be great, when I am convinced it is CP. I am just feeling a bit mean for keeping him inside when I'm not sure! Apart from we are still going to MILs but won't be able to see my bro and SIL and nephew! Boo! and will be stuck inside at MILs, nightmare, though she does have a lovely big garden if we do get some non-rainy patches of weather.

I have a question...how many of you still spoon feed your DCs, and if so what?

I am thinking of going hardline on DS as I gave him some pasta with pesto for lunch, and he was licking the pesto off the spoon, so clearly liked. He likes pasta if mushed up and mixed in with stuff, but he wouldn't eat the whole pasta!! I am thinking of refusing to spoon feed him main courses from now on and chopping them up not roughly whizzing them as well. I am still happy spoonfeeding him yoghurt, porridget etc as long as he is happy (when he insists on having the spoon and doing it himself I let him even though it makes an almighty mess!) The other thing is he has been having jars reasonably frequently recently as we haven't been cooking so much due to trying to keep house tidy for viewings, must wean him off those too!! Anyway just wondering if any of you are still at the spoon feeding stage with main courses. I think most people I know probably aren't though they may give a bit of help here and there. He does eat sandwiches and stuff himself, and would clearly be capable of it!

SL - DD only just starting to spoonfeed herself entirely - since last week. And for a couple of weeks before that I was loading up the spoon and giving it to her to feed herself. I do try cutting up her food really small rather than whizzing it and I have some success with things that she likes, but with the food she's not so keen on, I have to still whizz it. I don't really mind, though. And figure she'll be on proper food before too long!

Beans Thank you! Yes she is a non-stop whirlwind of activity, bless her, but DH and I agree that's clearly a sign of her genius as are her long artistic fingers! DH is away from first week in June for 4 weeks I think, though he's hoping he can come home after the second round rather than having to stay for the quarter finals too.

SL What happens if you just leave the bowl of food in front of him? We've done baby-led weaning so DD feeds herself completely but it is definitely the messy route! She does love spoon feeding herself her porridge in the morning though generally she uses her hands.