Discussion amongst Mums with babies born in December 2008

[Veggiemummy]

Hope you all can find it, Moms title was perfect I thought.

Urbance hasn't even been on FB for over a month hope she's ok.

Spoke to Bisou on our FB group - she forgets to log on here and we were chatting about switching over to using FB group instead of MN if we could sway the few who don't use it to sign up but guess it's not likely

Hi Trace, I quite like Urbance. On the boob front, just let them settle themselves if they become sore give them a massage in a hot shower.

I am really shattered tonight DS2 & I had a big day, lots of walking. Did some shopping for a friend who just had a baby. She was DS1's midwife and everything was quite bad for the pregnancy lots of high BPs and her baby had to be born at 35weeks. Anyway she hasn't been able to BF which she is quite gutted about. So I found a really cool baby bottle. It's a designer one which has a really cool design on it that looks a bit like a heart tattoo. She's a bit of a goth at heart so I think she'll like it. Poor thing she has helped so many women have lovely homebirths and to BF their babies but she wasn't able to have the same experience herself. Anyway the bottle is really cool.

Aubs that's brilliant about the school.

Beans, I have to say DH would consider your DHs dream quite raunchy.

Kiwi I'm so jealous of your DH. I wonder if he is covering any of the Australian games. I think the extra day off is a brilliant idea.

DH was just away for the day in Copenhagen was back by 9 which is late for him but not too bad. He's in Arnhen tomorrow which is a bummer as that's another long day but then he's home Thursday and then it's easter hooray. We have some friends coming for Easter from London which is exciting. They are staying in London for a day then coming down to us on Saturday. DS1 is so pleased as their son is 9 months older than him and has always been the amazing older boy to AK. They are great friends. I think AK wants to show off his cycling skills.

Aubi that is amazing of DD on the phone. DS2 gets quite baffled when he hears a voice actually coming from the phone as usually he just holds it to his ear and yabbers into it, much like his mother. He does have a new quite worrying party trick. He's got a little tykes climbing cube thing with a slide on it. If he stands on it he can reach the Hamster cage and stick his fingers in, and Emily the Hamster can be a but bitey (it's her Rat heritage). So we always make sure the cube is well away from the cage. However, DS2 can now move the cube around the room, and has taken to pushing it over to the cage. Cheeky beggar can't take my eyes off him. He also managed to find a match and chew the top off today!

Oh gotta go he's up again. Trace your day rounds busy tomorrow so no coffee then.

trace - gosh, sounds like the perfect end to bf! i'm sure there are some ladies on here who can recommend how to help the boobs cope with stopping. hope tomorrow goes well.

katie - great letter - hope they respond well

ladyt - yay for telling people in RL! so tempted to tell one of our mutual friends (MCS) when i saw her a while ago, but of course kept schtumm. i wouldn't do that.

rubs - what a tricky situation - and how difficult to deal with it at such a distance.

beans - i second rubs in giving your dh a bit of a kick in the arse about not appreciating you on his return. hurrrumph!

aub - lovely phonecall!

how are people coping with the clock change? the night of the change she did her best sleep ever - 11.5 hours. since then, however, it has been screamaclock at bedtime for an hour (until her old bedtime iyswim). and this morning she woke with a ginormous poo at 4am, then came into our bed, fed and eventually fell asleep until 8.45 SHOCK HORROR!!! and tonight she also did a poo just after we put her to bed - anyone else have these random poos after months of no poos at night?

oh, and i spent the day with my lovely friend who had her baby a week ago - her dp had to go into work, so madam and i went over and spent the day with them. they have a cat, though, and while madam finds him delightful, the feeling is not mutual and after a little bit too much interest, the cat eventually took a swipe and caught madam's face - not bad at all, could have been loads worse, but drew some blood. poor lamb.

for those of you with cats - how do you cope with a newborn and a cat?

oh, and aubi - forgot to say great news on the school!

Hi WG. It's only happened once but DS2 did a random night time poo a couple of weeks ago.

Forgot to say. DS1 reported today that the bully boy was doing things to make him laugh today so that is good. Also his little friend is speaking to him more in Dutch which he was happy about. He is really keen to speak & understand Dutch as he knows if he wants to join a football team when he turns 5 he will need to know more Dutch.

Hi lovelies.

Been lurking a wee bit.

Aub how lovely of your DD2. I have decided that DS2 is saying mama it sounds a bit like amamama so am going with mama.

Lady poor DD when we had the D&V thing the other week I gave the boys dioralyte rehydration sachets they taste a bit vile but they do the trick.

Rubes cant possibly imagine what it must be like for you all I dont know the ins and outs but sending you some strength to deal with your DB and his problems.

Beans please dont worry about loving your No.2 I too felt a bit unsure about it but can honestly say that the overwhelming anamalistic feeling was there immedialty he was born just like with DS1.

Kiwi I would say crack on with a spa day on that 5th day every week on June you deserve it.

Forgotton loads but just wanted to pop my head in and say hello.

Oh and thanks for the dummy advice we are now 2 weeks in and he is fine. For the first time ever he is sleeping through if he wakes he self settles really quickly and after the first few days of grumpiness when he couldnt have a wee suck on it when tired he is now fine and just has a quick cuddle. Although his placid side appears to have disappeared and he is now a raving lunatic whose favourite pastime is climbing onto the windowsills using variours precarious climbing implements.

Off to Scotland to visit the rellies on Thursday so I may be around a fair bit if DH drives I can mumsnet all day. Yippee.

Aarrgghh missed loads of posts while trying to catch up.

Poor Madam. So nice of you to go over how is she, is this the lady who needed a C-section?

We had a cat in Derby when DS2 was born. He put up with a lot from DS1 and took a couple of swipes and would quite happily scratch DH & I if the mood took him but surprisingly he only once scratched DS2. Believe me DS2 did enough to deserve a swipe as he was very interested in Leo, at expressed that interest in ways Leo wasn't happy with but he would either walk away or would swipe but without claws so he would sort of tap DS2.

Hi Jam. I think DS2 calls me 'nya nya' ???

Hi, I am just running in to say thanks Veggie for the facebook info, I will send you a friend request and my initials are SL, if you look at my profile you will see a pic of the two boys Perhaps I will be able to keep up better then !

Just a few things I do remember, Katie I thought your letter was excellent, concise and fair. Hopefully the response will be so too. I'm not sure I could be so measured if it was my DS1. Beans you will love DC2 just as much, its just hard to imagine before they are here. And then when they are here, you cant imagine life without them. I have a different relationship with both of mine, and perhaps less intense with DC2 than with DC1 but special with both of them. But what you also cant imagine is how great they can be for eachother ! I felt guilty that I was depriving DC1 of our attention and that DC2 would be deprived because he would never get the full attention that DC1 did. However, I was worried needlessly in that respect.

LadyT I was shy about telling people about my second pregnancy. Its difficult to drop into conversation and impossible to hide for as long as with the first !

I'm sure I've missed loads, sorry !

WG- hello you sound a little more chipper - are you feeling a bit better these days?
ds weirdly didn't really flinch with the time change - infact day of the change he slept till 8 (so real 7 which is normal) and ever since he has been not napping for very long so gone to bed fine at the new 7pm. How on earth does he know it is 7 in the morning though when that used to be 6? Guess he just takes his 12 hrs and that is that fingers crossed it sticks

Thanks Jam - oh and so pleased about the dummy thing. When I ditched it at 6 months ds slept through from then so clearly he was only waking when he used to lose his flippin dummy. Ditching it, plus discovering the miracle blanket were life savers for me - I'm totally banking on the miracle blanket next time around but bet it goes tits up!

Where's Syb?

I really should gravitate towards the bedroom to try and get to sleep watch TV there

Trace, that is so nice of you to ask but I am fine - deffo just being feeble, honest! Anyway, I have phoned the electrician so big gold star. I am not surprised you find it confusing when you say something to L and then she tries to nag you out of your decision and you don't know what to do. I think I spent my entire childhood trying to wheedle at my mother to let me have my own way. She usually gave in but I don't think it has turned me into Napoleon

I'm loving the clock change WG, as DD had started waking at 7ish instead of 8ish, but now we are back to more like 8. I think MCS will be at the wedding that Aubi and I are off to in Sweden at the end of May. Hm, wonder if she is taking her DC...How nice to spend the day with your friend who has had the new babe. Keep ol' Judgeypants away from her.

Glad you are having more peaceful nights, Jam. And yay to the trip to Scotland - long drive though!

NJAN, I hated telling people about my first pregnancy as well. It's just a thing with me, I think. Ah well. Maybe I will leave it to when I am obviously pregnant and just murmur "Oh...I thought I'd mentioned it..."

Veggie, commuting to Copenhagen is pretty cool, I have to say (but sounds awfully tiring)

Oh, anyone have any experience of UCH? That's where my friend who is having a baby almost the same time as me is having it. I dimly remember someone on here saying it wasn't that good? I'm not going to tell her that, it wouldn't be fair. But I'm quite interested in London hospitals.

Watching One Born on C4+1. DP is engrossed in his work.

Morning ladies. I'm just sitting down to a coffee, walked DS1 to school and stopped at a bakkerie (see my Dutch is improving) for a crosant (not spelt wrong, Dutch) on the way home so just having that nu with my coffie. Jordi is already down for his nap he was wiggling and whining on & off from 3.30 this morning so must be the teeth I think. He's also quite cuddly and clingy lately which could be teeth but also I realised just as I was putting him down to sleep that I haven't just sat and cuddle him much lately. We used to spend ages together at home or out on the sling cuddling but recently we've been out a bit and he's been in the pushchair so when I pick DS1 up today I'm going sling DS2.

DS1 has school photos today, I bought him a new shirt for the occassion and he looked so smart and was so pleased with himself. He doesn't have many proper shirts (due in part to my lack of ironing, we all
live in T-shirts) it's a shorts sleaved one and I put a long sleeve top underneath to match it, he looked so cool.

Lady I think I understand your feebleness it comes of not getting out there as much and mixing with small people a lot I think. I'm quite an outgoing person but I have a shy streak and that has really come out since I had the DSs. I tend to get DH to do any official interaction which is silly because I'm at home all the time so I should do it but I just feel a bit, I don't know, shy is all I can describe it as. It's stupid if I had to go right now and work on a ward I would be fine with that but everyday interactions leave me feeling a bit silly.

Bless DH he bought me a Glamour and marie claire mag from the airport. He also bought DS1 a packet of m&ms he went into him last night and showed him and DS1 was so excited he slept with them. They were next to him on his pillow this morning. Anyway I'm going to enjoy my coffee and read these mags.

NJAN I've accepted you and will introduce you to the other ladies when I'm on the laptop.

Hooray for the mags! And enjoy your coffee, I think I am going to have another one in a minute.

Trulio, I really do not have a problem with shyness I just didn't want to call her electrician as I have know him for years (but not well) and getting him down for a quote is a big favour as it would be a 120 mile round trip, and I knew he would probably feel obliged and I sort of felt bad. As it is, he is going to come down and have a look but probably doesn't fancy doing it as he would have to do it at weekends, and I don't think he is keen.

Taking DD to a toddler music group this afternoon. I have got many other things to do but she will love it and I must try not to be selfish.

That's lovely about the chocs Veggie.

Jam: yay for sleeping through!

I think I may have to get ds2 a walker thing, he keeps pushing a stool around as a walker! Not overly safe.

DS2 is sitting next to me eating an apple. It's so simple but so lovely to see after having one boy who refused fruit outright to one who can't get enough of it.

Bloomin' hell you lot talk.
DH has been away with work for 2 days and now he has come back and he is ill!! Arghghgh, I am knackered with doing everything (though he did help me this morning) as well as both ends of nursery pick ups.
I know I am going to get this lurgy for the bank holiday weekend. Argh, and we are going to his mum's. Oh joy! And it's meant to rain. 3 days of sitting around or taking the dog for a walk in the rain. And steering DS away from the dog.

Sorry for moaning, whinge whinge whinge!!

Oh I was the same with first pregnancy, I didn't like telling people either. It took me 10 minutes to convince my good friend at work I wasn't joking!! And another good friend of mine said "Presumably this is a happy accident!?" - yikes they must not think much of my mothering instinct.

Oh speaking of mothering instinct am I the only person who didn't feel an overwhelming love for their baby when they first saw them? My first thought was "Oh shit, it really is a baby!" and then "oh, it's so small" and then "Oh shit, how am I going to breastfeed him, his mouth is tiny!". I thought he was cute, but just no overwhelming mothering instinct or anything. Maybe it was the CS or maybe I am just heartless!

That's a shame he probably won't do the work but at least you'll get an idea of what it should cost. Also he may know somebody who would do the work closer to you. Do electricians network?

Nope, I didn't feel overwhelming love for DD until about Day 3. When she first came out and they peeped her over the drape I just thought "Oh dear, who on earth is THAT? She looks nothing like I imagined or like no one I know, let alone am related to". I know that sounds terrible but it's the truth. And for the first couple of days when DP was cooing over her for hours on end I felt no connection with her to speak of. I think I might feel differently this time though. Last time it was partly shock, but this time I know what's in store. Also, I am far more disposed to tiny babies than I was before!

I don't think they do Veg, but I know he will tell me what it SHOULD cost and he may be able to recommend a mate who will do it. As it will be cheaper to get someone from the Midlands and pay for their accommodation than it would to get a local Cotswolds one as they evidently charge inflated prices.

SL I loved DS1 while he was still in my tummy, so I fell head over heals for him when I first saw him. DS2 I def felt something when i saw him but I gradually fell in love with him it wasn't an instant surge like with DS1. There is some involvement from hormones doing what they should etc but I also wonder if it's like with guys. Some of us may have had an instant spark with our DP/DHs where with others it may have been something that developed over time.

Oh and at least you can take heart in the fact that we will enjoy your MIL stories on Tuesday even if you don't enjoy the weekend.

Summer - I don't know how to compare the overwhelming love for the newborn - I just think everyone is different. I had a very nurturing protective instinct immediately, but not sure how much is the same. I also had the same 'oh shit' reaction! and because he didn't do much and didn't really have much personality to speak of at first, it was kind of like having a little pet at first The feeling has def grown considerably. Although he is no longer a pet to me, I have a stupidly almost obsessive over the top protective / loving feeling these days! I'm assuming it's normal though

I have shampooed the rug thismorning - thanks Effie you reminded me it needed doing. The dog is def not shedding at the moment as there was considerably less hair, but the water still came out black Might even do the vomit stain upstairs when ds wakes up!

Veggie - very very cute about the M&M's and you have such a thoughtful dh - thumbs up to MrVeg.

Still nothing from my db although i've not tried to msg him. His dp may have heard but she hasn't contacted me so not sure.

This weather still sux doesn't it.
I need to make a dentist appointment while it's free. Do they do Sat appointments?

Aahhh Midlanders, good people.

Oh and I do remember with DS2 a couple of hours after he was born and the midwife had gone home and I was by myself upstairs changing his nappy. I looked down at his sweet little body and his cute little butt and thought 'oh God I've got to do all this again!'. He may have picked up on my feeling then as he has hated having his nappy changed ever since.

But now as I watch him pour his bucket of blocks over his head (the only time he ever uses building blocks is when he has those developmental checks) and laugh out load at himself I think he's the loveliest little baby man.

Oh and I second the extra attention from sibling thing for the second babies. DS1 got loads of attention from me, which I don't get to give to DS2. However, DS1 never had a big brother to give him attention and little boys love big kids so it us such a great thing for DS2. Now I actually feel sad for DS1 not having a big brother.

I bet you brother's gf would have been in touch if she'd heard from him. I should think he is just gathering his thoughts. I'm sure you'll hear from him over Easter. Fingers crossed.

Thing is, Veggie, when I was carrying DD I felt as if I could almost read her mind. But somehow, when I had her...it all took a few days to kick in. But hey! I adore her now. Not too worried about DC2 because I feel reassured that, even if I don't feel loads immediately, I know I will in time. I'm looking forward to having a tiny baby again.