December 2007 - Not Quite Two, Already Terrible ;)

[claraquack]

Just checking that this worked....

Congrats again arcadie

Happy birthday buzzy's dd1

Guess how I am spending my birthday? Clearing up sick . dd now. Had been really brave and invited people to mine for drinks this eve but have had to cancel.

Maybe I don't want any more dc afterall My jaw is killing me from where I've been so tense with the dc sick, I haven't really slept in a week where I've been listening out for them and my stomach is all knotty...can't imagine having to deal with 3 or 4 dc worth of vomit!

Skid both of mine had dummies due to constant sucking, dd I felt v guilty but with ds I didn't really think about it. And both only slept on me to begin with, dd stopped quite early on, ds was nearly two quite a bit older. If he is lying on his baby gym then that's a good sign I reckon, ds wouldn't be put down EVER. DD sounds v sweet with him Hope ds1 is better soon, I'm feeling sorry for myself for having poorly dc and I haven't even got a newborn to cope with!

Well we are in the lake distruct having a fab time. Climbed Catbells -dd3 cried most of the way being too cold..sigh normally we are so careful about having the right clothes..oh well poor Evie!!!!

Girls are very tired though!

bump has suddenly grown in the last wee I have gone froma bit fat but could fit in to most clothes to very pregnant no way will fit into anything without elasticated waistbands ... I really am about the same size as I was with dd3 at 7-8 months ...its put me right off my easter eggs

Cazzy - at you climbing mountains with toddlers AND pregnant! I am very excited that there is another baby to look forward to though now that Skid and Arcadie have had theirs. I have to live the little part of my life that would love to have another baby vicarously through others....

Clairey - that really does sound tough, poor you. I hope you get some proper sleep soon. How are you doing emotionally? are you getting good support?

Buzzy - thanks for the info on the cough etc. We also use antihistimine from time to time and it does seem to help. We'll see what happens when we change environment when we go up to Florida in a few weeks time. Oh, and I will hold your breath for you regarding your exH, here's hoping things can only get better (wasn't that a song?)

Beckle - thanks for asking about my friend. It's such a dreadful story and I have become very involved so it's become quite stressful but she is away for a while at the moment so I can relax a bit. When both she and I are back from our respective trips I am really, really hoping she keeps her resolve to leave him. We've agreed a date as she will need me and my dh's help, it's really awful being so far from home and support - it makes you really appreciate social services, women's aid, nhs, the benefit system etc. She basically has to escape from him without him knowing, including taking money from their joint account on the day they leave in case he finds out.

Arcadie - I hope the feeding is getting better, and that you manage to get some sleep!

Oh and Happy easter everyone! We had a little hunt this morning with the dd's and some friends, they loved it! Had to do it in a room with the air conditioning on though to stop the eggs from melting.....

Lake District sounds good Cazzy And yay for properly pregnant! I saw a lady with 4 dd's in tow, about the same ages as your 3 are now then the baby, made me think of you . Are you finding out the sex? Either would be lovely IMO.

Clara thanks for asking, I think I was feeling a bit alone tbh with noone to share the worry of them being ill with as well as being worn out by it. My friend came for the weekend (dd was sick wed night and then not again til after friend arrived on friday night so I thought it would be ok) and did look after me a little bit by cooking dinner on sat and washing dishes etc but then I also felt guilty that she'd come all this way and was exposed to a vomiting child and we couldn't really do anything all weekend so in a way that was more stress (though lovely to see her!).

H useless as ever, I asked him to sit with dd for a couple of hours on sat afternoon so we could get out of the house and he was really moody about it and acted like I was out of line for asking, he did it but dd was really upset when we got back because he'd been angry with her and then he asked me to give him a bottle of wine "as payment" (for looking after his own child ])

Well yesterday Evie fell off a log with quite a clunk ..I think she is fine but her shoulder is very sore - but no bruising or bones sticking out at off angles. But she does't like it being touched .. srill she is moving her arm fine so I don't think she has broken anything just it is a bit sore... oh wel!!!

No I am not finding out what it is until it is born - it is cheating !!!!!

Oh poor Evie! Hope she is okay.

Hope everyone had a good Easter weekend, pity the weather was so bloody awful

I wanted to hang the washing out but then realised I hadn't bought new clothes pegs (last lot kept breaking then got knocked into muddy puddle by the cat!). So of course I bought some and today it is pissing it down grrrr!

Still no viewings

Clairey, you have my deepest sympathy re prattish behavious of the ex. Unfortunately its par for the course and you have to train yourself to put up with this sort of stuff as the alternative is probably worse. I shy away from conflict and over the years this has allowed ex to get away with all sorts of rubbish behaviour. I'm not proud of that either as I vowed I'd always stamp on that sort of thing in DD's best interests but it is and remains hard work. So be proud of yourself!

Oh no cazzy, poor Evie!

Anyone else's 2 yos into quite aggressive behaviour at the moment? Not so much tantrums and pushing and hitting and loads of "NO!"? I found it rather wearying over the long weekend - especially as DD1 finds it funny to tease DD2, queue even more screaming!

Clara, all tense for your friend. Hope she makes the escape OK.

Took dog out for short walk late last night before bed and fell into a gutter, major face plant - bit of a grazed knee but no major damage thankfully.

buzzy dd's new favourite phrase is: 'no mummy i don't want to at all'.
cute the first time, but after 12 hours somewhat tiring...

I wish we could get all the 2 yo's together in a room, it would be so funny. I bet they are all doing the same sort of things - dd2 currently likes the phrases "I can't do it", "I can't remember" "I don't know" etc. She is pretty negative! Actually she is pretty hard work all round. I wouldn't say aggressive as she is very good natured but she has reached that frustrating stage of wanting to do everything for herself which means it all takes forever.

Sorry I am not making much sense. Both dd's are awake every night at the moment. At about ten past 5 this morning I ended up curled up in dd2's tiny toddler bed, with her pint-sized quilt cover wrapped around us, trying to get her back to sleep after yet another coughing fit.

Anyway. Clairey - I'm really sorry you are finding it tough (of course you are!). I think when you are in a difficult relationship like you were, it's easy to focus on getting away from it, thinking it'll be easier. Well in one way I am sure it is but suddenly being on your own with two such small childen is always going to be hard. AT least you have Buzzy to give you good advice and sympathy...I had three weeks on my own in Oct 08 and that was enough for me. Hats off to all single mums!

BT - sorry no viewings. Do you have to sell or can you rent the house out? Although that brings a lot of it's own problems, just had another email from our rental company in the UK about a leak.....

Have to sell unfortunately, don't think rental would be an option for us as our LTV is too high, and our current mortgage payments are much higher than we would be able to get for rent. We are still in a tie-in period at this time.

DS seems to fear other 2 yo, hats them coming anywhere near them and will runaway. For some reason prefers bigger kids!

Evie is so agressive - she hits (the other 2 never hit), she pulls hair, she cries, screams and tantrums ... it is all a bit of a shock

but her rib she is bothering her - she doesn'tl ike being picked up

Hope Evie is feeling better soon cazzy.

We're definitely into autumn here now - cold mornings and only getting up to 18 or 19 during the day. Still nice though, long may it last - not looking forward to winter. Getting my flu jab on April 20.

Bea seems to have given up on what I'd describe as tantrums - i.e. crying and screaming. Instead we just get incredible stroppiness, pushing, hitting, kicking, even biting to my horror. Not all the time but enough that it is wearying. And Isobel is rather sick of it too unsurprisingly (although at the same time she frequently baits her). I try to get them to sort out disputes without my intervention but in the end it seems to often be necessary to physically separate them...any other strategy ideas welcome!

Hi All - we're a week into 3 DCs here and it is truly hard work (and that's WITH my mum here - goodness only knows what it'll be like nest week)

Cazzy DD also quite aggressive - I tell myself it's because she's learned from DS...
Oh and the tantrums....

Dundee LOVE the new phrase. DD's is "I do it MYself" or "Dat MINE" (everything currently hers) or most often "I cuggle baby. mmmmmwah"

arcadie it gets easier I promise ds3 is almost 10months and I now undersatnd why I have such small age gaps, he's sleeping, being cute, baby signing and I'm really broody.

good news on the house front for us, we have been offered a mortgage so can now go back with a sensible offer, only one step forward but feel like if we are meant to have it it will happen, the mortgage was the biggest hurdle

clairey hows ds doing? hope he's better and you've been enjoying the amazing weather today - I'm so glad I can kick the boys out into the garden at the moment and they just crash at the end of the day.

beckle how are things going for you? how was your scan?

skid don't feel guilty about the dummy its a life saver! ds1 had it for less than 10 wks, ds2 6 months, ds3 still has it occasionally (10 months)... we tried to get rid of it over Easter but sometimes its much less stressful to give in when dealing with the other two, my Mum has strong opinions about it and is very disapproving do what gets you through!

cazzy hows evie doing? hope she's on the mend

We're doing ok on the tratrum front, Toby doesn't really do a good line in tantrums and anything he trys is actually pretty easy to ignore we are just getting into the weird sleep stuff we had with ds1 tho ie finding him asleep on floor, him waking up distraught because he can't find pillow and I find covers and everything all over floor, playing quite happily using torch at 2am - hopefully he grows out of it quicker than ds1! its not a huge issue but I feel like I'm sleeping lighter to keep an ear out for him

Anyway this weather is awesome, been on bikes today and visited my mum and dad who are camping nearby,brilliant day

Hello ladies, happy belated Easter (and New Year, and Xmas...)

Just marking my place - will try to read back as far as I can tonight - just "met" Clairey on another thread and realised how much I missed this!

DD was 2 on the 9th Dec - a crazy little lady, full of chat and trouble!

Hope you are all well!

hi caz!

Helloooo!

Have had a v v quick scan and there seem to be LOTS of new babies, congratulations everyone!! Am I the only one whose Dec 07 baby was their first who hasn't had another?? Oh help. This is my current dilemma...main problem being DH and I would have to actually sleep together for it to happen...long story... (and possibly TMI for my 1st return post?! )

Clairey I am gathering that you and DH are separating, sorry to hear that but I'm sure it is for the best, hope you are doing ok!

BT our house is up for sale too - a few viewers but hardly a rush on it...frustrating isn't it?

DD...

• not potty trained - hoping to leave it till the summer!
• lots of chat - and definitely very keen on the "MINE" "you can't do that mummy" "I do it mYSELF" "I NOT share" etc etc type of statements! But also gorgeously imaginative, we have several imaginary friends, she loves her toys and makes them speak to each other etc.
• still feeding her morning and night - again, is that just me then?

Going back to read some more!!

hi caz! and welcome back - you are not the only one still BF I don't think - BT and maybe cazzy, not sure about anyone else...? I am BF but not DS1 anymore but his little tiny brother - sorry to hear about problems with DH (I assume it is a problem?) - feel free to share!

arcadie - DS2 is only 6 weeks and I am ALREADY finding it MASSIVELY easier having three than I did at your stage - hang on in there - they are so demanding in the first few weeks but it really does get easier

insy - great news re mortgage - sounds like everything is going really well for you after a tough few months after DS3 was born (secretly longing to be at your stage when my DS2 is sleeping more and life is hopefully slightly less hectic)

sympathies re tantrummy toddlers - I have been fairly lucky with DS1 but my God did I suffer with DD - she had about 5 full-on tantrums a day from age 2 until 3.5 - she's an absolute angel now though (discunting the tantrum she just threw because she didn't get a get well soon card like her brother although she hasn't been ill...)

DS1 has been really ill this last week and a half - temp of 40 or 41, didn't eat anything at all for 9 days, completely listless and unresponsive - it was AWFUL. However they finally (after 3 visits to the GP) diagnosed him with a chest infection and he is FINALLY on the mend. Feel like I can tackle anything now that I have coped with him, DD and a newborn!

Thanks for all the reassuring comments about dummies btw - am now trying to wean him off them as he doesn't seem to have the same need for sucking anymore... but feel more relaxed about using them now if he does want than so thank you

Skid - glad to hear it's getting easier. I still can't imagine having a newborn as well as a 2 and 4-yr old, but it's also amazing how you adapt! It's a bit like when I learned shorthand (stick with this story, it is relevant, really!) in order to get you to 100 words per min they used to give us short bursts at 110 and even 120 a min. So when we went back to 100 wpm suddenly it seemed easy in comparison.

I guess what I am trying to say in if you went back to having two I bet you'd find it easy!

Caz - welcome back. Sorry to hear there are "issues" with your DH, hope it's getting sorted! As Skid says I think BT is still bf'ing so you're not alone and should feel damn proud of yourself as well. Your lucky dd.

I'm just getting over excited at the moment because we're off to Disney in exactly 2 weeks time!!!!!! Although I am also very nervous that it will be a total disaster and dd2 will be terrified of all the characters.....

caz dd1 still our 1 and only - and going to be for a very, very long time (if I have anything to do with it ).
can i just say that i think it is unbelievably cool that you are still bf. i miss it still (though wouldn't have believed it when dd was newborn!)...

Evening all!

BF - I have no idea how/why we are still doing it - it is now just morning and night and is really part of a routine - very, very rarely does she ask for it during the day and if she does, tbh it depends on who I am with whether I say yes or whether I distract her with some food!

But thank you dundeemarmalade, it is nice to be unbelievable cool rather than unbelievably freaky!

I haven't read back through the thread yet so MASSIVE apologies if DD is not your one and only through choice, but i'm getting from your most recent post that that is not the case!! So do you mind if I ask why?! I am really, really torn on this, lack of the required activities aside, I don't know if I want a dc2 only because everyone else seems to think I should!

DrSkidaddle (congrats on the Dr part by the way!!) that sounds scary with your ds1, how is he today?

caz - was talking to my friend about age gaps the other day, she now has 4 (well expecting no 4 any day now) and has 4yrs then 6yrs and now 3 yrs between hers, she said she felt like you that everyone was popping out no 2 and asking when she would have another and she didn't feel ready at all till ds1 was about to start school. Another mum I now has been agnonising about it since her dd was about 2 and now she is 4 decided that the moment has passed and things are just great how they are. I guess what I'm trying to say is that different gaps (or not) suit everyone, just think of a suitable vage, comical or uncomfortable remark to say to people in the mentime whilst you decide, people always say such stupid things its good to have a come back. I often get asked if all mine were planned which (1) they were and (2) is a bit like asking someone with 1 child if they had difficulty conceiving...

skid - things going v well (hopefully won't jinx it now I've said that!) think thats why I usually get pregnant when youngest is 9 months old, feels like everything is more than managable
Hope ds1 is doing ok, know what you mean about having them ill and once they're ok it feels so much easier, clara is right you would find 2 a doddle now

On a 'not having any more babies for a little while note' has anyone had the coil fitted? (I've probably asked this before) I had one put in about a month a go and its been both good and bad, I had infection at beginning and now its not uncomfortable but I'm still bleeding on and off, is best contraception I know because dh and I have only had sex twice since it was fitted not feeling great about it but can't think of a better alternative! anyone had one and been ok with it? I just wondered if things take a while to settle down...

Insy - sorry can't help you with the coil, I looked into it and just thought "no" - what with sweeps and smears, I've had enough of people "fiddling" up there!! Unfortunately our solution (vesectomy) probably isn't for you if you haven't decided whether you want a fourth or not - but it's been great for us, not having to worry about contraception any more.

caz - don't feel pressurised into having a 2nd if you don't want to. I was close to sticking at one, in many ways it makes life a lot easier and sometimes I am a little envious of those perfect little families with their one perfectly behaved little girl (it always seems to be girls for some reason), they look so relaxed!!! A friend of mine is about to have her 2nd, her first is about to start school. I don't think she decided for a while.

Caz10 - yes fellow freak extended breastfeeder her

You are doing well, I have got DS down to 3 feeds a day. There are times I get really irritated by it, especially when he swaps from boob to boob about 5 times but I am feeling better about it now I have got his feeding frequency down. I really do want him to stop when he is ready and he is not quite there yet. Plus his little face is so sweet when he is feeding

DH and I are probably going to start trying for dc2 in a couple of months. I honestly can't see us moving any time soon, and I don't want to put everything on hold until we do. DS is still not ready for potty training, I have bough a copy of "Potty Training for boys" and it gives a list of signs that boys are ready, and he doesn't exhibit any of them! Just a bit worried that when he decides he is ready, will be when we are about to move