January 2008 Shiny New Year Toddlers - Toddling, tempers and tantrums

[madmouse]

ok then, thought it sounded better this way round.

hope everyone finds it!

Gingeme - No they are very good at creche and only give her what I have put in bag and they chop up fruit for all the LOs (there are 5 babies altogether)

Oh well hopefully a good nights sleep will help her

Only going to the keep fight class as its something to do and get to see all my friends but i guess its as good a reason as any

Lilyloo - Did you get all the toothpaste out of your carpet??

LaT - Sabela will be walking before you know it!!

Madmouse - Hope you are ok hun?

JKS hope all goes well tom will be thinking of you.

Simps poor Molly hope she feeling better tom.

Well done Sabela!!!

No my carpet is now cream with pink splodges

Gingeme am struggling with the diet tonight as could really enjoy a couple glasses wine. Had rubbish day with L. She is so ready for school and the constant battles have wore me down today.

Hope everyone else ok!

Lilyloo - Is L starting full time school in Sept?

Simpson - as good a reason as any! used to go to all sorts of random exercise classes as an excuse to get out - now just go to toddler groups, how times have changed

poor M is she ok/still asleep now?

are you sure your MIL hasn't been 'sidelining' her some chocolate/yoghurt?

Madmouse, Gingeme - thanks

I can try and kid myself that it might just be wonderful efficiency wanting to tell us that nothing is the matter (even though i know someting is) but if we're all honest, something is going on and we need to get to the bottom of it and deal with it.

once someone says 'H has X' we have to deal with it, whatever X might be.

he has something going on, he's not right, and we have to fix it.

so, deep breath and rescue remedy (nearly run out!) and see what they say.....

Good luck tom JKS

No don't think MIL has given M anything (maybe J though ) although she has never been sick with it before....

Only 5 more days till she goes

Simps yes and that day needs to come real soon

JKS i guess you have to just take it a step at a time. Only a week ago life was all normal.

i still have stuff in the fridge that i look at and think 'when i bought that H was fine' and so on...

going to do lots of gardening with T tomorrow morning when H naps to take our minds off things, then find out what's going on hopefully.

should be in bed now really, off soon.

Try and have a good nights rest if not sleep JKS.
At least tom the guessing stops and you know what you are dealing with.
Give H an extra hug from us x

JKS - I know that 'before' and 'after' feeling very well. Wishing you all the best tomorrow.

Simpson - that sounds like a very trying day.

Sorry for no more personals but I need your help with a dilemma.

You know we were trying for another baby. Well, I'm not pg yet and we're wondering whether to keep trying. At the moment we're just sort of leaving it up to God but this is the situation:

• last time I got pg I was housebound from week 8-9 to week 29 and ill all the way through

• Some studies say I have a 75% chance of getting it again; some say I've got double the statistical chances of anyone else - I think about 15%

• My dad may live between 6 months and a year - we hope more of course.

• I really don't want to be unable to see my dad (who live 9 hours by train away from us) because I'm ill while pg. It would be torture for me.

• We really want to have three babies and I'm now 35 and so really don't want to put off the next baby indefinitely.

What would you do? Tough one, I know (believe me)!

p.s. my first instinct was 'let's stop trying' followed shortly by me jumping on DH and insisting on my wicked way

I am confused!

JKS - big hugs hon, whatever happens he is still the same Henry - and that walking is bril!

LaT I would be tempted to say don't change anything, whatever you decide you may regret something else. You could get pg, have no problems and be able to show your dad a second grandchild.

Morning all, let's see what today brings

LaT - I would say you might not get so ill next time. And, when you have one to look after anyway you are going to be getting on with things more, even if you feel rough. And you will want to see your dad so that will get you through the journeys - they might be fun but you'll manage.
So i would seem to be saying go for it

It might not even happen for a bit too.

You don't want to be full of regrets later on in life about something you didn't do.

So, MIL was up at 4am, flushed the loo, coughing and spluttering (she's allergic to the cats) and blowing her nose really loudly.
Woke T. put him back in bed twice.
Kept me awake for hours too.

Then H coughing at 5.30ish but went back to sleep.
then all up at 7.15.

Then i tell mil about T being up 'oh, what woke him up?'
;i don't know' i say as i don't want to bother her.
'i was up lots in the night, hope my coughing didn't wake him'

what can you say? it's not her fault she's coughing.

Simps - how you getting on????
got your secret stash going yet?

JKS are you not back yet?? Blooming suspense!

Just checking in to see if any news about H.

LaT - what does your gut instinct tell you to do?

Well DD been ill all day and DH stayed at home with her (ulterior motive was to watch footie )

The rest of us went to oxford and had a nice time.

DD has had temp of 39.1 all day and has only just eaten her first bit of food since yesterday morning. 2 small pieces of salmon and 3 baby rice cakes

But at least it is something...

Hi, we're back.

his EEG was 'markedly abnormal'

he has epilepsy

they don't know why/what sort, etc and want to know so he will have an MRI soon.

unless he has another 'convulsive' fit he won't be medicated until after the mri when a specialist in great ormond street will look at the results and make a decision what would suit him best.

we could have started him on Epilim today but i didn't want to in case the GOSH specialist wants him on something else then he'd have to come off it and start something else.

if he has another convulsive fit anytime we are to let them know and he wills tart on the epilim straight away.

Once the specialist sees the files then we should be able to get more answers, like the likelihood of him growing out of it, the long term prognosis, etc.

Obv gutted, but would have been worried if they found nothing too.
The last urine test is testing for metabolic problems (eg whether he doesn't metabolise certain proteins properly) but that test take months.
The MRI will also look at the physical structure of the brain and tell us if there's something there causing it.
The consultant said they find out why the fits are happening in 70% of cases and they like to know why (even if it's something that's beyond our understanding iykwim).

sorry all me, but there you have it. i have an epileptic child and that's hard to say (Housemum - i hope i'm not upsetting you and maybe you can give me tips for the future).

I keep looking at his head and wondering what on earth is going on in there. and why.

so, generally but trying to keep a lid on things as i know once i give in and cry i'll bawl big time and with PIL & T here i don't want to do that.

JKS - big big hug and a shoulder to cry on anytime.

I am actually crying right now and that is a very rare thing. Epilepsy is my biggest fear with Nathan so I so so feel for you .

Don't be afraid to be upset now, the coping will come later.

And don't forget he is still Henry .

Must say as soon as he had fits I started to worry about his endless sleeping. I assume you have mentioned that too?

Thinking of you!

don't start me off MM!

yes i have mentioned his sleep pattern and it may be linked. a fit/seizure (of any sort) apparently increases blood flow to the brain x 4 and energy usage in the body x 3 which is why he was so tired after the big fits.
we have since worked out that he has the 'absence seizures' in clusters - he had a load at the appt which was handy. and is tired after them too.
so it is possible that he has been having minor unnoticeable seizures that have been making him so tired in the past but we haven't noticed them

JKS - ((hugs)) another person very upset here for you

Madmouse is right - it is still the same old Henry

If you need anything at all, you only have to ask...

Thanks Simps.

what i need is the impossible obv, to ask someone to make it all go away

have started a thread on here for advice and will see if i can find some other MNers in a similar boat.

PIL still here but they have to go home at some point and DH will have to go back to work.
there will be a point, prob Tues, when i'm on my own with the 2 boys again - and i have to get on with life - but then i think i will be wobbly.

Staying at home with friends round will be ok but trying to go anywhere - will have to brief other mums on what to do with H if he fits, and nursery. just can't face going through the story a hundred times and everyone being 'nice' to me. would prefer to curl up in a corner and sob hysterically.

DH meant to be going to PIL with ds1 next weekend for long awaited 'almost me time' dunno if that will happen.
Bermuda for brother's wedding in 7 weeks, dunno if that will happen.
anything/everything is - dunno what will happen about that.
even as far as schooling, how bad will he get, are we going to be talking Sn school, etc. all buzzing round in my head.

and, not an important thing really but...will we ttc no 3 when planned, will we even consider having more DC, will things degenerate and we need all our energies just for ds2 (& ds1 of course)?

wine not kicking in just yet

JKS you do know where the other mnetters with experience are don't you? don't be afraid, we don't bite!

epilepsy is no indication of needing special needs school. He is obviously developing well otherwise, and you may actually see a jump in his development when his meds kick in nd his fits decrease. based on epilepsy alone it will be a matter of teaching school to administer emergency med (he will probably have a med to take twice a day and one to give if he has an obvious fit, often midazolam).

I know very well the feeling of being scared to be alone, I was terrified first time dh went back to college, it takes a while but it does wear off and you get on with things.

PS I know you don't believe but I am asking for it all to go away...

have posted link to your thread on special needs asking some old hands to have a look.

Madmouse - thanks for linking to it.

btw i do believe, i just have doubts about the churchy bit, but believe me, i will take prayers. have been doing my fair share myself recently.
if only He would listen....

Sending one up for you and H from here too. So sorry that you have this diagnosis. I hope the news after the MRI is clearer and makes you feel more positive.

As far as his intellectual develpoment oges, I can only say anecdotally that I have known several PhD students / lecturers with epilepsy, so it's not necessarily any holdback there.

Thinking of you. I hope you get some good rest.