JUNE 2008- tantrums, shrieking and lashings of Gin (and that's just the mums!)

[pureeandpearls]

Thread number 123 or something like that

shouldn't you have some baby sick on your shoulder on honour of our FB club!

good point... I'm sure there is some around hte house I could use instead of fresh

Hmm, nice thought!!

Poppy he just follows me around all the time, suffers from fairly major separation anxiety which never happened with Edie and finding it quite exhausting hence the fact that he starts doing 5 mornings a week so that I can get some stuff done.

Hope your Edie enjoys the playgroup.

Hope it goes well Poppy. BTW did you go to Cambridge or am I misreading your post.

I went to work yesterday to see my boss.I had the same dilemma as to what to wear, so put a casual skirt on and a polo neck. I had snot on the jumper before I left the house! My boss commented that I shouldn't have got dressed up

So, the meeting itself was a bit of a trial. I had forgotten how she speaks in riddles in order to avoid answering questions. The short version is that redundancies are being made in her team but I am not affected and my old job is still there for me. Sounds like good news in theory, but in reality no-one was employed to do my job when I went on ML and my two direct reports have left and not been replaced. This suggests to me that my role isn't exactly essential, nor that it will be the same when I return.. On the pay review thing I also found out that some people got bonuses and some didn't, and some got pay rises and some didn't, so me getting a bonus and no pay rise is in the mix with everyone else. She couldn't give me any evidence for why the review was the way it was though. So now I just need to decide what I want to do when my ML is up.

oh how confusing Ali. One of the advantages of maternity leave though is that it is apparently really hard to make someone on maternity leave redundant and be legally safe about it, so who knows but it might have saved your job ....

OMG - we have a viewing on Saturday!!!!! You should see the state of the house, Birthday presents everywhere, baby toys everywhere AARGH, keep your fingers crossed, I know we'd be very lucky but it only takes one viewing sometimes!!

Fantastic news Deb will be keeping fingers crossed for you. Are they English or Austrian, is your MIL still there, will she be able to help?

great news deb 5 sorry to hear about that - sounds like a major pain (adds into the mix re my dh's theory that boys are more tricky than girls... )

ali that hardly sounds very inspiring re your work chat (and yes I did go to cambridge per my mil on the it is easier to get in if you're a girl ticket ).

work went well (even managed to do some baby free shopping)...think it will be good when I got back - had nice vibe (unlike my old team) and sitting/working with lots of people with families who understand what its like...Edie loved playgroup and seemed very happy (was really nice as got huge smile and wagging arms just like dh does when I came in) so hope it will be ok. I did miss her though ... had to check all my mobile phone photos of her on way in ..

systemsThat is true re benefits of ML.. I've had no issue re how I've been treated since on ML (maybe cos was dealing with new team)..its the bit before I have a beef with (Still wonder if I should have lodged a greivance but was tricky as was full of hormones and its so subjective plus would be dropping a so called "friend" in it).

Glad your day went well Poppy it is lovely when they beam and wave arms at you.

Is it just me or is anyone else still feeling the effects of the clocks changing at the weekend?

I'm ready to hit the hay now

oh deb! fingers crossed for you! A viewing is a positive sign, especially as they are probably more serious if they are willing to travel to your village (would be very unlikely they'd be local I'm guessing).

Yes I love unions, Sponge! Can you ask your brother when the revolution is going to start please?

Poppy at 'it must have been easier for girls to get in'. What are MILs like? I actually realise how good mine are when I hear these stories!!! Essie, your FIL sounds like a prat, but Ali could well be right. I felt all 'aw, bless' reading about your FIL Ali!

E has now pulled herself up to standing three times and I have missed it... three times! I fed T first at bedtime tonight (DH still at work) and left E in her cot sat up playing. When I came in she was stood up! I was so proud. So I sat her down to see if she would do it again but she wouldn't but that is the second time she did it today so I think tomorrow she'll do it even more. We only had a couple of minutes of screeching before going to sleep tonight (45 mins yesterday!)

Well I have had a great day, mostly thanks to not getting up till ten to nine! The DTs slept all night till then . I think the lost hour is still throwing them a bit. They were both in bed by 6.45pm tonight though so I don't think we'll have another lie-in like that tomorrow.

Poppy, glad work went OK. How was Edie with the nanny?

Ali, yeah ML probably saved your job (when you may have been happy being made redundant...?), I have heard of two teachers this week who went for deputy head jobs while on MN which they were no way qualified for (just wanted to show willing and really did not want the bother of being interviewed) but of course they both got interviews because employers are so scared of doing anything remotely discriminatory to someone on ML so just play safe. One of the women is still BFing and they want her to go in for full day interview (and gave her a day's notice )

I am thinking again of re-training to be a teacher (when all my kids are in school so not for a few years yet!), but it turned into a bit of an argument with DH when I said 'I could do one day a week supply and earn £200', I thought he would be happy but he just said 'why couldn't you work full-time?' and I was like, 'well it is not just 9-3.30, you have all the planning and marking to do and I'll have 3 or 4 kids to look after too.' He said 'well other people manage... every time we talk about you working it always seems to be how you can do less and less'! Cheeky git. He did apologise, he is a bit stressed at work. But he said ridiculous things like how we can't afford to do things that his peers at work can do (ie expensive cars and holidays or a bigger house, all of which we don't want anyway!) and that it is hard being the one who has to bust their balls at work while I have a ball at home with the kids (this is true). So it did make me think and I will be a bit more sensitive in future cos I am so happy and it is all down to his hard work. If he didn't work so hard I would not be able to pick and choose what I do work-wise. He loves his job but it is stressful and not as much fun as being at home! If I could make £800-ish a month though from a few days' work that would be great and would really take the pressure off. No way am I working full-time tho with four kids. He did apologise and said he was happy that I am so happy and didn't want me to work, but he is just worried a little that if he is the only one with a job then what happens if he lost his job or got ill and couldn't work? This is understandable but I don't worry about that. We would survive. Sorry that turned into a bit of a long story didn't it!

The teachers were on ML not MN!

Interesting the comments about it being hard to make those on ML redundant - don't know whether that is the case anymore. Amongst my ante-natal groups (both NCT and through my surgery), I know about 17 women on ML at the moment and of those FOUR have been made redundant in the last six months!

Don't think anyone is immune these days .

Ali, it is so hard to know what to do - I still don't know whether I've made the right decision, but then my situation is different cos I'll only be back 3 months . Would you consider going back, seeing whether you like it, and then making a decision?

poppy, good that your day went well .

Deb, fab news about the viewing - keeping everything crossed. If I win the lottery I'll buy your house - looks idyllic!

libra, sorry you're feeling so knackered .

Neenz, I like your plan! You may not actually find supply is all it's cracked up to be though - I hated it . What age/subject do you want to teach? What about being a TA, or is that not well paid enough? You would obviously have to do more days but guaranteed 9 - 3pm.

Yes, mil will still be here - thank goodness, my idea of tidy for a viewing and Nigel's is quite different. He will probably be wanting to leave home by the time of the viewing. The people coming are Dutch.

Neenz - sounds like you need to tread carefully with your dh re work, for a while.I found supply teaching very difficult, and without any job satisfaction. Are you interested in primary or secondary?

Keep buying those tickets then Sponge!! Looks like we have the same reaction to supply teaching!!

Interesting Deb, you're primary as well aren't you? My love of teaching came partly from the wonderful relationship I built with the kids - not something you can do with supply .

Hmm, maybe now is the time to confess that I don't actually play the lottery!!

Yes I was Primary too and I totally agree

Now seems like a good time to start doing the lottery!!

that is very true sponge..they can still get rid of you "nicely" (ie pay you off) but its still losing your job

Edie fine with the nanny - she is very considerate and tryign really hard to fit into what Edie wants/is used to so that is very helpful (plus E loves being at home so that helps).

Can you lend me a quid?!!

sorry, that was aimed at deb! poppy, so pleased your nanny is working out - that's one less thing to worry about

Just been talking to dh and reminded me I forgot to share my careless mummy moment .

Had lunch today with friends, and at the end of the meal I was drinking a cup of tea and had Alex sat on my lap. I had moved everything on the table out of his reach, but as I leant over to pick up something to my side, Alex jumped forward put his hand in my tea and pulled the whole thing on top of him .

I jumped out of my chair and screamed, scaring the crap out of him and making him cry. Luckily my friend is a nurse and hugely calm in these situations - she quickly ascertained that the tea wasn't that hot and took Alex's trousers off to ensure that the heat didn't stay on his legs. She then took Alex off me and made me sit down as she said I'd gone a v funny colour .

It's scary how these things can happen even when you think you're being soooo careful.

J not feeling well so very quick post. Fingers crossed for viewing Deb
Fantastic news Sponge I think 9 weeks has gone quite quickly!
Neenz I know I am very lucky that dh doesn't mind that I don't work so maybe your dh will get used to you not working too. It has been 7 years for me so it would odd for him if I go back now! It is much easier for him this way though - there is no discussion about who is going to have time off to care for them when they are ill or need doctors appointments, and he is often away so couldn't help with childcare at all. One of my friends and her husband use most of their holiday leave looking after their kids when they are sick during the year and then never get to have actual holiday.

Got to go, J screaming. Tryb to catch up with rest tomorrow!

That must have been awful Sponge! I would have reacted in exactly the same way.