Fab Feb 2009: attack of the zombie mums

[dinkystinky]

So here we all are, complete with babies and gro-bags under our eyes

Hi all.

Was out all day yesterday so haven't caught up, but hope you're all as well, happy and rested as can be expected.

Luc was screaming his head off in mothercare yesterday, but then settled down for most of the day. Was out with a friend who has a baby 6 weeks older and she covered my pushchair up with a blanket to stop the shop's bright lights interrtupting DS's sleep. Did feel like I was pushing a budgie around the shops, but he slept happily for a few hours.

Had another osteo appt yesterday evening. Is magic how he makes him go from screaming to completely zoned out just by holding his neck a certain way. Not sure if that contributed to him sleeping well or not....

I didn't get a full 4hrs slot of sleep, but did get two lots of 3 and a 2, so not feeling too bad today. DH got a full 6hrs - could've been longer if he'd come to bed earlier.

Two things we've been trying:

Have been trying the 'dream feed' approach, which haven't before. Can't see a damn thing, which is tricky, but he settled back to sleep really well after. Unfortunately he didn't feed enough - was too scared that giving second breast would cause him to wake up/be sick which meant he didn't last longer than 3 hrs.

Also, on swaddling....my mum has been going on and on about it. I prefer using the grobags though as feel happier than the blankets. However, we have noticed that when he's happily asleep in our arms and then we put him in the cot the first thing that happens is his arms fling out to the side. Two nights now of gradually detaching him and then holding his arms while put him down and then for a minute after means he has not noticed. Ok, it's only 2 nights, but pretty happy so far.

Have to go as he's waking up and we're off out to have lunch with my mum for her birthday - the joys of not working!

Beantin on the whole it sounds like you had a good day and pretty good night last night. Hope it is a turning point for you guys

Pink - sending you hugs and a kick up the bum for your not so DP....

SMS - wow, sounds like you are going to have a wonderful Sat night and a v hungover sunday morning! Enjoy - you deserve it. And glad Luke went down well last night.

Danny slept 6 hours and then a 4 hour stretch last night - was a lovely surprise (dont worry, know it wont happen again) but ow, my boobs were huge and painful!

ouch dinky.. nothing like boulder boobs to make you feel good in the morning is there!

dp came back from dropping off dd and was suddenly in good form again.... fine, we all have bad moods but he was taking it out on poor dd this morning and that's what pisses me off about his moodiness, he can't just be in a bad mood like a normal person, he has to make everyone around him feel like shit too i dunno, he's making an effort the last week and things are nicer now but this morning just reminded me how shit it is when he's not making a huge effort, and realistically, how long is he going to keep this up for?

off to do the shopping now with the boys... it's miserable out there though, going to be soaked just getting to the car!

beantin... for the dreamfeed why don't you get a little plug in night light, they don't give off much light, not enough to wake baby but they mean you can at least vaguely see baby and boob to get the 2 together

Pink - glad DP is back to being in a good mood. I have to admit my mum was a bit like that - when she was in a foul mood when we were growing up, no one escaped her wrath - but she seems to have mellowed with age and would never ever treat her grandchildren the way she did us as kids. Hope your DP mellows too - and a hell of a lot faster.

Beantin - Pink's suggestion of a plug in night light is really good. We had an autofade night light for DS1 (Blooming Marvellous, Jojomamanbebe and a few other places sell them) which was handy as it had a dimmer so you could leave the light on as a very low glow - but also had a 5 min autofade function so will fade from being dimly lit to totally dark over 5 minutes. DS1 loves it and still has it in his room so have had to buy another one to use with Danny - I swear by ours...

Hello all

I am excited about the meetup!

What is a dream feed?

And I think I have figured out that F hates his Grobag. He had just blankets last night and slept 9-1.30, feed, and then 2 til 5.45.

MS - dream feed is a late night feed (usually about 10.30/11ish) you give the baby (wake them and feed them while v drowsy). The theory is it will help them sleep for a longer stretch at night. DS1 wasnt a dream feeder and am not bothering with Danny either but mates who have done it swore by it

Thanks Dinky, I think I would be terrified of waking F up to the point of no return and then spending hrs trying to get him back to sleep!

I puzzled yesterday for ages, I knew I was walking to school to get dd (so out and about for roughly 1hr 15mins) F had been asleep for a couple of hours but I knew he would wake up and be starving so I worried for ages if I should wake him up to feed him or just bundle him up and pop him in the pram and hope he lasted the journey. I ummed and aahed for so long by the time I woke him he had a 15min speed feed and then we went out.

WWYD?

Hmm, tricky one. I'd bundle him into the buggy and probably end up feeding while stuck at the school gates!

Where is everybody??? Am boooooooooooooooored...

Haven't you got children to attend to? Oh, I get it they're napping. I forget that some children do that!

Just got back from weigh in. Little porker has gone from 9lbs 9oz to 10lbs 10oz in 2 weeks. He's now celebrating by having a feed and I'm on Coke and Mars bars. A precious 30 mins sit down before I get the Human Whirlwind from nursery. Not for me the luxury of boredom!

ms, i tend to leave him asleep if at all possible but transfer him to carseat or buggy early enough that if moving him wakes him i have time to feed him before i go.

that and pull in at the side of the road to feed if he's shouting and i won't get home within the next five mins!

i've never been brave enough to dreamfeed either with mine, that being said all mine fed at various points in the evening anyway so would have been a bit daft to wake them 1/2 hour after their last feed! aaron's last feed before i go to bed is usually 10/11 pm anyway (he's still downstairs with us in the evenings as it's just easier all round)

Sorry Dinky, was out for a long lunch

Hmm....well I did 'dreamfeeds' at 130am and 5am.....he was awake enough to let me know he was hungry, but was v drowsy during feed and slept immed after. Am gonna look up the autofade lamps as we have a lumi lamp in our room, which we love.

are they dreamfeeds if the baby wakes up and asks for food?

i thought a dreamfeed was when you wake them up before you go to bed to feed them in the hope they'll sleep longer?

were you not feeding as soon as he woke at night before this then?

who knows then....

was feeding when he woke up before, but put light on, read book, etc. he was then tricky to put down - sometimes taking two hours.

PT I always thought that the dreamfeed was when you don't wake them and feed them whilst still pretty much asleep. I actually wake DD and keep her awake for about an hour between 10pm and 11pm - feed her , then feed her again at 11pm to top her upso that I get a good feed in her (she can't take a lot of feed at one go). I don't consider this to be a dreamfeed just a feed at that time of the night IYSWIM ? ...

Otherwise, hi all - been out and about today. Tried a new playgroup (drop in type) about 5 mins from my house this morning - I used to go but it was quite badly organised and I found the women a bit cliquey. Bumped into an ante natal friend I'd not seen in a while on monday and she now runs it (she was a very ambitious career woman before her ds arrived) and it's now extremely well organised and very popular. DS was happy, there were bouncy chairs and playgyms for DD and DS got to do sticking/drawing and playdough which I didn't have to clear up . Took up the morning so I'm going again ! Nice bunch of friendly non-intimidating ladies too. Have spent the afternoon at my mums getting her to make me cups of tea and jiggle the baby . Roll on the weekend and then DH is off for a week next week - hurray.

I'm a dream feeding fan. I haven't tried it with Abi yet but might try tonight as she is currently asleep in her own bed! Someone on another thread recommended full swaddling with babies that won't settle so despite having done in the early days with little success I thought I would give it a go tonight. She's been asleep for about an hour now - I have heard her wake up and she's gone back to sleep - I am amazed!

McD - with DS the first night I swaddled him (not til 6 weeks) with the Mothercare Miracle swaddle he went until 5.30am...when til then he'd been waking twice in the night. I've swaddled DD with the same thing since birth (took it to hospital with me) and have done ever since. She's in it til she works her way out of it even though I am told they should be out of it by 8 weeks. She looks like a chicken fajita all rolled up in it.

lol chicken fajita - I know what you mean! I can't tell you how many times I've been upstairs and checked on her - last time I even had to double check she was still breathing!!! I have tried to put her down to bed so many times since she was born with no success.

How long was your DS in it? (I am also using the miracle blanket from Mothercare)

huh? get up during the night?

no wonder you lot are exhausted if that's what ye do! i've never turned on a light or gotton out of bed for a baby until this week when i took aaron out of the room because of dp having an exam the next day (and was told off for being 'sweet but daft' by him)

never considered them dreamfeeds though... always termed it 'shoving the boob in babies mouth before they realise they're awake'.... ahhh, the joys of co-sleeping, i could not be dealing with actually having to be up with a baby during the night... and bright lights make me cranky anyway, if i'm going to be awake with a cross baby far better it be in the dark

fair deuce to you being able to read when woken in the middle of the night.... i fell over the cat the other night on my way downstairs my eyes were so blurry

Ah, there you all are McD I'm a huge fan of swaddling - DS1 was swaddled until he was around 6 months old (he needed it to help him settle down for naps and sleeps then grew out of it).

We're off to mates in Tunbridge Wells tomorrow for our first weekend away with DS2 - fingers crossed its not a nightmare. DS1 is very excited as they've got a little boy a few months younger than him who he is great friends with and we're going to a thomas themed day on the Saturday - he's stopped chundering so fingers crossed he'll be ok. Have just been compiling my list of things to take and thank god we upgraded our car from a mini is all I can say...

Ooh have a nice time Dinky and let me know what you think of the Thomas day. I have considered taking DS in the past but never got round to it .

PT Hope your day's been ok.
Beantin We have a very smell plug in night light like PT suggests, we got it for a coupke of quid in Tescos and is just enough for me to see by but not enough to wake either ds, we also have one in ds1's room so I can see what I'm doing in there at 3am
MS If I was going somewhere where I knoew I couldn't feed Luke, I'd wake him up before we left I think. Depends on how long after he'd roughly be due a feed too, I have left Luke for about half an hour, normally when I'm needing to get to shops before ds1's lunch and nap but don't think I'd want to leave it any longer than that
PT Beantin I always thought a dream feed was when you fed them when they were still asleep or not really awake, therefore you decide to feed, they haven't asked for it.
McDreamy Ialso commented on that other thread suggesting swaddling. Yesterday was the firt time I did it ever and it really calmed Luke and he slept all day. I didn't swaddle through the night because I felt the blankets were just too thick and he's get too hot so went out today and bought some pram sheets, swaddled him at bedtime and he threw a massive grump and wouldn't settle, so I unwrapped him and he was straight asleep. Bit strange I know but I will continue doing it during day to calm from the colic and just tuck him under blankets at night.

We've been out all day because ds1 spent this morning making the mostg annoying groaning noise (just a horrible noise, he's not ill or anything) and Luke was unhappy so we went out and ds1 was so good again, this child really is amazing me! We went to Pizza Hut for a pasta lunch and as he was so well behaved I got him an ice-cream, how cute is this, he got ice-cream onto his spoon but instead of putting it in his mouth, he put it in mine. He fed me his whole (tiny) bowl of ice-cream. He did not let me have the smarties I'd put on top of it though.

Ah, your DS1 story is adorable SMS. You have him well trained!

McDreamy - will report back. Our friends only moved to TW 3 weeks ago so I think they're blitzing the things to do in TW scene before they start work next week...

dinky have a great weekend. I Ds1 wants to go to Thomas land.