June 2008: Nine months in, nine months out

[Essie3]

Here's to the next nine months!

Hahaha, more than anything else in that post!

I think some kids just refuse to bf - I know a woman who tried everything with her first - but it didn't work - and then had no trouble with her second. She says that her older boy just wouldn't do it. Sponge - I hope you have the same experience though.

(Actually, I've been meaning to say that I've been thinking Alex wouldn't bf for a reason - so you'd be able to get pregnant with this next one! Maybe he really really really wanted a sibling)

Hi, have just about caught up on the posts!

I think a Scotland meet up is an excellent idea, we should definitely try and get it sorted asap!

B has a cold too, and has passed it on to me, very kind of him I thought. He is a lot better today, so I'm hoping it's going to be a quick one, and it won't knock me out too much - especially as DP is away again this week.

Sponge and Essie, am horrified at the way you were both treated at work.

I think most bf support is totally crap tbh. No one tells you that it can be so very painful at first, and my experience with LLL was not great either - certainly not worth the phone call. I went to a bf workshop before B was born, looking back on it, it was a total waste of time.

Essie, well done on the accreditation.

I have forgotten all the other things I was going to say...

Just to add my tuppence worth - I felt really let down by the support offered to me when S didn't bf. Women in post natal wards need access to decent bf counsellors if they are having problems - not busy me's coming round for 5 mind every 3 hours. I find it quite hard to think about my experience still. Someone I know locally overcame all sorts of stuff to bf and did amazingly - she had a brilliant mw though - I really wish I'd had her. She was part of my me team but I guess I lucked out. I have a beautiful healthy baby though so I guess that's the main thing.

Sponge I'm glad your thinking ahead - I think it's important for you to focus on achieving a positive experience.

for little Ivan Cameron.....that could be my little Oli, same bloody sirname also which makes it oddly sound more prounounced when mentioned in tragic terms.

well essie I think fwiw if you become a supporter you're likely to make a difference as you've listened to people like sponge and me and taken it onboard..

sponge I can't remember what your birth expeirence was like but know that it is possible if you have a ventouse or cs or some kind of drug that baby will be sleepy and delay feeding for that vital time - mw seemed to think edie being bit dopey and slow to latch would have been that (altho as I've said were other issues)

may need to abuse the fb group to have help for outfit for going to a wedding - I don't know them very well (ie at all -they are dh mates) so have no idea of tone of do so have to balance the style issue with the what is least likely to present a good target/fiddling challenge for edie (I'm thinking beading would be too much of a temptation to gnaw /play with)

5 -any idea why or just that they are being investigated?

Aarrrrggghhhh I don't like the auto correct on this. Busy Mw's not busy me's! Good on you essie for getting involved in supporting others.

Also feel very sorry for the cameron family - it must be devastating.

Schools - meant to say earlier, my socialism doesn't exactly rage in my old age but I wouldn't send DS private. Sponge, parts of edinburgh are quite affluent and not as much poverty as others cities I guess. Education and learning probably always been a bit of a thing round these parts. Whole generations of families go private - often at considerable sacrifice. School fees often left in wills etc. I don't think it's a reflection on state schools - just the done thing. The traffic is much noticably lighter on a day when only private schools on holiday believe it or not!

Josey - I thought of you and Oli and the surname coincidence this morning. Hope you aren't feeling too down about it. Hugs.

Good for you Essie, that's great! What a rewarding thing to do .

Do you think I can become an accredited ff support person - I know all about it!!

Honestly, Essie, I think that's fantastic - esp as you weren't really that fussed to begin with! And you have so much knowledge about what can go wrong from here too, good for you.

As for reasons for A not feeding, don't really know. I think I've mentioned before I have completely flat nipples (great for wearing t-shirts, not so great for bf!! ) but I prefer AH's reason tbh, he wanted a sibling desperately!

BDQ, totally agree with you about having a healthy baby - that's what matters.

poppy, long birth, induced, excruciating pain, epidural, prepped for c-section, missed it by a push, forceps delivery, could have affected Alex?

5, shocking about your HV - how awful. Hope it's not your confidentiality she breached .

josey, I also thought of you when I heard about Ivan. Must be so hard for you to hear such things .

whinegums, hope B's cold comes to nothing, esp as you haven't got dh home.

BDQ, v interesting about schools - always think of Scotland being very left wing and private education less prevalent.

no all that sounds things that could affect alex from what mw told me - I also had the nipple issue...but I lile the siblng theory better

well bread machine update - its ready but bit flat and disappointing (and did everything by the book) -may try with different recipe I used when had one before .. suspect that cleaner/dss may have accidentally switched it off as appearance seems to match what happens when you switch power off. I'm crushed (but not as crushed as my bread )

LOL about Scotland being left wing, one of the most "English" sounding people I know went to Fettes (Blair's old school) in Edinburgh, and she is actually from somewhere near Inverness. Her 21st was seriously upmarket. The Torys struggle in Scotland though, so u are right I guess.

Ooh, dont get me started on the politics of Scotland. I've been involved in politics over the years so could go on at length. I wont though!

Edinburgh is a pretty different kettle of fish from the rest of Scotland though.

poppy sorry about your bread - have you checked out the recipe bit on MN? I've spied loads of bread making threads in the past.

poppy oh! I am so lusting after that breadmachine (and I feel like a loser for writing that sentence!) so your results are so disappointing. Can you report in when you try again?

sponge yup - his birth would make it much more challenging for Alex to bf. With DS1 I had morphine and he was very sleepy and he took a few days to latch on whereas DS2 tried right away (not that it was easy, but at least we were both trying. It's very hard with a sleepy baby). I'm still going with the sibling theory.

Not as many private schools up here - I don't think I know anyone except expats who aren't in the regular system.

hugs to josey - I was almost in tears reading the news and I can imagine it would be scary for you! I'm so glad Oli is such a healthy girl most of the time.

Poppy - breadmachine tip, they have allsorts of special flours in Lakeland for breadmachines. My Mum seemed to like using them when I got them as a Xmas present. I was getting a bit stuck for ideas that year

AH, thank you, that helps to know

Ali, I read your sentence as "they have all sorts of special floors in Lakeland for bread machines" and was imaging Lakeland Nirvana with floors and floors and floors of --useless- glorious kitchen goodies!

I love that shop! Nearly as much as I love IKEA - but not quite!

Poppy - I love my bread machine and have an older version of yours and it gets used a lot.

HV - she has had a formal complaint laid against her, basically she was doing an 8 month check on a little boy and a few weeks earlier she had done the same check on his cousin. She said to the second boy well at least you are not backward like your cousin, so mother wrote to Dr surgery complaining about HV talking about her boys development. She has also said to another mother whose daughter was on 25th percentile for height that she was a dwarf so i just don't go there anymore.

josey i was thinking of you and Oli when I heard that on the radio. I had a freind at school who had a sister who had very bad CP, and this friends daughter I think has it aswell.

well Abdhiker I'm pleased to report that the unpromising looking loaf actually tasted yummy and was surprisingly light so I'm very pleased with breadmaker. Going to try brioche tomorrow.

ali I have tried those before and they are really nice (lakeland is banned in this house for reasons of my latent tat accumulation habit - I'm amazed I managed to sneak the breadmaker in). and lakeland is nirvana sponge so many nice things (I did manage to sneak a few christmas decorations in tho from there - but even i'll concede I'm running out of space for christmas tat and I'm not sure any ofit is toddler friendly).

but good idea to check out hte thread on recipes..

five am at your HV. Appalling.

Josey, I have been thinking of you and Oli today - it was nice to hear on the radio so many positive stories about living with CP though, it made me realise how much joy Oli must bring you even though i can only begin to imagine how hard it is too .

Five, at your HP! I am glad she complained.

Ali, well done on the sleep! It sounds very sweet what you are doing with the singing.

I have a very romantic left-wing idea about schools and think if only everyone just sent their kid to the local school it would improve all schools rather than having a brain drain to the 'best' schools which then are the best cos all the bright kids whose parents give a toss go there. Anyway, I know in practice that is too idealistic and unrealistic, and easy for me to say as all our local schools are good. It would annoy me if people came to our church just to get into the local school, but it would also make me happy if more people came to church - maybe just one or two would actually start to believe! But no, Ali, I don;t think that is what most mums of 8mo babies are thinking about!

DH really wants our kids to go private but I am torn cos I think it is such a lot of money and lots of poeple I know who went private are tossers. I don't want my kids growing up thinking they are better than other kids (eg their own cousins) just cos they go to private school (I have seen this in my and DH's families). I went to a crap school and did OK and DH is a partner in a law firm ffs and his education was free too! I think DH has visions of one of our kids being prime minister and doesn't think that's possible without going private (he wanted to be PM and thinks his education held him back - what a saddo! )

T has a terrible cold, very snotty and has woken up this eve (four hours since last Calpol) so I am doing CC (Calpol and Cuddles) to get him back to sleep. Got the Medised for later if necessary! E is sleeping through at the mo - last week it was the other way round. Bummer for me! I went to a wedding on Saturday and it has taken till today to get over the hangover and lack of sleep! I feel so much better today though, I have felt very down this week and I kept thinking 'it's cos I am tired' but then when I still felt crap this morning I was thinking 'maybe it's more than tiredness' - I even said to DH I'll swap wth you, I'll go to work you stay at home!' but after a little nap this morning during the DTs' nap I am right as rain again. I have been feeling like a bad mummy recently cos I am most happy with the DTs when they sleep well. I always feel so proud and say to DH 'aren't they wonderful?' when they sleep and then I think 'Mmmm, maybe that's not really the point of having kids?' but it's only cos I know how miserable I feel when I am tired and love it when they let me sleep!

Our only other news is that E will now only sit (not lie down) in the bath which is a pain cos I have to sit there in case she topples over. Usually I can potter round the bedroom/bathroom (they are in ensuite so keep sticking my head in) while they are in the bath - not any more, although I do have one of those plastic seat things, I just keep forgetting to get it before they go in the bath. It is in the nursery - doh. MIL is taking the DTs for a couple of hours tomorrow afternoon - woo hoo!

Neenz, I agree with you that all children should go to their local school, but also that this is very idealistic!

Sorry you have been feeling down but sleep deprivation is an absolute killer, so can understand how you would feel down when you're tired .

Dh has been having crawling races with Alex - Alex thinks it's hilarious:

competitive dad!

Well the PM went to state school neenz!

So did John Major.

Sponge - fantastic video. Made me LOL.

Neenz glad to hear that you are feeling less tired.

Agree Poppy that Lakeland is a fantastic place, but we have a small kitchen and not much spare space for new stuff. A breadmaker would certainly be banned in our house.

Five that is quite shocking about the HV. How did you find all this out? Is the local grapevine doing the trick.