APRIL 2008 - We venture over to the 'other side'

[VictorianSqualor]

Our babies.

07 March: Ashton, a fourth child for gemprincess, 5lb 13oz @ 34+6
09 March: Ted, a second DS for Daftmoo, 7lb 14oz @ 36+0
21 March: George William, a first baby for KnitterintheNW, 7lb 2.5oz @ 37+3
25 March: Olivia, a second baby for TheMaskedPoster, 7lb 2oz @ 38+4
28 March: Pablo, a third baby and first DS for vacaloca, 7lb 14oz @ 39+4
28 March: Matteo Alexander, a first baby for Gangle @ 38+0 (?)
30 March: A baby girl, a second child for PortAndLemon, 8lb 15oz @ 39+5
02 April: Jak, a baby boy for rainbowdays, 9lb @ 39+1
02 April: A baby boy, a second child for bunyanvillas, 6lb 14oz @ 37+5
02April: Struan, a baby boy for Donnabels, 6lbs 15oz
02 April: A baby boy for mummyofaprincess @39 weeks
03 April: A baby girl for PippiCalzelunghe @38+2weeks
03 April: Aeryn Daisy, a baby girl for Denny185, 9lb 8oz @ 39+3
03 April: Benjamin, a baby boy for Micegg, 8lb 3oz @ 39+4
03 April: Roelof Grové, a first DS for Sal22, 7lb 5oz @ 38+5
03 April: A baby boy for siikibam, 6lb 8.5oz @39+1wks
04 April: Matilda, a baby girl for AprilsFoolsBaby 7lb @
06 April: Henry Peter, a baby boy for Sheds, 7lb 130z @ 40+4
07 April: Sebastian George, a fourth DS for Peachy, 8lb 4oz @ 41+1
07 April: Jack, a first baby for ThePFJ, 7lb 5.5oz @ 41+1
07 April: Lexie Bea, a fourth baby for babywhiting, 8lb 1oz @ 39+4
08 April: Alasdair, a second DS for bunnyrabbit, 8lb 5.5oz @ 40+3
08 April: James Samuel, a third baby for honeybee10, 6lb 7oz @ 37+2
09 April: Zara Mia Martin, a first baby for V1KK1M, 7lb 10oz @ 41+0
11 April: Kyran for rdk, 7lb 13oz @ 38+3weeks
11 April: Sebastian James, a second baby for Fleecy, 10lb 2oz @ 40+4
11 April: A baby girl, a first baby for CeylonSapphire, 7lb 12oz @ 41+1
12 April: Maya Alice, a first baby for egyptianprincess, 8lb 15.5oz @ 40+3
12 April: Sophia Viviana, a second DD for AussieDivaonaBreak, 6lb 12oz @ 39+3
15 April: Alexander Oliver, a third baby for VictorianSqualor, 10lb 3oz @ 41+0
16 April: Ailish, a first baby for Mollyfloss, 6lb 11oz @ 40+3
16 April: A baby girl, a second baby for elfsmummy, 7lb 13oz @ 41+1
16 April: Zoe, a baby girl, a first baby for ToastAddict, 6lb 10oz @ 39+3
17 April: A baby boy for paranoidmumy, 8lb 9oz @ 41+4
17 April: A baby boy, a second son for lorisparkle, 7lb 12.5oz @ 41+6
18 April: Millie, a baby girl for scorpio1 8lb 9oz @ 41+?
18 April: Cameron, a second baby for munchkinmum @ 39+5
19 April: Oliver Michael, first baby for bashboid, 7 lb 4 oz at 41 +3
20 April: Samuel, a first baby for Velbels. 8lb15oz at 41+1weeks.
20 April: Angharad Mai, 8lb 4oz, 40+6, first for 7monthsplus
20 April: Emilia, 7lb15oz, a first baby for SuzeM, 40+6
21 April: Eve, a second baby for Scampmum, 8lb 4oz @ 39+3
22 April: Sam, a second son for Soph73 @ 40+0
22 April: Molly, a first baby for EllieG, 8lb 8oz? @ 40+5
22 April: Daisy, second baby for AttilaTheHan @ 40 +3
22 April: Zoe Olivia, second daughter for Piccallilli2 7lb 1oz @42+1
23 April: Jessica Elizabeth, first baby for BabyBratt @ 40+1 7lb 12oz.
24 April: A baby girl, a second daughter for christmaspixie, 9lb 2oz @ 40+6/41+5
24 April: Miya Jade, baby girl for ShelleySare at 39+4
25 April: Amelie, a first baby for Dondons, 9lb, 41+3 (i think!)
25 April: Aisha, a second baby for Jaq39 7lb 14oz @ 41+4
26 April: Hope Olivia, a second dd for northeastmummy, 7lb 11oz at 41 .
26 April: Gabriel, a third child for Bainmarie @ 41+5
26 April: Eli Michael, a baby boy for LittleMissTurquoise, 7lb 15.5oz @ 40+5
27 April: a baby girl for Ayomi, 6lb 1oz @ 41+0
28 April: Jacob Andrew, a 2nd DS for Kaybeeand2boys, 8lb 4oz @ 41+5
29 April: Thomas Henry, a 2nd DS for TLSM, 7lb 8oz 40+3
30 April: Harry Samuel, a fourth ds for Chipmonkey, 9lb 5oz @ 39+2
01 May: Sophie May, a baby grl for Annieroo, 6lb 5oz @ 41+4
01 May: Euan George, a baby boy for Jenniejennie, 8lb @ 40+4
02 May: Robyn Olivia, a baby girl for soph28, 8lb 1oz @ 42+1
05 May: Nora Martina, a first baby for Eva07, 7lb 8oz @ 41+2
05 May: A baby boy for Beeper, 8lb 10oz @ 41+0
05 May: Gabriella Summer, a first baby for Mum2babyroo, 8lb 4oz @ 40+6
06 May: Wilf, 8lb 60z for bigbadmom @ 41+6
07 May: James Andrew, a second ds for Moominsmummy, 8lb 13oz @ 41+5
08 May: Ellie Isabella, a first baby for Carey87, 7 lb 8oz @ 42+1
08 May: Robin David, a 2nd baby for Woollymummy, 8lb 11 oz @ 41+3
09 May: 4 kittens for scorpio's cat!
10 May: Astrid Mary, a second dd for sagitta, 8lb 8oz @ 42+0

Fantastic sleeping Denny! Can we swap babies? Boot camp yesterday went like a dream - she was perfect, and I almost enjoyed her company. But then she slept from 7.00pm- 10.30, then 11 to 1.30 - then cried from 3.30 am onwards. Still crying. So I am right back to the end of my tether. DH can't take any more either, and went to work early and isn't coming home tonight. At least I won't have to worry about him as well though.
How long can someone survive on three hours sleep a day?

why isn't he coming home - work or because of baby??

i understand how you feel, my ds1 was the ame and his dad was/is useless and i used to wake up crying myself i was so exhausted. as i was ff my friend stayed over for 2 days and did him in the night for me.

Does your dh help/support you in the night? even if he got up and made you a drink or something. when mimi was about 4 days old she stayed up most of the night and dh did with me so i wasn't 'alone'.

Can/do you express? have a night off or at least 4 or 5 hours?

Bit of both, really. He doesn't help at all in the night - I feel guilty about him having to go to work on no sleep. But I would love to express and let him do a night at a weekend, but I think he'll panic and it'll go horribly wrong. He's only changed her nappy once, and won't hold her if she's crying for more than a minute or two before he gets cross. In his defence, he's tired too.
Can't stop crying myself today. It's going to be a noisy, wet day here!

Sagitta, my love, you need some more help.

Why would it go wrong? he only has to put a bottle in her mouth, and you will be near if something does go wrong. maybe express and supervise the first feed iyswim?

It sounds like he needs to get more hands on with her....do small baby's scare him? was he like this with dd1? does he bath her, comfort her? Her crying, he has to know is normal and does not mean something dreadful.

Try not to get upset, its harder if you dwell iyswim. Do you feel down alot?

Lol 50 million questions.....just help me to help you iyswim.

It didn't last sagitta she was up at 2 last night.

R u going to try and stick to boot camp today? DD1 was a screamer found with her she slept better in car seat, I think the scrunched up feeling, I know your not supposed to leave them in for long periods but if it works maybe she could go in after the 3.30 screams to try and get an extra couple of hours?

Can anyone else come over and give you a hand for a day or 2 - even if they can't stop her screaming they could maybe take her our walking for a couple of hours so u can get some kip.

How longs your garden? I used to shove DD1 in her pram at bottom and ignore (after feed, change etc ob) I did warn the neighbours though

and dont feel guilty, one night will not hurt him. DH gets up with Mimi on sunday early morning feed (mimi's night iyswim) and i lie in until i cannot bear the boob pain anymore, lol. Also he will do a bit in the week - mimi fed at 6 this morning and stayed awake, so dh got up with her and i slept until 7.

Feeling a little bit tired in comparison to you being exhausted is nothing. Is his job very physical? DH's is, but he still does it.

I hope you don't think im being mean at all. Will a chat with him help?

With a rain cover if it's wet ob

lol @ garden Denny

i wish i had a garden when i had ds1 the little git.

Sagitta

cry-sis, line for people with excessively crying babies.

You poor things, must be really hard.

Ah sweetie, hugs. If it's any consolation you sound EXACTLY like I felt two weeks ago so maybe it will get better? Having said that DD2 didn't really settle after 4.45 this am (I was stupidly watching the Wire and didn't tear myself away until 12...), but when you've had a couple of OK nights (which is one block of 3 hrs and some more for me) the terrible ones are much easier to cope with. Is DD1 at nursery at all? Can you get someone to come over and help? I am planning to give DH a night of feeding but at the moment since she's up a lot in the early morning I don't tend to have much to express. Going to have a go now, though. Echo Scorpio's thoughts on engaging DH more (she's so wise!)
. Mine is generally very good (and amazing now with DD1) but watching him closely I realise he just feels a bit useless next to me. Made him get up and settle her at 4ish on Sunday am and he was so proud of himself for managing.

I am wondering when we do do this feted night of swapping whether I will stay in the house or go to a friend's - I worry a) that I would get up and interfere and not be able to sleep through any noise and b) that it would be just too tempting having me there. DD1 has only woken up one night (!) since we had DD2 but it's a bit unfair leaving him here with both in case she chooses to again. Hmm.

It was my saving grace with DD1 I do think i'd have gone mad if i couldn't have got away from her screaming. During my next 2 pregnancies it was my main concern - whether it would be another screamer, didn't even think about disabilities, I think it's that traumatic it really takes it out of you. It also took a very long time to 'bond' with her prob a good 18 months.

What a great help line peachy

Thanks for the support! Sorry about your night Denny...

DH isn't great with babies, no. But neither am I, lol. I will try to start expressing, but so far I've been too tired to figure out how the steriliser works etc - pathetic but there it is. Dh has an office job, but a really long commute. He's out from 7.45 am to 8 or 9pm. And his office is moving next week, adding another 30 mins each way to his commute.

I can hear A when I'm outisde, but not when I'm MNng! (Hence me being on MN a lot when times are tough!) I can't really leave her outside when I'm in, as its not very safe.

Will talk to DH when he comes back tomorrow. Again, in his defence, he is very good at taking DD1 off my hands - when he's here.

I dn't have PND, don't think. Just fecking tired.

agree with Denny's feeling about a 'screamer'. ds1 was a terrible baby, didnt sleep through until he was 2. terrible terrible. I ws so concerned that ds2 would be a screamer i regularly used to cry at dh that i just wouldnt be able to do it.

I once was so desperate i asked the HV to take him away.

My saving grace was 2 wonderful friends; though if i as bf-ing i dont know what i would have done.

Thanks Peachy - I know you're having a shit time too, so wish I could help you!

If Dh can't help coz of his long hours is there anyone who could? Even for an hour or 2?

Sagitta most sterilisers you just bung in the microwave with bit of water for 5 ish minutes.

Could your dh change jobs or offices? i know its so hard when they work that long. I guess i have it easier than you and feel bad for moaning about my dh working hours now

I'm sure you are great at doing babies. some men are very wary of baby's and prefer them when they talk, can show you etc. but that doesnt mean you are exclusively the parent iyswim. Yes he may help you with dd1 but you have a dd2 too.

You could put him on crash course of learning, lol. instead of just doing it, give her to him but be next to him, then move away more over time and then he will be able to do it himself.

We all take time to learn how to do babies, i am still learning. but we need to do the practical to learn.

Re PND, i describe mine when i had it as a cloud, keep an eye out, but im sure you are just very tired and worn out tbh.

Do you get any 'me' time? Bath, shower time? that is my saving grace time, i lock the door, take music in with me and sing

and dont feel embarrassed or upset about asking someone for help, its normal and everybody needs help. Even me

((sagitta)) I don't have any advice but I soo know how you are feeling. am thinking of you

Scorpio youv'e got loads of fab advice you chould be an agony aunt or councilor or psycotherapist or something.

lol denny

just have been there done that and felt so desperate, with no help or nobody really.

MN is for moaning, Scorpio ! There's always someone worse off...

Will try to get DH more involved. I think we're going to move so he can be nearer work, so that might help, and I don't know anyone locally, so will be good to move back to where our friends are. Although that won't happen for a bit.

Maybe I should give in and get a dummy...what do you think? I've resisted as dd1 still has one and is obsessed by it - and I can see that her teeth are growing oddly. So I wanted to avoid it with A. But I found myself in mothercare yesterday coveting them!

Scamp - definitely go away for the night. I reckon that's the only way to get real rest! I lie awake fantasising about going off to a hotel on my own, with luscious clean white sheets and complete silence!

Now I'm feeling really bad at everyone being so nice to me when we're all having a tough time. I'm gong to shut up now

Mimi has had a dummy since birth, i think Alex has too...and many others. Mimi finds it nice for comfort. try one, tommee tippee ones good

Jay had one and gave it up himself, Zac had one until he was 2 when it was swapped for an easter egg (all ff though)

i hope your dh helps you, we are here too.

A HV once said dummies are great but take them away at 4 months it's the easiest time to get rid of them again - don't know how true it is.

The other thing is if you go by SIDs research dummies are good.

If it gives you some peace go with the dummy