Shit night.
very fucked up.
feeling weird.
Took J to Justin. He hadn't got the stairgate. Told me it didn't matter, he'd just keep the living room and dining room doors shut. I said no way, he wasn't staying without a stairgate on the stairs. The gf got very cross. Told me I was being unreasonable and J couldn't get through closed doors. I told Justin that J was not staying without one, so suggested he go and get the one he said was at his mum's and I'd bring J back later. Then I left. bit more stuff went on, texts etc. He finally went to get the gate an hour or more later. I took J back (against every instinct in my body). I was extra nice. I spoke quietly and stayed calm (these don't come easy to me ). I went upstairs to put him in the cot. Justin followed me, gf followed him, glaring at me. We get upstairs. I take J's shoes and jumper off, gf is still glaring. I sit down to feed J. (had previously agreed with Justin that I would only feed J in the bedroom where he would sleep as it would piss gf off if I did it in front of Justin. I wasn't happy about this but went along with it. So we're in the bedroom. I start to feed J. She pushes in front of me and asks me what I think I'm doing. I tell her I'm feeding my son. She tells me she's not happy that I'm doing it with her and Justin there. I tell her I'm feeding my child and won't stop because she doesn't like it. I'm then told it's her house and she won't have it. I said that Justin had told me to feed J upstairs and I'm only doing as I was told. She turns on him and asks him. He says that yes, he did say that. I said I wouldn't apologise for feeding my child. She vitually spat "bitch" at me and walked out. Justin followed her. I carried on feeding J. I could hear them rowing, then the front door slammed. I finished the feed, went downstairs and said to Justin that I thought I should take J home as he needed to sort things out with the gf, but that I would bring J back in the morning and leave him for a few hours. We talked calmly, he convinced me that he realised he'd been a twat, admitted he had forgotten the stairgate, hadn't really thought he didn't need it at all. I agreed that J could stay on the understanding that when the gf got back there would be no arguing and he said no, she'd be fine once she calmed down. I left.
I got a text a couple of hours later saying I didn't need to worry about her being at the house with J. I asked why. He said she came back and tried to start an argument about me, which he wouldn't let her do as he had promised that they wouldn't while J was in the house. He defended my actions and she kicked off. Then she hit him so he made her leave and they have split up. He says there is no way they can go back on what was said/done tonight.
I've told him I'm sorry, that I never intended for it to end up like this. He knows I didn't. I asked if he wanted me to go get J and he said please don't so I have left him there.
A bit shaken by it all and weirded out. But is has proved I was totally right to make Justin have time alone with J away from their house before I let him go there.
No idea what will happen now, he can't stay in the house without her. I know he's not my problem, and he's caused me enough, but I still wouldn't wish that on him.