Oct 2007 - This little piggy had pureed butternut squash and a slice of pear...

[alicet]

Well thought I should start a new thread in time to link it on the old one!!!

Well, idling away on here and fb while dh watches the football.

Stefka - I can only sympathise with the stress/anxiety. Post on here anytime you want to let it out. Can't help with the bf I'm afraid, but it sounds like Dareh is doing well.

Inzi - sorry Jane is having a rough day - hope tomorrow is better.

Crochet - well done at the weight loss! And very impressed with the kitchen chair!

Muppet - lol at the skipping.

Tried out the new sunshade thing today - it's really good - much better than it looks! I did have to put the drape right down over the front and only got a small whine of protest from inside. It did look rather like a burqa on wheels...

I DID IT COME SMELL MY ARMPITS!!!!!!!

I am sat typing with very sweaty fingers and a bright red face but suitably stupidlyproud of myself. Neede a quick wee at the skiping stage but really need to build up those pelvic floor muscles so no sorprise there.

Am off for a shower beofre I stink the place out... (well done Crochetdiva on the weight lose, fantastic, fantasic, fantastic in the words of one John Barrowman x)

Quick post from me - Inzi, when R cries like that, as though from teething, I give her a teething powder - one of those homeopathic ones - and it seems to calm her down. Have you tried them as well as Nurofen? Otherwise maybe she has stomach pains from the foreign substance of solids??

Muppet, PMSL at your post!

Stefka, weaning is for me quite intimidating, as hitherto R has done everything quite easily and calmly, but she doesnt seem to want food and it is already a bit stressful. HV suggested I cut milk feeds to make her eat solids, but that goes against the advice I've read here and elsewhere that they need the calcium etc from milk. Weaning is a minefield and I guess we all just muddle through as best we can. Being a mum is stressful at times; do come talk to us about it. It sounds like Dareh is doing well though.

Well we saw Alice and her gorgeous boys today - we've missed them!

Have a good evening everyone xx

sounds like night terrors Inzi.
My ds does the same, but not every night, only with certain triggers.
If it is night terrors, try not to wake her too suddenly, you're doing the right thing with gently soothing her, cuddles etc.
There isn;t much else that can be done unfortunatey.
If you don;t think its night terrors, maybe its something she has been eating over the last 2 weeks that may be effecting her....

sorry if this is complete rubbish, just trying to think what it could be....

I am not sure what it is exactly - lots of little things I suspect. Financial worries, worries about my career (or lack of!), concerned about DH who seems very low at the moment - I guess it is all adding up. I feel worse at night - just before bed. Perhaps that is just when I have more time to think.

I have had conflicting advice about weaning too choc. My HV said that BF after solids is fine but here people say differently. It's very confusing!

Does anyone here give their baby a supper? A couple of people I know do and said it helped with sleep. I tried it tonight but it was an awful faff. He actually went to sleep on his own for the first time ever so if he sleeps well I won't know if it is because of the supper of because he self settled.

Sleep deprivation is horrid - sorry you are dealing with that.

Is she learning anything new right now? I read once that when babies are learning a new skill it can disrupt their sleep. Like when they learn to crawl etc.

does she sleep in a dark'ish room...???
maybe she's waking as its not quite dark to signal night time sleep.....?????

Might be worth mentioning it to HV next time...

Muppet - well done at going to the gym.

Inzi - can't offer much help I'm afraid. Is it the hot weather? Anya's been a bit unsettled since the nights have been warmer - difficult to find the right combination of open windows/fan/clothing/etc. Hope things get better for you soon.

Stefka - know what you mean about little things building up - I've had similar worries recently and it can be very overwhelming. What I've tried to do is to focus on one thing at a time and make a decision, even if it's only a little one - that way I feel a bit more in control. I do it in the morning too - I think when I'm asleep my subconcious sorts out a lot of rubbish in my head so I feel a bit clearer/optimistic. Evenings are not good and 3am is terrible if I'm up with Anya. And yes, worrying about dh doesn't help - I do that too. When we talk about it though it turns out he's worrying about me because I look worried, but that's because I'm worrying about him - a daft vicious circle. About supper - I give Anya a late tea, about 6:30 - 7:00 because she has a nap late afternoon usually. Not sure whether that counts as supper - she usually goes to bed about 8:30 after a small feed. Having said that she crashed out at 7:30 tonight.

Stefka, sorry you're feeling so crap, have you spoken to your GP about it? You know we're always here if you need someone to talk to or even if you want to talk one to one my email is J20baby @ yahoo.co.uk, mail me whenever you want

Inzi-poor you!! Shannon can get like that, i wonder if Jane has tummy ache in the night? maybe try giving her one or 2 bland foods for a couple of days and see if that helps, my heart goes out to you with sleep deprivation, in fact, now that i think about it, i wonder if its the food thing that is wrong with Shannon, i give her a lot of fruit may have to calm it down a bit and see if it helps.

LLL-sorry Ben is still poorly, bet you're exhausted, hope he perks up soon.

wheres Bristol? is it near London, i may make it into a overnight thing if the kids are on hol, then i get to meet more of you, which would be lovely! saying that, i can't even get to York on time, i would prob be a week late or something.

well Shannon really is a danger to herself, dd1 was never like this, i can't take my eyes of her, she moves so fast, i was really hoping for a quiet, lazy baby this time, i know it sounds awful but it'd be so much easier to leave her in one place and her still be there when i come back, she can even climb out of her gault play nest, which is meant to be up to a year and she has a thing about things she isn't allowed like remoes, phones, cats and plastic bags, oh and her favourite thing is crawling to the wet wipes, opening them and pulling them out one by one having a taste of each one.

sorry for the moan, will shut up now, am going to try and take her swimming for the first time tommorrow, love to all that i haven't mentioned xxx

Evening all

As usual it's late and i'm tired, but I'll do me best

Thanks for supportive comments re boss - I especially liked Alices 'crock of shit', somehow Alice you have a way of finding a suitably cutting turn of phrase for any occasion. And Choc, I'd love a new job, but for now I'm kind of stuck there.

Oh, god, I can't remmeber everyone's stuff, or whose was what. I know there was talk of weaning probs and anxiety. So ...

Re weaning, I too have found it's thrown any semblence of routine out of the window. I seem to give Huw meals at different times every day. I'm still bf'ing him just as much as I was before, if not more. I was interested to hear about the lll 'sandwich' idea. What's the thinking behind that? I think we can worry far too much about these things, and our in osme ways admirable hv system can encourage that sort of anxiety. LIke Crochet said, at this stage it doesn't really matter how much they eat, so best not to stress about it. Talking of which ....

Re anxiety - I'm finding myself up and down and constantly worrying aobut money at the moment. I've never been like this before. Think it's becuase I'm planning on going part time and we won't be able to live on my part time salary and we've been very much dependent on my salary for the last couple of years as dh is freelance and his work has been rather sporadic as well as not as well paid as mine. Think it's also because I really don't want to go back to work at all. Sorry you're feeling so anxious Stefka (was it you??). Hope talking with us helps. We all feel for you and want to 'be there' even if can't help in other ways.

V impressed by all the crawling and pulling up action going on here. I notice it's the girls who are up to all this while the lazy boys are still lounging around expecting everything to come to them !!!

What did I do today? Well, I can't recall tbh! Except the last hour or so, which I spent watching the apprentice - my new favourite programme!

Oh, and Bristol Zoo - we'd be up for it for sure.

Night all

A x

Wow - you guys are amazing! So much support! It's put a smile on my face.

I haven't been to the GP yet. I am hesitant to go because I am worried about taking meds. I have had them in the past but I don't want them to interfere with BF and I am not keen on it being on my medical records. I get cross with myself because I feel I should just be able to stop feeling this way. I know that's daft though.

Inzi lunch would be fun! I don't know the gyle. I know it is in Edinburgh. Is it easy to get to by public transport? Thanks for pointing out that thread btw - I hadn't seen it.

Sorry you are struggling with anxiety too yourlonglostpal. I think the whole work/home issue is horrible. I wish there was money for everyone to do what they wanted to do.

Hey muppet - how often are you going to the gym? I am really trying to go more - it's hard to find the energy though. Are you watching I'd do Anything? I am addicted to that show!

Hello!
Just time for a quick post I hope before DS wants some food...
Stekfa - sorry you are feeling a bit low. I find it v hard sometimes to do all the real life things I should do (sorting out work, childcare, cleaning, cooking etc) and balance this with looking after DS and making sure he is growing and developing well.

He has 5 bfs (6am, 11, 3, 6, 9pm) and 2 meals a day (12noon, 7pm), plus he has been waking for bf at 12am or 3am as well recently (Crotchet - made me feel better that M was doing a middle of the night feed, as I thought I had something wrong) - HTH. I bf him when he's cranky (like now!) and give him food when I eat.

Inzi - DS wakes like that as well. we also try the teething powders, and usually find re-inserting his dummy helps. otherwise i have to feed him!

Well, we are going swimming for the first time later - not sure how I feel about this, i hope DS likes it....

Love to you all

v. quickly (M is demolishing a catalogue, and although I am all for blw, I'm not sure that paper should be one of her staples! )

Stefka - try your gp, you will be surprised - I was worried about being on medication too as I was desparate to carry on bf ... I've been on sertraline since December - it's fine to bf whilst taking it.

Also, try working with your breathing when you get anxious (am going to sound all hippy-ish now!) - try reverse breathing - as you breath in, pull your stomach in , then as you breath out, relax your stomach, and pull up on your pelvic floor. I find it very calming ... whether because of any blah blah, or just because it gives me something other than woryying to think about, I'm not sure!

Right, am going to wrestle the catalogue off M!

helloooooo!

Am typing one handed as My friends niece woke Shannon so she wants a cuddle but wont go back to sleep, we went swimming for the first time and Shannon loved it, she kept trying to get away from me in the water and then when i got in the shower, she quite happily played on the shower floor, even with the shower water going on her, till i had finished washing my hair, i then held her under it and got her washed, the only time she whined was when i got her dressed. oh i can't type like this, arm killing will try and get on later xx

Hi all,

I have not posted for ages. Real life has been getting in the way of MN.

DD2 is thriving. I last had her weighed 2 weeks ago and she was 15lbs 4ozs. She loves her food and usually wolfs down whatever I give her.

I will try to read what everyone else has posted but can't promise to remember what you have all said.

Stefka ? Well, I have been there and I?d like to tell you of a few things that helped me?

You mentioned that your anxieties are greater at night, this is, I think, because all day we have focused on others and their needs and our own thoughts can get pushed aside as we just get thought the day. At night we have put the babies to bed and have space and time for our thoughts to go mad and they quite often do. I remember sating to my GP that if I could just unplug my brain so I could go to sleep and then plug it back in in the morning that would be so much better. What I did was to have a pad by my bed in which to write all my thoughts down however random as they are better down on paper than whizzing around your head. This also helps you to maybe tackle them in the cold light of day. Night time is quite, empty and still and when you look out of the window you see everyone else has their light off and is doing what you most want to do with effortless ease, this makes the anxiety worse in my case.

Another thing is to have a bedtime routine of your own. We spend ages trying to get our own lo?s in a routine as it helps them know when they are going to go to sleep and also helps them to get to sleep yet we don?t do this for ourselves! Pick a time you?d like to be in bed for and then spend the hour before winding down. Perhaps have a bath, hot milk 20 mins of reading then lights out. Do this for a few nights and then you will be sending your own body subconscious and conscious signals that you are going to go to sleep soon. This helped me but did take a while, this also gives you a bit of you time every day which is another good thing.

I notice you?ve used the dreaded should. This is common with motivated, intelligent people who are struggling a little with a change in their lives, in this case your lovely lo. You should be able to switch off, to make a decision, to cope with everything, to go back to work, to find a job you. I felt I should?ve been able to cope, I should?ve loved my baby as ?normal? mothers did, I?d previously coped with 17 absolutely lovely but very nutty children so why was 1 baby foxing me?
My psychologist said she?d noticed that I often used should. could and would in sentences when I first started speaking to her, this is the pressure we are placing on ourselves.

Another thing that helps is exercise. If you?d rather not take AD?s I can understand that. Exercise releases those happy endorphins that naturally make you feel good. I was told when I was low to try to get out everyday even if it was just to pop to the shop to buy a newspaper. I got to the point that I was anxious about even going out with ds 1 and therefore didn?t, this was a self compounding situation as the more I avoided it the worse my anxiety became which made going out a nightmare which reinforced my anxieties and became a self fulfilling prophecy. (Not meaning to get all doom and gloom but you can see how it happened)
I now try to exercise twice a week and am starting to feel good about it. I was soooooo proud of myself last night as I was motivated and went out.

Career wise ?If you had no children where would you want to be? What would you be doing? What do you want to be doing in 5 years? I sat down with dh and worked out a kind of a plan (God laughs at those who make plans but hey, I?m a perfectionist, I need to plan!!) It was the first time in ages where I?d actually thought what would I like to be doing? We then made a rough plan of what I can do between now and then to get to where I want to be. A sort of life appraisal for me even tough I am not working at the mo. Yes it?ll take time but I finally feel that I matter, my opinions on my career matter and it?s (my career) being taken seriously. DH was always supportive but didn?t realise how I felt until I actually told him. It?s out of my head and on paper (I told you I?m a planner?) I feel I will make it happen as it?s been said, it?s real IYKWIM.

That was long! Sorry! I hope some of what I?ve written can be of a little use to you
x

Well, we had a fab day. The circus was amazing, there were acrobats, jugglers, trapeize artists who played the violin whilst standing on one leg, horses that rolled onto their sides then sat on their bottoms like people ect ect ect. Ollie loved the live band an the singing, he's like his mummy in that he loves rough and ready fol music. (My final dissertaion for my degree was 'The History of the Canals As Told Through Songs' I know you're yawning but remember I was living on a narrowboat at the time!)
Henry was so enthralled by the whole thing -especially the lady stood behind us in fish net tights both boys were exhausted by the time we got back but went to bed happily.

If you fancy a peek here's a link -they tour

I am trying to find a children's proms to take them to but I don't seem to be able to find one. Ollie loves music and loved sitting on my lap when I used to play the piano and sing to him and he epecially loved having a bash himself, must start doing that with Henry....

Am going to go off to bed now as I've got an exercise session at 11 which I hope doesn't involve the stairs

love to all
x

Inzi - I found this on night terrors. We bring Ollie downstairs when he has them as we've learned that he just won;t wake up in hisbed but is deserately upset and sometime thrashing about. Once he's clamed down and awake and talking we gently put him back to bed. They last for about 3-6 nights and then we get nothing for ages, even months. Nothing appears to cause them and they disppear as quickly as they arrived. It's really tough I know so huge sympathies for you and DH.

muppetgirl - there's a series of Children's proms in Cardiff - there's the tiddly prom, the primary prom, and the children's prom

let me know if you fancy going, as I'll bring Rhydian too!