January 08 shiny new - year babys , tired mums and dads!

[lilyloo]

Will that do

oh and no ds wasn't fine he moaned virtually all they way

Lilyloo - got really teary when I read your DH had got the job and that he was emotional - gosh getting all weepy again thinking about it, blame the bf-ing hormones . Really hoping that things improve for you guys, and sorry he's had to put his dream of working for himself on hold.

Barristermum - cerys is lovely, so adorable in her pink pjs. Good luck with going back to work - at least you know she's with someone you fully trust.

Mixedmama - sympathies on the IT clueless colleague. At least you only have an hour with her, so hopefully won't be too irritating.

Susiemj - congrats on making the big leap to be a SAHM, and hope you manage to resist more shopping for your friend! So tempting isn't it!

Gingeme - any success on coat?

Well, today, la principessa decided she didn't want me out of her eyeshot. Kept crying and whinging until we fled the house and I walked her to the library (about 40 mins walk each way)...we got there and suddenly she was all smiles and excited shrieking (especially when I was waving her up and down). They're very baby friendly though so no-one told us to shush

Anyone else having to decide when they're going back to work? I spoke to my boss today and I had originally said July, but if the summer's nice (looks promising so far) would like to make the most of it.

Another gorge day here, went to meet an old work colleague for coffee, but when we got home the dog had pooed everywhere in the living room, in 4 years he's only done that once before - only because had an upset tum. Felt traumatised after clearing up doggie diarrhoea - thank goodness for my VAX machine.

LO woke at 12 and 5am last night, but didn't take proper feeds, just comfort nibbles. maybe i should just try to resettle him?

DH birthday tomorrow, have just got him a Corrie cake from Asda! We are having a BBQ so hope it stays fine. D hand DS are currently kipping together on the sofa it's very cute!

I cried this morning whn they showed the babies in Burma on the news.

Hi all, Barristermum, how can you bear going back , Nicky, you too soon then? Being self-employed as barristers does not help I suppose.

Had a rather full on few days. Wednesday I noticed the tip of my little finger was infected and really painful. DH said better have it seen to if not better tomorrow. Fed Nathan at 4.30am and noticed it very angry, and there seemed to be a line on my hand. Am self confessed hypochondriac so told myself to shut up and go to sleep. Could not settle and 5.50 woke DH and said I think my hand needs seeing to. In daylight saw a nice snaking red line from the finger, over the hand down the wrist all the way to the elbow. Uhoh. By 6.30 we were in the car to the out of hours doctor (who was fab) with a bemused baby in tow, still in his jammies and having had his meds pushed down his throat an hour early. Home again by 7 with antibiotics. Typical, have escaped mastitis so far and have to have strong antibiotics for an infection in my finger. Thank God the red line is gone now and the finger nearly back to normal. Nathan was unsettled all day probably picked up on my nerves, plus every time he tried to do a nap in my arms someone rang the doorbell (two removal guys and the postman) plus we insisted on dragging him to the church where dh has been on placement as they wanted to do a goodbye thing. He managed to smile at most of his fans (Nathan has a whole fan club there) and breastfeed in the prayer room, but he was exhausted and after feeding at 8.30 he only woke at 1.30 and again at 5.45.

Today went shopping. dh noticed I am gaining instead of losing weight, comfort eating etc. I told him I felt so huge and lousy and not having any clothes that fit/flatter made me feel awful. He encouraged me to go shopping. I asked if he had tried that with a pushchair and fretting baby. So he decided to come with me. If you knew how much he hates shopping you know how much he loves me . So I have some new clothes in a far too big size, but they fit and I feel a lot better. Found a shopping-parents-with-babies drop in in a church hall in town where I could breastfeed and we also managed lunch at pizza express, although Nathan lost patience half way. Nathan is asleep now, knackered again, as dh insisted on not taking the push chair but carrying Nathan all the time. He said he had not realised that Nathan cold not rest that way. Ah, we live and learn

Aaaargh, what a mammoth post, sorry!

Evening ladies.
No coat but lots of other goodies I was told its the wrong time of year to buy a coat. Do they not realise the weathers going tits up again on Tuesday.
Lol susiemj Just fancied a change from matching my kids
Barristermum you have the daughter Ive always wanted she is sooooo beautiful. Just like a china doll. Might swap her next time we meet.....
justkeepswimming my two big boys are 15 months apart. ds3 and ds4 are 2 and a half years apart and ds4 and ds5 are 15 months apart. I think thats right. My ex emailed some pics of my big boys taken yesterday on ds1's birthday. He looks so grown up. He is a handsome young man
Fragolina George is doing that too. Its never happened before. DH took him to change him in Pizza Hut, I decided against Weight Watchers by the way, and said when he bent down to get a clean nappy out the bag he realy cried and strained to see if he could see him. If I leave him in his bouncy chair and go to the kitchen he realy wails as soon as I come back hes fine.
Oh my friend has leant us her door bouncer thing. George absolutely loves it. Trouble is ds4 thought it would be great fun to try to swing it don't think George was very impressed when he clonked his head on the door frame.
Ah well he better get used to it.
Gosh a rather long post wasn;t it?
Im easy on meet up dates for that weekend as dh has a long weekend so you decide.

Sorry madmouse x posts

Hi not-so-Gingeme

Nathan slept from 8.30-11.45 and then till 5.10!!!

Then pood in the nappy I just changed and changing the second nappy finally made his overfull tummy decide enough was enough so he spat over my shoulder on the floor (not a lot thank goodness) .

then right through dad giving his meds until 8.20. (Anyone elses baby faaaaaar too excited in the morning to eat properly? Napping now after more than an hour of play.)

Hi guys, just a v quick post as parents here and they and Russ are all looking after Cerys while I "work" for case on Monday. So shouldn't really be on mumsnet .
Thanks for lovely comments on piccies - am so proud. Feeling a bit calmer about work - have to return and figure sooner she sees it as norm the better and am really enjoying the case so am ready for work - just not leaving her. But the longer I leave returning the harder it would be to build practise back up, so sure making right decision - just feels hard .
Sorry for your scare madmouse - glad your dh so supportive.
Chuckling at george's need to toughen up early gingeme.
Lily - pleased DH got job already tho like frag v moved by his regrets - he will be so much more relaxed over coming months tho' for having done this.
Susie - bravo on decision that's right for you - am shocked others were judgemental -as you say - noone else's right to sit in judgement.
Enjoy BBQ Ange - def weather for it here.
Anyway - love to all.

Hi can I join you guys? I had my ds on 2nd Feb and I can't find a post natal thread for February!

hello horseygirl course you can. your baby is only a day younger than my ds

Thanks Frag LOL at 'la principessa' Martha won't let me out of eye sight too at the minute, makes getting things done a nightmare! If you can afford to take July off i would esp if it's a good summer.

Ange hope your enjoying the barbie and you haven't had too much wine did dh like his cake ? Hows the dog ?

MM hope the finger is better soon and well done to dh for taking you shopping , what a lovely gesture! Do you find your very hungry still bf, i can't stop eating

Gingeme shame about the coat but weather looks to be fine until at least Wed here so no rush! Poor George they really do have to roll with the knocks don't they!

Thanks bmum , your right i am sure he will be a few inches taller when the weight of the world is taken off his shoulders, he actually seems happier this weekend already. I know it's hard to make the decision to go back but you need to do what's right for everyone Cerys will do fine and you can be a fabby mummy when we are all willing on bedtime when we have had enough

Welcome Horseygirl
How are you finding things? Is ds your first?

Well am hoping Martha going to be better tonight as she has been much more settled today and had her 6pm nap which means a nice bath and a full feed before she falls asleep rather than being too exhausted to feed. She was up at 5.30 this am doing a poo so i am v.tired tonight!

Some help ladies it's my bf 30th birthday next week any pressie ideas on a small budget ? She got me a spa and pamper session when we went away for my 30th last year when i was pg ( was it that long ago!)

horseygirl just seen this but please stay here if you want to

Well girls, I am thoroughly depressed. Things with DP are still bad (so much for the change he promised me) i've got buggar all money so am probably gonna have to go back to work and am terrified of missing when DD does something new. I went swimming yesterday and looked at myself in the mirror I always thought I looked okish.

I want to leave DP but know if I try he will make life a living hell. I don't know what to do.

oh lucky ((hugs)) for you.
sounds like there are a few issues getting mixed together:
money
DP not helping with DD
body image (i know the feeling )
sleep?

leaving DP? firstly why would he make life a living hell??? and secondly you were talking about ttcing number 2 not that long ago so are things between you really that bad or are the other issues getting on top of you?

going back to work could be a good thing - rest from chidcare, feeling independent, more money obv.
maybe you are feeling a bit stir crazy after 3/4 months looking after a newborn on your own?
i know i have gone through stir crazy moments, the trick is trying to recognise it before it gets out of hand, have a night out/weekend away/whatever works...

hth

ah girls thanks 16 week growth spurt hadnt heard of it.

She isnt eating any more than usual and if she wakes in the night i dont feed her i just resettle and sleep.

She just is stuffing her hands in her mouth like a mad woman and biting down i wonder if little teeth are on the way

Lucky I hate to suggest this but what about a trial seperation just so he can realise what he would be missing out on? Though when I split from ex p he suggested this and I said no its all or nothing. He was the sort of guy to promise me the world and gave me bugger all. But I do have two handsome ds's from him .
Realy don't know what else to suggest. Don't stay with him for babys sake though as that will just make her life miserable. Ive never understood people who say they stay together for the sake of the children tbh.
As for body image Ive never looked worse and now I can't hide behind my big winter coat I feel it all the more. Some days I just think hey ho Im a Mum of 5 and not that young anymore Im entitled to look like this other days I think Oh My God I look like a fat frump and want to hide away
Sleep, well you don't realy get back on track with that till dc are atleast a year old Im afraid. Even then you will get the disturbed night due to teething,colds etc.
Not helping realy am I ?
Think your gonna have to decide something soon though for your sanity.
Just remember were all here to listen/read and supprot you the best way we can x

lucky you mentioned in an earlier post about going to your mum. can you do that for a week, get her to do night feeds and get some sleep see if it clears your mind.

Thanks for all your msgs girls.
I could go to mum's she'd have me but DP wouldn't have me doing that.
He'd make life hell if I tried to leave him. Custody battles etc etc, he's always said he could never be a weekend dad (although that's more than he is now)

Body image i'm trying to sort out, I was alway ok with my body but then I hardly ever went swimming so that's prob why i was ok with it! lol

Sleep, I'm used to and it is kinda getting easier she doesn't feed in the night anymore just wakes up winges abit then goes back to sleep.

I think it's just everything on top of me, the house, DP, DD, me, it's just too much but i'm trying to take it step by step and ignore as much as I can.

Also ladies - now its getting hotter are you giving water to your babes? How much should be given and I assume that it shouldn't replace normal feedings.

hello everyone- it's been a coupleof weeks!

Lucky hope things get better, have you had a chat with your HV? I had a nightmare with mil a couple of months back and I know its not the same but it was affecting me and dh so badly that I needed to vent to someone who wasn't connected to the family. I found that she listened and didn';t intervene but helped me sort out the main cause of the issue. Things can sometimes get too much, take some time out whether it be going to the prk or even listening to some up beat music. Me and dh went aay for the night last night to a wedding and it did us the world of good haven't put the little bean down since we got home from picking her up but we had the opportunity to be becky and arran again, although I missed her like hell and went to bed at 10pm so today would come quicker!
Try writing down all the things you love about your DP and why you are with him, against all the things that make you want to bite him, maybe you could work through these things together?

Re: body issues- stuff them, I used to be a size 8 with nice tight skin, I'm not now but every stretch mark on my body is seen as a baby medal, look what your body has done! It's truely amazing, I make myself look in a full length mirror every morning naked and concentrate on the bits I like, even if they are only on my face!

You are a wonderful mother xxx

also re: water- Ruby is still be bf but she refused my frozen ebm yesterday at my moms so had formula, my mom gave her a little water but apparently if you are bf they don't need it.. not sure why!?

Nicky6 have you tried the teething salts from Boots? Its a bit of a chore trying to get them in Ruby's mouth at first but now she loves them, settles their tummy too fro all the extra swpit they make when teething x

Nicky, Alek definitely teething and does the frantic chewing of hands and dribbling all day if he is having a bad day with them. Like today in fact, he has been dead grumpy, he also woke 4x in the night so I have been overtired and tearful myself today! Just one of those days! I use the Anbesol liquid - you can rub on gums and it is much better than Calgel. Also he has his dummy in more than usual and chowing on it seems to help him, I did get those gummy teethers that are a bit like dummies but he doesn't like it as much.

BBQ was great tho' I had one glass of cava and went to bed at 11, leaving everyone else partying round the chiminea til 1am.

EVerything seems worse when you haven't had enough sleep Lucky. To tell the truth I'm still festering about what DH put me through before LO was born, and our relationship has suffered, but we are too caught up in taking care of DS to attend to "us" at the moment.

WHy wouldn't DP let you go to your mums for a couple of days Lucky? tell him it is just to recharge your batteries and will do you the world of good?

BF ladies I lost a few pounds initially but haven't lost any more since as I still have a huge appetite too. Have tried to cut down on the naughty foods though it is really difficult! Some of the women at my BF group go to Weight Watchers in the village - you get extra points if you are BF. I might go along; it's expensive but there is the social aspect too.

PS KT the tommee tippee HQ is a couple of miles from where I live in Northumberland!

bluebell, you do not have to give water as long as you breastfeed on demand, so the baby can have quencher milk (foremilk) whenever they are thirsty. Basically with the bottle you do not have this foremilk.

Sorry that your trouble with dp is continuing Luck, it seems you do love him a lot .

My dh is the other extreme. Victim of an abusive stepfather and rather a perfectionist himself he is hellbent on being the perfect dad and feels he is making a mess of it. Nathan often ends up screaming when I leave them alone (to be honest I think he is a mummies boy and used to having me around that is all) and it came to a head yesterday when dh decided that the best thing for all of us was for him to stay away from Nathan. Became a bit of a crisis with dh being very angry with himself and acting like I had not seen in 10 years (when he tried to break of our engagement 'for my sake')and in the end he broke down and all the emotions came flooding out. At some point all three of us were crying. I feel that I have underestimated how difficult this would be for dh, who is terrified that he will be like his stepdad and Nathan like him. It was all very cathartic in the end and I think it really will help, as dh now feels more able to talk about things. He finds it really hard to cope when Nathan just cries and won't shut up. He seems to think that I am some sort of mother-saint and that I never want to plonk our dear son in a cold bath or on his bum in the garden. 'But he is a baby' he said, err yes, but no angel. I tried to convince him that crying is hard to deal with, and that Nathan can be relentless when he decides to go into meltdown, and I think I am getting there, as I heard dh tell Nathan that he was being plain impossible and vile . Some way to go, but we have been together for 11+ years so we will survive this too.

Hello all - came back from Center parcs last night Was meant to come back today, but felt we'd "done" it, and couldn't face all the traffic on changeover day!

Also missed my kittens

Had a lovely time, although it wasn't as good as I thought it would be. We went for some lovely woodland walks, although I was a bit disappointed that they were just around the backs of other peoples' lodges! The pool was far too crowded for Ben to enjoy any swimming, and the main problem was that the children's pool seemed to be a thoroughfare for everyone else, so he got splashed a lot.

I did get a good bit of "me" time though, and went for a two hour horse ride that was great fun, although I'm really aching now!

Sorry so many people are having troubles with their DPs - I think we've all been there in some way recently. A new baby in the family changes relationships in a lot of ways - I guess we're all just getting used to that!

Madmouse - interesting what you say about your DH and Nathan - Ben is the same with my DH. He just won't settle, and often cries and whinges for ages. There's no way DH can put DS to bed as it always ends up in a meltdown, which is frustrating for all involved - it means I can never get an evening to myself, and DH feels rejected by DS.

Ben is being very high maintenance at the moment. It took me ages to get him to have a nap this morning, then when he finally fell asleep, the phone rang which woke him up after only 10 minutes. He's now wide awake again, but very demanding. He wants to be under his baby gym / on the floor because he wants to roll over, but he doesn't actually want to be on his tummy, and hasn't worked out how to roll front to back yet, so he ends up crying. He wants a lot of undivided attention - if we're watching tv while he's in his bouncer, he'll ofen whinge until we sit next to him and talk / play with him. Ditto if we leave the room - he'll cry until he has company again.
This morning was a prime example - sat in his jumperoo happily playing with me in the room. I leave the room to take dishes to the kitchen, he starts to whinge - I come back, all OK. I see if he wants to play with one of his favourite toys, he completely ignores it. I put it down on the sofa, he then spends the next two minutes frantically reaching out for it, looking at me, looking at the toy. I give him the toy, he throws it on the floor. Repeat previous steps, I leave the room, he cries. Don't get me wrong, I love him absolutely to bits, but my God he's hard work sometimes!!!

Right, as me and DH have the day off today, and it's a lovely day, we'd better decide what we're going to do

Morning ladies. Yes babys crying can be hard for the most experienced of parents. I remember just a few weeks ago getting out the bath because George was crying and crying and crying and DH ended up shouting at him 'will you shut up?'. Scared the hell out of me because DH is such a placid man as far as children are concerned. He ended up saying 'I'll have nothing to do with him, he hates me, you bring him up'. It is a very hard adjustment to make weather its your first or your 5th. All babies are different thats for sure.
Well George had his first taste of baby rice this morning and ate a whole two spoonfulls. I am well impressed as none of the other boys liked it. What was left Edward finnished off Like I said every baby is different
George slept longer last night too but I think it was due to a very busy day we had yesterday. He slept from 8-5am had a bottle had a little chat and play in his cot and went back to sleep till about 8. I feel almost human. Hope he will miss that night bottle out altogether once the rice gets a bit more.
I took abottle of cooled boiled water out with us yesterday for George and tried him with it through the afternoon but he wasn't that bothered. Once his eating is a bit more established I shall give him some diluted baby juice.
Well not doing much today. Think well have a rest from the sun. All came home looking a bit pink yesterday.
Have a good day all. xxx