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The March-ers 2019 - Baby Talk #3

533 replies

Angelmiracle · 07/08/2019 11:07

Thread 3 mamas

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melissa112 · 24/09/2019 11:09

@WhatALearningCurve thanks for sharing about the monitor. We've decided to check less often as we were just waking him. We do every half hour unless I see him clearly moving, as in last night he rolled onto his side, hit the bars with his hand a few times then rolled back onto his back and fell asleep so I left it another half hour. I figure overnight I wouldnt be able.to check on him so much when hes in his own room.

@Jenlou1992 sorry to hear you are struggling. I would say continue with your plan to swap over to his own room despite the issues you are having. Purely my own experience, we haven't made the move through into his own room overnight yet but from 7pm to dream feed he's in his own room in the cot. He sleeps so much better than when he was downstairs with us. We never even had the tv on when he was down there or spoke much to avoid waking him as he became a really light sleeper after 4 months, so not sure why he sleeps so much better but he rarely needs us after 7:30, we just check on him regularly. And as others have said, you have done so amazingly well practically doing this alone.

@Brobot so sorry to hear about your cousin, how awful. In terms of your progress it sounds like things are going well despite the last update. Maybe two steps forward one step back, but very positive that hes accepting the dummy.

@Cardboard33 glad you've come through the waking at midnight then every 90mins phase! That must have been exhausting. We're finding the opposite in that we're having more poos here but they are more watery, probably due to the water...he loves it! Weaning in general is going...meh. hes doing really well but he really gagged quite spectacularly on some peach skin yesterday. He was silent but red so signs for gagging and also choking. I stood up and was just about to drag him out to hit his back when he pushed forward this bit of skin. He had had peach earlier in the day and did gag on it but I didnt want to avoid it so gave it again for tea. Its massively ruined my confidence. All other times I've been sure its been a gag and not a choke. I did want to give up BLW altogether but I'm going to try a few days with things like omelette and avoid any fruit with a skin on. If I still feel like this (literally awake most of the night feeling teary) then I'll switch to traditional. Somehow? Not sure how to do that when he's been doing BLW for a few weeks. How do you find the gagging or have you not had much?

He's still with us overnight but starting to try and pull himself into a sit by himself now. He just tries to almost do a sit up but I think once he knows he just has to hold the top of the snuzpod he'll have to move out. Particularly as like yours he just loves to stand all the time so dont think itll be long before he pulls up to a stand too. How are you finding weaning now you've moved to softer things?

HidCat · 24/09/2019 21:20

@Brobot I'm so sorry to hear about your cousin. xxx
Don't be too disheartened that baby took a step back, you now know it is possible but sometimes baby needs comforts.

@Sheeni I usually stay home if there's a sign of illness but most people don't. Good luck with the sleep consultant!

@AssumeItWasSomethingClever Hope you're having a nice break.

@melissa112 we had similar with spinach last night. They love to save some food in their cheeks / roof of the mouth don't they!

Well, little Missy is having her induction in nursery tomorrow afternoon. Hubby and I are having a lunch date whilst she's there which will be really nice. I'm looking forward to that but I'm so not ready to be I back to work 😢.

Random thing on my phone - the text keeps turning white so hopefully when I press post you'll all be able to read this 😂

Sheeni · 25/09/2019 09:13

@Melissa112 We just started with the BLW about a week ago and we really aren't super consistent yet, but I'm also a bit hesitant about the BLW. I think both me and my LO are finding it quite frustrating most of the time.
I feel like he's not happy to use his hands if I'm not using mine to eat the food. Like, he's happy to have some sweet potato fries in the restaurant, as he sees us eating our fries and burgers with our hands. But when I tried to get him to eat avocado and eggs with his hands whilst I ate mine with cutlery and he was really cross with it. But when I mashed the avocado and gave him the pre loaded spoon, he was happy to eat it. 🤔
I've had such a rough night, couldn't fall asleep, which is not great when I have a cough from the stupid cold the whole family now got from my LO. It's not easy to not cough so you don't wake the baby sleeping on your chest, when there is a freaking heavy baby sleeping on your already struggling chest! 😑

Brobot · 25/09/2019 19:55

Yesterday it was raining here and decided I needed to get out of the house so took Mr Grumpy McTeething to a shopping centre for a wander around. I walked down an aisle in a shop and spotted a lady looking at something.. Then a few seconds later I notice a little baby carrier on the ground beside her and we struck up a conversation. Her little one is 3 months. My takeaway from this encounter was.... How the fuck did she look so calm and well put together?! Why is it that I still look like I've got a 2 week old baby ie never showered, hair done, minimal makeup, etc?? It then transpired that this is her 3rd child. Someone explain to me why I find everything so hard and others seem to just roll with it with no problem?? Now, don't get me wrong, I am aware that obviously I have only witnessed a snippet of this woman but it seems to be every new parent I meet! It's as if I should have everything perfected by now or at least have found some kind of system but I haven't. Honestly every single day is such a struggle and when I open my mouth I feel like I only have negative things to say. I know I haven't had the easiest child or mothering experience but I genuinely do not understand how people function with more than one child. The thought of having to do all this with a toddler at my feet is impossible to me. Sorry to rant. And I know it's nothing to do with anything you guys were talking about lol. It's a lonely business all this.

Sheeni · 26/09/2019 02:01

@brobot As per usual, I could have written this myself. However, I do have some mum friends who are also struggling. It's usually those with reflux babies.

We are starting the sleep training tonight. It's really hard, and it's difficult to accept that I'll be losing my morning cuddles in bed, but it's definitely the way forward. I have a terrible cough and none of us would get any sleep tonight if he would sleep on me.
I'm not even allowed in the room for the first two nights, it has to be my husband sitting there. My hero. It took 50 minutes of crying for the first stretch of sleep and I don't know how he managed that without picking him up. I was ready to go in there a few times, but reminded myself why it is so important for all of us. And he fell asleep. And it only took him 40 minutes next time. And almost no time at all after the feed now!

Sheeni · 26/09/2019 13:20

Ladies, I can't believe I'm writing this. It seems to be working. He's now in his own room, as I can't sleep in the same room as him. He only fed twice at night (he used to go on and off every two hours at least, even more in the early morning hours). Woke up a bit early, but that's OK. We're having nap no.2 right now, he only took 8 minutes to fall asleep and transitioned between the sleep cycles with just 5 minutes of slight crying. I'm still feeling like I'm dreaming (this is partly because I'm really sleep deprived - the cold/cough in combination with a huge sleep change resulted in a bit of insomnia). I was actually able to talk to my husband for longer than 3 minutes without being stressed out because the baby was crying. I can't believe I might have some of my own time back soon. Obviously this might all go out of the window in the next couple of days, but I'm so happy to have an actual plan that gives me some hope!
Unexpected benefits - I now have a little bit of expressed milk, as he's not constantly snacking at night. He also seems to be a bit happier to be left alone for a little while. We actually managed to move the furniture in bedroom and nursery around with him playing on his playmat quite happily.
Mind blown. 🤯

Brobot · 26/09/2019 15:37

@Sheeni omg I'm shocked and delighted at your progress (although the thought of him crying for 50 then 40 minutes tore me apart and I'm not sure I could do it). I'm so in awe of you right now. The problem I have is that Elliot doesn't settle at all for my husband so I'm not sure he would understand that it's sleep time if he sat in with him instead of me. What do you think?

Sheeni · 26/09/2019 21:51

@brobot My LO didn't settle for my husband either and that's ok. The point is the baby is learning to settle by themselves. The parent in the room is for very occasional and limited comfort (I'm talking one word sleep cue and gentle stroke for few seconds every few minutes at first). He did actually settle with me in the room for the third nap. I was worried about it, but he did it!
Those first 50 minutes were awful, I was just sitting downstairs repeating to myself why we're doing this (our marriage

BadBadBeans · 26/09/2019 22:00

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Sheeni · 26/09/2019 22:08

Gah, posted by accident...(... My health, LO's development, his good sleep etc.) I also posted to a friendly and active mum group on Facebook that we're sleep training and how hard I'm finding it and responding to the support/questions kept me busy Blush I was really glad we got the consultant overnight, as I knew the cries were still normal and part of the process. They were cries because of the change and frustration, not pain/discomfort/torture/whatever.
I'm so proud of my little boy for doing so well. I'm glad we waited until now though, as I could see he was ready for this for the last two weeks or so only.
If you can at all afford it, get some support from a sleep consultant. Having a strict plan, tailored to our situation, gave us something to stick to and focus on. We spent a lot as we got the overnight one, but there are many who provide online (skype/facetime or even just phonecall) only services for significantly less. I'm still happy we spent the money on this instead of holiday, especially considering all of us are down with cold at the moment Grin

Sheeni · 27/09/2019 09:03

I know I'm most likely just talking to myself here, but I'm so happy right now. I actually slept almost 5 straight hours for the first time since my LO was born. Altogether I only slept 5.5 hours, but never mind that! 😂
He actually went from 22:30 to almost 4:30 without a feed! I couldn't believe it. I can't believe any of this.
I'm having major mum-guilt though, as apparently he cried twice in between (just settling himself) and I didn't even stir 😳 DH was on the monitor duty and I haven't slept properly in ages, but still, I feel like I should have woken up. And at the same time I'm so glad I didn't, as I need that sleep so badly.
Now to just get him to not wake up an hour too early and we're golden. I think he really needs that hour extra, but 6am is his excess wind time, which I think disturbs his sleep too much. But that's such a minor thing to deal with, compared to what it was just a couple of days ago! 😊

Brobot · 27/09/2019 10:22

@Sheeni I can't believe your progress. I'm also shocked lol. I wish I had the balls to do that. He gets himself in such a state though and what are you supposed to do if he doesn't calm down when you try to settle him with a stroke or reassuring word when he's like that?? I'm so glad you have been able to get some proper sleep, you've had a very hard run of it. X

Cardboard33 · 27/09/2019 15:37

@sheeni well done!! You must be so relived... Been reading your updates but haven't had time to post. What are next steps?

@badbadbeans good you're looking forward to getting started, as it were, I was the same. Now completed 1/6 weeks of radio so am just happy to get into it rather than discussing it as we've been doing for the last 2 years. What are the side effects, if any, other than the obvious? For me it's mainly tiredness and we aren't sure yet if I will fair better or worse than average due to the presence of a 6 month old in my life.

@melissa112 we are doing ok with weaning, although he def doesn't love food and lap it up in the way I've seen other babies do, he just looks suspiciously at it. Sometimes he eats it but other times he has his lips firmly shut and obviously I don't want to force feed him. He has had slight gagging but I'm ok with that although we've moved more onto purees as I don't think his digestive system was happy with the solids due to the lack of poo, so will try again with BLW in a week or so. I think we will inevitably end up doing something half way like we've done with everything else!

Does anyone else's baby seem to be sleeping loads during the day atm? We are a couple of days off 7 months and he's been sleeping for 3-4 hours during the day so it's very difficult to find time to feed, play and everything else we are supposed to be doing with him! He's def going through a growth spurt though as seemed to gain a couple of cm in height every few days the rate he's growing out of his clothes length ways.

BadBadBeans · 27/09/2019 23:19

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BadBadBeans · 27/09/2019 23:24

Anyone else's baby extra keen on standing? Mine loves it - is this normal for this age (6.5 months)? He's standing holding on to my fingers a lot, and also standing holding onto the edges of things (like the travel cot). I feel like the standing is reasonably normal, but my eldest walked at 9 months so I'm a little scared it will happen again... Not looking forward to baby proofing.

Sheeni · 28/09/2019 07:00

@cardboard33 Last night was a bit more difficult, I think it was due to me putting him in the cot instead of DH. Or it could have been the cold still, he tried to settle a few times but started crying again when he tried to breathe through the nose and found it blocked. Next three nights we'll be sitting a bit further away while he's settling and giving him more time before offering comfort. He was really good at night, woke up only three times and two of those were feeds. And he settled perfectly after those. Sadly we had another early morning. Oh well...

@Badbadbeans My LO really wants to stand, all the times, even makes some wobbly steps when hand holding. It's a bit annoying, as he's not even sitting up properly yet and I'd be much happier if he focused on that. I was told it's quite normal, but that we don't shouldn't use anything like a walker and such, as it's not good for natural development of the muscles. To be honest, our physiotherapist said we shouldn't let him stand at all, but that's specific to him and his issues (stiffness). We gave a good fight, but now he pushes with his legs whenever he's sitting up, and it's practically impossible to stop him from getting on his feet.

BadBadBeans · 28/09/2019 08:45

@Sheeni colds definitely have a negative impact on sleep; it was probably that. Good luck for tonight! Regarding the standing, I ended up googling it last night and apparently it's normal for them to start standing holding on from 6.5 - 8.5 months. It's so interesting how they don't all just follow a simple path in terms of physical development - ie your little one wanting to stand but not yet sitting! Although my eldest walked at 9 months, he didn't crawl until 8 months - you would think logically he would have been an early crawler but he wasn't at all.

Brobot · 28/09/2019 10:31

@BadBadBeans @Sheeni elliot is the same in that he is constantly standing holding our hands and yet has only just started sitting and has never even rolled from back to front!! Lol. As for the walkers, it's annoying that all health visitors give different advice because ours said they are totally fine!

Sheeni · 28/09/2019 16:15

Ok, question. Anyone else has a baby that's kinda... Don't know how to describe it... I guess clicking their jaw? My LO will rest his chin on a surface, then open and close his mouth forcefully. Does it make sense? Anyone else noticed this? He started just a few days ago. He's also "pecking" everything when on his tummy. I'm actually scared he'll break his nose. Wtf is happening? Hmm

Brobot · 28/09/2019 16:44

@Sheeni yep elliot puts his hand in his mouth and as he chomps you can hear his jaw click. He's also doing weird mouth movements constantly now lol. Exploring his abilities I suppose!

Cardboard33 · 28/09/2019 21:05

@badbadbeans yeah we are hoping that focusing on him will actually be useful as we literally don't really have time to be all doom and gloom as it's just a case of getting on with it. I was like that before anyway but being pregnant/a mum has made me focus even more on the things that I can control in my life. Not being able to pick up your kids must be annoying, although kinda like having a c section I guess? You live with your husband's family, right? Hopefully they can help you out even though I know it's not the same.

My baby is also standing up. He's been bouncing around for a couple of weeks (thanks jumperoo!) but now he's progressed to full on standing up with just one arm on the sofa for support. He can do it for a few mins at a time and also moves his feet around like he's walking, which is really scary given he isn't yet crawling.

Queenofpi · 28/09/2019 21:17

I am very late to the party, but can I join you lovely people? My little girl was born 4th March and now I'm back at work I never get to chat with similar age baby mums.

BadBadBeans · 28/09/2019 21:25

@cardboard33 Yes and I've had two C sections so I have some idea about what it might be like. But with the c section you are at least allowed to pick up your baby and with this I really won't be able to! For me the worst thing about the c section was feeling very physically separated from my eldest son, and with this I guess I will feel separated from both boys. I'll have to plan in gentle sofa snuggle time! Yes I think living with in laws will be a godsend. I wasn't very pragmatic before having children but am much more so now - you must be hard as nails now if you were already good at getting on with stuff pre-baby 😂 And regarding the crawling, some babies do just skip that stage - eek!

@Queenofpi welcome! How are you finding being back at work? X

Queenofpi · 28/09/2019 22:18

@BadBadBeans oh my it is such a change. Although as someone (can't remember who) said on here a while back, I am a much better quality mummy in the 3 hours before bedtime and a much better wife to my husband! It's helped me feel like myself again rather than just Kara's mummy. I'm still bf though, so my lunch and break times (I'm a teacher) are spent hidden in an office expressing. I'm very lucky in that we find a childminder we really like and Kara settled in straight away.

We seem to be bypassing crawling too. She's always liked being on her feet and now tries to take "steps" when she's holding onto my fingers. Good to hear we're not the only ones. (side note: my sister said "Don't let her stand up, she'll get bandy legs" 🙄l

Brobot · 29/09/2019 08:37

@Queenofpi welcome! Your little one is 2 days younger than my little boy 🙂. I'm not back to work until March as I decided to take the full year even though I'll be penniless for the last 3 months lol. I too am still breastfeeding as are a couple of others on here. I'm sure it's very difficult going back to work and I often feel very sorry for Americans etc who only get like 6 weeks off! How are you finding everything with sleeping and breastfeeding etc?