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March 2007 - even though it hasn't actually arrived, some of us have (iyswim)

998 replies

CallieNewMum · 26/02/2007 20:06

Here we go girls - Amie, Kiwi, Dixia, Flannelettepyjamas, we can start comparing motherhood notes on this one and wait for the others to arrive one by one. Although I suspect the other thread will be our home until there's critical mass. To those of you still waiting to join the post-natal people - get a move on!!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Mossie · 20/04/2007 14:22

Just to let you know, mw came over this morning, and dh sat with me while I asked her all his "is this normal?" questions. She told us it was all normal, and dh now feels a bit reassured. I think sometimes men won't listen to their partners but are happy to take the word of a "professional", iywsim.

We're off to the park now so I'll come back later!!

TheBlonde · 20/04/2007 14:56

Callie - Enjoy your bugaboo! I have yet to meet anyone who regretted buying one

We had a hellish night here. Baby was up from 1 til 5 and wouldn't settle. In the end DH put her in another room and we finally got some kip.

divastrop · 20/04/2007 14:58

kitty-ive been having the odd glass of wine but dp hates the smell of it and i feel that he disapproves iyswim,even though he probably doesnt care atall and i am still think ing im living with my mother

funnily enough,the doc i saw today is about a size 8 and obviously takes pride in her appearance,whereas the nurse at family planning was about 50,overweight,no make-up etc,which may explain why one of them was more understanding than the other

or it may be the fact i told her ive gone from smoking 2 a day to 10 a day in 2 weeks in an effort to stop eating

sazzybee · 20/04/2007 15:19

Have to go feed LO but kitty I too am having a drink every day. If even that kelly bf site says you can drink and bf and it's american, I reckon it must be alright!

piffle - I did wonder about a growth spurt - he was hard to settle yesterday too [hmmm]
He is due another one - he hasn't had his 4-6 week one yet. I might go to bed at 7 with him tonight - I'm knackered!

evenhope · 20/04/2007 16:32

I think we're having a growth spurt. DD had been feeding till 10.30pm, waking at 4ish then 7ish. The night before last she woke every 2 hours through the night, having not slept at all during the day. Yesterday she alternated between feeding and screaming. We went to the zoo- in the 2 hours we were there she fed twice. Got home at 4.30pm and apart from the odd 1/2 hour or so of nappy changing she fed more or less constantly until 1.30 am. By that time I could have swung for her. Then she slept until 9am but I woke up 3 or 4 times wondering if she'd died and the dog woke me at 5am

What is really galling is the feeding goes on till I'm really sore then she gives a massive burp and throws it back all over me.

LunarSea · 20/04/2007 16:56

Mossie - ds1 was such a pain to get off to sleep that when he did eventually go off we'd let him sleep there rather than riskk moving him. So he often slept in his wing, in he carseat, in the pushchair, etc. It doesn't seem to have done him any harm though.

divastrop · 20/04/2007 16:59

evenhope-it sounds frustrating.i think the worst thing is when they do finally sleep and you still dont get any sleep yourself cos you're constantly checking they're still breathing.

i like babies between 6 and 12 months best

Elsie is on fast flow teats now,she was on the 3 month plus ones from birth but the milk was coming out too slow.now she drinks her bottle really fast and pukes half of it back up

is drinking alcohol when ur bf equivalent to puttin a teaspoon of whiskey in the baby's bottle when ur ff?

Piffle · 20/04/2007 17:02

Kitty I like a tipple on a weekend

foxcub · 20/04/2007 18:18

Diva - my mum used to dunk my sister's teat in gin every night!!!

I like babies when they are aged 4 years!

foxcub · 20/04/2007 18:19

oooh BTW Monti has obviousoy been reading this thread as he has been SMILING AT ME all day

Mossy - did MW check your latch for you too?

DollyPopsOut · 20/04/2007 20:20

sorry for radio silene. Have been reading but too tired to post. Tilly still being a dream but I am shattered with 2 under 2 and no kip in the daytime. I am loving the BF but do feel sometimes as though the energy is being sucked out of me. Am eatin masses and mostly crap. Been drinking a glass of wime evnery night too as well, as mu reward for getting through the day and esp teeth cleaning in one piece. I am trying to pick my battles but am anal about her cleaning her teeth and she just won't. Oh well.

Sorry for all those having a tough time. IME babies so often do their own thing at this age and don't settle into any routine or pattern for a while. I am trying to go with the flow but as a naturally anal controlling person I find it hard to let go and just let them get on with. The DVD and rich tea biscuit consumption in our house is getting out of control as a result. DD1 now asks for a treat every time we get into the buggy and if we turn right out of the house she asks if we are going to the swings! If we go left she cries as it means the shops and boring things like supermarkets. It's all a bit wearing at the moment.

Sorry for the moan. Hope you all have a good weekend and I'll try to post properly soon

Love to all XXXX

divastrop · 20/04/2007 20:26

mossie-just had a nosey at your pics-how cute!

wasnt it you who gave me loads of good advice about men only being able to cope with problems they can fix,back when i was having issues with dp and my depression?

i remember being very stressed when i had ds1 cos his father couldnt understand why he was crying if he'd been fed and changed,and he expected me to be able to sort it out.of course,it was very scary cos he had a violent temper and i would be begging ds1 to be quiet.i still get edgy even now when Elsie is crying,even though dp says 'just leave her,shes only crying,you fuss too much!'(that is,when shes crying for no obvious reason).

dp and i have very similar views on raising children but the big difference is i always feel guilty about everything and he doesnt.

i want to have a glass of wine but i'll feel guilty

kittyhas6 · 20/04/2007 20:42

Diva, feeling guilty is our job!!! You're gonna feel guilty anyway so have a drink woman. Anyway why would having a drink make you feel guilty?

Dolly, I am with you on how hard it is with 2 under 2, I'm sure Diva is too, we've both benn mad enough to have gone there already with our first two!!!. It gets easier though, honestly it does.

Foxy, how lovely for you to be smiled at all day. I can't wait for that

divastrop · 20/04/2007 20:42

dolly-how old is your dd1?i didnt realise she was just a toddler still.i have to firmly hold dd2 while i clean her teeth(all 7 of them).she has hissy fits when we're out but it doesnt bother me.dd1 was a little cow from age 1-2 and i used to get really stressed with her paddying,but now shes 8 going on 13 and has pre-pubesent tantrums,which involve threatening to phone childline and accusing me of 'child abuse'(cos ive sent her to her room or told her to tidy up),my 16 month olds' tantrums just pass by unnoticed.

oh,and TO ALL THE MOTHERS WHO HAVE TODDLERS AND ARE BF THEIR BABIES-i have much respect for you,i honestly dont know how you do it.you are far better women than me and i am full of admiration for you

CallieNewMum · 20/04/2007 20:51

Fox - important issues first - Maya Gold is the spicey one in an orange and black wrapper. I highly recommend it .

Oh my god, I know it's only a pram but I am deeply in love with my bugaboo. It pushes like a dream, lovely and springy, the baby is happy in it and DP likes it too. I don't feel guilty now! Just wish I'd bought it in the first place!

Talking of happy babies, I am yet to get a proper smile out of Jordi and am very much looking forward to it. I met another premmie mum today and her little girl who is technically four weeks older than J started smiling last week so I'm hoping within a month he might have too.

Jay, sorry things are still rough. Hang in there.

Diva, I need to get new bottles for Jordi but I want to get him slow teats cos he just sumps it down so fast, often chokes a bit and still screams at the end and I think he needs a bit more sucking time. Which ones do you use?

Mossy, DP was a bit like that too - what's wrong with him was a common question once LO started crying more. Yours will get used to it.

OP posts:
divastrop · 20/04/2007 21:22

callie-i use avent teats now(on superdrug bottles cos the avent ones are so expensive).i tried every sort of teat you could think of with dd2 and thats what i ended up with,so i used them for Elsie on the grounds that i had the whole collection of different flow rates.

divastrop · 20/04/2007 21:26

callie-i meant to say,also,that maybe hes just a fast feeder?both my ds's used to drink their bottles in 5 minutes flat,and ds2 used to get really frustrated if it didnt come out fast enough.

they both eat their tea in about 5 minutes flat now

kittyhas6 · 20/04/2007 22:15

Diva, dd3 is a great weight. Yesterday she trod on Ronnie's face and today she fell on him and they clunked heads.
Start as you mean to go on eh? Looks like it's the school of hard knocks for the little man

foxcub · 21/04/2007 09:59

Diva/dolly I hold my monster's mouths open when I clean there teeth too. I literally get them in a head lock, tell them to put their heads back and open their mouths and give their teeth a good scrub. I have crap teeth so am determined they will have good teeth, if nothing else!!

Kitty I remember DS1 standing on DD's chest when she was one months, with his fukll weight and smiling "she lokes this" I actually took her to Gp to be examined - to be told "babies are tougher than you think"

Diva I feel terribly guilty about the amount of time I spend BFing as I am neglecting the other tow, but its only for a few months I guess. Anyway its an excuse to sit down

I keep calling Monti "Montipine" (how naff is that )?

Well inspired by you lot I had a bottle of beer last night and it gave me insomnia as I haven't drank for so long.

foxcub · 21/04/2007 10:00

their teeth not there teeth

Mossie · 21/04/2007 10:11

Morning all,

Well, last night I finally snapped, dh and mil have been doing my head in with their fussing, and talking about getting into some sort of routine etc.

Okay the routine they're suggesting isn't very strict (put him to bed around eight thirty, if he cries after that go up to comfort him rather than bring him down) but as it's me who is feeding him it is me who spends most of the evening upstairs.

I know they mean well, but it does make me get a little paranoid; makes me feel a bit "ganged up on", iyswim. The mw coming yesterday solved a bit of it by saying that what I was doing was right, but dh now says he feels left out. So I snapped and shouted at him while he was on the phone to sil at about half seven, and at the top of my voice pointed out that if he wanted Bertie in bed for eight thirty he'd better get off the phone and make the tea like he promised.

Now sil is peed off with me, as she is paranoid that I don't like her, and dh is paranoid that she thinks badly of him... all this paranoia!

See the thing is, normally I am very pragmatic and take things as they come, but having hormones flying around isn't the best recipe for that!

However, last night we did scrap the bedtime routine thing and Bertie slept like a dream. I just think that a week and a half old is too early for a routine, especially while I'm demand feeding. But I say this to dh and he gets a sulk on about me making all the decisions... it's hard, you know?

Anyway enough of my ramblings.

Chocpenny lol at you eating your ds1's choccie bar. What kind of an example is that?

Sazzy what are your neighbours like? If they're the understanding type I'm sure they'll realise that you are adjusting to life with a newborn, and keep the noise down for a while.

Callie I bet your dp's Dad was made up to pay for your pram, he probably loves to be able to make some sort of contribution. Like Diva I'd never heard of a Bugaboo before I came on MN, where do you live? I think they're more of a Southern phenomenon perhaps? Up here the posh ones are Silver Cross.

Rosy / Foxy hands off my coat! Sil bought it me for either my 27th or 28th, can't remember. Haven't worn another coat since, I'll be gutted when it falls apart finally!!

Kitty yes it is a steep learning curve, especailly for dh - sounds silly, but I can come on here and get advice from you lot that have been there before, he doesn't have that, the only person he speaks to with experience of babies is his Mum, who does have a lot of great experience but everyone does things differently and I feel I would like chance to find my own way, iyswim.

Jay I'm sorry to hear you're having such a rough time of it all. I hope things get better for you soon, you sound like you're coping as well as you possibly can. {{{hugs}}}

Piffle I'll watch out for that growth spurt. Actually the mw weighed him yesterday, he has gone from 7 pounds 13 to eight pounds. That's good apparently as some babies lose weight. Still wish she'd do it in Kilos though, I can't get my head round "old money"!

I have a glass of wine every night now, it's great not feeling guilty. Diva I do wonder what it is the equivalent of, how much alcohol gets into the milk, it probably is the equivalent of putting a few drops into the formula, lol!

Dolly sorry things are getting on top of you a bit, they're bound to with two so young I suppose! {{{hugs}}} Nice to hear from you though.

Sorry for the long post ladies, just had to get stuff off my chest!

foxcub · 21/04/2007 10:17

Hi Mossy nice to see you - don't forget 6.35pm tonight!!

I think you ar tright BTW - Bertie is far too young for a routine and why should you hide upstairs with him from 8.30pm ??

You've got the rest of his life for a routine - why not just enjoy going with the flow a bit while he is so tiny?

I agree with what you say about men too - they need a dad'snet.

or maybe not....

Mossie · 21/04/2007 10:22

Yes I can imagine Dadsnet would be quite sparsly populated! Or full of Am I being unreasonable? threads about their dw/dp's being narky following the birth and asking when it will stop.

Yes I think this routine thing is madness but have gone along with it to make dh feel like he has some say in Bertie's upbringing, as he bangs on about me making all the decisions.

What age would you say to give a baby a bedtime?

LunarSea · 21/04/2007 10:38

Mossie - I'd say the time to introduce a bedtime is when he can realibly go from just before "bedtime" to just before YOU want to go to bed without being fed. It's a bit pointless otherwise if you're just going to be stuck upstairs feeding all the time.

Good night last night - Toby slept from 10:30-5.30! And this morning he's discovered that he can work his can't-be-knocked-down pirate , so he's been playing with that. Maybe I get some rest now he can play on his own, as the last couple of days he's been so alert and interested in everything that he's been wanting to be held upright so can look around almost all the time.

divastrop · 21/04/2007 10:44

mossie-i bring Elsies moses basket downstairs and put her in it when shes had her bottle after her bath,usually about 8-8.30pm cos i like to spend some time gazing at her and talking crap to her when the noisy ones are in bed.then when shes settled i leave her be and just put her dummy in if she stirs.i did the same with ds and dd2,then when they were about 3 months i would take the moses basket upstairs when they'd settled.i didn't start actually putting them to bed upstairs till about 4 or 5 months when they'd outgrown the basket and needed to go in the cot.

i have to get routine sorted asap cos i have to get up at 6.30 am to get the others to school,but i wouldnt feel comfortable putting a week old baby upstairs on their own,they need to be close to you when they are tiny.

anyway,he is your first baby,you dont need to do routines yet,you need to enjoy this time.if i were you i wouldn't be thinking about strict routines untill a few weeks before you return to work

sorry for the long ranty-sounding post,i just wanted you to know that even a routine-obssesed woman like me isnt that strict