July 2016 #2

[Bluebell20]

A new thread as we (hopefully) move towards longer sleeps and lovely little smiles!

Ouch bluebell that's a serious lack of sleep, hope that ends soon. I agree with primary - just aim for pain free and weight gain. Have you decided that the shields really aren't for you?
Not sure if this is helpful or not... One of the midwives in the hospital told me to count down from 10 when H latches on, when I get to one it should be less painful (ie not straight away) and to remember that when nips are sore, it's never going to be completely comfortable. I go back to this every time we have bad nip days!

Anyone else have a baby with noisy joints? Every time I pick him up under the armpits it sounds like his shoulders click. DH and his mum and grab have always had one dodgy shoulder and am wondering if H has inherited it? Or is it far to early to tell and this is just a baby thing? Or is he too little to be picked up this way and should I stop doing it?!

Ha ha Bluebell, everyone wants to ogle your norks! Happy to take my place in the queue too, if that's helpful. I've still got sore nips (now with little red star patterns in the middle - ouch!). Went to a great bf cafe yesterday and have learnt a couple of new positions. Basically now that jasper is 5 weeks and has head/neck/back stability, he can sit upright supported by just one hand (mine, I mean!) - so I can now sit him on my lap facing me and he finds the boob himself with his mouth. And I even have a free hand - revolutionary! Alternatively I can sit on the chair leaning back slightly (i.e. with my legs stretched out) and lie him on my chest and (after a minute or so of head-banging and boob-smooching) he shuffles down and finds the nipple. So as of now I'm ditching the "newborn" positions. No-one told me until now that babies could develop different (better!) positions so quickly. I think it might totally revolutionize my bf efforts, which until now have been excruciating and frustrating.

Bluebell - glad to hear your good news.

Beaut - hope you're taking it as easily as is humanly possible - tough times for you

Anna - hope you're doing ok?

Thom, how are you getting on? And Ellizardo? I don't think we've heard from you for a while (although apols if I've just missed it).

Hugs to all those having issues with problematic DH/OHs. Seems to be quite a few of us. And hugs also to those who have annoying/unhelpful visitors.

I know there were other people who I wanted to give a shout-out to about various things, but too much time has passed and I've forgotten who...

Sorry I haven't been active here for ages. I mentioned before that I wasn't doing so well, and unfortunately things got quite a lot worse. A week ago I was diagnosed with post-natal anxiety, and am now being treated which is great - have been feeling much much better in the last few days. It was pretty awful at its worse (episodes of all-consuming panic and fear), and very unexpected as I've never experienced anything like that before. I was also surprised to learn that pnd/pna affects 1 in 10 women - I guess people just don't really talk about it. My parents have been brilliant - I've been staying with them for the last 4 weeks (out of 5) and they've been totally looking after me and jasper. Missing my DH who I've only seen at weekends, but other than that it's been exactly what I needed. Hoping to get better enough to be back at home soon though - hopefully in another couple of weeks (although if my mum has her way it'll be longer )

Jasper is doing really well. Can't believe how much he's developed over 5 weeks. Amazingly strong legs. He's a real wriggler. Squeaks and grunts and eats and poos a lot too. And sleeps lots as well, except at night

5w+1d

Wow, that was an essay and a half - oops!

Oh bluebell, think we're living parallel lives! All so familiar, feeling a bit beside myself today...a bit loopy...I'm so hoping the BF lady tomorrow helps! I'll take pictures and DM you about latches, etc. Also happy to chat so I'll DM my phone no and I might be able to pass on some wisdom. X

Julfin glad your folks are looking after you

Hey julfin, lovely to hear from you and glad you're getting some support too x

Thank you, ladies! It's been nice following what you've all been up to and seeing baby photos. Hugs to you all, especially those who've been experiencing anxiety or depression. If anyone has been, I'm happy to chat via dm (although not sure if I can access it via the app...?) xx

Beautiful babies!!

I expressed tonight and DH fed so I've had 5 hours sleep - I feel like a new person! Hope those who are struggling to get sleep have rest soon, there's nothing worse tab feeling exhausted

julfin so glad you're beginning to feel better. You're right, it's one of these 'hidden' illnesses that people don't talk about. In the past there was such a stigma attached to it. Thankfully now we are better informed and there's greater understanding. You're not alone! It's also brilliant you've got a good support network.

Adam had his first round of injections yesterday so we had a very difficult day - he was already pissed off about something or other. He cuddled and cried for most of the rest of the day and we were preparing for a difficult night... But he was great. Did his usual 8-6 with a feed at 1! He seems back to his normal self this morning but I'll keep an eye on his tempetature.

Doc was shocked that the HV had told me to bring calpol along to the appointment and give it to him there rather than just give it to him before the appointment! Has anyone else been told this? Maybe she was worried that I'm not clever enough to work out how to use it and I might try to squirt it in his ear or something?

Place marking xx

julfin great to hear from you. Glad your feeling on the up and have a great support network by the sounds of it! Don't forget we are here too for rants and sympathy, I ask for it enough! do you lean forward so jasper is leaning back when sitting bf him? I have tried to do it but my boobs just smash his face

2 questions for everyone:

1. what do you do in the evening re baby sleeping? I.e. Is baby put down upstairs with a monitor/do you go to bed with baby/baby sleeps downstairs til you go to bed/something else?

2. this past few days Annie has ramped up the sleeping loads during the day and continuing to sleep quite well at night. I feel bad for saying it as I know how lucky I am to be getting sleep but should I be worried? When she is awake she's generally alert and happy/smiley and is still feeding/seeing/pooing lots but I'm still a bit worried about the sleep. She's probably asleep 19-20 hours a day at the moment at nearly 7 weeks old.

I keep Ben downstairs with me until I go up to bed but he generally settles between 8-10pm. He's still in the Moses basket next to me. I haven't even put the cot together yet. DD was in her own room with a monitor at about 4 months old.

Primary - jasper sometimes sleeps in rooms where we're not, for short spells during the daytime. If I'm moving from room to room a lot I don't like to keep on moving him as there's a risk I'll wake him each time. I check on him often though. And of course he's always in with me at night.

Re sleeping lots, perhaps it's because of a growth spurt? Just a made-up theory guess.

Re the feeding position, if jasper's lying on my chest then I'm leaning back slightly, with my bum at the front of the chair and my legs stretched out in front of me. If he's sitting on my lap then I'm sitting fairly upright, perhaps slightly forward, with my knees st a right angle. Does that make sense?

Question for people: how do you clean under baby's finger nails? Or don't you? I've noticed recently that they're getting dirty, which isn't ideal as they're his favourite thing to stick in his mouth!

Hope you're all having a nice Saturday!

5+2

I don't really clean the fingernails but it's not been an issue. I think the bath takes care of most of it! I use nail scissors when he's sleeping though.

The white coating on his tongue from his formula has turned a peachy pinky colour... Any thoughts what this might be?

We keep E downstairs with us until we go to bed about 10ish and DH gives him his bottle in bed before putting him down. Not sure when we'll start a proper bedtime routine and put him to bed earlier.

Nice to 'meet' you julfin and I'm sorry you've had a tough time of it with anxiety. I hope you are through the worst of it and can return home soon x

Sunday, with regard to a routine what I did with my first was have a loose routine of bath, quiet play then bottle in dim room and bed. I started this once there was a pattern to the time of her last feed and then as she got older and more mobile she became ready to settle earlier and earlier. I think by about 8 months (ish) we started routine at 6 ish so she was up to bed for bottle at 7 and asleep by 7.30. She still has the same bed time now at 3.5. I'm hoping to do the same with Ben and have already started with dim lights at night, a bath most nights before last feed then he settles soon after. I think it's easier to be led by them but it doesn't hurt to give them cues that it's bed time such as the dim lights and bath.

That sounds like the sort of routine I'm hoping for becks just thinking about how DH can have some relaxed, meaningful time with Elliott once he gets in from work at 6.30 without feeling like he has to get straight into bath/feed/bed routine. Would be good to get E into his cot earlier tho so we can eat in peace. One of us usually has to eat while wearing him in the sling to stop him crying!

Great to hear from you julfin and glad that you've got a good support network around you.

sock I've been told to take calpol to give after too. The hv was very insistent that it shouldn't be given before the jabs. Dd is only four weeks though so got a little while to wait before the jabs. Hope Adam is feeling better today.

prinary we keep dd downstairs with us until we're ready for bed and she's asleep. I wouldn't feel comfortable having her upstairs while we're downstairs at the moment. No idea how or when to start more of a routine though. Bedtime can be anywhere from 9 until 1 though. Dh has just taken over because every time she seems asleep and I put her down she is suddenly wide awake and grizzling. I'd just like a nice early night. Just one night where we can get to bed early and have our usual feed times. Never seems to happen though.

Nice to meet you too, Sunday! Sorry my first post you read was so full-on! Normally I'm more normal (I think)

Sock - I don't find the nails are getting clean in the bath. Maybe I'm being pernickety! I might try using a little nail-brush. I've just bought a baby manicure set (yes, they exist!) but that just has scissors, clippers and files (Not sure why you'd need all 3!) - no brush. Maybe a toothbrush would do the trick. Hmmm.

Just been watching brideshead revisited. Great film. Anyone else watched anything good lately? I'll be watching the last half-hour tomorrow, as Somebody woke up just now and needed feeding/changing so we had to stop. Not a bad thing, as it was after 1am!

juflin lovely to hear from you. I hope you're doing ok? It's good to talk and I wish more people would so that we know we're not in this alone. Newborn babies are such hard work it can really affect you physically and mentally. How are things going?
I'm doing ok thanks. My grief seems to have kicked in this week. I think being hormonal and tired has probably helped that! But I'm ok. Trying to just get through it best I can.

blue are you getting anymore sleep?

So Grace just doesn't stop feeding. She feeds pretty much all afternoon/ night/early morning and I'm struggling to get much sleep. She was still going at midday so DH took her and gave her some formula which she polished off be passed out! Is anyone else mix feeding? I'm thinking of maybe doing a bottle of formula at 10 so DH can do it and I can sleep. I know that this feeding frenzy doesn't last forever but I have dd1 and I can't get much rest it sleep in the day.

Hope you're all enjoying the weekend

Cheers hugely all those who offered to look at my jubblies latch! After some extensive research tho I already know it's wrong so I won't put you to the trouble!

primary Yes I will focus on pain free rather than perfect - good advice. Indians he has been checked and no tongue tie - I was sort of disappointed as I had hoped for a magic fix!

julfin those positions sound great. I am heading to a breastfeeding group tomorrow so hoping I can get shown some of them! Glad your parents are being so helpful. As an anxiety sufferer myself you have my total empathy. Has the GP offered good support?

Ruby the shields are making it hard for me to correct my latch problem so I don't think now is the time to use them - although for temporary soreness once I've got the latch sorted I can see how helpful they would be.

Cheery how did the BF lady go? I am seeing one tomorrow hopefully. And I would love to chat and swap tips!

Primary - we have a little carry cot downstairs that he sleeps in. When we go to bed he is either transferred to the Moses basket or we just take the cot upstairs and leave him in it. He is pretty much always in the same room as one of us. I even take him to the loo sometimes...

Julfin - so funny, I suddenly noticed yesterday that Ru's fingernails are filthy! A toothbrush is a good idea - I think I will buy a soft one though.

Will reply to everyone else and update you on my breastfeeding / expressing adventures later, as if I don't go to sleep now there will be no point in trying as I need to be up in 90mins to express!