Mugabe Nights: sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your (sleep deprived) pain!

[mzzzf]

New thread ladies!
Buenos are still free, the bar tab is still open and you can leave your healthy living resolutions at the door!

It is rude crafty it's no-ones business but yours whether or not you use a dummy (or bf, or any other aspect of your parenting style tbh).

However, I do find that the general exhaustion and anxiety of parenting a tiny baby does make me more sensitive to other people being dickheads. Things that I'd normally have a rant over and then forget about become massive issues.

So, if that sounds a bit like you remember - being upset about it gives her the power. Take the power back by refusing to let it get to you and treating her like the idiot that she is .

crafty I would just ignore it. I agree with slow - don't give her the power. She clearly is an idiot and if you want to slag her off anonymously here, we can agree with you

Oh very very rude!!! but don't let it get to you as slow says. Although it is the kind of thing would get to me. Your baby Your rules!!!

Mind I would say that's DS has his dummy so much that DH refers to it as his crack pipe (so inappropriate)

People are really funny about dummies for no reason. My reasons for giving one are the same as yours. My boob was perminantly in his mouth otherwise and I probably would have also given up breast feeding. That and I fear we would have been awake for six months straight now.

But it's Friday night and you've had a lovely week with your gorgeous family so don't let some gobby Moron on fb spoil it for you.

Shocker of a day for naps... DS2 has only had three 30 minute naps. Woken the first time by someone delivering an invitation for DS1, I put on my best forced smile and said thank you, think this muddled him up for the whole day. He spent from 6 till 7 being totally hyper from over tiredness. It's taken an hour in the dark to get him to sleep. Fingers crossed for a good night.

Gosh kp dips tindel haven't had one of those for years! Wonder if they still make them...

Glad you're still here fatty I wondered if some of the original mugabeans had switched to fb instead.

random good luck with the formula. Hopefully your DD will take to it well. I could never express enough so DS1 used to have ready made formula if I went out. He happily had this from DP or grandparents.

effin You definitely deserved the 'spare' egg Not so keen on cream eggs but a bag of mini eggs wouldn't last long!

That definitely is rude crafty You don't have to explain yourself, you do what is best for your DD. Best to have a rant on here, get it all out of your system and ignite her.

crafty seriously rude.
DS1 had a dummy because he wanted to suck to go to sleep, but wasn't hungry, so a bottle was out, and he hated his thumb. DS2 is the same.
DD never wanted one.

I got the opposite when DD was a baby. I got told to give her a dummy, and that I was cruel for leaving her without because ff babies need them as they don't get comforted by mum like bf babies do.
the woman who said that got laughed at. Of course she was being comforted by me. What the fuck did she think I was doing when I was hugging her and she was snuggling into my boobs while I stroked her head?!

coconut I've just been really busy this week, so finding it difficult to get on. I've been out every day except Wednesday!

Crafty how rude!! I would personally delete the comment and message her saying how you liked the photo as life has been tough at the mo and having a dummy is totally legitimate. One thing I've realised over the last six months is that everyone has an opinion on every parenting decision you make but I would Deffo delete the comment. Cheeky. DS has a dummy to sleep too. I wonder if this person has ever tried to parent a small person all day and all night...I know I had some quite rigid ideas pre DS which have now mostly gone out the window!

Happy Friday mugabeans 🙂
Frolicboy is better, I've had loads of yummy Chineese and things are looking up!

Lovely to hear about your acts of kindness loves. There are still plenty of good people in the world.
The affection towards the boobs is so funny, isn't it? Ds has had some peach purée today though. The first food since Last Saturday.

Lovely photo tindel.

Nutella and breadsticks? Mmmm coconut

I hope you're all ok random.

penguin, how rude! I would be very tempted to reply "sorry, I don't approve of judging other peoples parenting choices"
But, I think slow has it and don't give her any power by responding. and definitely don't spend all night ploughing through all her photos to find something you don't approve of
I wish Ds would take a dummy!

Thank you everyone! I'm very glad I've started joining in on here, as it was so lovely to have a rant on here as I think I was winding dh up going on about it 😂 I just thought it was so, so rude. I'd posted other photos from the day and it's quite clear she didn't have her dummy in any of them, bar this one. And even if she did, so what?!

Being a parent somehow means everyone suddenly thinks they can share their opinion on your parenting. It's ridiculous. It's just upset me because I've really struggled with being a mum as I've been physically unwell and struggled with bonding. This has been the first half term where I've been well enough to go out and do things with dh, and this week off couldn't have come at a better time as things have been tough the last 3 weeks due to other issues in our lives. So today was a really big achievement to be out of the house so long and stepping out of my comfort zone. So to be judged and criticised has upset me. I've deleted her and her comment anyway. She was an old work colleague who never talked to me on there anyway, never commented on anything I put up - until today that is!

So apart from that, today has been soo lovely. Dd slept till 4am well, apparently she niggled at 2 and 3 but settled herself (I never hear her in the night). She was a bit of a tricky pickle until getting up time, but I think we all benefited from a 4 hour block of sleep.

We went to an aquarium today. It was a bit pricey for what it was but dd loved it. I've only ever bf in public once. I have real anxiety about it and dd refuses the bottle (apart from the 1 dh gives at night) so I usually plan going out around her feeds. Couldn't today as it was a long day, and when she was niggling for food I noticed a sign saying breastfeeding welcome, please ask if you'd like a private room. So I did and the staff were so lovely and accommodating! As we were alone in the room, DD didn't get too distracted so she took enough milk that it lasted her until we got home, so I could enjoy the rest of the afternoon without panicking that she was going to get hungry.

Hope you're all tucked up in bed snoozing away! Zzzzzzzz

Oh and I didn't respond to her comment btw. I nearly did. I sat there and typed out about 6 different replies, justifying myself, until I realised I don't NEED to justify myself to anyone. Let alone someone who never speaks to me anymore! I felt the best thing was to let my silence do the talking and reply to other comments on the photo, and then after some more thought (and ranting to dh) I decided to delete the comment, and then her. I needed a fb cull anyway as I have too many people on there!

That sounds like a fab day penguin. Well done for asking. I've been pleasantly surprised at how many places have quiet rooms.
Bf'ing in public has been one of my difficulties. Not so much that I care about who see's me, but because Ds is a nosey bugger and won't settle on the boob if there is other stuff to look at. Cue lots of faffing, pulling off and my enormous norks getting a good old airing.
That's why I've been so pleased at his weaning progress. He will happily open his gob for something whilst still looking around. Fingers crossed this chest thing won't set him back too much.

Wow crafty that's unbelievable! ! Glad you didn't respond and just deleted. There is nothing wrong with dummies. I don't known why there can be such a stigma around them sometimes. Some babies need them some babies won't take them. It's down to the baby. I'd rather my dd was happy and content than crying because I won't let her have a dummy. I know I've heard people say that the baby is crying for a reason so u should respond to that reason not give them a dummy but sometimes they just want comfort and suckling is comfort to them. I do think u seem to have a lot of people who criticise you rather than supporting you from reading comments on your post so I can understand why u struggle sometimes but I hope u can ignore the things people say and just carry on doing what you're doing. You're a fab mum and E is a delightful baby.

crafty what a knob to comment like that, and well done for deleting. These things shouldn't bother us but they do, especially when they touch on things we're already a bit anxious about, like motherhood in general!! Often, I think, it's more about someone trying to justify their own choices, because they are also actually anxious but can't admit it. Your baby is fine and happy with a dummy and that's all that matters.

Fatty I cannot believe someone suggested you could only comfort your baby with boob .

I'm so tired I just put my cup of tea in the fridge instead of the milk. Up three times to feed and one for dummy, which isn't bad for him, but he decided to not go back to sleep between 330 and 5 and just lie there shouting, trussing dummy or feed. Couldn't feel a temperature, teeth are through now and he's fine this morning so no idea what got into him.

It's a rainy Saturday here and we don't have plans yet. Might go shoe shopping for DH just to get out of the house. What do you all have planned?

That was supposed to be shocked face at the stupidity of the commenter, fatty, not hmm face at the believability of the comment by the way. Just re read and realised it could have come across wrong!

Evening, you lovely lot. I know it's been a while - DD just doesn't sleep and I'm fighting exhaustion constantly, so I don't get around to posting much. But I'm still a card-carrying member of Mugabe Nights. Always found drinking quietly in the corner somewhere :)

Have hired a sleep consultant. Hoping it helps. It's such a comfort to know we are all going through the same struggles!

And coconut, it's so lot cool of that wagon to tell you she doesn't approve! She and her disapproval can go eff right the hell off. "Whatever works" is my mom mantra :)

Round of drinks on me tonight ladies xx

Ahhh grok! Good to see you not so good to hear you're shattered. I totally get that feeling! Shame we can't book annual leave from motherhood sometimes isn't it?!

No lies in for me this weekend as DH is feeling tired so he's had both of them. Such is life eh ladies?!

Coffee beckons!!!!

DH is having a lie in too. Think he's tired from getting up at 4am to put the dummy back in and shushing for approx 30 seconds before giving up. Still am watching Eastenders on catch up and eating last nights pizza. So not all bad.

grok welcome back. Sorry to hear sleep is not good. These babies!!

My sleep deprived brain can't remember anything else. But happy sunday all!

Hi grok, sorry to hear sleep is so shit for you. It's so draining. I hope the sleep consultant is able to help you get a plan together and things improve. I'd be really interested to hear how you get on with it if you feel up to posting about it. And we can cheer you on with it. It's on our cards as something to consider if things don't start improving soon. Rra was about to start sleep training too I think.

Made DH get up to take ds this morning. It's not my fault he chose to watch TV til 1 am though no doubt I'll be hearing all about his sleep deprivation and heroic martyrdom later 😒. Ds actually had not a bad night (for him -4 wake ups but was fobbed off with a dummy once) but my insomnia struck again from nowhere 😞.

Sorry sleeps been so rubbish Grok. Totally get you on the annual leave front - DHs first holiday after paternity was such a disappointment as there's only so much they can do without boobs. Did make him a couple of night nappies though!

Insomnia is a bitch! I seem to be able to get to sleep twice a night so am screwed if the 2nd one is at 3am! So frustrating knowing you need sleep but it won't come!

On positive side she definitely ate some carrot last night. On the negative side she was obviously at a bad angle so most of it came out the side door onto my lap!

I'm still here too mugabeans!!

As I've mentioned on FB dS has been a totally Velcro baby with his teeth this week since they broke through last Saturday (2 at once!) so I've not been able to wee without him screaming let alone post! So not like him he's usually so laid back and smiley so has really frazzled me out! He's much improved today despite a 2 hour screaming session at 2am this morning but I'll take that if it means I get daytime smiles and a happy boy back!

My SIL had her baby on Tuesday so amazing! I literally cannot believe dS was ever so small when in fact he was over a pound smaller! Craziness! She's giving BF a real go which makes me so proud of her as she literally said to me a few weeks ago 'will you go through how to make up bottles with me as let's face it I'm not going to BF am I- your far more earth mother than me and you only did 6 weeks' bless her she's giving it a good go despite having a very fast let down now her milks in like I did and drowning in it all the time!

Crafty that woman is uber uber rude!! I would have had to say something along the lines of 'well I don't approve of your face but I don't complain' but I'm childish like that when it comes to people being rude! well done for rising above!

Loves- those acts of kindness really do restore your faith in people don't they, maybe our babies haven't been brought into such an awful world after all!

Forgotten everything else and must run the oven is beeping for ds's sweet potato wedges yum yum!

Finally joined the FB crew. Nice to see everyone.

Had a massive fight with Dh this weekend. We never fight so I'm feeling a bit blue. Poop. He's said sorry and accepted responsibility for being a dick but I feel guilty for making him feel bad. Being very tired makes you lose all sense of perspective, I think.

Adventures in weaning continue. She's not yet 6 months but I've just been lobbing bits off my plate at her. Most of it hits the deck. Joskardog is going to get fat! Her best thing so far has been chicken. Dd1 was the same. We don't eat much meat so I'll have to up my game.

Well done for being the bigger person, crafty. You are so right to get rid of the negative people. Not worth the head space.

Had two acts of kindness today. A woman offered to pack my shopping at the supermarket and a man offered to take my trolley to the car. I was fine because I had the sling so dd2 was grand but wasn't that lovely of them to offer?

effin I knew what you meant. Some people are just nutsy.
grok hope the sleepy peeps help and you get some sleep.

I'm finally doing bedtime with the little 2. DD napped today, and Nathan napped late, so bedtime fucked up a bit. Luckily I don't have to worry about DS1 going to bed get as he's not back at school until Tuesday.

Happy Sunday mugabeans 🙂
I'm soooo tired today. Ds had a night of waking every 1-2 hours. And I think the accumulative affect of his being ill and clingy all week has caught up with me. He is much better today, and there has been a pub dinner and cake, so I can't complain really!
I'm already in bed and intend to shut my eyes very soon.

Welcome back grok. Nice to see your name again.
Sorry sleep is proving difficult. I hope the consultant works.

Glad Ds is improving lily.

Yes to not having much perspective when sleep deprived jockstar. And double yes to fat dog and weaning 🙂

I hope you've all had a good Sunday. We need one of those sleep spells someone cast successfully a few weeks ago. 💫💤💤

Happy Sunday night everyone. Sorry to those having a shitty time with relationships, sleep and illnesses :(. Think everything is a bit hard going atm. I feel really ill again, to be honest it's run of the mill cold and sore throat etc but I just can't shift it and I'm so so tired. Her latest leap has finished and I genuinely tho