Mugabe Nights: sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your (sleep deprived) pain!

[mzzzf]

New thread ladies!
Buenos are still free, the bar tab is still open and you can leave your healthy living resolutions at the door!

Whoohoo DH came home with Krispy Kreme Love Bugs and Honey Bees❤️❤️❤️. I'm all set for Valentines with my Valentine nails💅🏿!!

lily/slow I did eveything with DD1 - went to lots of classes and got lots of one-to-one attention - poor babyloves number 6 - gets hardly anytime from me and I can't be bothered with all the baby classes as I've done so many of them!! She is still a happy wee soul though👶🏻

fatty my DD1 had no sweets, crisps etc until she went to school and discovered them - the more DCs I have the earlier they start getting 'rubbish', usually fed to them by another DC!! DD1 didn't have Haribo until she was about 10 years old - she always moans when she sees toddler eating her way through a bag and says it's not fair!!

dozy good news on breast feeding - all your hard work and perseverance has paid off

kbro I had 2 VBACs than 1 emergency section followed by 3 elective sections. I choose elective sections over VBAC as I personally found a section a better experience but that is easier for me to say as I have experienced both types of birth. I can understand why women would want to experience a VBAC.

Forgot to attach my pics!!

Omnomnom to the donuts! And your nails look fab loves!
Omg tmi but the hand foot and mouth sores have made it to my foo foo ouch ouch!!

loves live the nails and those donuts look amazing!
magrat ouch!

loves amazing nails and nom to donuts!

coconut I've just tried giving J a toy or a muslin to hold while he's feeding, which seemed to help.

kbro I think I'd like to have a VBAC if we do this again (had a recent realisation that I think I would like another baby, just not sure when!). My emcs was virtually the opposite of what I wanted in terms of giving birth - it still doesn't feel like I gave birth at times and it felt massively out of my control. Plus it doesn't help I've had several comments about me having the easy option and being too posh to push

magrat owie owie! That sounds horrible, hope it clears up soon.

Dozy well done on persevering with breastfeeding and horray to no nipple shields!

Coconut glad you had a night out and Pajama day sounds great. DS is also selective about who he goes to (and who he smiles at!) He's generally OK as long as me or DH are around but if we go out somewhere sometimes we come back to crying!! I guess as he gets older he will be more independent, seems early for separation anxiety.

Loves those Krispy Kreme look amazing, well done to your DH!! Sadly no Krispy Kreme nearby to me but I often get them if I go into London (not that I have since DS was born though!) I'm sure being baby number 6 means she gets lots of entertaining from watching the other children!

Magrat ouch!! Hope it heals soon.

Pizza night for us tonight 😀

DH had DS for 5 hours and when I came home he had to go for a nap because it was such hard work! FFS. And I let DH have a lie in til 9.30 this morning too!

Ola!
We've got a bit of a grumpy boy today. He coughed a lot in the night, his teeth seem to be bothering him and I think he may be constipated. Joy!

Ds is getting on really well with purées. We are very near the 6 month mark now, so I want to start finger foods.
What kind of things are going down well with the other augbabes? I'm a bit nervous about it, so keen to try before we get a bit stuck.

jockstar, I think the shoot will be fab. If the photographer is good and manages to catch those very special bf'ing moments, they will be something to treasure forever. My motto is that it's better to regret doing something than to regret not doing it.

Those are amazing photos lily.
We don't do valentines either.

I'm never giving the sleepyhead up slow! It's been a big lifesaver for us. We're already planning on getting the next size up. The cot is purely to give us all a bit more room, and to introduce the idea of his own space. I miss cuddles with mt frolic! He'll stay in it until we're no longer bf'ing during the night I think.
I'm going to get a mobile that can go with him into his own room for some continuity.

Don't be scared of telling people you cuddle, feed and sleep with your baby coconut. Anyone who judges you (or any mothers choice) is a knobber.

kbro, I had an emcs and have been thinking what I'd do if we are lucky enough to have another when the time is right. At the moment I'm definitely sure I'd opt for the Elcs. My recovery was fine and the whole experience was really positive from the point the dr decided to go for the section. I have no burning desire to experience a vaginal delivery.

Beautiful nails and donuts loves.

Ouchy ouchy ouchy magrat. Can you bathe in something soothing? Oats maybe?

Right, the boob monster is calling. Sorry if I've missed anything - busy thread today. Happy Saturday night augmums 🙂

DS fave finger foods so far are pitta bread and either Philadelphia or melted cheddar, banana, toast, pancakes and crumpets. He is however a lazy sod at heart and finds them a bit frustrating so does prefer being spoon fed. I find best to offer finger foods first as during ir afterwards they get ignored. Hoping to get a bit more adventurous next week and start properly cooking for DS.

Tindel I know what you mean about the emergency c section. I found it all quite horrible and scary and the epidural made me puke and retch loads. Plus they accidentally cut a nip in my bladder so had to have the catheter on for ages afterwards. Can't believe after what you went through people tell it was the easy option

Magrat you poor thing. Hope that passes very very fast!!!

On the more positive side, that is the longest I've left DS for, and everybody survived. He did only drink 120ml in that time, which doesn't seem much, but I've no idea how much he normally takes... And I feel much better coming home to be mum again for having a few hours doing non baby focused things. Lots of fun despite it being slightly odd dancing about sober in the early afternoon, it's as close to a big night out as I'm likely to get any time soon.

Not much is going down at all at the moment food wise... He did seem to enjoy a lick of my hot cross bun earlier!

The extra room taken by the sleepyhead means that ds has really outgrown his crib now, but I don't want to give it up yet either. We're going to try and assemble the cot next to the bed with one side off, at least until we're reliably only waking up once or twice a night.

I also have claw marks on my face from where ds grabs my mouth. He's also taken to pinging my bra strap while feeding. Such a boy!

I sometimes think ds gets too much attention and might be good for him to just chill out without constant interaction. Just shows we'll always be questioning what we're doing one way or another and the babbers will generally be fine regardless.

Proud moment dozy! You go mama!

Yep, it's the 'advice' from some friends I can't take - with the implication that if you don't take it then any problems are your own fault. Frankly as soon as the phrase 'rod for your own back' starts to come out I'm mentally telling them where to dive said rod!

joskar I'd love a good bf'ing photo of me and DS. I put a bunch of pics up on fb for his half -birthday and was then thinking what will I have to remember those special clawing, flailing, blistered nipples times.

Let us know how the sleep training goes Rra. I don't really want to do it, but I want to know that I might if things don't improve eventually.

Right, sorry for what I've missed. DH has now woken up and decided he's not actually too knackered to go to the pub with his mates, so off to have a quick tea together before that. Means I can have an early night though, I usually stay up a bit later if DH is around.

I've been wondering what I'd do if I had another too.

DS was a crash section because his pulse plummeted, I'd been in labour 53 hours without progress, and I had an infection from my waters going earlier in the week. My epidural failed during the section so I screamed my way through it and I had a severe reaction to the tape that held the epidural so my back and arse blistered and peeled. No one has dared to make any comments about the easy option. despite all that though, I actually felt well informed and relatively in control, and I kind of feel like I'd rather just have a section again. It's like, well, I already have all the crappy section issues (a numb bit, a crooked belly, apparently permanent itching), do I really want to risk all the vaginal damage as well?

siani I'd forgotten about yours - that was horrendous! I had about 24 hours notice I was going to have my emcs (preeclampsia picked up at a clinic appointment), but spent it hooked up to a drip to make sure I didn't fit and having my blood pressure checked every 15 minutes throughout the night. The op wasn't too bad, although they thought I had a blood clot in my lungs and I was on oxygen for a while. Think I've recovered well, but would rather not do it that way again if we do this again.

I think we have had 2 self-settles and a successful cot transfer tonight - get in!

tindel people are ill-informed wankers sometimes! There is no way a section (especially an emcs) is an 'easy' option! I had a section with grumpy 1 and then a successful VBAC with grumpy 2 and the latter (for me, I hasten to add!) was by far and away the 'easier' option. And yet the difference in what people felt it acceptable to say to me afterwards was massive - grrr!!

I was lucky enough not to need a section with any of mine, and I'm glad (it came close with DS1 as he was in distress. Managed to get him out before they decided to whisk me off to theatre and that was only thanks to my mum begging them to give me another hour) My cousins partner had c/sections with every one of hers (emcs followed by 3 elcs) and the recovery was awful. She found it difficult to pick her babies up, she was in agony for weeks with it, infections and that's just the bits she told us. So seeing that I know its definitely not the easy option!

saini the thought of your epidural failing during your c section makes me feel queasy. Fuck!!

slow that's great to hear a successful vbac story. At the hospital when DS was 3 days old the Dr make a big thing of saying to me you can do vbac next time. At the time it was way to much for me to think about but now there is a bit of distance from birth I'd consider it. But also be a little more realistic about the whole thing in general and despite what nct / hypnobirthing book said probably won't ever just gently breathe a baby out.

DH and I had date night last night. Was v nice to have some couple time and lovely food. And so nice to leave the house without the pram and 103 items. And DS was fine for my friend too. Slept bit better last night. Think swimming tires him out. Wrong to start taking him swimming every day??

fatty I love that you have birth naturally as nathan was such a big baby. DS was too and a few people have said I won't be able to do it naturally cause we make big babies (we made one big baby and he was 2 weeks late) It's amazing how many friends know more about your birth than the Dr who was there!!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Thanks for the encouragement about the photos. I'm hoping to see about getting my hair done this week so I won't look too dreadful.

I had a vbac this time. The emcs with dd1 was awful and I was very slow to recover. The vbac was the best, most empowering, wonderful experience of my life. I read the Ina May Gaskin book and did a bit of hypnobirthing and really focussed on positive stories. You have to do what makes you comfortable and confident. I know people who have had wonderful, positive births and people who have had stressful and frightening births. Whether they are csec or vaginal doesn't make any odds. Every birth is different. Whatever you decide I really recommend the Ina May book. I felt I understood the birth process much more and I felt confident going into labour. You can request a meeting with the head mw at your hospital if you need to go through your notes and discuss what happened.

Finally got the high chair out and I've given dd2 a couple of things to gnaw on. She's had a crust of bread, a wee bit of pasta, a wee bit of pear, a strawberry so it's going well. Doubt I'll bother with purée this time. Last time it was exciting to see her taste loads of different things and I loved "making" her food but this time I cba. Poor second born. With any luck she'll be a better eater though. Dd1 is and always has been a total nightmare with food.

Plenty snow here this morning so we're off out sledging then the ILs are coming for lunch at two. Roast beef and yorkies etc then rhubarb crumble. Diet, what diet...?

kbro I was told by people that I would need a c section as there would be no way I would get such a big baby out.
He was my quickest easiest birth. (He was the only one who wasn't back to back and face first) I pushed twice and he was out. (Gravity!)

Morning everyone :)

I will def try and post more often, but I'm just worried I'm going to forget to reply to people as I've forgotten who's said what already 🙈

Also I've read back a bit to refresh my memory on who's who and if I've got names right, you know me dozygirl from here...DD born the day after yours...? waves Although if I'm wrong now I'll look like an idiot

I had am emcs. I was in labour for 42 hours, and for about 8 of those hours they said I was ready to push. The issue was DD was stuck and her head was turned to the side (I had been saying for weeks she was stuck but no one listened to me!). They considered forceps but as she was quite far up they were umming and ahing about it and then her heart rate kept dropping. They thought the clip wasn't on right so fiddled about a bit but then then realised it was on right so a c section under a GA was needed.

I found this really difficult because when c section options had been discussed with me the day before I was told it would be under a GA so very risky for me and the baby so when they said we were going I was very scared. They pressed the big red button and although there were already 15 people in the room, more came rushing in and we went to theatre and watching them set up and then be put under waa terrifying. I was diagnosed with ptsd 8 weeks later.

We've been talking about another baby and I honestly don't know whether to try for a vbac or have an elcs. I would still need the c section under a general so that puts me off. However, I suppose I would feel more in control this time and it wouldn't be so scary (I hope!). I would HATE to try for a vbac and it end in an emergency again :(

Anyway, another baby for us won't be for a while as we need to move first and I'm still not recovered from the last c section. Lol.

DD is poorly atm :( she has a chesty sounding cough. It doesn't seem like a cold as no other symptoms and she doesn't have a temperature at the moment. It's just really affecting her sleep. In my pp I mentioned her getting 4 hours sleep in a row - that was a 2 night fluke last week! We are back to waking every 3 hours again. It's soooooo hard and people bragging about getting "too much" sleep really doesn't help

I think people lie a lot though. Dh's best friend phoned last week and their dd is 8 weeks younger than hours and has always "slept through the night". After a bit of prodding, friend admitted she sometimes wakes for a feed around 5, and every night dh's friend is woken up to put the dummy back in, or hold hands with his dd. So why boast that she sleeps through the night then?!

kbro ha ha! That's totally what I did, got realistic. First time around I did NCT and read all the books etc, was aiming for a whale music accompanied water birth.

This time when I decided to go for the VBAC I did my own research based on things I knew would make me feel empowered (for example I read up on my hospital c-section rates so I knew going in that my chance of ending up in theatre as a VBAC was no higher than that of any other first time labouring Mother on that day). Like joskar I made sure I properly understood the biology behind the birthing process so I wasn't panicking about what was going on. I was realistic about the fact that I wouldn't be able to use the pool and that I'd need to be on a foetal monitor and I made my peace with that.

The result was a great intervention and pain-relief free birth with a much quicker recovery afterwards. I regard myself as very lucky, and if you are considering it I would strongly recommend giving it a go.

Good morning mugabeans.
A shit start to the day here - Ds is poorly and we've had a trip to out of hours for antibiotics for his chest.

It's so interesting hearing all your birth stories. I had an emcs, but it wasn't a red button job. I was induced due to waters breaking but no contractions. After 24 hours on the drip, ds had barely moved down and so they decided to operate. I felt quite disempowered the whole time I was on the drip. The monitoring was horrible. I hated being stuck to the bed. I felt that the decision to have the section gave me the control back.

I was visited less than 24 hours after the birth by a doctor who came to tell me the section had been very straightforward. This was apparently very good news because she knew that women of my age like to try for their second baby straight away. (I was 35) Oh, and I could have a vaginal birth too. I think my reply went something along the lines of asking her if she was serious! With a less than day old baby, I had other things on my mind at that point.

I totally second jockstar's recommendation for the Ina May book. I did feel quite prepared for the birthing experience after reading it, and despite it all going tits up, the skills really did help.

I hope you're all having a lovely Sunday. The weather is glorious here. I'm thinking a walk and some fresh sea air will do us all some good.

Big valentines love to all at the bar last night. It was posh chocolate for breakfast here, and not only because of a shit night, thanks to DH. He really likes v-day and although I've never been that bothered, I'm not about to turn down an occasion for being spoiled

Teething is currently to blame for grumpiness I think. DS woke at 12.30 and clamped his mouth shut when I tried to give him the dummy, so I think that was because his mouth is sore. Had to prise his jaw open to get some calpol in. One tooth is most of the way through the gum and the next one is part way through. Must be so strange for them to grow teeth!

We're still v undecided about a 2nd child,but nothing to do with the birth. I'd love a sibling for DS but also don't want anything getting in the way of my current close relationship with him. Birth wise I was induced, ventouse, forceps, c-section was on the cards due to distress, and a long way from the water hypno birth I'd imagined. But actually I felt fine about it, especially once I'd had the epidural!

I shied away from the ina may book because I'd felt the hypno book actually was full of a lot of bs (I.e. Women in Africa just squat down in a field and sneeze their babies out - actually complications and deaths in labour are much higher where there aren't decent medical facilities) and almost made me feel worse by refusing to think about interventions and that I was relaxing 'wrongly' if I felt pain. But if it's a bit more realistic I'd like to read it. If there's a next time I might give a water birth a go, but will definitely not hesitate to ask for an epidural if necessary.

Hope your dc's get better d soon crafty and frolic.

We're off for a romantic trip to the dump but planning to stop at the shops to get supplies for a roast in later. Rhubarb crumble, now you're talking joskar

Happy valentines ladies! Hope everyone has got chocolate, whether for valentines or not. DP handed me a toblerone this morning so he's in the good books.

I think birth stories are my guilty pleasure I'm fascinated by them. I was induced, the drip made DS's heart rate fall so they prepped me for CS but at the last minute changed their minds, wheeled me back and told me to labour on. I'd lost my shit mentally by then and then my epidural failed and from then I was just a mess. After DS came I promised I would never do that again and if I had another baby would insist on elcs. Now I just don't know... I hear so often that second births are easier but I'm not sure I could put myself through it again.

And yes, yes to people irl fibbing about their babies. Wtf is that about?

God I still find it too emotive to talk about my 'birth' of mini mzzzf - and I use that term incredibly loosely as I feel like I didn't give birth at all, she 'arrived' by csection (emcs) is what I tell people. Arrrrggg cannot really type it out here without getting emotional, not because of the process of an emcs itself but the utter basic feelings of failure at not being able to give birth (or BF - different story!!). Feeling like a total loser is not the best start to motherhood! Gaaaaah pass the vodka!!

Anyway enough of this pish - DH is riding ALL the brownies points for letting me sleep the last two, count 'em, one, two, nights and getting me roses. He can stay 😁

Happy Valentine's Day all! Not doing much for it here but have bought sticky toffee pudding for dessert tonight yum 😀

Reading all your birth stories make me feel very lucky that mine went to plan (so painful, but a normal delivery). Mzzzf I really believe it is total luck on what kind of birth you have-you haven't failed at all! It also doesn't mean you won't have a completely different experience next time. Same with breastfeeding, my friend said someone she knows with twins had a lot of trouble feeding one twin but the other latched on just fine-which shows it really is often down to the baby and not anything the mum is or isn't doing