December 2012: The one were they are stubborn Monkeys

[halestone]

New thread for us.

Nutella, i'm not much help i'm afraid as H's bedtime is 8:45pm most nights and she still gets up 2-3 times and is up for the day around 8-8:30am. I was kind of hoping she would just stop waking up magically but know deep down that its going to have to be a tough love thing like WL did, but i just can't bring myself to do it yet.

Oh and i forgot to give you some and say it must be so much harder with two

Can you start bedtime really early like 5 o'clock? R was 5:30 for yonks because he was such a nightmare, he's still more like 6:30! The downside is the 6:30 in the morning starts...

Eurgh just had to make our garden wind safe, from this incoming storm. H's playhouse was already upside down at the other side of the garden.

I think pidj has a good idea Nutella. Ds is about to go to bed now.

Hales its sooo windy here already.

We've not been long home from paultons park ds loved all the rollercoasters!

Glad you had a nice day Spotty, the weather is horrendous here.

H tickles me, i've just been getting her ready for bed and she closed one eye and said 'ooo mum i only have one eye, the other one has gone' so i started giggling and then she opened her eye and shouted 'surprise me have two eyes again mum, i can see'.

hales I love those funny little things they do.
I'm back to work tomorrow after a week and a half off - it's making me have a bit of a career anxiety attack. It's all stupid as I'm perfectly happy with where I am for now but am obsessed with getting prepared to move on.

On the plus side a bit of anxiety has resulted in a remarkably clean and tidy house!

Delad yours does sound like a good idea. At the moment 6:30 would be a lie in I would happily take!
Thank you everyone. I appreciate the support. I think what makes it worse is we haven't had a chance to kind of gather ourselves together to form a plan to deal with DS. we are just fire fighting at the moment.

hales H is funny. How is work going at the moment? Has your boss cooled off?

WL a clean house is always nice even when it is not for long

R currently eats dinner at 5:15, bath around 6 then pyjamas-story-bed. It means we don't eat as a family, but I do sit at the table with him so I figure proper meals can come later. He sleeps 11-12 hours and definitely needs it, he's a total nightmare when he's over tired - tantrums, aggression, defiance, running off into the road, whinging, clingy etc. When he's had enough sleep he's kind, funny, sociable, has a decent attention span, and is happy to play independently both at home and out. In other words, a totally different person! He's the stereotypical vile 2yo when tired

delad has he dropped his daytime nap? Our problem is making it fit both of them. I think we can get away with keeping DD up a little bit after DS is in bed. Honestly, if we could just skip the bedtime theatre and bed hopping we'll figure out what to do for DD.

WL can you tell me how you got them to stay in their beds? I appreciate its a few bad nights and a battle but would you mind giving me a few more details? Either here or PM. Thank you.

DS does not understand sticker charts at all. "You get a sticker for doing x. When you have stickers in all of these places then you get a prize".
"Ok Mummy" which also sounds like it means "Mummy were you just talking at me?" I really don't know how to explain it to him so that he understands and he takes absolutely no notice of it after that.

No, he has an hour and a half in the middle of the day!

What time does dd nod off?

Oh, and we do chocolate button at lunch and tea for good behaviour. Stickers are a bit long term for r he needs instant gratification

I'm with Delad about instant satisfaction. We do if your good for an hour/afternoon/at a meal/bedtime you can have a treat. Bouncy Castle put up or painting or making things. The longer she is good for the better the reward.

Biscuits often feature between times too! And phoning grandma if we do x quickly and have time left

A week off also means a horrible first day back. Still on the train heading for home
nutella happy to share and I so remember feeling exactly as you've described in not being able to get a plan together! Keeping them in their beds went a little something like this. Wake up and call for me, I go in, demand to come in our bed (previously had let them as it was easier). Few nights of sitting with them on my lap in their room while they cry and point at the door. Once they accepted not leaving their room, few nights of standing by the cot stroking while they cried to be picked up. Once they accepted that, few nights of quick stroke and leave them to it. I just kept telling myself that they were crying because they weren't getting what they wanted (same as crying for a biscuit or to play with something dangerous) and they were safe and comforted - which was more than could be said if I'd let it go on any longer! As the Rolling Stones would say, you don't always get what you want, you get what you need!

I have to admit I am currently working get T to stay in bed - even when she's really tired like now - she keeps going to her bedroom door and calling me.

I am going with ignoring as a technique!

Hales and delad you're right! I thought I would try a sticker chart but he is too little. He can't even manage to behave at dinner for a bowl of strawberries- he loves strawberries and will eat them from the punnet in the supermarket given a chance.

DD normally goes to bed at about the same time ish as DS around 7pm. Tonight they both ended up in bed earlier. DH fought DS into bed using the technique I've been trying out on him the last few nights.
he climbs out of bed and runs for the door and thinks it is hilarious. So instead of putting him back in his bed I take away his dummies and tell him they are only for bed. Then I sit on the chair in his room and hold him until he calms down and tells me that he wants to go back to bed.

So it sounds similar to what you described WL. Except that I keep waking up to him standing by the bed (holding his most loved penguin one night, which was so cute) or climbing in next to me.
And thank you for the analogy with crying for a biscuit or something dangerous like scissors or batteries or the lawn mower or the oven ororororor I am sure that will help.

I ca only get DS to stay in bed if he's so exhausted he falls asleep drinking his milk.

If he's awake once the milk is gone it's game over!

For those of you saying it's windy - I'm in a bloody caravan in Northumberland! It's been horrendously windy and so so cold!

Frazzled snap, H is the same. Very rarely she will be that tired she falls asleep of her own accord.

Nutella, you will get through this soon its just crap at the moment as Ds is obviously going through a stage were his sleep needs have changed and no-one is sure what they have changed to.

I have just joined another thread were they set goals they want done for the whole of June. I have decided to set myself daily goals and write them on there. Todays goals were de-junk my kitchen (which i have just finished) and take H out for a walk which i'll do later with Dp. Hopefully i'll get myself more organised doing this.

Also Frazzled the weather is suppose to get better from today, i hope your holiday improves.

2 year old girl for sale i can just about deal with the tantrums/lack of sleep. However i have just had Take That on and she demanded Peppa Pig instead! What have i raised?

frazzled we spent the November half term before T was born in a caravan in the Isle of Wight. It was super cold and I was miserable as I couldn't walk round the bed without my belly or arse rubbing on the wall!

Just had to apologise to everyone for completely overacting about not much, losing my rag and having a big shout not my finest hour. Everyone seems to have got it over it now and are all tucked up in bed.