Hi Hotmama. That's brilliant you are still bfing Evie.
Those are quite big topics, so this will probably be looooong.
Alfie cosleeps with us so has been free to run about at bedtime since about 14 months, when we took his cot down. I don't know if all babies get out of bed when they are put in, but I bet a fair few of them do. I put a bed guard up to begin with, because Alfie did roll out of bed a few times. I took it off after a couple of months because he was using it as a climbing frame, and he hasn't fallen out of bed since. Must just have got used to it all.
Funnily enough he did stay in bed to begin with, it was as if he didn't realise he could get out. Then he discovered that he could . So now I always take him to bed and lie there until he goes to sleep because I can't bothered standing around outside or sitting on the floor. He can take anything from ten minutes to one hour to go to sleep, but if he consistently takes a long time, I just move his bedtime or drop his nap, guaranteed sleep (unless he gets toooo tired) then I have to keep lying him down and telling him to sleep. Quite often I fall asleep for a bit as well, which makes up for him waking at 6:30.
Dp stands in the room and tells him to get on the bed which seems to work as well.
So if Grace wants to get up you could do a variety of things really, I think just do what suits.
Hopefully she will get in bed and fall sound asleep, like an angel, for about thirteen hours - With a two hour nap during the day.
Re pottying. I started ECing with Alfie, so I had to watch him to see if he needed to go, which is the part I found almost impossible. Also part of this approach is using body rythym, like potty on waking, just like we all go to the loo when we wake up - same with children. Also potty after naps and after eating or half an hour after a big drink, for obvious reasons.
ECing also uses a cue sound, like a saying 'poooop' or whatever, but I think this is for younger babies, to get them started. It does work though, it's what they do in China and India. They whistle or something and the baby peeeeees.
It's good to show poops in nappies going down the loo if you can and bring them in with you so they know about poops and peeps and the toilet flushing etc...
Alfie is nappy free at home, and is 100% reliable with poops on potty, but he needs to be reminded about peeps, and we do have some accidents, but not enough to warrant a return to nappies. He is in a nappy at nighttime and going out, and I will leave him in them until I know I can trust him to let me know in advance that he needs to go, and he is happy peeing on a loo.
I don't think you have to do this all or nothing thing that a lot of people go for, starting part-time seems to have worked for us. Just potty at certain times. Oh and to begin with I used to sit with Alfie while he sat on the potty, otherwise he would just get up and wander off.
I'm glad I have done what I did, because he is a fairly basic talker and I would have waited a long time for him to tell me he wanted to use the loo, but he clearly is ready at least most of the time.
To be fair he did start telling me he had pooped after the fact, when he was twenty months, but that's a bit late to put him on the potty, although I still did put him on just to make the point. He does say peep when he has already done a bit or a lot on the floor and he runs to the potty, but he does try. And he can tell me poop before now, which is real progress for him.
I was told my another mum that they start off telling you after, then during, then before. I don't know if that is true, but I think Alfie has got that a bit.
He is very bad for getting in bed then claiming he needs to poop or peep, just to get up again.
Phew bit of a monologue there.
So that's what we are doing.