October 2014 (including some september early arrivals) the wonderful and crazy newborn days

[fedupofrainydays]

Thread to share the newborn news and support each other through the 'eeek what do I do?' When the baby gets home and you stare at it in the car seat and think - help!!

I am feeling so happy not to be pregnant anymore, sitting drinking a strong coffee without feeling guilty, eating crap without feeling guilty & having horrendous heartburn, so happy i am getting comfy in bed again as i have no sciatic pain or pgp !! Had 2 large glasses of wine last night.... Bloody heaven !! And im really enjoying being a mummy the second time around, i am so much more relaxed and not so frantic about everything, think its having a great effect on baby as she is the most content wee thing ever, if she was my first i would have had four by now!! DP is really enjoying it this time aswell, but keeping in mind i might feel diffrent when dp goes back to work i really dont know how i am going to get out of the house for 8.30am with two kids??? Probably 5 am start for me? im trying to be positive to keep stress levels down and thinking that each day that passes is a day that i'll never back with my children, so im trying to enjoy just living in the momment for a change and not stressing so much about the mess of my house etc which i done last time.. not good as "cleaning the house when children are growing, is like shovling snow when its still snowing"

I just posted this on the antenatal thread by accident. Feel like a bitch going on about how im so happy not to be pregnant blah blah.., they are so bloody fed up, i am totally mortified

Haha it'll give them hope! Everyone will be over here in a matter of days anyway.

I love that saying about shovelling snow.

Hi all, I was mostly a lurker on the antenatal thread, had ds2 1 day early so he's technically a September baby as he was born on the 30th! But decided to stick with October :-)

Ds2 was born by section. I'm over 2 weeks on now so not feeling too bad. However, I have yet to spend more than a few hours just me and both ds's, and I'm working myself up in to an absolute panic over how I will manage it. I already feel like I'm failing ds1 big time as I seem to have so little time and patience for him at the moment, forever yelling at him to be careful with his brother, to jut do what I say, to just hurry up etc etc. I'm either feeding or comatose on the sofa (ds2 not sleeping so great!) when it is just the 3 of us I seem to be totally reliant on tv/iPad. Ds1 is really miserable at the moment, he's normally very placid, funny, loving, but he's flying off the handle at the slightest little thing at the moment and it's so hard to see.

How are those of you with more than one handling your older children along side the needs of the baby? And how are you managing alone???

Tory DH does back to work Monday so my test begins then looking after 2 dc on my own!
Ds1 has been very good but he's not sleeping as well, and he definitely knows things are different. He can be really gentle one minute kissing ds2 or stroking his hair, then he gets over excited and starts hitting him. So I'm not sure how I'm going to leave them both in same room together when I'm on my own and need to pop out the room. I'm trying really hard not to just hold ds2 all the time as much as I want to!

tory im finding if i can grab a wee ten minutes to do something with dd1 like read a book or play make beleive whilst feeding dd2 keeps my guilt levels at a minimum? Even just watching him play on ipad, and praising him when he does something well, try and pick your battles but dont feel bad about checking behaviour that is unacceptable, it will pay off in the long run! Lets see if i take my own advice when dp goes back to work remember you are doing a great job ( hardest job in the world) and dont be too hard on yourself

Tory I did last week on my own with our DS (nearly 2) and newborn DD, for the first time, I found a sling invaluable and figured out how to BF multitasking. Also I made a point of not automatically meeting DDs needs first. So when she'd pooed and I was about to change her and he'd insist on me changing his clean bum - I'd humour him. He also got to play with DDs toys and blankets whenever he wanted. We spent a lot of time reading stories or doing jigsaws whilst I BF DD. Lil spent a lot of time in her bouncy chair and buggy bassinet too - she's going to end up being a lot more patient than DS. DS also watched much more TV than I'd like but I made sure when DD was sleeping we did something fun like baking. I also made sure we went to his usual toddler groups. Next week DS' CM is back so I'll have 3 mornings a week just with DD to sleep and get stuff done, and the CM will take DS swimming, to bookbugs and soft play etc so I won't feel so bad about boring at home days with me!

Because DS hasn't been second fiddle he's not acted up because of his sisters arrival. I really didn't want him to resent her - hence I'm not automatically going to her first. I agree with Stigz though I'm not letting bad behaviour slide though.

tory I know how you feel. I'm tied to the sofa all day I literally haven't had any time to do anythig with the other two. I don't know how I will cope when OH goes back to work.

Tory don't worry too much about relying on the ipad/cartoons. The tiny baby stage is so short overall that a couple of months of heavy CBeebies isn't going to scar anyone! Though reading books is the best standby. My first had just turned two when my second was born. Her arrival made him seem so big! It was s shock to have my baby suddenly seem like such a big boy. The older two are 4.5 and 2.5 now and it seems less of a shock with dd2 (I also know that within a few months the baby is going to be shrieking with laughter at her siblings behaviour and it will all be worth it!). Just give yourself lots of time to get anytime done in terms of getting out of the house (I will be telling myself this once I'm back on the school run by myself!).

Stigz glad to hear you're enjoying it more second time around!

STIGZ I'm also enjoying it far more second time round and feeling fairly relaxed about things, despite an afternoon today where I ended up looking after both kids although there were three other adults in the house.

Tory my mw was talking about this today - she said the older child doesn't necessarily feel neglected, even though it feels like that to you. I guess it's a bit different for me with a 5 yo to those of you with much younger kids as I know dd was much less resourceful a couple of years ago, plus teaching her that, for example, she can't ask us questions when we're on the phone is in any case age-appropriate. I think as well we are all hyper-alert to our dc's moods right now and may well decide they are struggling to adjust when actually it's just a normal behavioural phase or even just a bad day.

I think my DS is happier now Lil's arrived compared to when I was knackered and heavily preggers. The first week I did really worry that I'd lost my closeness with him by having another but I think already life with his sister is the new normal for him. Tonight when I was making tea, he toddled the length of the house just to give me a cuddle . He loves kissing and cuddling Lilla and laughs like a drain when she sneezes or hiccups. I can't wait to see them really interacting in a few months.

I'm also dreading looking after both children on my own when DH goes back to work. I'm lucky as dd goes to preschool some days so that will give me some chance to rest. I've had a few times when I've been bf ds while reading dd a story and it feels manageable, but other times did will do something naughty while I'm pinned under the baby and I wonder how I'll cope with a whole day on my own!

I don't think dd feels too neglected yet. She's besotted with her brother and I've been making a fuss of what a good big sister she is, how helpful she is etc. She's been refusing to go on the potty and holding it in till she's completely desperate, which was happening before ds arrived but I'm finding it much harder to stay calm while sleep deprived!

DS had his tongue tie snipped on Thurs and feeding is going much better, no more bleeding nipples, hooray! Unfortunately I got mastitis yesterday so I've got a fever and feel like crap but I'm on antibiotics now.

We also got DD tongue tie snipped today. I felt so conflicted because I knew it was for the best but she was still distraught and fussy today. I'm also feeling the lack of sleep too

Stigz that really made me laugh - I'm sure they won't take offence!

Tory I'm also dreading it and really nervous (only done a few hours alone so far). Health visitor reminded me the fear is often worse than the reality though and I remember this was the case first time round going solo. There are bound to be very stressful moments at times but they do pass and we'll all adjust to new situation be it one child, two, three or more. Right, now time to take my own advice and stop worrying!

Good advice Captain, I'm sure we'll survive!

Madam, I felt bad too. DS was fussy after his snip and I was wondering whether he was in pain. He now has an ulcer under his tongue so I still feel a bit guilty but he's feeding loads better so I think it was worth it. I think he's caught his big sister's cold too, his throat sounds really sore and when he cries it's just a pathetic little hoarse squeak so I'm generally feeling very sorry for him at the moment!

I'm watching X factor with my gorgeous little boy curled up on my chest, feeling very lucky. Might not feel the same at 3am!

There's little better than a cluster feeding newborn snoozing on your chest whilst you chill for an evening of cuddles, TV and more cuddles.

I'm at the stage where it feels like she's always been here I just realised tonight.

Wtf - why have I STILL got heartburn??? FFS, I'm not pregnant any more!!!

Fed up relaxin (is that the name of the hormone that softens ligaments in pregnancy?) levels are still high so I guess the sphincter at the top of your tummy isn't keeping acid in very well. I've noticed my knees and ankles are over pronating easily because of how soft my ligaments are. I think that's the case whilst BF?

My heartburn only went yesterday. Was beginning to think it was my new permanent mate. I had it so badly in labour, was horrible.

My appetite hasn't come back yet though, which is frustrating. Could just eat a big brunch and be done with for the day.

My boobs are three times the size of pip's head. Feeding rugby ball style I can just see these little eyes and hands sticking out from underneath this huge fleshy mound. Is quite comical.

Goats

Oh my goodness my appetite has gone nuts! Making up for lost time with 9 months of HG?
I almost fit into my old jeans again! Thanks Dylan hehe. Little monkey slept for over 4 hours and my boobs feel like they're going explode!!

No appetite here either, still want chocolate but not curry !! I had chocolate peanuts for breakfast !

I wish it was safe to sleep with newborns on your chest .,, my wee dd keeps getting hiccups when laying down, she settles so much better on my chest, i would deffo sleep like this if it wasnt dangerous! I would love to be a kangaroo just now, with my joey upright in my pouch i dread the "transfer" !! Im so tired tonight, i get paranoid i'll go into a deep sleep & not hear her?

I'm paranoid about falling asleep with baby on chest. I keep waking up in a panic thinking the duvet is baby. Takes me a horrified few seconds to realise he is in his crib.

Currently trying to direct angry red baby towards an incredibly sore nipple.

Last night the baby badger fed from 11.20pm to 6.40am. There were two short (under 20min) breaks in this time where she wasn't feeding or screaming. Please god tonight is better!