October 2014 (including some september early arrivals) the wonderful and crazy newborn days

[fedupofrainydays]

Thread to share the newborn news and support each other through the 'eeek what do I do?' When the baby gets home and you stare at it in the car seat and think - help!!

Oh yellow, my boyfriend has said all along that epidurals are for people who just aren't prepared to work hard or suffer for something these days. Apparently people are 'soft'. After 2 days of labour I think even he agreed that my epidural was the best thing ever. Ha. I suggested he let me slash indiscriminately at his ball sack with a knife after I'd given him Chinese burns for 24 hours, but he wasn't up for it. Wuss.

I ended up with a full spinal and forceps delivery instead of the natural water birth I wanted. I fell in love with the anaesthetist who took my pain away!
B2b contractions scared me by their intensity, intervention was necessary and next time I won't be afraid to ask for pain relief

Munday - I told the anaesthiatist I loved her.

I'm thinking of contacting my nct instructor and telling her she's clearly a stronger woman than me (not that I care) if she can birth naturally with no pain relief. Maybe other people can but not me

Whilst I was in transition (although they thought I was only 1cm dilated) hanging from curtain rails (funny now, but not funny then) I actually told them to cut the monster out rather than go through the pain!!

And yes I screamed as I birthed his head. Possibly not my finest hour but next time give me more drugs other than gas and air

I couldn't do gas and air, was so disappointing. I got to pushing in water with 4 paracetamol over 10 hours. Then things went wrong, hence spinal. It was my biggest fear but I wasn't coping at that point, so was the best thing ever. The pushing bit was so calm and lovely without most of the pain. Ace.

My friend had an epidural after labouring hard for 17hours... She said it was amazing!!

I'm thinking of contacting my nct instructor and telling her she's clearly a stronger woman than me

Interesting you say that Missus - my doula also had no pain relief for her 3 children, BUT she had fast uncomplicated labours all three times (3 hours longest labour, no tears, no suggestion of instruments etc). I'm thinking that my NCT teacher had similar experiences. Slightly different if that was your experience of childbirth really.

I've done both. One with epidural and one without. The length of labour was a reason for the epidural for my first - it was after 3 days of contracting every 10 mins or less. I was too tired to face the pain any more. My second was painful, but much shorter - still two days long but only really bad at night.
Also the epidural with my first helped me push harder and longer and manage to turn the baby enough so I didn't need a c section. I didn't loose any of the pressure to push, just took the edge off the pain.
I strongly believe in taking whatever pain relief you need. Everyone is different, their bodies and babies and labours are all different. Gas and air didn't work for me first time but did the second (who knows why!)

I don't miss being pregnant either. It was so uncomfy and I didn't even do the last month!

I did 22 hours on tens and paracetamol, 4 on gas and air and then the epidural was heaven! I really didn't want one but by hour 26 I had to for the pain relief and to be able to sleep. I was actually screaming for one in the end!

fedup - exactly the same for me with the positives of the spinal. All along (from the night before I even got near the hospital - and at that point I'd already lost a night of sleep with irregular contractions that I couldn't kip through), I'd been saying that the longer it took, the more worried I was about being too tired to do the hard work at the end. In the end the spinal gave me time to regain a bit of strength, get 20 minutes kip (and boyfriend a chance to leave to get a cup of tea)... and I could feel the whole pressure/movement of the baby down and out, I just wasn't in pain. Like I say, it was ace. I probably won't have more children, so I'm glad I got to feel a baby coming out of me, but I'm not sorry I had the spinal.

Labour can also be very different for different pregnancies too - OK my first was b2b and blimmin intense but I was incredibly surprised to find this time I was 4cm dilated and contracting every 5 minutes and hadn't noticed. I thought I must have been a real wuss to find my first labour so painful but actually I wasn't if labour two was anything to go by. I do think there is a danger that lots of birthing guidance comes from folk who had very straightforward labours perhaps in spite of their birthing techniques - and it would have been straightforward anyway. I genuinely think that we are made to feel much more in control of labour than we actually are - I think if you acknowledge that there is a biiiiiiig quotient of luck / randomness involved its easier to be kind to yourself after if things go a bit off piste.

Goats you had a spinal and could feel to push? I hadn't realised a spinal block could do that. I had a spinal for my emcs (a hyperstimulated induced b2b labour that was intense but I managed on hypnobirthing even with midwives offering epidural). Early on g&a was kind of forced on me but made me sick. Which was worse than focusing on breathing though the continuous contractions! I remember the utter numbness of the spinal as freaky (though was aware of the internal rummaging).

And when we found our doula we specifically went with a woman who'd had all types of births (emcs, vbac, planned section for twins). I agree that childbirth advice tends to come from straightforward births. Certainly some of the doulas we met with seemed to have sneezed their babies out (which is why they'd become doulas). And I didn't have pain relief in labour for 3 kids (bar the spinal for surgery). And I definitely think women should have any and all pain relief they want. One of the big pluses of the U.S. system seems that (well-insured) women get that and as a result are much more positive about their birth experiences (my evidence for this is purely anecdotal).

Well, I've read my notes and I'm a bit confused as to what I ended up with. They couldn't get the epidural sorted, so gave me a 2 hour spinal while they did other epidurals. There was a specific time period they wanted to give me rest for. The epidural drip stuff was hanging up and I had a top up button - but the midwife said it wouldn't do anything yet - I pressed the button without really getting what it was for. They never came back to faff more with epidural, so I've ended up knowing I could feel enough to push and slightly move my legs, but not know which painkiller option was doing the job. The discharge midwife read through my notes with me and said it looked like I'd been lucky with the end of a spinal as it was wearing off. But she was in a hurry. Who knows!

It's nearly bed time again....hope everyone has a good night of sleep! I've got a headache so DH is doing the bed time feed to let me have a sleep. I've been feeling a bit down for not bf but tonight is making me glad we're ff!

DH is 'feeling tired' so I hesitantly offered to do all feeds. He had been doing one any point between 10 and 1. He took me up on it just as i had settled R downstairs. So I needed to move him up to bednest - of course he's woken up, been sick and ugh. So feeding again - he literally feeds constantly from 5 to 9 every night. If I ever complain DH uses it as a weapon as to why we shouldnt have any more.

Just hope he settles so I can get some sleep. He's puked a fair bit today - got all in his hair, my hair, everyone's hair.

Spent most of the descaling the steriliser after last nights panic - seems to work much better now. But now don't need it given DH isn't feeding him tongight!

Our friends came round this pm.
In their 2ww for ivf. So hope it works out for them

Bump you could be having a period, you'd be very unlucky to have one so soon if BF but you could.

I'm seriously thinking about finding some kind of utility belt or caddy that can hold the things that I constantly realise are just out of reach when I am trapped under a comfy baby - remote controls, drinks, kindle - that sort of thing. Every time lovely DP makes me a cup of tea he puts it at my feet where it is impossible to grab it.

Can someone put the word out that biscuits/chocs are a far superior gift than flowers for a new mummy. I keep getting flowers but only own one vase whereas my capacity for chocolate is infinite.

Rudy my sister keeps saying she's going to invent a new Mum utility belt and pitch it on dragons den!

Tell her to hurry up yellow, I had to shove muslin, kindle and nipple shield case down my bra today so I could carry baby downstairs.

Looks like it's going to be a long night here. Baby Badger has been feeding since 8:30pm. She latches well, feeds for a few minutes, then starts pulling away from the breast (trying to take my nipple with her, ouch) and thrashing her arms and legs (particularly pinching, punching and grabbing my boob) until she comes off. Then she does a lot of frantic hand-eating, back-arching and single squalking cries until I put her back on again. Nothing - not winding, rocking, wrapping, singingm etc - seems to break the cycle even though i know she's exhausted now, as am I. Anyone have any ideas? might it be because she's not done a poo today?

Yawn!! Baby literally asleep all day now has been awake since 11.30pm . Nescafe will make a good profit from me this year every cloud eh ?

Badger sounds like she's doing the fussing to increase your supply thing maybe? Or she can smell something in your milk she's not keen on? What have you eaten \ drunk?