March 2013- the one where plonk gets married!

[Gerrythetootallgiraffeswife]

Perilously close to filling the old thread suddenly!

Mn swears that hanging a wet towel in a room lowers the temp a couple of degrees. If you have a fan, stand a bottle of frozen water in front of it (in a bowl!) to create a cooler breeze. Also, I have to close the door to get him to sleep but I open it again after he's asleep. The back of the house is coolest and I have the window open and a fan into the hall to get that as cool as poss before opening the door. Muslin bags are great btw (must order some more). Also, I do bath deliberately cool and give pre bed milk naked and less snuggled in a towel than normal. (Baby naked, not me ).

Gerry - hope it laid the foundations for future discussions. And here's a bloody hug.

Well done for having the talk Gerry. It's very brave to face your demons, whatever their guise : husbands, idiot boys, gove. Your strength and tenacity are incredible, and you maintain your dignity through incredibly tough periods. Next year sounds better professionally, and hopefully personally too.

Stormy retail in busy, hot shops is good motivation no? Days like that used to make my mind race, thinking of all the other places I could get with only a fraction of the energy it took to work in that environment.

Doli I have no sleeping tips as by 6.30 ds is basically begging for his bed. But it's horribly hot and I really do sympathise. Last night ds woke at midnight and wouldn't settle. My patience span is about 4 minutes tops at that time of night, so I booted dp into the spare bed and just coslept. No real suggestions because I think you're not an enthusiastic co sleeper, but I'd use all the short cuts.

Yummy how long has ds been at nursery now? The first 6 months, from mid October to April, were bad for us. He got everything going, didn't manage a full week for about 6 weeks on the bounce at one stage. It sucks, and it's so relentless and heartbreaking at the time, but it does get better. I promise. In the meantime, hugs for you both.
So. Anyone noticing this wonder week? What I thought was WW before was perhaps just molar fun. But now...now when I'm stretched so thin I'm basically transparent, ds decides to go into full blown ww mode with his clingy cranky cry-ey shit sleep. I should've paid closer attention to the book when I planned this wedding! Oh and the marquee people can't deliver to us on the loosely agreed day anymore,the day we agreed in December. It's coming tomorrow.

Normally, doli, we get Fartypants to sleep by putting her in bed, giving her some milk, making sure she has Zebra and dummy, and leaving her to it. Not tonight though. That weird barking seal cough is really distressing her. At half nine I went in because the cough had led to crying. Oh my word, it was bad. Every time she paused for breath while crying, she did that cough, and that made her cry more. She still won't be comforted by cuddles in that sort of state, so we had half an hour of screaming, barking, and throwing herself around. I ended up in tears too. Then she threw up all over us both, and that made her scream and barkcough even more. Eventually she wriggled off me and made her way to the stairs after the cat. Barkcoughing mid-meow. I carried her downstairs, she wriggled down again, and trotted straight over to the kitchen counter and pointed at the calpol. After that, quiet stories downstairs. When she started ordering me to turn the telly on, I figured the calpol had kicked in, so it was back upstairs and tucked in to a 2.5 tog sleeping bag, because the 1 tog is covered with sick. All quiet and calm when I came downstairs for this fag, but I think we're in for a rough night.

My question is: how do you persuade a distressed baby to even consider collecting? I thought snuggling up and going to sleep with me might help, but she just screamed and flailed and couldn't calm down.

Stormy has she got croup? Wrong time of year I know but barking seal cough! YouTube it and compare.

Awww poor fartypants. stormy you have a doctor in the making, she knows when medication is needed.

After a dose of calpol and ibroprufen, change of nappy, some milk and a quick play of the tablet ds is settling down again.

I hope you are all fast asleep and not counting sheep like me.

That sounds horrid stormy. Off to the gp again for Fartypants. I hope it goes away quickly.

Getting a distressed baby to cosleep here is the solution if that makes sense? Whenever he's been really distressed at night and cannot be left to calm down I have just put him in bed with me. Bear in mind he was heavy from about 4 months, like 16lbs, and I found it torturous to either pace the floor with him or leave him to cry. So I've always done it. I get into my bed with him and give him cuddles (sometimes milk too) until he's calm enough to lay down and sleep.

My cleaner starts today!

Wotta you won't regret the cleaner. Believe me. Coming home to a clean house just can't be beaten!

Stormy oh no poor farty pants. We had croup here in the spring and it wasn't fun. It didn't last too long though, so hopefully you'll be through the worst of it soon.

Thanks for the sleep tips. I'd co-sleep if she would Plonky but DH's dedicated training to get her out of the habit in the early days has been just a bit too effective. She will not under any circumstances entertain the notion. I tried it last night, but her attempts at gouging my eyes out and climbing over the head board convinced me it would be safer all round if I binned that idea.

I eventually got her to bed by a) letting her stay up until 11pm, eating bread sticks in the kitchen in just her nappy, b) putting her to bed in just a vest, and c) sleeping in her room so that when the temp dropped a bit at about 2am I could put a sheet and a thin cotton waffle blanket over her. The putting the sheet and blanket over her stage of this cycle had to be repeated every half hour or so. It's like she break dances in her sleep. Guess who's tired this morning?!!

Oh she's up. Better go.

This damn heat, eh? It's so warm and both DS and I have a cold because our bodies don't know how to work properly in the lovely, warm weather. This is the first morning in MONTHS that I haven't woken up at 6 to make sure I'm showered and dressed before DS woke up. I'm still in pjs and unshowered. It's liberating!

We had a rough night last night too. I tried cuddles and stripping him off but once we put the fan in his room, he was crying to go back to sleep. Like his mother.

stormy I hope Fartypants is feeling better this morning.

Hey, plonk, guess what? 4 days to go

Ooh, DP just text to say he's finishing work at 12 today. I might even wait to shower til then. I feel crrrrazy

Ah, Plonky, it's the "until calm enough to lie down and sleep" part that fails here. Other barkcoughing wake ups last night, I left her to it, and every time she stopped crying after a few minutes. Seems like my presence just distresses her more.

It was indeed a rough night though. I need matchsticks for my eyelids, and Fartypants looks rough as hell. Going to ring the doctor in a bit. Betty, I suspect you're right about it being croup. She had the Darth Vader breathing when she was worked up last night too. Please tell me croup is one of those one time only illnesses?

Stormy and Doli I guess that if you've trained the sleepy cuddles = comfort thing out of your toddles then it'll only cause more, erm, excitement. I think DP would rather things in our house were like that, but I am disgustingly lazy cannot hack the up-down-up-down of a poorly toddle that won't sleep. I have no tips for you, but I do have a big bottle of damson gin at home that I'm happy to share once this is over.

Wotta you lucky thing you. I misread your post at first. I thought you said you had a cleanser coming. I was going to ask, 'ooh which one? Clarins? Burts Bees?' until Doli mentioned a tidy house. I'm very jealous!

Summat aye just four days. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! I'm at my mums waiting for the tent folks to show their faces. They're late (a whole two mins so far), and there's no excuse, they're only coming from Leicester. We also have here a gardener, a window cleaner and a builder. I detect Doli-like disasters in the very near future.

for those who are poorly/tired/stressed, and for the poorly tiddlers.

Yes, I think we sleep trained a bit too well. When Fartypants is tired, she wants peace and solitude and darkness, preferably in her own cot. At least it makes non-ill nights easier. We're at the doctor in a bit.

In better news, the littlest niece celebrated turning nine months by crawling for the first time. I see lots of babyproofing in my brother's future.

Peace and dark and solitude are definitely the best things for illness. It's what I crave. DS is a wriggly sleeper and cuddle monster. Which means I wake up with his arse IN MY FACE on nights he's in with us. He's even tried picking my nose and prising my eyes open.

But by then I assume he's generally feeling better. When it's dark and quiet he just settles with a cuddle. Prize to the first one to say the words 'rod' and 'back'.

Yes, DS loves his cot when tired.

Doli has it right (I hope ) but Plonk there is only one cleanser I could recommend this one

Ds loves his cot too. My comfy bed is not good enough.

plonky ds has only had his first full day last monday. 6 months eeekk!

Nursery said he can't come back for 48hrs because he has dire rear. Work are going to hate me.

wotta please let us know how the cleaning went.

I'm holding out on rod/back comments until we've seen whether he still picks your nose and sleeps with his bum in your face when he's a teenager, Plonk.

Doctor a bit useless. Croupy cough, plenty of calpol, watch it doesn't turn into a chest infection, go back if it gets worse. Twenty five minutes in a sauna waiting room wrestling a knackered snotty screaming monster for that.

Pfft Stormy. Just pfffffft. I hate waiting to see a Dr only to be told the bleedin' obvious.

Yummy work should be braced for this kind of stuff. I know the sector you work is woefully understaffed, so that's tough, but what can you do? Can he go to your mum for a day or so until he's ok to go back to nursery? My old job were actually pretty good on this sort of thing despite their business model relying on an overworked skeleton staff.

Wotta that cleanser is 1/2 my weekly shop. I've been using baby oil on my mush because I like steak more than I like cleanser and we have boatloads of the stuff since having a baby and never figuring out exactly what it's for

plonky I wish my dm was here to help but she has gone abroad for the summer. Oh how I already miss her. Roll on September. Did the tent come?

stormy that is soooo annoying. The other day when ds was ill dm was adamant I needed to take him to the gp. I really didn't want to sit around gp to be told calpol fluids blah blah so I told dm a little white lie that I did take him.

something are you enjoying your lazy day?

Lazy, yummy? It was until DP came home. The reason he came home early is because he invited a friend who we used to work with from New Zealand over for lunch, then told me. I cooked the lunch and they then decided to go on a 2 hour bike ride, leaving me to clean up the lunch mess. While poorly. With the baby. And the puppy. Grrrrr. At least I showered though!

Oh fake god, I am going to have the biggest Bridezilla paddy soon and I have to get it out of my system before dp gets home.

His sister is a bridesmaid. She is basically refusing to come and help early because the best man is also having to stay over night at the same time meaning one of them has to sleep on an airbed on Friday night. She's had a bit of ill health but she's a big faker not that ill, mostly a few minor complaints that have combined to make her feel crappy. She's complaining about the house being overcrowded and won't be able to rest on one night. I have pointed out that she will be in my bed at my parents the night before the wedding whereas I will be on the air bed, but she's making a huge fucking deal out of it.

AIBU to just tell her to come on the day and not help out at all? Probably. Aaargh.

I want to cry/scream into a pillow. They're driving me up the fucking wall with their indecision. MIL and DP are now involved so I can't even have control over my own bloody wedding plans.

Yes you can plonky. You need to channel your inner bridezilla and throw a full on paddy, scream, shout, swear. You'll get your own way and you can just blame it on stress afterwards. Go ooooooooonnnn...

Oh god. I can't stand this. I wish is never bloody asked her.

Turns out she's possibly more poorly than I realised and has had blood tests today - but she's not told me anything. I've gone out and bought an extra air bed just for her. I've got lactose free milk just for her. I've arranged Thursday around the fact that she's coming at 10am. So when she sends me a text (not a phonecall mind) stating that she's not sure she'll be able to get to x by y time and can we rearrange, I am supposed to just say yes. When she asks for a real bed I am supposed to just say yes.

I'm now terrified of her coming and being so ill she can't help, or being so busy that I'll make her worse. And then dp gets home and I tell him about it. Before getting the full details from me he calls his mum to find out what's going on. I find this frankly ridiculous, and quite insulting that he firstly stops me from talking by calling her, and secondly on the phone says 'Plonky's got the details a bit mixed up'.

Sorry for the rant but I'm going to blow a gasket. We had the registrar call today to say they didn't have all our documents, the local authority here didn't forward them, so I've got to factor a 90minute round trip into some very busy days, to fix a problem I didn't cause or we can't get married.

And I've gone and upset SIL.

Deep breaths. STBDH was probably just trying to be tactful when talking to SIL. Can you make the ninety minute round trip her Saturday morning task?

And here are some happy thoughts to cheer you up:

1. DS isn't screaming and making it impossible for you to even think
2. Wine?
3. In one hundred hours you'll be married and drunk and life will be much less stressful
4. The wedding is unlikely to be interrupted by a horde of marauding mongooses (mongeese?)
5. There isn't a 5, because I can't think (see point 1.)
6. You're awesome, Plonky dearest.