December 2012: Now they're all 1

[Barbeasty]

We needed a new thread!

Thanks ddas, yes it is. I'm trying to work out if I should ask my parents if dd should stay at theirs. We have to be there at 12:30 but have no idea when we'll get in. We got some leaflets but nothing on the recovery time or specific to the operation.

5:30 wake up call

For anyone with older children (ddas and WL there's one at Alice Holt www.dragonsandfairydust.co.uk/gruffalo-forestry-commission/

Ouch WL

Here's to a better few days Spotty. I think rising 4 is like the terrible 2s with talking back. It's still boundary finding, but I guess as they're growing up (and becoming older siblings) we're moving the boundaries a bit. And maybe the stuff with your DP's parents is affecting her a bit.

WillYou the last 3 nights we've had 1,4 and 2 wakings. No logic at all.

But DD snuck into our room when i was putting them to bed, and carefully put one of her teddies in our bed "so that A can cuddle it if he decides he wants to go to your bed in the night".

Very sweet.

Woo-hoo 6.30 wake up! I was actually awake before her! I did give her a quick feed at 12.30 as I thought she might have woken herself up rubbing her sore nose on the mattress.
Ah beasty that's cute. Dd2 is quite trying at the moment and she's rising 4. She was never a terrible 2, was always sweet and lovely but she's been a fearsome threenager. Mega sensitive about everything basically rather than bad behaviour, but lots of tears about nothing which is quite wearing. Luckily she's pretty much always nice to T. It's fab that they both love her so much but makes her in bed morning feed tricky with the big 2 fighting to get next to her and stroke her, play with her, kiss her etc!
spotty when is ds's op? I'd be tempted to get dd to stay over somewhere so you can solely concentrate on ds without her becoming jealous. And maybe even give yourself 5 minutes peace as you'll be knackered and a bit wrung out I'm sure.

DH has been a bit useless and annoying today and we're off out with loads of his family for a 60th meal in a min. Smile!

Wine, WLmum. And lots of it!

It's Southampton. Yes I think I might get her to stay at my parents.

Ds is poorly. He's been vomiting since five and has a fever. First round was proper sick now it's just sputum and he's had a grand total of one dip of water. Any advice?

Let me know if you need coffee and moral support during any waiting around bits Spotty

Spotty can you get a grandparent to invite her for an exciting, treat sleepover. So she is having a good time and not "missing out"? I know it would make DD's week.

So long as she isn't going to eat the fish fingers and chips that are served while he's still under anesthetic, so he has to have a jam sandwich on yucky brown bread which he hates.... Still bitter after 30 years, me? Absolutely!

As for sickness I think just keep offering the water. And once it eases off a bit maybe some dry toast or a banana. Little and often.

Spotty, how is he now? Is he at all dehydrated? If your worried i would ring OOH for advice. I hope he's better soon.

WL, i hope you enjoy the family meal.

we have just had a really really busy shift at work my feet are killing.

spotty I'd get someone to look after dd as unpredictable when you'll go in although sounds like you're on the afternoon list but he could be the last one. Ds might take longer to recover post op etc & you don't want to be worrying about dd as well even if she can play in their play area.

Hope ds is better. Little & often clear fluids- google oral fluid challenge for a guide. Keep eye for rashes & if worried just see someone. Hope it passes quickly.

spotty one calpol syringe of water every half hour, if he keeps it down, one every 20 mins, then 10. That way you know how much he's actually had whereas a sip can be variable. Hope he's feeling better by now though.

Dd's going to my parents anyway, def wouldn't have her come, just wasn't sure if she should stay or not. I think she should though.

Ds slept all night has just woken up. Still feels a bit warm will see how he handles breakfast.

Yeah if anywhere close to end if list, by time he's ready to do home and then you drive back from Southampton you'll be knackered & she might be asleep by then anyway.
Glad ds is better.

He's going to be starving!! I have no idea how we are going to cope with nil by mouth for minimum six hours

Kids are funny things. After waking up at around 5.30 all week ds has just woken up at 7.30!! Dd up at 6 but that I can handle- for some reason struggle with anything before 6 even if 5.50 lol

I agree, before six just seems wrong! Ds has been back in bed for half an hour.

Hey peeps, StBX DP's gone for good this morning. He's "really tried" but just doesn't want to be together anymore.

Trying to work out when he can have him etc so that it had the least impact on DS and how much time I get with him. That's fucking killing me actually, that I'll have to had over DS and not see him whenever I want.

I'm okay considering, but haven't rung my mum and dad yet. Can't cope with them being angry at him, just need to lick my wounds. Will have to call them soon as they were supposed to be babysitting tonight. Ho hum.

Really sorry to hear that WillYou

Re contact, it's a difficult one. If it was dp and I there would be no way ds would be staying away over night. Even though I know he'd be fine I think I'd want him to be a bit older.

I would have them babysit anyway, is there a friend you can escape to for a few hours? Drink wine, talk about superficial crap, watch a silly movie...

Willyou, i agree with Pidj still let him go to your parents and go out with a friend. I really hope your ok and we're here to give support when you need it.

In regards to contact, at the moment i would explain to him that he can see J still but tell him that you can make the decision with him as to when on a week by week basis. That you don't want to set out a timetable that is set in stone as both your emotions will be too raw and it isn't an ideal time be making long term decisions. But as soon as you feel ready then you can both discuss a contact arrangement that suits you both.

I really hope your ok and i am sending some unmumsnetty hugs your way. Don't think about anyone elses thoughts or opinions just concentrate on your own and getting over him day by day.

Thanks peeps. I've just had a couple of friends round and my mum n dad will probably turn up shortly as I just rang them. They were supposed to have him here so I didn't want that.

I don't have anyone I can go to tonight as my friends have kids or are away on a hen do. I'm feeling not too bad at the minute. It's better than treading on eggshells and wondering when he's going to leave me. Sure it'll be worse later but I don't think I'll have any wine as it may open the floodgates a bit too far!

Then have a cup of tea with your DP instead WillYou. It sounds trite, but at least now you can plan for the long haul, and start thinking about what access etc you want for the future.

Poor DS. Yesterday MIL shut his fingers in a door, so they're a bit swollen and cut. And today he fell over and grazed his forehead on the gravel in the garden.

Christ he's texting how much he misses us. I'm staying strong but it's taking everything I have. I wouldn't take him back, at least not straight away. I think he needs time in his mums cavern if misery to stew and see how fucking fabulous he had it. I don't want someone who isn't grateful for the wonderful family he has every second of every single day. We deserve better.

He also wants DS from 9:45-5 tomorrow. He can kiss my arse.

I've let DS fall asleep in my bed, and if he cries he can come in here then too! I get to do what I think's best for him and no one can tell me otherwise.