December 2012 - the fourth trimester is nearly over

[MaMaPo]

:)

Mama, it really does get better. R is doing 45 minutes on his mat, 10-15 in the door bouncer or bumbo now. It's clicked this last week.

It's ok to let them cry, they need to exercise their lungs. Your needs - clean kitchen surfaces, quick shower, loo, food/drink - are vital to their continued health. If it gets too much, put them on the changing mat on the floor, walk away and count to 100. Prolonged crying, that potentially causes damage, is 30 minutes plus with no reassurance. 5 minutes with mummy singing while she makes a cuppa is normal R sleeps better if he's had a bit of a wail during the day

My baby is a changeling today. He slept 4, 3 and 2 1/2 hours. Slept in the car seat. Smiled at the people we met while out. And is nicely sparko on my chest now. Monday will send it all haywire for sure (16 weeks) but I'm loving it for now!!

Big saucepan of water. Bring to boil (no salt). Remove from heat, submerge equipment for 5 minutes. R hates the taste of cold-water tabs.

Mamapo it does get better, but it's so difficult while it lasts. Once DD could roll she was happier being put down, and now she's only clingy when tired or ill.
Pidj's advice is spot on, and what a very nice midwife said when she discharged me 1st time.

DD is ill now with a tonsilitis. She had a high temperature last night, and this morning calpol wasn't doing anything. DH called the OOH service and they sent a paramedic! He gave her neurofen, which also did nothing, and made an appointment in the OOH clinic (what we'd wanted in the first place). Immediate diagnosis and 3rd bout since May to require antibiotics.

At the moment I've got A asleep on my lap, DD asleep with her head on my knee, and MIL asleep on the other sofa. Remote controls are completely out of reach

The good news is that I've bought a lovely sling from someone on fb which should come next week, and DH should be home soon from his trip to buy ingredients for cooking lunch for me and MIL tomorrow.

I've had to abandon my risotto half say through because ds decided he wanted feeding dd is being whingy after a lovely afternoon, she'll be fine after she's eaten though. Hopefully dp will be back from football in an hour...

Poor dd Barbeasty I hope she gets better quickly

D was beside himself and seemed in pain so have him a dose of calpol to see if it would help and he's been flat out on me for the past 2 hours. That is totally unheard of for him. Calpol doesn't normally knock him out so assuming he's down with a bug or something. Just hope e still sleeps tonight.

Oh honey, I hope D is ok. Seems like the calpol is what he needed though.

Thanks for all the sympathy. I don't think I was quite clear though - C tolerates being put down while awake, for up to 20mins on mat or in chair. What she can't manage is day sleeping without me. I have many days where I sit on my bed with a sleeping baby on me, for hours at a time. If I put her down to continue her sleep she wakes within minutes. It's just so boring. If I do put her down, to wee or get food etc, my reward is a grumpy baby who I have to help back to sleep anyway. It's not short bursts of crying I can't manage, it's a baby who hasn't slept and is a nightmare.

Today was better though - we took her in pram to Borough market and she mostly slept while we were walking. She even stayed! asleep! when we stopped in a restaurant on the way home, so we had a drink and a snack. 20 mins of her being asleep and me being sat down not holding her was sheer heaven.

As for other suggestions, my husband would happily take her so I could go out, but I don't really have any girlfriends here I could go out with - they either have their own babies, or health issues. I don't have any family here, or anyone who doesn't work full-time. It's tough.

That sounds tough mama D is similar in that he'll only sleep on me in the daytime (if he sleeps at all) and wakes the second I try to put him down. I don't know what to say to try and help other than it will have to get better at some point or I'll be moving to a padded room D won't be out down for more than a couple pf mins unless I'm entertaining him (like hell go on his mat but only if I'm playing with him). It's so rough but she will get less clingy at some point.

How do we do it? I find it slightly soul destroying.

She is being lovely today though - big grins. I think she's on the verge of blowing raspberries. She is looking at me like I've grown another head though - I've lost my voice so am communicating via grunts and squeaks, when anything comes out at all. I guess she finds it pretty entertaining.

Spotty, I made the worst risotto of my life when C awoke after I had put her down for the night. It turned into a gluey, stodgy mess. My husband was very kind about it but it was almost inedible. We have high cooking standards in this house (husband has just put some Earl Grey pannacotta in the fridge for lunch tomorrow as we're entertaining) and I was mortified.

It was only by chance we found out how F would nap in the day. I was out, DH had him asleep on him and needed the toilet, and since f was laying in his tummy, DH put him down on the sofa on his tummy. Obviously once he starts rolling we will have to find a new napping spot.

He has just head butted me and my nose clicked and really hurts

It turned out fine just like normal but ds only feeds for ten minutes, any longer and it would have been a disaster!

hales I do hope dd is ok, it sounds awful. Babies in hospital is no fun.

mama it is emotionally exhausting as well as physically. I know it's tough but it really will get better. Up until a few days ago dd would only sleep on the move or at home in the sling. As I have 2 other dds sitting holding her just wasn't an option. I would have much preferred she go down for a nap but decided fighting it was more stressful than accepting it for a bit. Touch wood the last few days she has stayed asleep in her car seat or pram after getting home and I have been able to quickly rock her to sleep in her pram in the garden. It has made me realise how nice it is to have some time without her on me so I do understand.
Can u sit with her in the sling and read/knit/surf/nap?

If you're really at the end you could start some gentle 'training' such as putting her down when you know she's tired, leaving her to cry for 5 mins, then resettling and putting her down again etc. this method takes a lot of patience - I never had enough but might work for you. You have to make a conscious decision to write a couple of days off too.
Will she fall asleep if you lay with her? Could you then creep away?

Hey everyone! I'm back! I've been watching but changed phone and only just figured out how to sort out mumsnet! Hope I've not missed too much. Well life with 5 is not too much different but I think it helps that baby is great and very settled. We started giving k a bottle for her afternoon feed 3 days ago, which she took quite well so takes a little pressure off my boobs! Hope everyone else is well

Hello everyone, hope you are all having decent weekends.

mama T just started napping more properly during the day at home this week. Previously his only daytime nap was out in the buggy/pram . It's worth experimenting though... Perhaps your DD likes the tightness of being held, what about rolling up a towel (into a long sausage) and putting her in a Moses basket or the pram (depending on what you have) with the sausage towel making it a bit narrower around her head and shoulders. We have a rolled up towel in DS's bed and it seems to have stopped him thrashing about as much.
During the day DS naps in the carrycot part of his buggy which is also quite narrow.
Remember " this too will pass"

DP has been working at a massive IT trade fair thing this week. He had a bit too much fun on Thursday and came home very drunk. I couldn't be angry because he was a very funny if slightly emotional drunk. None of his stories made much sense except that he must have told everyone he met "I have a 9 week old son at home" . Not so funny was him being sick all night still couldn't be mad at him because he was so sorry
Fortunately my mum is here this week and has been happy to help out with everything.

honey when DS1 was a baby you could buy those travel steriliser bags in Boots, they might still do them.

MaMa I really felt that on Friday, it's simmering away all the time but came to head then. It's a completely normal way to feel and will pass, but if there's any way you can get a break, take it! I'm in self imposed exile because DS is such a shrieker at the mo, all I do is the school run and shopping. I've got nothing interesting to say because I don't do anything not baby related!

Sorry to hear about all the poorly little ones.

Terrible night here, my legs feel like jelly this morning. Not sure if DS is coming down with something. It was 35 degrees yesterday and he was really sweating, poor thing.

Welcome back COD

The bulb in my bedside lamp has just blown. Made me jump and now I can't see

Ds woke after three hours but I left him and he went another hour...

mamapo it can be really isolating can't it. - It must be doubly so for you as your friends are in another country. If she is starting to sleep when in the pram then perhaps you could try what I do at home and take her out in the day round the shops, buy myself a little something, have coffee and cake. Eg I live near Beckenham and i sometimes take little Z on the tramlink (which is completely pushchair-accessible unlike a lot of London transport) to Croydon house of Fraser and we wander round the beauty hall and try out what's new, stare at handbags, go to the costa, pop into m&s, and then come home a couple of hours later.

Well we're up earlier than usual as DH just came home from a gig and very noisily got ready for bed. He is just starting to snore so is about to feel a sharp jab in the ribs! He is a very messy b
noisy man. Oh good, dd2 is calling for me now. Could be a long night. They better spoil me tomorrow/today. He was in trouble last year for doing bugger all for me, not even a lay in even though it was also my birthday.

WL all I've got is a card from my mother, as it's "not Mother's Day in Australia". I ask you.

Edward had just had the most explosive nappy necessitating a clean vest and babygro.

Happy Mothering Sunday to me!

I'm still trying to settle dd since DH woke her up 1.5 hours ago. Very pissed off

Oh WL I hope you get your lay in tomorrow

Dp tried giving me my card last night dd came in telling me that they had a birthday card for me so dp came in and passed it to me saying I might aswell have it now! Took me a while to explain to him I didn't want it now. He said 'but dd told you about it now' and I said that its not like I didn't know I was getting a card but I would still like her to be the one to give it to me!

And now he is really unsettled and fighting me at the boob. Not sure what to do with him tonight.

New thread here

Omg was up til 4 trying to settle T (from 1.30) and then at 5 dd1 called to pick up her toy (I've told her that's the last time), T up at 7. Not happy.