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Original poster

November 2012 - We want rattles and we want them now

999 replies

StuntNun · 04/02/2013 09:09

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1671393-November-2012-Vent-chat-or-brag

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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MissMummy1 · 07/02/2013 21:53

Thank you all for your kind words. I am mortified I had to phone his parents to get them to talk some sense into him Blush . After getting both barrels from his mum, hia dad phoned him and told him he was being a prat (I think his dad is the only person in the world he will listenish tooHmm ). Anyway we went out for dinner (mainly so we couldnt get into a shouty match) and talked things through. I asked him how he would feel if Matilda and I actually had left this morning and he claims it would crush his world.. I told him there will be no next time, if he ever tells me to leave again (regardless of intent or whatever crap is going down in the background) I will walk fuck knows where and he will lose us both.

He is forgiven. For now. And he's making a noticeable effort. For now. But I won't forget what he said in a hurry and it will be a while before I feel any kind of security with him again Sad .

Thank you for listening to me right this all down. Feel free to ignore! I am thankful for nov 12 mums and their understanding and loveliness Thanks .

I am unthankful I can't tuck into the bottle of bombay sapphire in my drink cabinet Envy

Evilwater · 07/02/2013 21:53

Hello all,
Sorry I've not read the past posts. N has been the definition of grumpyness! Today I've tried to figure out how much money we could get from the tax credits. What a fucking nightmare! Angry

So the tax people can fuck off, and when they get there they can fuck off some more! Angry

I'm off to see a nursery tomorrow. Wish me luck that N is on his best behavour.

Evil

Evilwater · 07/02/2013 21:55

OMG MM1.
Thinking of you.
Evil

MissMummy1 · 07/02/2013 21:55

sp write Blush

I am a twat!

fruitpastilles · 07/02/2013 21:56

I'm glad you 2 had the chance to talk things through Mm. Let's hope he continues making an effort. Hugs xx

Kyzordz · 07/02/2013 21:57

Glad things are seeming better mm1 hope your dh's good behaviour continues!! Sounds like you've reached a sensible decision and hopefully he won't say somethig like that again.

Sounds like you've had a lovely day evil, hope n is in a better mood tomorrow!

YellowWellies · 07/02/2013 21:58

MM are you OK hon? Am I still OK to come over tomorrow? Was aiming to leave the house by 11.

VQ his comfort feeding through the night does make me think silent reflux. Is he big? Jonas put on weight quickly before he was medicated - his growth rate has now slowed and night feeds have nearly stopped now he's no longer using breast milk as a natural antacid. He could cope with lying flat in the day but not at night. If you want to keep feeding you can treat it very effectively by diet changes - no dairy, soy, caffeine or chocolate - I shit you not. On the plus side I seem to have broken my food =comfort associations. I miss said associations Sad As for meds go for ranitidine then omeperazole - gaviscon and domperidone aren't so hot for BF. Get a second opinion - especially if your mummy Spidey sense is going off!!! Smile

GTbaby · 07/02/2013 22:07

Aww mm men suck.

LO is literally just screaming in his cot upstairs. Not painful sad screams. Just yelp, silence, scream, silence, whine, wah wah. He stops as soon as I enter the room. Hmm will try a 30 second cuddle then put him down again.

MissMummy1 · 07/02/2013 22:14

Thanks yw I'm ok. Forget the message I sent you, tills and I are going to stay in thw village tomorrow so come over whenever you like Smile

Sophiathesnowfairy · 07/02/2013 22:22

mm I bet you felt all crumply when he said that. Big hugs. S good you gt some time together to chat.is so important to spend time on you. Is important for you and Matilda. Thanks

detective whenever you talk about the mess that is your fanjo/pelvic floor /perenium it reminds me of me after DS 1. I thought he had ruined me forever. He twisted my sacrum (man). It hurt to sit down, it hurt to stand up. I weed if I did a star jump, coughed,sneezed and ran. It did get better slowly. I still have a way to go, but is much better, even after DS2. So hang in.

There's always Tena. Grin warped.

ValiumQueen · 07/02/2013 22:51

YW thank you. I hate to think of him in pain and me not doing anything about it. I am stopping coffee and will endeavour to cut the other stuff out. I will also get a second opinion

TheDetective · 07/02/2013 23:14

Kyzord he was fussing with his bottles and gving up after just 3oz, where as 5-6 oz is normal for him.

We are back to 5-6oz and quicker feeds and no fussing with the size 3.

Sophia thank to or giving me a little hope! A colleague has given me some details for a private consultant who used to work at my gaff. She gives me a personal recommendation and said that I can be referred to him on the NHS. I'll have to try an wrangle a referral out of my GP to him. I can't carry on like this much longer.

Kyzordz · 07/02/2013 23:20

detective Maybe try something like infacol or gripe water and see before going back to two's? Or if you don't already, try stopping halfway to wind him? I found that helped Eric with wind, he used to keep hold of his something terrible!

TheDetective · 07/02/2013 23:30

He breaks off when he has wind usually, and then we burp him. If he is gulping and I can hear air go in, I'll take it out and wind him as well. He is very good at getting wind up, it just seems since a couple of days after these size 3 teats, he is burping a lot more, by himself, just any time between feeds, and possetting with it.

Will have a look at the options and see which one will be better. I'm just wary as he has never had any medication/drops of any kind yet, and I don't want to make things worse. Am always very reluctant with stuff like that, I'm not sure why?!

Yet, I don't want to change his teats back as he was fussing so much with them. Confused

GTbaby · 07/02/2013 23:30

AIBU - DH just informed me that he has taken day off, so we can spend some family time together.
Would it be U for me to say. You spend time with LO n ill spend time with the bed?
I'm exhausted. All my preg symptoms seem to be kicking in earlier Hmm. Well the exhaustion n slight Envy feeling.

ValiumQueen · 08/02/2013 01:24

gt I think it is you being pregnant again which is the issue. Were you not, I would say YABU. However you are. Please make sure he knows what a lovely thing he has done, wanting to be off with you both, but explain how rotten you feel, and suggest he has quality father son time while you rest. How you phrase it will make all the difference.

J slept 10 to 1 with minimal fussing so that is wonderful. I hope he is turning a corner.

Pikz · 08/02/2013 01:32

Well done J!

Bit worried here,gave 3oz formula mixed with 3oz of EBM as was running low at 7.30. He woke up just now and only took an ounce...he's never done that. Usually downs a 6oz bottle at this time. The formula can't make that much difference can it?

ValiumQueen · 08/02/2013 02:14

pikz I don't know, but I wouldn't worry. If he is not hungry, he is not hungry. He is getting bigger each day and will need less at night. He has been eating extra recently anyway due to growth spurt.

Tried to put J down after feed. Cue screaming and writhing. Gave me a burp (I had bloody burped him) and he seemed in pain so fed again. I am so tempted to put him on formula and reflux meds as I am sodding hating feeding him. Hating it, but that is selfish.

I will take to dr tomorrow and insist on trying something, and if getting meds into him is too hard, I will wean him onto bottle.

TheDetective · 08/02/2013 02:17

Oh balls I better not moan! I came here to whinge about what VQ is happy about...! Blush

Sleep at 8, woke at 10, fed 2oz, back awake at 1. Was a sweaty mess so did a full change. Sharted mid feed, assumed big poo, no, it was a nappy stainer.. So new nappy again. Full of snot, used snot sucker ad figured he was wide abloodywake now anyway. He screamed the house down but I got out a satisfying amount of snot. Finished feed. Of course he wouldn't settle. So I just put him in the basket and thank fuck, he seems to have drifted off with a bit of white noise, in fact as soon as I put him down really.

Now son, please go the fuck to sleep for at least 6 hours. Pleeeease!

ValiumQueen · 08/02/2013 02:18

The bloody bronchiolitis has blurred everything. He was doing really well before he got ill again. He did one night of two 5 hour sleeps with a 15min feed and settle inbetween. Surely that is not the actions of a reflux baby?

TheDetective · 08/02/2013 02:22

VQ I hated it after 2 weeks. I loved it at first but quickly hated it for too many reasons.

I was selfish to stop at 3 weeks.

You have fed him for over 3 months!

If you need to stop, stop. Remember that it is different this time. You have 2 other children this time and one who is still a baby herself.

J is a different baby too. Every bf experience will be different.

What I'm saying is, you would not be selfish if it had become too much for you.

I think you need some child free time, to sit, relax, clear your mind and think it all over.

ValiumQueen · 08/02/2013 02:22

But PR s LO sleeps fine with bronchiolitis? Sorry, thinking out loud.

Hope you sleep well detective

Please nag me tomorrow until I have made a doctors appointment for him. I will make notes of what YW said and take them with me. I will go kick medical butt.

TheDetective · 08/02/2013 02:25

I forgot to add the second change in for the wet babygrow. Can only assume vom although I was not witness to any vom incidents. Sneaky bugger. I stripped the grow off and shoved him back in the swaddle in his vest. Sod it. It's warm if he has sweated through his previous change! And he has a layer of blanket on top of swaddle!

ValiumQueen · 08/02/2013 02:26

Thank you detective x I want to feed him. I have such a drive inside to feed him but I am utterly fucked. I am dreading the days and dreading the nights. I just want to press pause on the world and sleep. He is a very good baby and he wants to sleep.

Anyway, I will try to settle him again. Wish me luck x

TheDetective · 08/02/2013 02:27

I don't know VQ reflux isn't my speciality. YW wake up Wink.