November 2012 - all the babies have arrived

[StuntNun]

Previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/postnatal_clubs/1629938-November-2012-come-on-stragglers-were-waiting-for-you

Stats list: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1485512-November-2012-Stats-List

tits awwwww hunni I feel for you being pulled in 2 directions with J in hospital and poorly kids at home - I really hope things change for the better very soon xxx

pass poor little love sending get well vibes xxx

sweetpea I am really concerned about your OH's controlling behaviour - pls do not take his word that he knows best - how can he?? Only carrying a child within for 9mths gives you a "mothers instinct" pls talk to your friend and I'd you can your health visitor - from what you say your DH is setting you up for post natal depression!! Your baby needs you more than anyone so keep fighting your DH if you can but if you don't feel you can pls seek help xxx

Had a lovely night out with the girls from work and even had a boogie!!
Dottie was a little star for daddy and has slept all evening only waking for a quick bottle which is contrary to what we've been doing the past few weeks - she normal is awake 10pm til 2am so I'm liking this change - hope it lasts!!!

Thinking of you both pass&tits

MM we find exactly the same as sweetpea with wind and infacol, noticed an improvement straight away and LO hates the taste too lol

My hat goes off to all you ladies who manage a baby with other children

Aw sweet he doesn't hate you at all your DHs attitude is really unfair to you I really think you should talk to him in some way and let him know just how much his comments and stuff are affecting you. He's being really horrible. Every baby and ever mummy has their own ways of doing things but they have to try and number of other things to find what works for them and not just follow what other people say is right

I brought LO a elf outfit for over Christmas, it's so sweet but when I got home and held it up against her I didn't like it so I'm taking it back tomorrow and need to order the turkey for Christmas Day

Hiya is this 3am chat a nightly thing?? Can I join in??

Thank you again for all your supportive comments. glenda PND is a concern of mine as I only came out of a bout of depression 6 months ago - so am an ideal candidate!

Having a decent night with Oscar - second feed of the night with 2.5 hours in between. He is taking more at each feed now and we seem to have cracked the snacking issue. I have had two hour long sleeps and hoping for another after this feed.

Thinking of those with poorly babies - must be heartbreaking

Hi debbie There is usually somebody around at this hour

debbie I pretty much catch up on the days chat around this time during a feed!

sweetpea I second what everyone has said. I find dh can settle LO easier than me too. I mentioned this in passing to my midwife and she said think of yourself like a sweet shop. Baby can't help itself as soon as she smells you. She wants you thinking there is food/comfort and the only way they can express this at this age is by crying . Do far from LO hating u, her bond with u is already deeply ingrained .

Not sure how ur DH will take it, butI too think its worth telling him how he makes u feel when he undermines you. It's in his interest too that you feel can feel confident with the baby and able to learn to settle baby yourself in your way and to do this you need his support and encouragement

Hi Debbie :)

sweetpea I take it back. My DP has nothing on yours :( Can to talk to him? what he is doing is horrible. Is he like this generally, or has this just started because of the baby? Might you find it easier to write him a letter explaining how you feel, rather than talking face to face?

kirrin I actually sent him a long text after talking it through on here. I still dont think he really gets it but has said he wont do it again. I know that he will though so not really sure what our long term future is. I am desperate to avoid PND and he is certainly not helping matters.

He has always been like this to an extent. He is always right. He is a manager at work and I used to be a manager alongside him until getting made redundant and he was the same then - his way was always the right way. He treats me like a member of his team - telling me what to do and telling me off when I do something wrong.

sweetpea - sending confident good luck wishes your way. Repeat to yourself that your doing a wonderful job.

Sweetpea - I'm so glad he at least responded well to your letter. Also glad you are having a better night. Hang on in there. If OH would be receptive I think it is worth suggesting he goes out for an afternoon leaving you to get used to being with mini sweetpea by yourself so you can start to find your own way. Please remember your baby needs you.

Dixie - I also find it much easier when dh is around. Mine is a farmer - so usually out at least some of the time 7 days a week. Also when he is here, he really likes cuddling dd1 in front of the telly- which doesn't fit with my goal of getting the telly off, playing with her and trying to help her learn to walk and talk! He is trying really hard to be supportive though - he is just exhausted too. Really good luck today. I'm sure you'll be great.

Is anyone finding that night feeds are getting harder and harder?? I think I might go and stay at my mums for a night this week so she can do a night for me

Lane - I hate it when people do that. Dinges crossed toucans LO stay well.

I have had the theme tune to mr bloom's nursery going round in my head since yesterday evening. It is infuriating!

I'm glad you had a positive response sweetpea Hopefully he'll start being a bit more supportive now. bryzoan's idea about him going out for a bit and leaving you to it sounds like a good one to me.

Fingers crossed your'll all escape noro virus lane There seems to be a lot of it about at the moment.

Yes nervous - night feeds are getting harder and harder, which I suppose is natural as we are all getting more and more tired. When N woke at midnight last night I just wanted to cry - I'd been asleep for 25 mins and just had visions of her waking every hour. At least on previous nights she'd slept a 3 hours or so before starting the hourly wakings. Actually though, she was pretty good last night. 00.30-04.30 then 05.15-07.10 - out best night yet I think.

Dinges = "fingers", and toucans = "you and" !! This phone is a nonsense generator.

Dd1 is up now and dh has left for work. Luckily g is settling again I think after his last feed. Goodbye night shift, hello day shift...

Oh tits and pass,you poor things and your poor babies. Sending you positive thoughts for their fast recovery.

mm, I had the same problem with L last week and a couple of days of infacol sorted it. The same as you, I was worried that it may be colic as the crying was inconsolable, but it stopped. I've been a bit slack the last few days of giving infacol at every feed and I've noticed he has got worse again so for me it definitely works. I have read that it won't necessarily work for everyone though.

Night feeds are starting to hit me too!! Last night/this morning I could not get back to sleep!! I just lay awake. Ds typically for the first time self settled and fell straight back to sleep!!

He's still totally worth it :)

sweetpea it always astounds me that men act in such a way. I imagine my fil was like that. I have nothing to suggest but please do speak to your hv about it as they will offer additional support for you. Also keep talking on here.

Hope the poorly babes are getting better.

A week today is Xmas eve!!! My tree is up and decorated I started wrapping last night while ds went on his play gym (and didn't scream!! It looked like it might becoming a very expensive cat bed!!)

Oh can I have some opinions please. We asked for a playpen from fil for Xmas. He's got one, which I need to collect from tesco. I'm now not so sure about using one? The dogs are fine with him, so not sure is necessary? Anyone use one?!

horsey I defo used one alt, when they are moving around it gives you a moment to go to the loo and knw they are safe, open the door, make a cuppa, turn your back for a minute.
X

sweetpea sending hugs. For me, the hardest thing about being a first time mum was learning to have confidence in myself. Your partner is being a knob. Have confidence, your baby adores you, and cuddles and milk are really the main thing they want.

I told DH that DS hates me last night. DH settles him instantly too, whereas he cries a lot with me.

Saturday night was amazing. Down at 7pm, I woke him at 10, back down at 11, awake at 3, down at 4 and I woke the whole household at 7.30. He fed well, latched correctly, was winded easily, slept in crib each time. Thought we had utterly cracked it.

Last night was awful. Colicky, wouldn't settle, wind wouldn't come up, took forever to get him down, he slept in chair thing again as wouldn't lie flat.

One step forward...

Hand holding to all one having shitty times for whatever reason.

Yeah they're great Horsey, I had mine in the kitchen last time so I could do the washing up or cook something while DS2 played with toys in a safe place.

It's hard for FTMs to see the light at the end of the tunnel. This is the hardest bit right now, at six weeks it gets easier, at four months it gets easier, at six months it gets easier again and so on. Then they hit the terrible twos and you want to send them back! But it doesn't last forever. And at least we have this group to keep us going through the tough times. I wish MN had been around when I had DS1.

Quick question. How long do pregnancy hormones stay in body? DS is 6 weeks.

Am experiencing very vivid dreams and food is tasting funny to me. These are the two symptoms which tipped me off about each of my pregnancies.

Am hoping that am just so knackered am practically hallucinating re the dreams and that is all it is.

My LO used to wake every 2 hours in the dot but now I'm lucky if she goes 2 hours, she's done a couple of 40min stints and like to go about an 1hr 20min aswell I thought as they get older they were ment to gradually get better not worse

Does anyone use those nipple cups to collect leaking milk while feeding on the other boob? I never really leaked with ds1 but seem to be doing so loads this time and seems a shame to waste it.. Which ones do u use?