October 2012 babies - we meet them at last!

[YompingJo]

Getting thread in place in readiness!

Sorry to dive in and out of the thread at the min- spending all days at scbu an just getting home for tea, expressing and bed (and more expressing). Was just wondering what kind of levels of milk is classed as 'normal'. LO is still mainly being tube fed in small amounts so I don't know how much he'll need when actually feeding properly but when I'm expressing I'm easily getting 120mls from one boob on three hourly pumps (what has been recommended) - does this seem excessive?

october sharing the BFing feelings. Had a wobble last night after HRS on the sofa with my poor nipples getting chewed. Think my downer on BF was connected to missing my DD. At least if I was ff, then DH and I could share childcare a bit more evenly and I could take her out to do things when DH was home. Currently not really confident to manage them both (unless it's coffee at a friends etc) as latch isn't easy on a bech etc!
As I fed DD with formula (cracked, bleeding nipples and exhaustion made me crack at 2 1/2 weeks) I'm pretty happy that he'd be just fine if I stopped. But, i do remember the faff of bottles - esp at night and when you're out. Think I'm going to try and get to 6 weeks - another 3 to go! (sure things got easier with DD at that point) and see how I'm feeling. Just feel I need be a mother to both of them and I can't do that stuck on a sofa shouting directions at DH :-)

We also had sleep from 1/2 - 4/5, which for us was an all time record, hoping it's the beginning of things to come

Good luck to everyone who's partners are back to work tomorrow.
And to those who are looking forward to preschool / school drop tomorrow morning off after half term! Xx

I too hav first day alone tmrw, just me and DS....... Oh dear!! Perhaps we can all meet up for cuppa!!! If only! X

ugh. been trying to settle baby squid all day as absolutely desperate for even 5 or 10 minutes cuddle with boyfriend, but she's not having it today. It feels so unbearable sometimes, with him right here, but not able to put the baby down. I miss him SO much even though I see him all the time. And I managed to put baby down for an hour or two most days this week when he was at work so it just feels so unfair I can't when he's around all day.

He's taken her off to watch the football now to give me a break, I think we were just winding each other up trying to settle her together. People told me so many things about how hard having a newborn was, but no one ever mentioned this bit.

People keep saying it gets easier and it has got a bit easier last week or so, and I've managed loads of stuff on my own that I'm really proud of, but I just need some time with my boy so badly right now :(

angelico have you looked at stretchy wraps? It's just a big length of stretchy material, so you tie it yourself. Might be more comfy as you can fit as tight as you want. Moby or Kari-me were recommended to me for newborns by my local slingmeet.....DS loves it :) tying is fine, just needed practice first with one of DDs dolls :) we use this wrap in this position

www.littlepossums.co.uk/information/stretchywrap.html

I bought off the same website x

Same springers - already giving a bottle at night, but thinking of making the transition by 6 weeks. Good luck!

huffle good luck with first day. Do you have plans to meet friends? I'm already petrified re DF going back to work but am trying to get together a schedule of friends and mother and baby groups so I do something sociable every day. Otherwise I could be v lonely, particularly as DF is out from 730am til1030pm three days a week with uni.

Oh squid that is tough. I think the bond with DF is what is pulling me through this tough phase. I hope Jess settles and you get some time, even if less than you wanted.

honeymum I'm afraid I know nothing about expressing but didn't want to ignore your post. One of the books I have says that in the morning you should be able to do 60-90ml in fifteen mins. But ask the scbu? Sure they've plenty of experience with this.

Hey hey, still here. Thanks for thinking of me squid . I manage to read most days, or nights during feeds, but have no idea how you all manage to so often. Where on earth do you find the time? I need both hands to feed at the moment which doesn't help.

Must be something in the water at moment, we also had good night last night and very peaceful day today. Feeling victorious and organised, all washing is done, had bath with baby this morning - she didn't poo but the little strands of blood drifting around were a bit off putting... lochia-tastic . Off tomorrow to visit girl from NCT group who had similarly traumatic labour to me (must get round to posting birth story), she and her DH sound like they need a listening ear so we are going over en famille to take them lunch and sympathy, so she can talk to me and her DH can talk to my DH. So many people have been so great and supportive to me, feels like good karma to be able to do the same for someone else. Then second cranial osteo session for baby who hopefully won't scream quite as much this time .

Bf has gone smoothly today. I got cross with all the pillows and fancy holds I have been trying and just grabbed her in cross-body hold and plonked her on and hey presto... Under no illusions the peace and harmony will last, but enjoying it for now!

What else... Got very earlier with DH's sister who came for visit. Brought 2 young kids with her who she barely controls. Got us to give them paper and coloured pencils and they made a mess and she didn't tidy it, just went home! Grr. DH determined we will be better than that when our child(ren) are older!

Alice 15 days old today and I think she is most beautiful thing I have ever seen. She is so tiny (relatively speaking! ) and fragile and soft and perfect! She was 7oz up on her birth weight a few days ago!

Sorry for all who are facing bf woes, I have found it a massive struggle, it feels like it has suddenly all come together today but I've felt like that a couple of times before then it all went wrong again, so trying not to feel too pleased! I have some papaya cream which is nicer than lansinoh, smells nicer and seems to moisturise better too.

Also sympathy on lack of sleep. DH and I take it in turns to have massive meltdowns about this. What works best at the moment is me going straight to bed after evening feed, and DH either staying up with her or dozing in the nursery with her in her cot, then he brings her through to me for next feed and he goes back to bed and I take her for rest of night and basically feed her until she sleeps, then she sleeps on bed next to me or in carrycot. I miss him but things are much better when we've both got a bit of sleep so this is how we're doing it for now.

Best wishes everyone for a good night. Wish we were all local and could meet up for tea and cake!

Thanks Springers - have a Kari-Me just haven't quite got the hang of it yet for the upright position and no way DH would use it.

HELP!!! Same ducts are blocking again this evening - I can feel them :( Why do these bloody ducts keep blocking up?! Anyone got any ideas?

That was meant to say "no idea how you all manage to post so often.

X-posted Yomping - good to 'see' you :) You are wise about the baby sharing, we are having to do the same but like you and Squid I do miss the DH - sometimes it feels like the bean is always in the way or we are passing like ships in the night. But when we had our really good evening last night we were all able to hang out together so clinging on to that...

yompimg is that Lucas'pawpaw ointment by any chance? If so, bravo - you have found Australia's secret cure-all. You could heal a cracked femur with that stuff

Hi!! I just wanted to post quickly as I saw the words "lucas pawpaw" ointment pop up- IF you can get it, GET IT. It's MIRACLE stuff!! When we have visitors from down under I get them to bring me a pot every single time, takes ages to use it all up but oh my god, its wonderful!

Hoping to join you all soon- Not long now!! BIG HUGS xxxx

I love Lucas paw paw too. I get it from here.
www.pawpawshop.co.uk/

Clunky website but good price and inexpensive p&p. V quick too.

I hadn't thought of using it in nipples - is it ok for baby to ingest?

Baby Yomping doesn't complain. It's ask natural so think it's fine. Mine is not Lucas, is company called phytocare.

Baby doing that annoying thing where thinks is hungry then falls asleep in front of nipple, only to wake when put down, demanding food, and repeat several times. 3 2 1 relax!!!

All, not ask. Damn You, Autocorrect!

Ah that magical sequence - feed, change nappy and clothes where nappy leaked, baby vomits all over clean outfit (and mummy and floor, for good measure), change clothes again, feed again to calm down after changes... Repeat ad infinitum.

I hit the wall last night, had bit of a meltdown on DH as I'd managed about 2 hrs sleep in previous 24 hrs, and he hadn't been able to help as he'd been away on Saturday, then too drunk, then too hungover. He tried to settle DD but makes so much noise doing it that I don't really get much sleep. Anyone else struggling to teach DH how to settle baby? Mine gets really frustrated and ends up losing his cool and swearing at her when he doesn't know what's wrong, then he gets in a state afterwards and feels rotten. He just needs to build up confidence (and patience) and recognise that she often doesn"t know what's wrong, so just needs cuddles, but I don't know how to help without seeming like a know-all.
All in all I reckon he owes me a weekend! I've now managed a couple of hours and feel much better - and love my little girl again! Even if she seems to have suddenly forgotten how to latch...

Hope everyone else is sleeping... X

Clocking in after the half five feed here.

Really shit sunday, baby not slept AT ALL between 5am and 2am - are they ok to be awake that long!? We are exhausted. Boyfriend was heroic, did have a few hours sleep in the late evening while he took her,

She looks thankfully a bit sleepy now so I won't stay long

yomping I have mastered the art of one handed (and no handed, when lying down) breastfeeding so that is how I am boring the forum so often....

Ugh I feel awful. Wailed at my mum last night, she might come up again. Now I feel guilty, even though I know she loves it. Repeat to self: it's just a bad day tomorrow might be different. Now it's 6am so I guess it is tomorrow, I don't know whether to get up (it's less frustrating) or try to sleep more (so tired...)

maybe try a little more kip. jess is dropping off.

love to all. xxx

11pm here, trying my best just to kerp up with the reading. Ds is asleep. Mil suggested only feeding on one side at a time each session to reduce the crying in the evening and get little one to sleep. Well it seems to have worked tonight and i should be sleeping, but my other boob now retells like it is going to burst and am continuously leaking and can't sleep. Blasted! Now laying here wishing Ds would wake up.how stupid is that ;-)

Hopping everyone is having a good sleep tonight especially Jess. Sounds like she needs it!

MrsC poor you. U r allowed a melt after so little sleep. DH does need to learn more, hopefully you both find patience to do it. Mine comes out with pathetic comments like He doesn't like me, or He will never calm down. But getting better and actually sometimes I secretly decide baby doesn't like me as daddy getting better at calming and all I can do is shove boob in mouth!. Hope u get somewhere with him soon.

Beeble I'm intrigued as to why one side feeding would help calm? Do tell! But surely non used boob highly full and sore??!

Squid I'm sure today is better day. Touch wood, but don't seen to get 2 bad days in row........ Think they tire selves out so much they become more cooperative!

We've just had 4 hrs followed by 2. Convinced the 2 only due to dirty nappy. Bedtime resolutely 11.00-30.Hav tried to bring earlier by moving earlier naps but he does not agree. I think he is doing rather well to hav a bedtime. Famous last words, should not hav said that!!!!!

On own today then. Bit worried I will end up feeding him all day and not know what to do with! Every decision thus far has been made by DH and I together! And I mean everything, will we change him yet? Do u think that's enough wind up? Will we put him down or sleep on me?? I love my DH so much, feel so sorry for girls who do this alone or have tosser chauvinistic OH who think is a woman's job!

Well DS has had 15 min feed then 15 mins asleep on tummy while I type. Time for us all to go back to bed, fingers crossed!!

Happy Monday all, love and organised vibes to all going it single handedly from today!! xx xx

I feel like a new women - 2 stretches of 4 hours overnight! Admittedly one of them was achieved by dh pacing up and down with her for 45 mins first but I slept through that bit. We have agreed that he gets to sleep while I feed her then he does nappies and settling duty. We also have w new transfer strategy - I now feed her on her Moses basket mattress - slightly mad but seems to help a bit! Not holding my breath for another good night tonight but it was lovely....
I am another one who can BF one handed so slow and inaccurate typing is possible. Feeding lying down also a good thing for dozing or just lovely snuggles.
Good luck to all those with dh back at work. You will be fine! And huffle my usual strategy is to take up residence on the sofa and cuddle and feed, if you do feed all day think how good it will be for your milk supply!!
mrsc have you got a sling dh could use to settle her? If baby smiley is fed and clean popping her in sling and walking around usually helps, might give him something concrete to do iykwim.
livvy I agree getting out of the house is the key to staying sane - breaks up the day and adult conversation does help. I too wish we all lived close together and could have tea and cake together.
Love to all!

Angelico Am currently alternating between a BabyBjorn and a Baba Sling - I have a KariMe but just haven't had the will to try to tie it again since failed attempt while pregnant. Will give it another go today... I too have a big cleavage right now (Jesus. I was a B before I went on the Pill, then a C. Now I'm a G) but a long torso. The BabyBjorns are very adjustable because they're designed for men as well as women - have you tried widening the back to accommodate cleavage? Is the length (the bit you adjust to baby's length in cm) right? DS does slobber somewhat into my cleavage - this is really a hazard of upright front carriers. You also need to expand them regularly as the baby grows.

DS has been giving us little smiles over the weekend. He is lovely and plump now. Farting as much as ever.

MrsC DH is finding it hard too. I've noticed that he has started using BF as an excuse to hand her me everytime she cries, but she's not always hungry. He doesn't realise how long you have to spend rocking her to get her to settle and gives up after a few minutes. I've tried to reasure him that he's not failing, it's normal for it take that long but I don't want to come accross as telling him what to do either. He'll have to manage as I'm going back to college on wednesday! EEK!

Will catch up properly later, off to play cafe to meet a friend.

MrsC, my baby forgot how to latch yesterday too! It was so stressful. Yesterday was not a good day, I cried a lot.
We had problems early on on the left side, especially when my milk came in because that nipple is a bit flat. But with the help of the midwives, he got the hang of it and no problems for days. Then yesterday he just couldn't do it. The nipple would be in his mouth but he wouldn't close it, or he'd have it but stop and come off after a few sucks, all the time getting more and more stressed and angry. Then it got to the point where he wouldn't even take the right. He's not normally a crier, only when we get him out the bath or a little grizzle when I'm slow to get boobs out, but yesterday he was so grouchy.
Anyway, after taking a while to settle he slept for nearly 3hrs, then nearly 4. Bliss! And today no latching problems! No idea what all that was about.

Thanks for the nursing clothes links plankton. Managed to pop out and buy a few cheap nursing vests, so at least I don't have to get my wobbly belly out a zillion times a day. Really need to buy more but am reluctant to do so as I'm planning to be back in my normal clothes very soon

at poo in bath, Squid! We always get poos on the towel after coming out nice and clean . DH had his first bath with baby yesterday, they both loved it. I hovered anxiously.

Also at Staples, Elpis! Whatever keeps them happy, hey?!

Angelico do you usually feed lying down? I've heard this can cause blocked ducts.

Huffle, you'll be fine! Feed all day if you want. I've been on my own from the start, but actually I find the days pretty relaxed and easy. I try to get out for a walk every day, starting to arrange more visitors, feed LOTS whilst reading/Mumsnetting etc, stay on top of housework...you'll be surprised how quickly it goes. Had a lovely 2 hour nap today. Still get that "I should be doing something" feeling though.

In other news, I had my first alcoholic beverage last night - a delicious glass of champagne. It was definitely worth the wait!
My MIL is driving me insane. She keeps buying STUFF. Totally unnecessary, overpriced, tasteless stuff. It's so wasteful and I have nowhere to put it...and yes, I'm an ungrateful mare.
And she seems to think that babies should be kept in a bubble. I have a docs appt tomorrow, it'll be my first expedition on public transport, and I won't be able to fit it all in between feeds. I'm really looking forward to it. She thinks it's a terrible idea. It might rain, heaven forbid!
She also leans over me and pinches Baby's cheek or strokes his head while I'm breast feeding. Makes me want to punch her in the face. Give me space! Am I being irrational?

Sorry it's so long (and a bit grumpy)

cherry not an irrational response to space invaders during bf, ime - my niece, 8 was all over me when they came to visit, actually trying to lift my top to see better etc. She's only 8, but seriously!! Her parents smiled benignly whilst I got more and more red faced and narky. I came pretty close to lamping her one [itchy fists emoticon]