Post Grad Brookers - we're in here....

[Biscuitsandtea]

New thread - t'other one got full up....

yes he's home and i think my parents are both just getting over the shock themselves. hope he'll be taking it easy for a bit.

the first thing i automatically said was why didn't they tell me, but i would have been in a total flap and ruined the holiday for DH and DS1, so i think mum did the right thing. it was the day before we left that he was taken in.

it's always been a worry since he's had heart problems, just hope the new medication helps.

No, mine wasn't from them. I'm a bit reluctant to name them again now in case they're going to be in trouble but I already did further up the thread

I made that up then. Maybe that was who Hawthers or someone used or no-one and I've totally made it up

Yes, I think Jen, Too and Hawthers all used First Signs. I'd already got mine by the time I read about First Signs on here. Did you ever hear anything back about Copelands Biscuits? They were another one not on the distributor list but fulfilled by Amazon weren't they?

Just got back from jabs. D fast asleep when we went in, woke up to have needles in and then went back to sleep! This is a baby who hardly ever sleeps in the day so maybe we have turned a corner. Let's hope any side effects don't mess up his night time routine.
Thanks for ergo advice, I kept getting the bottom of the insert folded up on itself when I pulled the carrier up over it. Practice makes perfect I suppose:)

I used First Signs

Never heard anything back from Copelands which I take to be rather telling..... They never responded at all to my email and the distributor people sent me that list that Copelands weren't on.

D still asleep! My boobs are feeling v.full:) typical that DH is home today so is convinced that this is normal and I have an easy life!
I used Born in the end for ergo as they had 10% mums net discount.

Say what!?! A discount on an ergo?!?

What site was that?

Born Direct. We also ordered the v.handy front pouch for when we take it on longer outings aswell as the insert.

I'm feeling like a terrible parent. I am feeling fed up of constantly being with DD but at the same don't feel that I can go anywhere without her. What is wrong with me?

Totally normal, I think, Jen. Can you feed N then hand her straight over to her daddy while you go out for a couple of hours - shopping or for a walk or something? Or you could express and leave a bottle if you think she might get hungry? I think it's really good to have a few solo outings to just be yourself. Feels gloriously light and irresponsible - and then nice to have the baby back again!

Nothing Jen. It feels bloody relentless at times. Have you had an hour to yourself at all since DD was born? Even if it's just a long soak in the bath? I admit I haven't, but I was more prepared for it this time. I was exactly the same as you when I had DS, to the point where at times it actually felt a bit like resentment . That was one of the advantages of then switching to formula feeding, it did then allow me to leave him for longer with someone else and I no longer felt like that.
I went out for 15 minutes alone earlier this evening to fetch DH's suit trousers from the dry cleaners. That's the longest I've been alone since DD was born 11 weeks ago I actually begged DH to not collect them on his way home from work so I could go out and get them on my own! Madness.

If it's more than that and you're feeling low, talk to your DH, just so he knows.

It takes a while to get your head round that feeling jen but it's so normal. You're definitely not a terrible parent.

Agree with the others Jen. As Scarlet says it can just feel relentless! I still often feel like that with ds1 and he is often at pre school or nursery. But if I have him for a really long block on my own I'm desperate for someone else to just read him a story or something, or just someone else to deal with the demands .

I did feel a bit more prepared for it this time too, and in comparison to ds1 I think I find ds2 less relentless now (now that he sleeps or is content for longer spells when awake). Maybe they are relentless in different ways - I get breaks from ds1 but when he's here it is constant (I love that he is chatty but it is just all the time so I can't even make a phone call or anything). And then ds2 is more that I have him with me all the time.

When my mum phones in the evening (seemingly every evening just as we sit down for dinner) DH will answer the phone and my mum always starts with 'is she in?' and I always think 'well where the frig else would I be?'

I think it is so important to get a break - like Scarlet says could you perhaps leave dd for a few hours after a feed and go out? Maybe get your hair done or something? (if it needs it - not saying it does). I've booked a hair appt for Monday and am going to see if someone can come and look after ds2 for me otherwise I'll be on edge the whole time that he'll get grumpy .

Oh and I don't mean that to sound like a moan - I consider myself very fortunate to be able to spend so much time with the DSs, but it's just nice when, say, DH gets home to do bathtime or whatever

Wants where did you find the MN discount for born direct? I just looked on the offers page but couldn't see it?

I'm even worse, I sometimes got that feeling Jen but then couldn't bear to leave DD til she was 11 months !!! Didn't help she didn't take a bottle but i only really started then to get her ready for my return to work and it was only with grandparents

Speaking of hair mines a mess but I'll never make it to a hairdresser with the dts... Think it'll have to be a come to th house one.

I was fine with leaving dd1 for a few hours every so often from about 10 weeks. Grandparents looked after her for my keep in touch keys and she started a day at week at nursery when I worked from seven months.

Maybe bottles makes it easier mentally too I guess.

Dd2 I have been apart from for two runs to the corner shop and one hour in the hairdressers when my mum had her. That's in nearly 21 weeks. I'm not resentful this time too much, except over night when I cry that I need her to leave me alone

Sorry to hear about the overwhelmed No Brookers, especially Jen. I completely relate to what you're saying, I sometimes feel a bit claustrophic as well. Usually it's at its worst when it gets to 5pm and I realise that the one simple task I wanted to get done for the day (like ring a particular nursery or online shop) hasn't happened because I've been dealing with DD all day, and now it's too late to call. Or at 2am when I'm supposed to be waking up to start my share of the night shift, but actually I haven't been to sleep yet because once again I've ended up doing DH's shift as well because he can't settle DD. Sigh.

I have been out without DD though, so far it's worked out to about once a month I have an evening off. When she was 1 month old I went out to dinner (for my birthday) with DH while my Mum had DD. I went out for lots of drinks a meal with work friends when she was 2 months old, and left her with DH. I did the same thing again on Tuesday this week (and DD is now almost 3 months old). I have to say that just the anticipation of the nights off is comforting, and afterwards I feel totally refreshed despite the hangover! I always miss DD really intensely for the whole night as well, so I appreciate her even more for a while after we've been apart for a few hours. (Please note, when I go out for a drink I make sure there's enough expressed milk for DD to last not only while I'm out, but also for another 12 hours after I get home. So I can just pump and dump the alcoholic milk.)

In other news, following DD's 12 week jabs yesterday she slept from 11 to 7 last night!! It was unbelievable. I kept waking up with sore boobs to check she was okay! Surely now that's she's done it once she knows the joy of uninterrupted sleep and she'll start doing it every night, right?

Me too on the claustrophobia/wishing someone would come and entertain M so I can have some time off! I've had one evening out without her, when she was about 8 weeks, I think. She's now nearly 19 weeks. But I miss her if DH takes her out for a bit. He started doing things like take her to the supermarket/for a long walk pretty early on so I could get a couple of hours sleep, but that's stopped now she's sleeping better at nights. When we go to stay with mum/dad/PIL, we take M downstairs when she wakes up at 9ish, hand her over and go back to bed for an hour or two, but that's not very often. I have a friend coming to stay next week (Wed-Sun) and it will be so nice to have someone else on hand just to pick M up when she gets bored of her gym/toys but isn't hungry yet.

Scream, yay for A sleeping through! M did that after jabs too - best possible reaction, I think.

My hair is a horrible rat's tail-y mess with really dry split ends. It's also a weird faded dark blonde, even though it started out as a warm dark brown . That really sunny week in May bleached all the colour out. I swore I wasn't going to dye it again but use my mat leave to let all the colour grow out and start over with my natural colour (which is light brown), but I'm starting to waver. Must book a hair cut and organise someone to look after M! Really don't want to take her with me.

scream, yay for sleeping through! B did it after his jabs on tues, 8-7:30 in the end shame I had The Menace up hourly...
Today at one of those farm/ soft play areas a random old bag woman stopped us to hawk at look at our boys then said 'non identical? Oh what a shame' . I was at her rudeness.

*gawk at

at that woman Dream!! What a crazy lady!

Well done you though for having them all out . How did they sleep last night? How's the HFM? Hopefully becoming a distant memory now?

Yes, we are now blister free and can mix with other children again. Phew. Just in time for playgroups to finish for summer hols All three snotty and coughing still but that seems fairly constant. So I'm doing a sun dance in scarlets honour but for my benefit too!

I have left the boys and DD downstairs in the dentist while I was up there for at least 15 min. Does that count?!