April 2012 - Feeding, Facebook and finally summer!!

[Flisspaps]

Apologies for the rubbish thread title - thought I'd cobble something together though!

Henrietta dont feel usless, I sure your Dp understands you just had his baby 8 weeks ago! Sex for me has only just started feeling normally its been 11weeks. I had stinging the first few times and one stitch with the suction cup too. I think its that area that is still healing.

Henrietta - you did well to try (we haven't yet) and your dp will definitely understand, don't be so hard on yourself :)

Henrietta No way you are crap/useless. Please don't think that. I agree with Fliss's advice.

Another thing I read re why sleeping in the same room is so beneficial is that the baby's respiratory and cardiac systems are much more prone to fluctuations if they are alone. If they can hear you breathe/feel your heatbeat it actually helps them to regulate theirs (amazing isn't it). Also cortisol (stress hormone) levels are a lot lower in babies who sleep close to their mothers. You don't have to bed-share to get these benefits if you don't feel comfortable with that, just keep cot/basket close to your bed (I have one of those three sided cots that pushes right up against the bed but after she wakes the first time she usually sleeps on me.

This is the book in which I read the stuff about sharing a room: www.amazon.co.uk/What-Every-Parent-Needs-Know/dp/1405320362/ref=ntt_at_ep_dpt_1

Henrietta we haven't tried yet either...when DH gets a lie in at weekends we have DD in bed with us all snuggled up, while we drink tea...so not really the moment for sex. And right now it's the last thing on our minds when we go up to bed at night. So please don't think you're alone in this!

I'm planning on keeping L in my room till 6 months or till she grows out of her small crib, the cot won't fit in our room! She sleeps well in there and I can hear her wake for feeds. She doesn't have a flat head but a bold bit at the back of her hair, and her hair is still quite patchy.

She sleeps on a cleva Mama memmory foam mattress. Ita really good and hold her in place.It might be a good idea to get if anyone is thinking about putting them in their cots? Also helps with wind and collic! I brought it from TK max. Worth every penny!

I had a hard few days of bf lots of trapped wind, L crying and in pain. She does bring up the burps but she seems in pain poor thing. Yesterday 7 out of 8 feeds she was crying with wind!

Does anyone else have babies who hid there face with a swaddle or blanket? She now fights her way out of all the swaddled we have- swaddle me, mothercare one and large muslins! She then wrinkles her arms and puts the cover over her face! I wake up and it scare me! So I put her arms back down.

Newmummy, Emily was fighting her swaddle like that & also likes s'thing against her face. I think it's cos she's used to feeling my boob there!! She was sleeping on her side & no matter what way I propped her, she ended up with her face pressed against the side of her pram (which is a Mamas & Papas Zoom & a soft jersey fabric). So; I now put her to sleep on her tummy. It's been clear from the start she prefers this & I have an AngelCare monitor under her mattress. She'll be in our room till she's at least 6mths.We progressed to her Gro-Bag last week & she's happy in it.

Emily still has lots of wind, lots of possetting & a screaming colicky hour every evening. Last night's culminated in 2 huge poos & a suddenly v relaxed happy baby!

Fliss: I like the new thread title! Certainly better than a'thing I could've cone up with!

Henrietta: don't feel crap. I'm sure your DH doesn't want to cause you any pain & appreciates you trying. I remember after my first LO the first few times were stingy & sore, but it (obviously ;-)) got better!! If it doesn't, go & see your GP/Practice Nurse for a gynae exam. It's a v common complaint. With a gentle speculum exam they could v quickly see if there's a problem. Have a glass of wine next time you're going to try to see if relaxing a bit helps. Try not to worry about it.

Bear; thx for that link. The book looks great & is now in my basket at Amazon. I had a v happy afternoon on the sofa suggling & dozing (safely) with Emily. We hold her loads: she's not keen on sitting in any of her chairs & it just feels right anyway! Lovely to know it's doing so many positive things for her development too.

Thank you all for your lovely lovely comments. It's really comforting to know I'm not alone in this. DH has been very lovely & understanding - no pressure at all from him. It's also good to know this is not unusual. I'll give it a bit of time, and then go for a cheeky glass (or 2!) of red and see if that helps.

It did affect my usual zen like state (!) in the kitchen today, but roast beef & Yorkshires happened eventually & we've had a great day - so I feel much better.

I'm still sad about it, but hopefully it will pass in the next few weeks.

Thanks again, you lovely people!

Btw...someone was asking about this page & fb. This is something I would not post on there!!

For those of you discussing flat heads, bear in mind it's FAR more common now due to the fact babies were often put on their fronts to sleep pre-FSIDS, and it rights itself once baby is more upright/mobile - there is nothing you need to 'do' to move baby's head to one side or the other!

Henrietta; just re-read your post & your description if your pain. Wondering if your sutures were dissolving or removed by MW? dissolving sutures are SUPPOSED to dissolve in 2-3 weeks. IME (Practice Nurse), they don't a lot if the time & can cause local irritation & need to be removed like a conventional stitch. I've no experience with Postnatal suturing since the MWs generally look after mums, but in general it happens frequently. It may not be the case, but if the problem persists please do go for a speculum examination (it'll be like a smear). It's really the only way of seeing e'thing clearly down there. Good luck!

Fliss - I thought that might be the case. I have a feeling they're more bothered about it here in the US as a cosmetic thing - helmets were mentioned?! I've never heard any of my UK mum friends discussing flat spots. So I'm sorry if I got you all worried about nothing :).

Helmets?!

Evening Ladies.

Am gearing myself up for a long night. DD just wouldn't settle tonight (took 80 minutes, despite having no proper naps today - it usually takes 30mins max) and I have a feeling she's going to be up wanting several feeds.

She had been going 8.30-5.30, but last night only slept till 1.30, and then woke again at 5.00.

I think it might be time for a bit of a growth spurt - hence the extra feeds. Have actually come to bed now, so I can get a few hours in in preparation - have been spoilt by a wonderful sleeper until now.

Jellybelly that's really useful: I did have dissolvable stitches. DH said he couldn't feel anything particularly untoward but who knows? I'll have to bite the bullet and deal with another potential exam. I need to learn to chill out anyway...

Good luck Jam; may have a similar situation here tonight! Have had a lovely afternoon with DD snoozing on the sofa. But then realised she's fed a good bit less today...she did play a bit of catch-up tonight & I've just put her down. But; think I'll be up before 6 feeding again! Oh well....I've had a week of good nights! Never had thus with my older 2, so not really expecting it to last!

Henrietta; yes, let s'one have a peep. At least then you'll know & be a step further to sorting it. It may well just be lumpy scar tissue, but just in case....good luck! And remember, the person doing it will have done it before. It's a pretty common issue, so don't worry :-)

Vintage; concern re Flat Head Syndrome not at all exclusive to US. It happens here too. I know a mum of twins who both had flat heads. They were either lying in their recliners or sleeping on their backs. Mum fed them their bottles in their chairs as she had v little help & so they were putting pressure on the back of their little heads for most of the day & night. Both had extremely odd shaped heads. No HCP ever discussed it with her, & maybe if they had she'd have changed their routines as much as possible to help it.. ...My cousin's little boy had a helmet for the same thing. The helmets are fitted to the Individual child & help reshape the skull before the bones harden. Apparentmy my cousin's DS was a pretty extreme case & the parents paid for it as its not available on the NHS. I never saw the child, but my mum did & said it was v obvious even when he was v young.

I dont mean to frighten a'one, though. I think our babies are too young for a slight flat area to be a problem, but I guess if it's pointed out as a possible potential problem it's a good thing because it can be resolved quickly now. I think a baby would have to be in exactly the same position for a large part of every day for it to cause a major issue though...

Ugh, growth/development spurt - its like having a newborn feed again - not good!

One thing that can help prevent it is to make sure they spend no less than 2 hours a day in a carseat (I'm sure most babies do spend less anyway - but some people use the carseat attacment to the pushchair instead of the carrycot when they are v small so the hours can add up). Also carrying them around in stretchy slings is great because there's an even amount of pressure around the baby's head.

Re the painful sex topic. With my first dc I had a stitch that did not dissolve. I could feel it with my fingers, it felt like a little hard piece of plastic. After some twiddling it came away . Maybe try feeling the area yourself, it might be easier for you to feel than dh. If not get the nurse to check.

Flat heads- my friends boy had the flattest head I've ever seen. Honestly it looked like one side of her poor wee boys head had been hit with a spade! Dr said it was fine & I can confirm he is an entirely normal looking 3 year old

The wedding was nice if rather hectic, we arrived just in the nick of time. I had to feed ds2 in the church & bribe ds1 with chocolate to keep things peaceful. Dd was good as gold as ever. Wedding breakfast/reception also hectic as there were alot of people crammed in. Ds2 would not bf as I think it was rather over stimulating. Had to skulk off to someone's hotel room to try & get some milk into him. Anyway, rude du was not there (unwell) so I felt a bit more relaxed & did actually enjoy myself afterall. Did put pay to my dairy free diet though, think I will tough out the colic until around 12 weeks or so. If tummy issues with ds still persist after that I will make more of a serious effort to cut dairy. I really have rubbish will power when it cone to giving up milk/cheese/butter etc. I will continue to try giving probiotic drops to see if they have any impact.

Needn't have worried - she slept till 6am.

We are planning to keep Harry in with us until 4months as he already likes the big cot and is fascinated by the animal wall stickers.

Very excited tomorrow we are off to baby massage and rattle time and then have hired a 30min session in the sensory room. If H likes it then we will go every week it gets mummy out of the house for 3 hours on a Tuesday and can only be good for his development and mummy's sanity.

H's uncle and aunt bough him the Fisher Price Rainforest play mat/gym and he loves the music and lights. I can actually leave him for an hour when I do chores.

Feel like a domestic godess today managed to wash, dry and iron 3 washloads make 2 meat pies and 4 cottage pies fo the freezer and run the hoover over. Need to make a couple of stews and then we are done for the day.

xx

Have requested to join fb group. Am BH. I'm rubbish at fb, so have no recent pics on, just old ones of ds1. Will put some on the group page if i can.

Am seriously impressed at those of you making pies and roast beef etc. Tis all i can do to throw some fishfingers and chips at the table atm.

Uni am with you on the fish fingers and chips!

We had a breakthrough this afternoon when DS slept in the carrycot for about 2 hours. He was spark out when I put him in there mind you. Felt like a new woman, managed to read through some work stuff as I'll have to be back up and running in September - this is the downside to going off in January!

All of your babies are beautiful - and the mummies are very glamorous too, of course! Though i think our RL names seem very ordinary after the mn ones. And i'll never remember who's who.

Snap fliss DD is having a growth spurt too, feeding 2hourly day and 3 at nite. Tried.com ! DH did the 3am feed for me last night with an expressed bottle to give me some sleep. Plus its my birthday today.....

We when out to our seafront and feed in public, found and quite spot and use large scarf, was going well untill L started screaming with pain from wind! Poor thing again another day of bad wind. Thinking about going back on the infalcol for a week or so?

For my b'day, me and Dh when to the new Frankie and bennys for a treat, left Lyra with my mum and she did 8 o clock feed with an e goggle. Me and hubby spent most of the time taking about L, how are lives change lol. It Was nice to have a break and time together!

Off to bed now praying she is gonna longer that 3 hrs tonight!

I mean an e bottle hehe! Bloody phone!

I have been spoilt with a baby who slept from 9 til 6! Still shatterred though as I need to learn to go to bed earlier.

Hope all the mummies and babies are well. A has his 8 week check when he's 10 weeks old in July. I registered him at the Dr the day after he was born too - goes to show how busy they are.