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999 replies

TooImmatureTurtleDoves · 14/05/2012 22:05

Thread 2.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Biscuitsandtea · 09/06/2012 18:41

You'll all be relieved to know there has been poo action (from DS2) this afternoon. And even better I managed to get DH to change it Grin. Winner.

However, I have been proven wrong that last night's fussiness was due to the poo as he's the same this evening. Boo. He was up for ages in the night and I can't be arsed with it again. Aren't babies supposed to get better at sleeping not worse?

Now Pet you asked a qn and I've forgotten it - hold on....

Biscuitsandtea · 09/06/2012 18:45

Ah yes the wind thing.

Now I found it virtually impossible to get DS1 to ever burp. Ever. And around this age he would wake about 2am and have terrible wind. Not hungry, just painful wind. And he'd be awake for ages with it. Often resulting in passing wind from the other end. So maybe there is something in what you say Pet? DS2 is generally speaking easier to wind but accompanying last night's fussiness were some mega trumps. Could have been coincidental from poo-gate or could be related, I'm not sure.

But they do eventually get to manage their wind (I hope I hope I hope I hope) Smile

ScreamIfYouWantToGoFaster · 09/06/2012 19:07

Now obviously I wouldn't want to wish constipation on any baby, but DD has 4 or 5 pooey nappies a day, with at least one of those overflowing and ruining her outfit everyday. Dealing with a pooey nappy only once every few days sounds like a distinct improvement!

Dream I didn't realise co-sleeping was a SIDS risk if there are no smokers in the household! Shock Thank you for warning me. This should be a sufficient push to get me to use the bedside cot more religiously rather than just letting her sleep next to me. Might have to ban DH from co-sleeping as well, he gets far more exhausted than me (despite having more sleep Hmm).

I tend to put DD to sleep on her side now. I did a lot of online research and confirmed that sleeping on their side is as safe as sleeping on their backs, with the big proviso that they don't roll onto their stomachs. DD gets really uncomfortable on her back, and she throws up frequently enough that I worry about her on her back. So far whenever she has rolled off her side it has always been onto her back. If she starts rolling forward I would stop putting her to sleep on her side.

We've agreed to give up on our failed bedtime experiment for the next few days, and just observe DD's natural sleeping patterns. So far she doesn't seem to have any sort of regular pattern, which is almost certainly because we have no sort of regular pattern to our days. We're making a conscious effort to stay in more, and get home earlier, for the next week, to see if we can identify when DD wants to be asleep. We're hoping this will mean we can make a more educated attempt to adjust her sleeping patterns the following week, rather than putting her on an arbitrary schedule and then killing ourselves being up all night trying to get her to sleep when she doesn't want to.

Also, there's absolutely no way I could bear to use cry-it-out techniques on DD at this age I suspect that won't change even when she's older but DH is keen to try it out after talking to the other new Dads in our NCT group. I need to get DD on a better sleep schedule asap to avoid having DH getting too hung up on the cry-it-out option. Otherwise I predict we'll be having even more arguments than usual...

Also, Dream, I do think Portland is the largest pacapod. I'm pretty sure I confirmed that using a tool on their website to find which pacapod suits your needs. It's definitely big enough for one, but I seriously doubt it could cope with more than a quick lunch trip out for two babies. The feeder pod only fits two bottles, the change pod did hold 10 changes when I needed it to though. The main part of the bag holds one change of clothes for DD plus an extra top for me. Would that be sufficient for you and the twins?

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 19:20

scream tummy sleeping is 5x higher risk, co sleeping 40 x higher risk. They're better on their tummy than in with you I think. That's why I'd rather put Ben on his tummy than in with me I think, though ideally neither. That's what I gather from this, but accessing on phone so struggled a bit with it. Mostly going from my paediatrician friends advice!

http://www.cjsids.org/resource-center/sids-statistics.html stats here

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 19:21

trying again

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 19:24

It worked, yay!!! My paeds friend said NEVER co sleep until over 6m so i feel bloody guilty atm...

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 19:32

Oops pressed post too soon- I end up with one or both in with me from 5 ish every night...

Don't think it'll be big enough... I'd want it for the 3 of them so with beaker for Isla, clothes for 3 it won't fit. Hmm.

It's all gone wrong routine wise here. Seb woken for his bath so no chance he'll go to sleep. I've got ? another blocked duct so expressed and now not sure if babies still hungry post feed, I'm so tired I was in tears doing bathtime. I really need some sleep! 3 hours in a row would be lovely, 2 would be appreciated... Please boys?!

ScreamIfYouWantToGoFaster · 09/06/2012 19:51

Dream Shock just Shock!!! Thank you sooooo much for that info and the link, I had no idea co-sleeping was so bad! I don't know how that info passed me by! You have literally scared me senseless! Thank you thank you thank you for telling me!

EBIL (evil brother in law) is downstairs right now. DH and him have just got back from taking a walk with DD, and EBIL casually mentioned that DH hadn't been with him as he took DD over to the common, DH apparently caught up to them later. I am hopping mad about this, I have EXPLICITLY said to DH on multiple occasions that EBIL is not to be left in charge of our child. Even before I was pregnant I stipulated this. Seriously, we've had extended discussions about it. Not only does EBIL smoke, he's also the most irresponsible person I've ever met. The kind of person who thinks it's "fun" to chuck a young baby high in the air above his head. The kind of person who darts halfway across a busy road with a big heavy pram just to get across a few seconds faster, even when there's still traffic on the other side. The kind of person who would drop a dummy or muslin on the ground and still give it back to the baby. I am SO ANGRY, I literally want to throw EBIL out of my house right now so I can start yelling at DH. It's going to be a long stressful night...

hawthers · 09/06/2012 19:57

dream good luck with the sleeping

scream good luck with the shouting. How annoying your h has conveniently forgotten your dyscussion.

V quick post as I'm at my m and d's, f is 24 weeks on wed and we are still np nearer to the elusive sleeping through. It was 1, 4 and 6 last night which isn't bad compared to dream but bloody awful compared to too. Separate rooms then I'm v seriously considering a sleep specialist as I can't face much more if this.

musicalmrs · 09/06/2012 20:16

Eeek at those statistics Dream and Scream! That's even more of an incentive to get DD to sleep in her basket. She was doing fine for a bit, then had a few bad nights, and has been semi co sleeping since. Half and half last night. Will persevere more tonight (currently in the before bed cluster feeding session)..

Biscuits and Scream, in general they're a lot better. They get a lot worse during cluster feeding (obviously!), which was probably when I wrote the last post, so they were feeling particularly bad. Biscuits, it's reassuring to know that the post-feed 'feeling' isn't just something I get! I often find it quite painful - which the BF supporter I talked to last week said was probably due to having done some long term damage Confused. Either way, getting better so I shouldn't complain too much..

Scream, can't believe DH forgot what you said about EBIL :( Hope you make him see sense soon. Why would he let EBIL look after her if he does all those things?!

Dream, hope you have a better night.

Biscuits, hurrah for poo action! Grin

Pet, the rushing to the basket thing is precisely what I do now! Don't think it helps that the basket is at the foot of the bed - was easier to put DD down when staying at my parents and it was right by my side.. hmm. "Post grad brookers book in here, doo dah, doo dah..."

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 20:36

He he musical post grad brookers book in here, doo dah, doo dah. Sure its nowhere near as bad as you but I have yet another blocked duct, or the start of one at least. Boo. Permanent damage?! Owch. You poor thing.

The only thing with those stats is it doesn't say, and i can't check on my phone, how many had other factors eg mum had had a drink etc etc. But I don't do 'safe' co sleeping anyway as that requires no bed covers or pillows to suffocate baby with mum just dressing warmly enough etc iirc and it doesn't appeal!

Can't get either of the dts to sleep. There's a surprise. How do you find out about sleep specialists hawthers if they don't improve?

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 20:50

Boo. Got into the risk reduction part of that SiDS website. What, no side sleeping either?!
http://www.cjsids.org/resource-center/risk-reduction-strategy.html risk reduction

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 20:56

[[http://www.cjsids.org/resource-center/risk-reduction-strategy.html risk reduction]

ScreamIfYouWantToGoFaster · 09/06/2012 21:09

Dream side sleeping is only not recommended because of the risk of rolling onto their stomachs, if they stay on their side it's not dangerous. Have a look at this link

musicalmrs · 09/06/2012 21:10

Dream, ouch, another blocked duct? :( The long term damage is slowly getting better, but it explains why I've been in pain for so long - and why it wasn't healing as quick as it should have!

True about those sleeping stats. Still worrying though - and I know my co-sleeping isn't completely 'safe' as per those requirements - though I've been told by midwifes and the health visitor that what I've done is absolutely fine (I was/am so paranoid I've checked with everyone!). Still not happy with it though...

DD likes sleeping on her side too. Rubbish..

Still feeding. Tralalala...

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 21:16

Oh, whatever!!

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 21:19

Err, that's not to your post. my phone showed my other not-link as the last post. I'm totally fed up with the twins. We think their colic is actually worse... I just want them to stop crying and go to sleep. Both coughing, with colds too.

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 21:22

Oh, good link scream, I've been using a back wedge (well rolled up blanket) Blush . Another thing to add to my list of crap parent things...

pommedechocolat · 09/06/2012 21:24

You can buy tube things linked in the middle for side sleeping? i had one for a bit but both mine have been okay on back s gave to a friend I think. If I do find it willing to post to anyone in need.

I have always been a bit anti co-sleeping as to me it feels wrong. Dh has always said I'm being silly so glad I can show him these and feel smug.

scream - omg about your dh and ebil. i know it's his brother but that's HIS tiny baby too!! I would be literally levitating with rage.

hawthers - you're not filling me with hope. I've been reading a book about the science of sleep and 'the baby whisperer solves your problems'. The sleep cycle as 40-45 minutes explains such a lot. it's the linking that's the issue and short naps mean no linking in daytime = more likely to have night time issues. I have been trying to abandon all props (feeding, rocking etc) and have been trying to leave A a bit longer when she wakes. So 'grumbly' cries where the cries are spaced out with good pauses, not escalating in sound I have been leaving five mins before going in. last night at 5.30 and this pm's nap she haas gone back to sleep within five minutes. I've been reading about pick up/put down but haven't implemented yet. I think dd1 did better because of the dummy (like pet's experience) and the 'problem' of taking it away in the next year is worth good sleep. What have you tried so far? I think most sleep specialists will end of advocating a form of crying it out.

pommedechocolat · 09/06/2012 21:26

dream - I've asked among my friends and one reckon she stopped colic with dairy free and the other with cranial osteopathy. Pretty sure you've considered both so no help. So sorry that you're going through this, colic with one baby seems to really impact people so two is unthinkable... Sad

DreamingOfPeace · 09/06/2012 21:36

pomme, they were CS babies though so not squeezed down the birth canal with the head squashing so would that not mean cranial osteopathy out? . I have considered dairy free and asked hv who had a seriously colicky baby herself and his paediatrician said it was a last resort and probably wouldnt help. But tbh I'm nearing trying all last resorts. To echo hawthers, I can't carry on like this...

musicalmrs · 09/06/2012 23:21

Scream, the side sleeping link is interesting, thank you! DD can stay on her side happily, so maybe I don't have to worry quite as much...

Dream, I'm sure my bad parenting list is also pretty high. The SIDS page says not to overdress them. Dressing DD right at night completely baffles me. In the hospital she had vest, babygro, swaddle and blanket which I was convinced was too much, but they told me it was right. Hmm..

Speaking of bad parenting.. DH frequently tells me off for dropping food on the baby (she likes to eat when we do). My best so far has to be minestrone soup.. Blush

Pomme, I have the same Baby Whisperer book. Not sure what I think to it yet, though I'm finding that some of it makes a lot of sense.

fishcakefoxtrot · 09/06/2012 23:52

musical if you are still around, do you have any advice on what to look for in a second hand piano? I am going to look at one tomorrow morning. i am so excited at the thought of having a piano again I'm not sure I can rely on myself to be rational!

Re co-sleeping and SIDS- I thought the statistics were often a bit misleading because they frequently conflate planned bed sharing (appropriate bedding, suitable mattress etc) with sleeping on chairs and sofas, as well as not separating out those parents who were cosleeping after drinking/ taking drugs. these articles some indication of the complexity of the risk analysis and the interaction of the various factors. (I couldn't see how the stats in Dream's link had been gathered so apologies if they are more up todate than the ones in these articles.)

Anyway, no point feeling guilty for previous sleeps. Soon all the Brooking babies will be sleeping independently for hours at a time. Maybe even all night.

ScreamIfYouWantToGoFaster · 10/06/2012 01:28

Can someone please explain to me why I'm not asleep when Autumn is?!

Sod's law...

Fishcake thanks for that great article. Dream I'm still No Brooking for you and your gorgeous brood, I hope you all get a good night's sleep tonight. Musical Grin at the dropped food! Hawthers that's just a little bit too much reality for me on the sleeping front! You're a hero for getting through the broken nights for so long! I don't think I could still handle so little sleep by 6 months! No Brooking for you as well!

Is anyone else around? I've given up trying to make myself sleep and I'm now choosing a Father's Day gift for DH next Sunday (assuming I'm speaking to him by then! Silly man!) What do you think of this?

musicalmrs · 10/06/2012 01:32

Fell asleep with DD on me (oops) but other than that no sleep since earlier.. eek.

Fishcake, how exciting! Do you play then? :-) my tips would be as follows:

  • Find out when it was last tuned. Check it sounds reasonable (as in, as if if could be tuned properly!), and ask if it was last tuned to C. If it has been tuned down,.depends on how good your sense of pitch is as to whether it's a problem or not!
  • play a quick chromatic scale, and check all the keys and pedals work.
  • if poss have a quick play to check you like it!

Can't think of anything else at the moment. Sleep addled brain on strike..