July 2010: Their speech is improving but it's sleep we're still losing

[DesperateHousewife21]

Welcome back everyone!

that is super news tsc! so happy for little Mikey and all of you. what are the next milestones for him?

how's clara doing now?

memph has the pain and numbness you were getting stopped now?

really pleased your pain wasn't anything nasty chul. i guess it is just a bit of a complex thing with the old and new scar tissue so will take a while.

been a bit quiet this week as have just been floored with work and lack of sleep catching up on me from the last month of illnesses. no sign of it improving quite yet as we're starting to wean A from her 'morning feed' (which had actually become 2-3 feeds over the early hours ), just leaving her bedtime feed for now. she wasn't happy and we didn't much sleep but it's a start.

will be so weird having my body to myself again after nearly 4.5 years (by the time I completely stop bf)

did you carry on with the weaning tsc, if so, how's he taking it - and how're your boobs? part of the reason i decided not to go cold turkey was i didn't fancy the square boobs and hormone craziness that i get when i drop feeds.

anyway, hope you all have a lovely weekend. we're going probably going to a stately home which has a childrens steam train with friends tomo. otherwise quite chilled.

kk if its the end of his footballing I bet he will become team mascot cheering them on every weekend
kk he is feeling really low, he should be feeling more normal by now but he isnt, they have told him 3 months for chemo to leave his body and 9 months to get strength back, but the taste in his mouth should be gone now but its not.
tsc are any family allowed to visit him or is it just parents?
cakes my leg is still numb, struggling to sleep as I sleep on that side and it feels too weird to lie on it. But feel ok other than that.

We are going for a walk with dh's friends and their baby this afternoon, got kids party tomorrow then out in the evening then seaside with the inlaws (while hungover) on Sunday!
done the ironing and had FIL around already, he bought L chocolates of different descriptions for easter they clearly think im lying when I say he doesnt like chocolate

Memph he has his shit if he thinks my weekends will revolve around him standing on the side line!! Your poor dad really hope he starts to feel a bit better soon. The taste in his mouth must be awful
Going to get my spray tan done now in preparation for the weekend!! Said I'd treat myself cos I can't be arsed to do it myself. dp has got so much done today while I was working including washing loads of clothes! It's bloody brilliant! This week has definitely made him see and realise how much I have to do while trying to fit in work and Ellie too so I think he might help a bit more now

kk thats great that he is helping out a bit more! enjoy your spray tan!

we went for a walk to a pub today and it was freezing im still cold now! L was shattered, im dreading this party tomorrow morning, roll on lunchtime when it will all be over!

kk thats ace that he has realised what hard work things are. My DH is back here now, im so glad, i might get a few more hours sleep. Last night nearly killed me, up at 1.15 with F for over an hour, then with D at 4.15, just a dummy run really, then F again at 5. F has still got a cold and loads of mucus which lies heavy on his chest at night and i think thats why hes waking so much poor thing. I cant remember when D starten not feeding in the night, can anyone else, i cant remember if it was anything i did or wether it just happened? Stupid to forget when it wasnt that long ago.

Tsc- keeping my fingers crossed for your little nephew, can't imagine how your sis must feel.

vik L still feeds in the night apart from the odd one anything for an easy life

Soft play hell is over, there was a demon child, L cried and when DH got there she was near, then I saw her double hand smack him across the face, I saw red, jumoed in there with my bog boots on and shouted 'you do not smack..EVER!' then she ran off and his, then for the healthy 10 am meal of pizza and chips she was sat opposite L and L pointed at her saying NO BAD BOY! (he thinks everyone is a boy) then her fuck awful dad sat there bragging about how she can write the start of her name, turns out its because she plays a DS for a few HOURS a day, and xbox and playstation everyday too, all said very smug, and that she loves greggs pizza, she is 2.5! I hoiked my judgy pants so high I choked on them and walked off! The friends of mine whos party it was were they only normal people in there, never accepting an invite to one of those again!

W was about 9 months I think Vik. He did still sometimes feed in the night after that but hasn't done for ages now. I just held off for as long as possible and then he stopped asking, it was definitely habit more than need by 12 months, unless teething then it was a comfort.

How would playing on a DS or playstation help with writing skills? Genuinely

mlic I havent got a clue, he claimed she could write Madi but only did an M, he seemed proud as punch that she was a wizz on computers then said she can also go on the net on his phone, dh said she clearly hit L as she has no people skills, must be because she is always on a computer, he said she can play Nintendogs for 3 hours happily I just sat pretending not to listen while a load of others were all wow thats really good! idiots

Happy Easter everyone......if anyone is still there! Had a really nice family day today at mom and dads with my bro and his family but going to be very glad to get back to my house tomorrow with my things. Although........I fear I may feel very very lonely and miserable. I have loved being up here seeing friends and family and the boys have loved it too. I feel like I might want to move back to be close to everyone again but do not want to live in brum again as its generally a shit hole. DH is very unhappy right now and I'm worried about his state of mind, I think he is resenting the boys and really suffering from lack of sleep. We have had a few very unsettling conversations over the last day or so. I really want to help and support him but have no idea how?? I feel a bit vulnerable all of a sudden, very weird.

Hope you're all having a good Easter.

tsc how is your nephew doing?

Dh has taken Tuesday off too so he's got 5 days off. We went to the theatre Thu night - very good and great to get out together. Fri we took them to a big park/adventure playground nearby. Saturday dh took A to the cinema and food shopping so I got a few hours with just one. Sunday we went to a friends for Sunday/Easter lunch complete with egg hunt in the garden for the kids. Great weekend and good weather too.

X posted with you vik.

Tbh, having 2 very small dcs is hard, the lack of sleep makes it all seem harder...I don't know what your dh is unhappy about but our life has certainly got easier now the dcs are a bit older. I sort of feel like we are getting "us" back a bit and it's not just a treadmill of nappies, sleepless nights, not having enough money, cleaning up mess, etc etc etc.

vik could you move closer to your family without being in Brum? is it an option? I would find it so hard without family near, you could live near me!1 hour from Brum but a nice village
Must be hard for you, what sort of things has he being saying? has he not been better for you being away and having full nights sleep?

This weekend has been a washout, we are going to mums for tea tonight, dh is away tomorrow but coming home wednesday to see us, then away for rest of week, nice that he is thinking about us a bit more.

Went to pick up my ring this morning, now its been hidden, he told my bro last night that he wants us to get married in the uk :( oh well maybe a honeymoon in the sun instead?

Morning all! I've fallen behind a bit again on the thread... Mania is still continuing here, though on the whole things seem to be improving at least. :)

I've finally been offered a job! More money than what I'm on currently and sounds like it should be quite interesting. (Though it is the same company that rejected me for the same job a month ago. ) But at least I was able to hand in my notice at my current place of employment last week. Woo!

We also had a sudden house viewing last week, and they're coming back for a second viewing either today or tomorrow! Fingers crossed they make a reasonable offer. Apparently if they do, however, they'll want us out in about 6 weeks. So I may get to start a new job and arrange moving house at the same time, eek!

In less good news, I've been struck down with a delightful stomach bug. Probably the one that's been going around my work lately. Fortunately DH and M seem to have resisted it so far, though M did have a few dodgy nappies over the weekend. It's weird, normally I'm the one with stomach of steel-!

Anyway, going to go lie down again I think. Feel a bit shivery at the moment!

spirael well done on the job, and fingers crossed fr the house, is the house down the road that you wanted still available? hope you are feeling better soon.

L is going to my dads for theday today, I have nothing planned to do, he just wanted him for the day, so im at a loss, all my friends are back at work, so cleaning is all I have planned boring the sun is shining, but its still cold so dont think I want to brave the bike today!

memphis i see you didnt do the cleaning in the end and i dont blumin well blame you!! Coolio re the ring! How is your dad? We are back home now and i must say its nice to be in my own home, both boys have been lovely today and a lot more settled, D is really lovely and funny right now, he has a plastic dinosaur that he goes round roaring at everything with and if you ask him what his name is he says 'Hawwi' meaning Harry, wierd but funny.
spirael Hope your feeling better, great news about the job, did they come back to view the house?
wss you hit the nail on the head re my dh, he is finding things very difficult and he feels like he cant cope with all aspects of his life. The lack of sleep is making him really struggle through a day at work consequently he is eating shit food at work and drinking loads of energy drinks etc to keep going which is giving him a bad stomach. He even said he has thought about leaving, thats how bad he is feeling. He said hes depressed but he feels like his feelings are not valid because hes a man and men are just told to man up and not listened to or taken seriously. I was lost for words and very ashamed that i hadn't noticed how bad he was feeling, i had noticed he has been a right grumpy git but i just thought he was being grumpy. We have talked things through and there has been almost an immediate improvement in his mood. I just really hope i can help him through although im not altogether sure what to do. Strangly i feel all forward looking and hopefull, whats not to be happy about, two beautifull boys, a decent house, good friends and family and the summer to look forward to, i hope my optimism can rub off on him.

viksam I did the cleaning in the end, but saved a bit for tomorrow as looks like im stuck in all day. Hopefully now your dh has spoken about things it will feel better for him, just getting things off of your chest sometimes helps. dont feel bad that you didnt notice, you have a lot in your life too. L also says 'Hawwi' he walks my sisters dog and says come on Hawwi as he is so lazy!
L went to my dads today, im a bit annoyed tbh, I said I was in all day and if at any point he had to come home to do so (thinking that my dad may get tired) but I was expecting him home around 2, I text at 1 asking how he was and got told he was fine be back at 4, he comes home and is so ill he drops to his knees and lies on the drive sobbing, for 2 hours he lay on me, I think he has gone so long with a headache (he kept holding his head saying ow and ow everytime he walked) it had drained him, I was at home, he only went there to play with my half sis an bro, yet they didnt even give him calpol, step mum said he is ill isnt he...well he wasnt before he left, after half hour (after calpol) he looked up at me surprised I was there and said 'mummy?' this is a woman with young kids ffs.
On a different subject, homestart and the docs have been telling me to talk to Birth reflections to go over my birth to 'deal' with it for months finally did last week and had a phone consultation with woman she is a mw trained councellor, she is convinced I have post traumatic stress from it and is getting my notes sent to a meeting on the 1st, so hoping it will help sort out the few issues I still have with various things.

Hi all

Just a quick hello. Excuse typos, am on new to me iPad, cos my laptop packed in, less than a year old.

sorry for absence. Things are shitter than shit here. Am in and out of hospital cos this bleeding will not stop, has been going on for 6 weeks now, had another operation but still won't stop. I can't do anything, not allowed to lift even F, never mind M. DP has almost completely stopped working cos he has to look after kids and me, so our business is going down! We wil soon have to start finding jobs but there is nothing here. Our savings are going so we can't afford a house we would want in UK.

M has been so poorly. Could not get her fever to go down on sunday from 40.6. Not with nurofen or cal pol. Emergency doctor came and she might have pneumonia. Seems better now but now F seems to come down with it.

I honestly don't know how much more we can take. I have almost no reserves left and neither has DP.

So sorry for this enormous moan. Have notng else to say though.

It seems very quiet here. I hope you are all ok.

Oh my, Trudy :( So sorry things are tough there.

tsc how's mikey?

vik, don't beat yourself up. You did notice he wasn't himself. I'm glad you have seen a quick improvement in his mood from talking about it. Nice to read your positive vibes too :) I'm sure they will rub off on him.

memph it took me ages to work out wether it was your dad or L who was lying on the drive sobbing, worn out then! Is L better today? Good news on the therapy.

Spirael, congratulations on the new job! Let us know what happens with the house. Hope you're feeling better now and that M and your dh haven't come down with it.

cake, how are things with you? Any news on the interview your dh went to?

We had a lovely day yesterday. Not sure about today as it's pouring down and dh has some work to do (he's off this week but it has to be done, so it may as well be done when the weather's rubbish and we can't do much). Maybe softplay later. Tomorrow we're going to Beamish Great North Steam Fair.

Has anyone got goldfish? I'm thinking of getting a couple (W loves fish) but don't know whether they'll be more work than I think...any advice?

memphis why didnt they phone you? Do you think he was distressed there with them? Surley your dad didnt need a poorly toddler there either? People are amazingly stupid arnt they!
The birth counselling sounds positive, a good step forward, i hope it helps.
Shocking night here, D settled fine and slept untill 11.50 when he woke crying and continued to cry on and off untill about 2ish. DH was furious and clearly really cant cope with it, i had to stop him from going in because i was genuinly afraid of what he might do. He got up and went down stairs for half hour in the end. WHAT.THE.FUCK. is wrong with D??????????I just dont get it at all. I went to the docs yesterday for that full check up for him and hes fine. The doc said theres no help at all untill they are over two. So we are on our own and not coping and feeling at the end of our tether. My only solution is to sleep in his room with him, thats the only way he will settle right now. A night like last night is the LAST thing my dh needed.
chu hows things with you? is baby B settling in his moses now.
F is doing ok although the reflux is getting the better of him now and again, he slept through D's crying thank god.
mylife hows things with you?
cake what was the pox like, did they seem poorly or just spotty?

vik apparently he was fine until 1 but then just lay on them feebly saying 'mummy' my dad messaged today asking how we were and that his wife was worried sick all night, I told him it was shit then she text saying how awful she felt, if I had asked them to have him I wouldnt mind but they practically begged me to let him go there.
Go to see a different doctor and demand help, tell them its making family life hard and hopefully they will listen?
trudyla really hope things improve for you soon, do they know why you are still bleeding?
mlic we have goldfish, had 4, the 2 expensive ones died pretty quickly but the hook a duck fish from the fair are tougher than tough, we have a coldwater tank, not a filter one and clean it every 10 days or so, put fish in a jug, clean tank and wash stones, and about once a month I buy a weed from pets at home to oxygenate the water, ours are called Gary and Brian Geoffery and Frank died!

L was up a lot in the night, not screaming, its like he has no energy, his cheeks are bright red, the gums are so swollen so its defo teeth, he filled his nappy then came downstairs and in that time his nappy was actually yellow to look at, he filled his nappy in the night and I could smell it from his room eventhough the doors were closed

Had to get L milk so went to the shop and now he is asleep, DH is now mot away for rest of week to help me out more/be here with us, he genuinly seems to be caring more and making an effort!

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It seems to me that every time i post new post pop up and i look really really ignorent, i do refresh but even still it happenes.
So im sorry trudyla to not reply to you, sounds like HARD times with you there. Do u have any family there? I really hope F doesnt pick up what M had, how is M now? your bleeding sounds horrid, you must feel like shit. I hope things improve asap, please post if it makes u feel any better.
mylife how was the steam fair?
F was u at 5.40 this morning!! I tried to settle him with change of nappy and water but he wasnt having any of it, thats just too damn early man. D however only required two settlings and he went off straight away after each, result, just seems if one goes well the other goes faulty!! F's feeding is really shit right now though, hes really on and off his bottle, terrible hiccups and trapped wind and really bad possetting a while after his feed. Im at the docs in the morning so we'll se what they say. Hes already on gaviscon and i use infacol.
memphis hows L now?

mylife i have tropical fish, if it was my choice i wouldnt have any animals now, all that we had we had pre children and its just too much hassle really. Although D does love Tolly the dog and ripley the cat i will say that.