December 2011 - This too shall pass (with the help of imaginary woolly mammoths)

[Mmmmcheese]

Have gone with LMFs title suggestion :)

Watching last nights one born every minute it's making me really angry both of them (1 of whom is a midwife herself) are saying they don't want an epidural as its a failure, a cop out, they wont feel like they've really given birth etc glad she wasn't my midwife if that's how she feels about pain relief!!!

Quick Rant over.

Hi Kitty yeah sure I'll message you details when I'm back on the laptop later.

It'll be great to meet youKitty!
DH got his dates mixed up and arranged to be up In Scotland and away from home tonight inorder to get back early for Ali's jabs. Only the jabs are this afternoon. So if he's grumpy after, I'll be on my own to placate him.
So... I've got a pizza for dinner -throw in oven and eat with one hand food. And I suppose if he's really grizzly we can go to bed early and snuggle, he's often a lot quieter in our bed.
As well as the secret lurkers , after your autocorrect mopsy we'll have the FBI reading this thread! He he he!!
Must be off, there be exploding-pant type noises abound!

Kitty I'd love to. North or West Cornwall? I'm far West, less than 20 miles to Lands End >_< but we could meet half way if you're staying North. June should be lovely; we could have a beach meet up & make everyone jealous :)

Oh it was messy! Did I mention that we've not had our normal nappies these last two days? Tis diarrhoea. Not pleasant.

Having a bit of a dilemma, and wondering what you ladies think about this. I have been intending to contact my hospitals birth debrief service, however at my 6 week check my GP discouraged me from doing this and suggested that I should be happy to have a healthy baby and to forget about my labour. She suggested thinking carefully about my reasoning for wanting to talk through the notes before I contact them.

So i've thought about why I want to do it and so far have come up with:

1. My labour was a pretty difficult experience for both myself and DP ending with being rushed off for an emergency c section as DS was stuck and his heart rate was dropping, there had been lots of signs in the week running up to and during labour that suggested things weren't right but were brushed aside by midwifes and the consultants I saw.
2. My memories of labour are mostly a bit traumatic. I think seeing my notes and looking at the actual time scale things happened in might help me to see that things probably weren't as rushed and scary as I remember them being.
3. I'd like to see if they have any idea if the problems I had in labour are likely to occur with any future pregnancies. I already know that they would not induce me again due to the reactions I had to that but i'd like to know if they would recommend c section in the future.
4. Lastly I think i would be extremely anxious in the run up to labour if i didn't at least try and make some of these things clearer and that may affect my decision to have more children.

Sorry for long post, but I think writing it is already making it clearer to me that it's probably something that I need to do, but any advice would still be appreciated :)

but fwiw I think if you want a debrief you should get a debrief. As you say it may help you come to terms with your labour and answer questions now rather than stewing over it all until you next get pg and are then stressed about labour and hormonal to boot.

To be honest I think the gp was out of order to try to dissuade you. Just because your baby is ok doesn't mean that the process of arrival should be ignored.

BJR if you have questions I think you should go ahead with the debrief. Just because you're happy to have a healthy baby doesn't mean you can't still be upset/confused etc about the labour. I had no particular desire to have a 100% natural birth, but that doesn't mean I'm not still a little bit upset or let down about the way it went. Your gp was wrong to just dismiss your feelings like that.

Inlaws are still here! My FIL insists on calling him 'my baby', and getting annoyed when I take him upstairs to feed him. Gah! Go home!!

We're visiting Devon in March HLC to visit family, but it's a flying visit, owing to the distance, and, well, my family.

I must congratulate you on the best 'damn you, autocorrect' EVER mopsy, that's a classic!

I would go for it BJR, and I find it weird that your GP would try to dissuade you. The line about 'you've got a healthy baby, so get over it' (essentially) is frankly crap, as it totally ignores how the mother feels physically and mentally. Why this should be thought unimportant or secondary is beyond me, and seems to hint at a streak of misogyny.
You seem very clear that you want and need it so I would definitely go ahead.

I currently have a greased baby - baby oil for the dry skin on his head and eyebrows, and a wee bit behind his ears

SE/Bluewater potential meet up- Sequin, BJR, MissRee so far, but I'm sure there are others in the area.

BJR I know I can't start to deal with what happened until I can understand it: I've got a copy of my notes from the hospital because it did seem to happen too quickly and my poor brain didn't understand (G&A may have been a factor). It was err... tough/emotional/upsetting to read them and remember how traumatic it was at the time but I still needed to do it. (I'm considering going to the debrief service to challenge some of the things they wrote.)

If you are like me then it will help and don't let the GP dissuade you.

BJR, the debriefs are offered for a reason... Because they help. Go for it.

Flying visit, DS is ratty. Again!!

Put me down for a Bluewater meet up!

BJR, I'd speak to them. MW put me off talking to a counsellor post birth (v.traumatic, similar to yours but without the c.section) & I'm still feeling angry n awful about it all.

Just a quick post, grizzly baby here so about to do bedtime a bit early.

BJR as others have said I'd go for it, wrong of GP to put you off.

I had her measured earlier and she's on the 98th centile for length! That'll be why the 3-6 month(!) cardigans are getting short, maybe she'll be a supermodel?!

MsB and sequin it is very sad but incredibly exciting . OK, so there?s now just a hole in the wall, but also lots of shiny new pipes gone in today and loads of new radiators stacked up and ready to be installed, which will double the current output!

Thanks for the coffee Northern, much appreciated

I don?t suppose anyone?s in the Northampton / Milton Keynes area? Jealous of the NW and SE meet-ups! I will be in the NW next month though, visiting DH family and friends (Ramsbottom to be precise)

mopsy you will have nursery guilt but rest assured they soon settle and benefit from going, You?re right about more sickness though

DS is another big ?un in 3-6 month clothes already. He?s so chunky now he has a double chin, thighs like a rugby player and even has chubby feet!

Random question, and not really one for this thread I know, but at what age should you start taking kids to the optician? DD almost 22 months, she keeps saying she has an ouch in her eye, and I noticed it kept wandering in towards her nose this afternoon IYSWIM?

Used the sling today. Not too bad, but he's been hell on legs tonight as he seems to thing being held is the new thing. Balls.

Kate you can ask for a referral to the paediatric optician, just poke your health visitor. Normal eye tests start at about 5, my daughter started going at 4 as she also complained.

Northern thanks for the coffee:)

Sorry have been a tad quiet recently. Combination of posting on my phone (too tired to get the laptop out most nights) and going to bed when the kids do is making me dull >_<

Octopus is in the small camp still. Six weeks old and still in his newborn babygros:)

Glad people enjoyed them- 'twas the Rainforest Alliance blend, a personal favourite.

We've got DS in his 3-6s now, and he fits it well; he does a remarkable impression of Eric Pickles, sadly, given the chins and chops.

He has slept for precisely 45 sodding minutes today, and that's only because I shoved him in the sling to go and post a letter, then went and pruned the roses. I've tried putting him down five times; three he woke in seconds himself, once the phone went, and once OH came barging in and woke him and faced my wrath.

Why won't he bloody sleep, aaaargh?! OH is currently regaling him with a personalised version of 'one man went to mow', and like yours LMF is demanding to be held, jiggled or fed. Double balls.

Sequin, BJR, MissRee, AWCH so far...

Thanks LMF I'll do that. See how great this thread is? Even the most random questions are swiftly given helpful answers

Kate I'll be back in Northants from Easter. Kettering to be precise. Wherabouts are you?

Jesus, it must look like I'm some kind of weird cyber stalker, desperate to meet you all Wonder if I can get myself to bluewater to gatecrash that too....

Bought a baby carrier earlier. Am now impatiently waiting for him to stop eating so I can try using it.

BJR ignore your GP. If you're going to worry you need to work through it so you're calm for next time. I had a reasonably straight forward delivery, but it all went a bit mad at the end with a room full of people and a lot (apparently!) of blood lost. I've had to get DH to explain what he remembers as I was a bit self absorbed for those last 20 mins and hadn't even realised that he didn;t actually cut the cord until about a week later. Note to self, get drugs next time

Honey nothing booked yet. We're not at all picky, just need a self catering property with 3 bedrooms pref all with double beds, space for 2 cots, parking for 2 or 3 cars and pref a Sat changeover. Oh, with nice decor but still cheap enough that we (me, dh, db, dsil and dm) can afford to go. Oh, and DH and DB have requested somewhere within walking distance of a pub!! There are a LOT of emails flying back and forth this week!

Northern You'd like a friend if mine. He has a pro gaggia style coffee widget in his kitchen. Properly plumbed in to the mains and everything. Gets his coffee from an indie coffee supplier:o

Kate Font forget the hot and cold running pompoms/haddock

LMF mine is 8.5 weeks and still in newborn stuff! Hoping she will fit the 0-3 stuff soon as ben given some really cute bits!

Minimopsy crying since 6. She always cries on and off from 6-9ish but particularly bad this evening. No idea why! She's fed, warm etc. Husband came in to lovely quiet house and her seemingly fast asleep (I'd just put her down two mins earlier) but she almost immediately kicked off so we've had to eat separately etc so barely seen each other. Knackered so off to bed now, maybe my presence will help calm her - hope it does so I can catch some zzzzs!!! At least is nearly the weekend! I did a 6 mile walk today so I'm so tired, hope it means I sleep through her grunts/squeaks etc!!

Been meaning to ask, what/where is bluewater? Is it a shopping centre?

Kate let us know when you visit Ramsbottom and we'll schedule another meet up.
kitty I am the same, I want to meet everyone. We should hire a hotel or big house somewhere central. The first night we should all meet with DPs and babies, and on the second night we should leave DPs holding the babies and all get drunk together and dance on some tables. Those without DPs we can organise babysitting with our DPs.

mopsy bluewater is hell on earth a shopping centre in Kent. Like meadow hell hall or the metro centre:)

Have you considered the idea that minimopsy might have colic? If she's crying at set times each day for no discernible reason it might be a possibility:(

I dont drive. I very much doubt it but is anyone else in the middle of sodding nowhere far East Suffolk?

I have my post natal check tomorrow can you ladies please enlighten me as to what to expect thanks.