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Original poster

The CRESH spa and creche: we ALL deserve crap ham

1000 replies

FannyPriceless · 26/05/2011 12:18

Enter all ye ESHes. We've been Barren, we've been Pregnant - now at last we are Child-Rearing.

  • Come share your questionable tips on raising a real live baybee!
  • Compete with Cunty to take control of the bad mummy crown!
  • Eat crap ham - after all, you deserve it!
OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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rocketleaf · 29/06/2011 17:36

That's crap about the washer. :( Lucky for me washing machine is still in warranty. It's already had a new motherboard and door lock. Neither of which fixed the problem. I wish I'd asked to keep the old parts now as they were obviously fine.

CluckyKate · 29/06/2011 17:43

Get a Miele - plenty of wonga but built to last 20 years!

Novice working hunter Silv and yes, you're right with the ginger guess Rockers

SilverSky · 29/06/2011 17:45

Oooh! Which show?

Who was it that said recently (someone famous and ginger) that calling someone ginger is basically the same as racism. Might have been Mick Hucknall. Might not.

AlpinePony · 29/06/2011 18:38

silv It was indeed the Hucknall - and strangely enough he used exactly the quote I saw on mn 2 days previous... imagine that!? MH spends his days pretending to be a mummy and reading mn. Am I the only one who got "Stars" for my 18th or were you all too cool?

Good job I didn't arrange to meet Kate/box sunday night after leaving reggie... am actually v surprised poor box is still in and waiting, I always thought they fixed breaks asap - i.e., same day, but I seem to remember poor MrsFC's husband spend days and days waiting when he did his.

Cossie That's utter bollocks! :( We are currently without a tumble-dryer, but that can wait until autumn, a dishwasher can't wait.

Happy Birthday to Rastus
Happy Birthday to Rastusssssssssssssss
Happy Birthday to Rastus
Squashed tomatoes and stewwwwwwwwwwwwwww

SilverSky · 29/06/2011 19:02

I went to a NYE party with MH. Weeeellllll not with him as his personal guest but he was there. Same fing innit? He was adorned by two skinny models who either ate toilet roll for a living or had speed on tap they were that thin. MH was not looking too hot either. Of course, I was radiant and gorgeous. Grin

Poor box. What a complete pain to still not be home. Hope she is ok. Hope small horse has been grounded for bad behaviour.

I raise your broken washing machines, dishwasher, tumbles with being reduced to a one car family. That's what you call a proper PITA. In so many ways.

Oh and did I mention I'm out on the razz Friday night. The girls are painting the town red. Hopefully I won't be asleep by 11 or painting the town with vom due to lack of alcopops training. Grin

SilverSky · 29/06/2011 19:21

Anyone got any remedies for dribble rash? It's driving MB mad and is obv itching.

rocketleaf · 29/06/2011 20:24

Ugh, I can not stand Muck Hicknall. Not sure why he annoys me so much but he's up there with Bono, Mariah and Celine. He brings gingers into disrepute with his ridiculous comments. Actually had the same argument from a ginger friend not long ago and I made the point that you can't compare a few playground jibes with hundreds of years of persecution and segregation

We have always been a 1 car family silva but we make up for it with a surplus of bikes. TB has decided he is going to cycle to work now which involves a different one to the one he rides up abd down hills about twice a year Hmm

SilverSky · 29/06/2011 21:06

rock&roll HI has an all singing all dancing mountIn bike that cost £350. Least that's what he told me. About a year or so later HI came clean and told me it cost twice that!!! So not impressed with being fibbed to.

He also rarely rides it. Tho I want to get a kiddie seat on the back of mine.

SilverSky · 29/06/2011 21:06

*mountain

Original poster
FannyPriceless · 29/06/2011 21:22

I am delirious with relief. It was the worst interview I have done in my entire life, lasted 2 hours, and all I can feel is - thank fuck that is over! I blagged loads of completely incoherent shit, so if that's what the're looking for, I'm in!Hmm

alps Stars for your 18th? God, I am way older than you. Though I did buy tickets to see the Huck for my friend's 24th birfday. We went along and felt two things: (1) the Huck is repulsively ugly, in a way that makes you think that every time you've seen him on telly he must have been airbrushed and beautified, (2) he someone draws you into his weird sexual magnetism with his ridiculous confidence that makes you hate yourself for falling for it. How??!! He is hideous!

OP posts:
rocketleaf · 29/06/2011 21:23

TBs new bike cost £500 second hand. Hmm Apparently bikes are the new thing blokes spend a midlife crisis on instead if a stupid sports car. But IMO TB is too young for a mid life so not sure what his excuse is.

I'd like a child seat on mine too but as I am not the best cyclinst I'd be worried about killing us both! (not really)

rocketleaf · 29/06/2011 21:25

Fanny, if it was hideous it would have lasted 20 minutes not 2 hrs. I'd say you have it in the bag.

SilverSky · 29/06/2011 21:40

I've blagged and waffled my way through many an interview so you are in good company there fanjo!

I also think Huck is minging and I have NEVER found him attractive. He is positively vile.

HI is also too young for midlife crisis. His current obsession is getting A bigger tv. The one we have already is big enough. He keeps testing the water claiming that whilst I've been away he has replaced the tv to gauge my reaction. Lets just say that we won't be upgrading anytime soon. Wink

Backinthebox · 29/06/2011 22:03

Good evening! I am here. I have been screwed 4 times today, and that's all I'm saying. Can't type more as I may be sick. It's the heroine they've given me, ya know!

Backinthebox · 29/06/2011 22:05

Ps can type just enough to stick up for fingers though. Cos we are rock hard! Not Mick Hucknall though.

Backinthebox · 29/06/2011 22:06

Gingers. Wtf is this fingers Shiz about?

Original poster
FannyPriceless · 29/06/2011 22:11

boxy Still recovering, are we?Wink Can't really make sense of your posts but hope you are soon feeling better.

OP posts:
Original poster
FannyPriceless · 29/06/2011 22:12

Oh gingers!

OP posts:
SilverSky · 29/06/2011 22:13

Bet you're knackered after all that screwing!

rocketleaf · 29/06/2011 22:18

box auto correct kept offering me fingers instead of gingers but not being on the smack I managed to kick it into touch. Enjoy the rrrrrugs. :o

silvs HI and TB sound like peas in a pod. Our flat screen was purchased on Xmas day avfew years ago as there was £50 off. He is already talking about upgrading. I suspect he will encourage sprout to wreck it as soon as she is remotely mobile just so he can buy a new one.

SilverSky · 29/06/2011 22:25

Better make sure they never meet. As they will plot against us fo' sho'!

Did I mention that years ago when we lived in my house I came home from work to find he had sold MY tv for £50 (it had cost me £350!) and replaced it with a flat screen. Cos obviously we NEEDED a new tv.

CluckyKate · 29/06/2011 22:28

Them's good drucks eh Box Grin

rocketleaf · 29/06/2011 22:35

Whereas TB sold the wii I bought him for Xmas including the wii fit I bought myself and some games I hadn't finished in order to buy a PS3. I agree they should never meet. :o

SilverSky · 29/06/2011 22:36

GrinGrin Ain't that the truth cluck! GrinGrin

SilverSky · 29/06/2011 22:40

Shifty buggers! The pair of them getyarocksoff!

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