Dec 08 - tears, tantrums, giggles and piddles - and that's just the mums!

[traceface]

Or maybe piddling whilst giggling is just me?
It's so sunny here I feel Spring has sprung - where's that daffodil emoticon gone? Had a friend round this morning for a natter and cake - muchos snot and tears but all good. Think I might go for a little bike ride now to blow the cobwebs away.
And no vag - not a chance!
rubs don't you dare spend all your time tweeting - your first loyalty is here!

DD2 loves Ella's Kitchen much more than my homecooked food! Feel a bit of a useless mother as I rarely cook for her. It's expensive too. Although she and DD1 both love pasta with cheese sauce or mince!

Cripes, we're going to need a new thread before too long. Natter-tastic!

Rubes, she has an Ella's Kitchen or Plum Baby or some such about 7.45, milk about 8.15. Then bed. But it doesn't matter what time your DD has it really, I just meant, if she is turning her nose up at milk for her last feed, why not try a few spoons of solid instead? Another thing DD2 likes is Banana Custard, which is in a jar, horror of horrors No wonder she is 95th centile. I have been crap at making my own food this time. I did it a bit last time.

Good to see you, SL! With you on slagging off other people's weddings (at the wedding itself) - v bad form. I didn't start my food diary, but I must, just in case I am consuming things I don't really notice. Though if I snack I tend to have cucumber, carrots, celery, maybe an apple...

Trudy, I read that book whilst on hols a couple of months ago. I didn't like the first chapter but thereafter I thoroughly enjoyed it. Depends what you like but it's a real comfort read.

Funnily enough, Beans, I bought The Suspicions of Mr Whicher for DP over two years ago, thinking it was right up his street. He read about one page every month for months on end, as he said it was horrendously slow...and never finished it. However, we both watched the tv adaptation of it that was on over Easter!

Oh yes, and Trudy - I am sure the doctor didn't think you were a basket case - she just sounds like a good doctor, attuned to her patients! Oddly enough I read about Mindfulness only about two weeks ago. It seems like a very interesting technique for sort of soothing and resting the mind, and stopping it racing down the same old negative routes.

Must get back to my stuff.

Lady: did I say she didn't want last milk feed? if so, I didn't mean that. Oh last night she woke at 1030 (normally its 1130) for her milk but she still had 5 oz but left the last couple that's all. Here's a typical day she eats:
(at the mo all bought food since I cooked a shed load and she spat it out)

first thing- 6-7 oz milk (never finishes it)
around 8am a tub of organix banana porridge or Ella's kitchen baby brekky etc
about 10am 6-7 oz milk (sometimes finishes)
12noon ish Pouch of Ella's kitchen or similar
around 2pm 6-7 oz milk (has just left 2 oz of this)
6pm-ish Tub or Pouch of Ella or similar sometimes a yogurt too (little pot)
7-730 6-7 oz milk (sometimes finishes but often leaves an oz or so)
1130pm as above with milk

and usually around 3 am - about 6oz milk super fast like she's been starved by day.
I must admit though, she has only recently started eating full pouches at meals which is why I thought I knew why she was waking at night. it has also been difficult to get her morning bottle down her until recently, but now she take it and STILL isn't sleeping through. Do you think maybe it will take a good few days of getting this amount into her by day before it takes effect?

Lady I think you've summed up Mindfulness perfectly. As I understand it it's about accepting where you are and as you say, giving yourself some mental calm, rather than constantly analysing why you're where you are, and I'm a terrible one for analysing.

Beans ICTC is Dodie Smith, the same woman who wrote 101 Dalmations. Irish Murdoch I just cannot do. Thanks for the tip re the first chapter Lady, I'll trug on through that. Haven't started the book yet. I read Mr Whicher too and thought it was one of the most turgid things I'd ever read, so I got as far as finding out whodunnit then gratefully closed the book.

Must go, 10 mins to get DS ready to go and collect DD from school. Am I mad leaving two cakes in the oven on v low heat while I go out??

It was me who was thinking ictc was Iris Murdoch, d'oh. Don't know why, must be another book by her I get it confused with. Every time I talk about which author writes which thing on here when I am not totally sure I get it wrong! Dozy.

rubes I think maybe they sleep through when they are ready, I reckon if they are waking and only taking a bit or waking and not able to resettle themselves, that is when controlled crying or resettling without milk somehow comes in handy but otherwise I'm not convinced that it's worth doing much apart from sitting it out. Though that could just be me being lazy.

My DD eats so much, so different from DS and still isn't sleeping through! She is slightly more spherical than the slender mini Rubes though. She does seem hungry as well and if we do the last feed later then she wakes correspondingly later too so that would imply it is hunger? E.g. after wedding she hadn't woken for last feed so got it at 12 and slept through until 6am, normally she wakes at 4 after milk at 10-1030. Though I suppose it could be sleep cycles that mean she comes into light sleep after 6 hrs?
Anyway waffling on here.

Howdy. Just quick one from me. Am on way back to work from booking visit and I felt like such an old stager. Midwife was same one I had when I was pg with dd which was lovely but from sound of it they have reorganised things and I won't necessarily get same person again. In as I have put on 5kg. Ha ha ha. And it's only 11 weeks. Turns out running was really making a difference. Really doesn't occur to me to keep any kind of a handle on eating as last time it was all about trying to eat as much as possible. Does explain why my trousers are a bit tight . have to go back to work now. Dullsville.

I had loads I wanted to post on (not least arti your working mum thing - brillaint explanation of what you do). Will do later.

Hi Urbs glad all is well!
Just a quicky as ds having a meltdown ever since I made him get out of the DRIVERS seat of the car

back from Health Visitor and Nursery - v helpful will be back with what she said

Rubes - similar eating to my DD2 - here is our list for comparison...

7.30 - 7oz milk - only ever has max of 6 and put rest on...
8am - weetabix with left over formula. OR recently a few cheerios with cow's milk, then half a piece of toast with butter and thin marmite
11am - two little rice cakes
12pm - Ella's pouch or Plum thing (stage 2 and occasionally stage 3, but only Ella's!!), then a yoghurt or a sweet pouch
2.30-3pm - 5oz milk
5.15 - same as lunch or something homemade if I've bothered (homemade spag bol tonight - v proud!)
6.30 - 6oz milk, which she doesn't usually finish. Normally about 4oz. Then bed at 6.45 and nothing til morning.

Feel a bit mean on the milk front!!!

Glad everyone else thought Mr Whicher turgid. Struggling big style. 74 pages to go....

On the whole eating/sleeping thing - T has always been stuffed to the gills in the hop he'll sleep well. He still doesn't reliably sleep through. B, meanwhile, despite his reflux and often barely consuming any calories in a day, is a great sleeper at night and has slept through for about 8 weeks now. He's a crap napper in the day, mind you, but still, there does seem to be some neurological element to it.
Obviously, if they're hungry they'll wake, but if they've eaten well and still wake and want milk, it may be part of something else going on.
I still can't believe when people ask how tired I'm feeling and smile sympathetically looking at B, I'm actually pointing to T and his nightmares/earaches/teething etc etc as the cause of the broken nights.

Ok sort of got a minute.
Went to the weekly HV weigh in (where I last went 7 months ago ) DD is 8 kg / 17lbs and 35th centile roughly which is fine and actually gone up since her birth. No issues there (except ds face down in the hall refusing to move therefore receptionist had to watch him )
She said could be a couple of things re the sleeping. Asked what she ate in a day so told her what she was like up until a week ago (not much by day)and how she is now (much much more) and she said the waking may well be just habit and with her daytime intake she DEF doesn't need any feeds after her dinner time solids and milk.
She also said that maybe, and although I never feed her in the cot, maybe her milk is too close to going down for naps / bedtime and therefore she won't settle unless she has a full tummy, and try and pull dinner forward so she has half an hour at least after any milk before bed. (I / and she tended to not think it's this though and more just habit from when she actually was hungry - everyone here seems to put them to bed pretty soon after last milk and I did with ds so I think it's more the habit thing since she actually WAS hungry back a couple of weeks ago when she just barely nibbled in the day. She never said anything is set in stone and just said it's a couple of things to try / or consider. To break the habit she just suggested quiet shushing or patting or even water which I told her I did but I think I just have to risk ds waking
Anyway, secured him a place in Nursery for the Early Years thingimy. He's going 2 x school length days a week from Jan 1st and they will also give him lunch and all snacks etc with a top up fee of 5.86 for one hour that I'm short. I didn't think I would manage getting him there 5 mornings a week as the mornings are only 3 hour sessions and I'm flat out getting out to toddler group only twice a week in time before its almost over! He's also going to do a half day from mid Sept, but I was kind of wrong on the price. Their half days are actually 5 hours so it's about £30 for that but I figure he'll really benefit as I could hardly get him to leave the place today.
Right must go get these kidlets in bed and sort dinner. I'm knackered - dh not long home. Gosh I've been doing solo dinner / bath / bedtime for ages now - so knackering. To be fair dh usually gets here in time to get ds out of the bath and does story, but I find myself pouring wine earlier and earlier these days!
Sorry for the self absorbed post - just wanted to get that posted - any feedback on those HV comments welcomed. Oh and haven't read back so no doubt it's not even half making sense!

Hello all have been lurking this afternoon but in a grumpy mood so haven't posted. This ankle is really starting to annoy me. It's sounds sad but I was really enjoying my training and gym time. It was nice to do something completely by myself. Also before these two monkeys came along my fitness was always something I was proud of and which kind of defined me a little. That & my work. I can't do the work thing here so getting back to some level of fitness was something I really wanted to do and I was just starting to feel like I was on my way back there. I'm desperate to do something now but I'm worried about how long I should stay off my ankle and also trying to just be a mum when my ankle is up to pot is a nightmare. I lost it with DH today because I wanted to go to the doctor to get it checked out (I'm now worried about a fracture after Arti's post) but the earliest appointment is Thursday and DH is away for a conference and with the boys its just too difficult to sort trying to get there. It feels like if I need to do something the logistics that need to be sorted is always a mountain. I was actually going to try to get the ankle xrayed earlier in the year, as it was slow to heal after the September sprain, but with moving and DH away on a couple of UK trips it kind of just slipped by. I just wish u could just get up & leave the house whenever I want to, instead it always needs to be planned with military precision. Do you know what I mean?

Anyway I've tried to be proactive this afternoon & I've looked up some sites on ankle rehab for after all the swelling has settled down. Ive also been thinking I might take DHs MTB out to try some off road cycling around the sand dunes area that would have to be good for me. I'm terrible at down hill but I always used to like simple off road stuff. I still love the road cycling but the off road would be more challenging.

hi everyone
vag I know exactly what you mean about not being able to just nip out. I need to take L's shoes back because they're rubbing her feet, but it means taking both girls after school tomorrow, and P would just want to run wild, and just the thought of it is enough to put me off. How do SAHMs get anything done? I'm always trying to sneak jobs in quickly when I only have one child with me, or none, and am in awe of those who do everything with all their offspring in tow! Re the ankle - I think the xray sounds like a good plan. Is there anyone who could mind the boys for an hour while you went? Or a trip to A+E before dh goes away?
nudytrudy sorry you're not feeling great about things, but good on you for addressing it. Really glad you've got a good GP and I hope the mindfulness thing is helpful. I've never heard of it, but from what you and LadyT say it sounds like it can only be a good thing.
DB I've looked at your other thread. Hmm. I think your response is entirely reasonable. I would not feel happy with what was happening and I think it's fab that you've spoken to SIL about it, rather than let it eat away at you. Keeping them in view when playing sounds like a good plan to me. How are you in yourself at the moment? You were feeling rather flat not so long ago. Obviously recent injuries and events can't have helped...
Sorry to hear of the non-sleeping LOs. Rubs that's so tough but sounds like the HV was helpful. P has decided to scream and shout at bedtimes and whenever she wakes in the night, including almost solidly from 11pm till 2am last night . I hate it. I am so weak and hate to hear her yelling for me, but I know that every time I go to her to soothe her, it's just reinforcing that she can yell for my attention 24/7!
Well I did day 1 of the 30 day shred this morning . By Gum it's hard work! I only did level one and I was so shaky legged afterwards and absolutely worn out! I think it'll hurt to move tomorrow - and I have to do it all again! But if I want to lose my wobble...
Anyway, sorry not to do more personals right now - have a huge mountain of ironing which I must tackle. Oh what fun.
Where is WG? hope all is ok.
xxx
Oh and Beans you are SO funny doing a sneaky poo! I'm loving all these poo stories

Thanks trace. Have just been reading up on Mindfulness and am reassured to read that it's not just for people with really bad problems but something lots of people would benefit from. Honestly no-one will know me if I transform into a deep-breathing calm and wafty yoga addict!

Am very excitedly waiting for DH to get back with ginger ale as my friend has just given me a whopping bottle of Pimms She deposits her child at our house every Tues to play with mine, and I feed them both and take them to Brownies and for this onerous duty I am richly rewarded - she even drops DD home afterwards so I'm only doing what I'd do for DD anyway but for +1, which is nothing. Anyway, I'm not complaining!

I know what you all mean about not being able to nip out. One perk of our step set-up is that there's frequently someone about to mind M, but on other days, like today, I just gave myself up to running a few errands and buying a bit of food taking up the entire morning, which it did. I'd have been a frazzled old hag if I'd been trying to squeeze it into an hour after school, but letting it take about 2 1/2 hours and letting M walk from car park to library etc and taking our time and chatting as we went made it quite a nice morning. Can you see the new me shining out already?? I feel awkward on the odd occasion that I have to ask DH to mind M when he's meant to be working as he already spends half the day running around after the skids (driving tests on the horizon though so this should pass soon) and our company desperately needs his attention, but there's no help for it tomorrow when I have to go back for my blood tests. He's fine about but has taken to making lots of 'mad wife' jokes, hardy ha ha. He is actually really good about anything and everything, I'm not putting him in a good light here. I think it probably says a lot about my state of mind atm that when the doc booked me in for tomorrow morning my immediate thought was "oh god, I'll have to ask K to look after M for me, and then he won't be able to work, and then the company will collapse" - pass the Mogadon...

vag I am so with you on the getting out of the house thing, grrr, so annoying! trace I find it impossible to get stuff done a lot of the time with 2 of them around. I can for a small amount of time but then DS gets annoyed at getting no attention and starts making mess as fast as I am doing stuff!

vag sorry about the ankle, I am not surprised you are fed up. Me too on the being fit and it sort of defining me a bit before having kids. Though I basically get around this issue by thinking I am still fit , I am not. You should def do some mtbing, it is good for the soul.

trace 30 day shred sounds good. Maybe I will purchase so I can ignore it like my turbotraining videos
db I forgot to say sorry about your awful accident too, how are you now? Are you better apart from the face injury (DV, etc)

rubes interested about HV, let me know how you get on with it. DD eats loads, today she has had

brekkie, ready brek and fruit (not that much maybe 10 spoonfuls)
lunch half an avocado, a load of tomato and tuna pasta, a bit of summer fruit mix
Dinner, loads of risotto, summer fruits again and a biggish yoghurt.

1 breastfeed first in the morning, 2 during the day , and only 3 of the 7oz of milk before bed (unsurprising given monster tea). She will probably have close to 7oz at 10pm though.

She likes Ellas kitchen fruit, but won't touch any premade savoury baby food that I've found yet, which is annoying. But can't complain as DS was the other way round and that pissed me off much more.

So she should def be sleeping through I think. hmmmm....maybe I should be doing something about it....Maybe I will take her to clinic as well this week while parents here (never normally get her weighed as it at ds sleep time) and see what they say.

Oh Vag feel for you. It's hard to make all that progress then wonder how many days might slip by with none. I think you'll be back in fine form in no time. Can you do lots of swimming to make up for it? I wish you lived here. I'd mind the kids and you could head in for an Xray.

Just popping out. I DEF know what you mean. I often have to (ie today) and there are times when it sounds like such an ordeal and I hang on every minute that dh says he might be home early to see if I can go the min he walk in, but it's rarely the case. Like just taking the dog HALF a mile to the kennel the other day I had to pile both kids in the car. And now all ds wants to do is sit in the drivers seat and refuses to move. takes me ages and I find myself bribing him with flapjacks (loves them) it's such an ordeal sometimes.

Loving the sound of that Pimms Rudy

Spot crossed with you earlier. Didn't know ds2 slept so well now, that's brilliant!

Right they are both well and truly asleep and I have done Jack about dinner - so better go as dh is working (at home) again - presentation tomorrow

Oh and one other thing, then I promise I'll leave you all in peace Trace you always seem to be doing a mountain of ironing? I never iron a thing (unless a special occasion or dh interview and then sometimes he does it as he's quite good at it) and dh wears a shirt at work nearly every day (thank you M&S non-iron shirts) is it work uniforms or something or what? is there any way you can cut that right out or at least the pile down? I'm just intrigued, and at the same time feel a bit of a crap wife!

Right salmon ready (in the oven lady not microwave )

ha ha rubs that's funny that you've picked up on my ironing! I don't actually do loads, never do towels or bedding or undies or P's clothes, but I do do most of L's clothes and uniforms, and my stuff and DH's stuff. I guess the mountain isn't that huge - only really an hour a couple of times a week, I just moan about it a lot! But actually if I watch telly while I do it, then I don't really mind it at all
We need a new thread ladies...any suggestions? I feel it needs to include clandestine poos!

Oh bumholes, just lost a massive post. Might have to redo it tomorrow now!

Hi all, what a quiet weekend and then a crazy couple of days on this thread. So so funny to read all the poo stories, and Beans, I am sorry for your poor Mum's broken leg but I was actually sobbing when I read that, completely helpless with laughter. DD couldn't work out what on earth was going on and kept asking 'why Mummy sad? Mummy crying? Weezy give Mummy big hug' and I couldn't talk to even try to explain that I was happy. Bless her

The laptop appears to have broken, which is v annoying, so catching up on my phone, so it will be in bits and pieces and will take a while.

Northern ladies - that includes you Deids, we are talking about a meet up in the North West this time. Trace and Jolly (hope your tum is better now?) I've emailed you and Deids I don't think I have your email address so have fb you mine. Hope to see you soon! If anyone else is likely to be in the North anytime soon, do come to see us

Summer I read your message to DB as "sorry about your awful accent"

Rubena I have trouble extracting DS from the car too sometimes - fine if he wants to stay in it strapped into his seat but less amusing when he's welded himself to the driver's seat and is being a bit too enthusiastic twisting stalks.

I quite like ironing but then I've always loved doing laundry, which is just as well with six people in the house. Don't ask me to mop a floor though or, god forbid, dust.

This evening is looking up hugely. Apart from the vast Pimms & ginger ale at my elbow, I had a call earlier from an old uni friend who lives in Australia but who's over here for three months, and we've hatched plans to meet sans kids, yippee! She's in North Shields, I'm in Herefordshire and we'll both be on the train. We assumed Manchester was as good a place as any but does anyone have a better idea for a sensible, public transport-friendly place? Neither of us has ever been to Manchester so we'll be the blind leading the blind.

Manchester does seem the obvious choice Rudy, I'm sorry I've only stayed in Manchester city center once & been to the airport a couple of times. I can recommend the Manchester Airport viewing platform for all your plane spotting needs, but that's about it.

Thanks for your thoughts on my wobble lovely ladies, what would I do without you.

Hah! Rubes I have successfully jinxed myself - B has been awake for over an hour now and no signs of going to sleep. He never does this! Could it be a reaction to the jabs he had yesterday?

Rubes and jam this is the book I was talking about that my friend sent me in PDF. V v funny (also for everyone else!)
Dd woke at 9 and drank the rest of her milk but has refused normal before bed feed. Think am going to try and cuddlle back to sleep in the night and see what happens.
I asked my mum if she had read mr whicher(sp) and she has and agrees it is awful. I get most of my reading recommendations from my mum these days!

woah how right I was about jinxing myself. T was up until 2, at which point B took over and woke every 45 mins. Cock knows what it's all about but right now I want to murder someone. He had painkillers (is teething) and milk, but no go. Had forgotten what the zero sleep is like and I'm not a very nice person on it.

Summer that book looks hilarious! Isn't it funny how none of us enjoyed Mr Whicher and yet it won awards and so on? My mother passes me lots of books too, but as yet Go the F*ck to Sleep hasn't come my way

Hope things quietened down Spot. M did really well, sleeping through til 5.30 then being persuaded to go back to sleep for nearly an hour, but DD had really bad tummy ache from 4.30. I always get panicky about appendicitis as lots of people have had it in DH's family and mine, but it's easing. No school today though, ho hum.