Dec 08 - tears, tantrums, giggles and piddles - and that's just the mums!

[traceface]

Or maybe piddling whilst giggling is just me?
It's so sunny here I feel Spring has sprung - where's that daffodil emoticon gone? Had a friend round this morning for a natter and cake - muchos snot and tears but all good. Think I might go for a little bike ride now to blow the cobwebs away.
And no vag - not a chance!
rubs don't you dare spend all your time tweeting - your first loyalty is here!

Trace just quickly as I'm trying to settle the boys to sleep in a slightly freezing tent. But Trace, I really related to what you said about the settling to bed thing. DS2 settles with me but if he hurts himself or falls over he always wants DH to cuddle him to make him feel better. It's fine if DH is working from home when he hurts himself but if not he will cry out for DH even while I am cuddling and trying to soothe him. It' silly but I feel really inadequate as a mother because I think little kids should want their mum to help them feel better. I wander why he doesn't find me enough to reassure and soothe him.

Very quick post as on phone. Veg DD1 cries for her toy rabbit if hurt. Not sure what that says about me! Have a foul tummy bug. Does it effect bf? Dd2 hasn't left me alone all day. absolutely shattered. night all. oh love to trace xxx

vag When Ds was new he put on weight at a hilarious rate, but then from a few months old he slowed down and at neary 2 1/2 he's a norma height and weight. I'm glad, I think children who seem much older than they are because of their size have unfair expectations placed on them by the outside world and inevitably disappoint, so I'm very relieved he's a totally infuriating normal toddler. Yout trips sounds fantastic - I absolutely love Australia and have been lucky enough to go twice, but I've never been to Queensland. I'm sure you'll have a smashing time. Love your comments about how the Dutch stand up on their titchy feet - hope that doesn't follow through to what we all know about foot size and, er... Good luck with the camping!

Beans sorry to hear your dad has had such a rough time. I'm too new to know the details but having seen my own mother ill twice in the last three years with severe depression (think pyschiatric units ) I know that whatever the illness/symptoms it's desperately hard to see them and your other parent suffering. It's the other way round for me - Dad's leg would have to be hanging by a thread for him to suggest he might like to put his feet up for five minutes whereas mum makes the average hypochondriac look stoic

Rubena your trip sounds gloriously footloose and fancy free - I need me some of that!

Kiwi hope all's well that ends well with the slapped cheek. DD had it years ago but we had no pg to worry about at the time. It's not one of those diseases I remember us all having as kids?

Lady Eeek to the in-laws - when MIL and her (transsexual - yes, really) partner come to stay it's nice to see them because they stay at a B&B - nae room at this inn.

JollyBear Hope you feel better soon, it's grim having a bug when you have to look after the children. It's about the only time I get out of going to DS in the night and getting up with him at the crack. It's almost worth it.

Sorry, back again - it's shameful but I find this more interesting than convincing a toddler to eat the toast he's just asked for. Wasted food is a real bugbear of mine but I don't want either DC to get uptight about food or keep eating when they're full so I guess it will just keep happening, despite my best efforts to give them smaller portions etc. Ho hum.

I was thinking about PP comments about things happening in their own time and babying DC and so on - I really need reminding of this sometimes. I'm tired and at full stretch all the time atm and my horizons have shrunk so that I get all sorts of stupid domestic things out of proportion. DS likes his milk from a cup with a lid and I've been getting uptight about that, esp as he's a thumb-sucker too, but he's potty trained, his speech is excellent and he's a very lively and involved little boy, so the cup-with-a-lid thing is really neither here nor there, is it? I'm going to operate a policy of natural wastage and just not replace them when they're dead, lost or broken.

Similarly his sleeping, he's waking up at least once a night then early in the morning and I'm a bad tempered old cow because of it, but all he wants is a cuddle and I couldn't refuse him that. He'll grow out of it though, won't he? Tell me I'll get a full night's sleep again one day! DD was much easier, but then as she's grown up she can be far more of a worry M's sleeping is beginning to loom over everything for me and I wonder if I should "do something" about it, which is silly really.

Angst, moi??

Jolly you have all my sympathies, hope you?re feeling better today? I?m sure BF is fine, it?s you who will suffer rather than DD, so keep yourself hydrated. My workmate picked up a nasty tummy bug in hospital when giving birth and spent the first 10 days of her DS? life vomiting constantly, she could only keep down 6 sips of water at a time, the 7th sip came straight back up. Despite this her DS fed brilliantly and didn?t even lose an oz. She lost all her baby weight and more and looked like death warmed up

Lovely to hear your news Trace, I hope your wobble is only temporary. Remember to put yourself first sometimes. It?s great to hear that P?s speech is coming on despite her small hearing probs, and take bedtime as a compliment ? you are obviously fun and she wants to play with you, whereas DH is boring and sends her to sleep . Fingers crossed for your house sale

That wedding venue is amazing Rubes. I have to say since having DD I am definitely in favour of child free weddings (or at least my child free) as they are so much more enjoyable when you can relax and enjoy some cheerfulness and not be on toddler duty. I hope your littles were kind to your hangover yesterday?

How is the camping Vaj? Booze keeping off the rain I hope?

Trudy I too hate to see food wasted, but I?m convinced my greed and inability to stop eating is down to Mum insisting I eat everything on my plate when I was young, so I try hard not be the same with DD (and then hoover up her leftovers myself ). And on the angst, DH has a theory that Mum?s HAVE to worry about their children, it?s the law. Therefore if we have nothing that really is a problem (ie health fine) then we make up problems because we can?t possibly be worry free. I?m sure he?s right, the number of times he comes home from work when I?ve been home alone with DD all day and I greet him with ?you must look at her little toenail/left eyelash/purple sock, I think it will ruin her life? and he has to bring me back to reality. I?d agree that the odd sippy cup falls into the ?want to worry about? category rather than the ?need to worry about? one

I am feeling a bit better today, after a horrendous dose of D&V yesterday afternoon ? this is probably TMI, but my bott is so sore from the constant wiping that I?ve pinched the sudocrem for myself. But I?ve managed some brekky today and got DD dressed (and picked up her up from a fall down the stairs ) and then handed her over to the ILs (the pros of living next door) and I am enjoying Saturday Kitchen and MN without interruption. I?ve even managed to wash my hair (but needed a lie down afterwards, these things are soooo draining)

Have a good weekend all, hope you?re coping with the ILs LadyT?

Trudy thanks it was nice, although the first time away from the kids so I was still on "duty" and therefore up at the usual times they wake ds still has his milk in a cup with a lid also. He seems to like his comfort and always wants to lay down on the couch when he has it. But as you say, it all evens out. He isn't TT or even near, but his speech is going in leaps and bounds and we have started the dreaded "why" phase.

Zule, I know it was an amazing place, and can't wait to put some pics on FaceB. It was quite nice not having the dc's at the wedding. I'm not against them at weddings but loved not having mine there! I felt for one of the bridesmaids who had her 1 year old who was knackered most of the day and teething. The reception venue being on the side of a cliff would have had me worried sick. The bride also has a 2.5 year old who was there as well but obviously she was off duty for the day

We had take away last night, and after my last bout of stomach cramps (gut rot) after the way too spicy meal, I have it again after plain stuff wtf?? I never had a sensitive stomach like this. I hope my take away days aren't over.

Vag hope you have a nice time camping, and the weather gets better.
Lady hope the mil status is ok

I'm knackered yet again and after dd's swimming lesson I'm done for. That and the cramps...... DH is taking DS for his soon thank God.

Having said the bride was off duty, she did ALL the bridesmaids hair for the wedding - what a star huh.

Sorry to hear about the stomach bugs Jolly and Zoe. Not nice for either of you but especially nasty for Jolly when breastfeeding. It happened to me a few times and I was told your milk will stay good but you will be even more depleted.

Glad you had a fab break Rubena. That place does look amazing. Bless your DS throwing himself on the floor each day that he saw you were gone! Did DD seem to miss you?

Sorry you are feeling tearful Trace. You aren't going back to work too quickly are you? I am glad you are enjoying it though.

How goes it with the ILs Lady? I hope they aren't driving you too mad.

Trudi - I'm not sure I have even said welcome, so, um "welcome". My DD2 was huge too, 10lbs 2oz and out traditional way which may be why I can't do the star jumps! I have no idea how much she ways now though. I'm not sure she has been weighed since she was about 4 months old. I might stick her on the scales tonight and then check in the Red Book to see how she compares.

Re babying. I really don't think it matters whether they sleep in cots, drink milk, TT early or late etc as long as they are happy and stimulated. I also think every child matures at different rates. When DD1 was DD2's age she slept in a gro bag in a cot, she drank her evening milk from a bottle, she liked to sit in the pram whenever possible, she ate dinner in a high chair and I hadn't started toilet training (and wouldn't finish with night nappies for another year and a half). DD2 sleeps in a bed, eats at the table, has not had milk for a year, is toilet trained night and day and refuses to sit in the pram. She is no better or worse for it and it will have zero impact on her future. The only difference is she wanted to be like her big sister so pushed to grow up quicker. Its funny as she looks younger due the fact that she is still very challenged on the hair growth front and has big chubby cheeks. She looks like a huge baby but acts like a teenager. Hmmmmm

lol Arti! I think both of mine have grown up fast in some ways because they want to keep up with the skids - DD was 18 months old when SS came to live with us and about a year older when SD arrived, so she can't remember them ever not being there, and of course they were there right from the start with Max, so it's his normality. He absolutely adores 17 yo SD, who it must be said has been brilliant with him from the off and is a very capable pair of babysitting hands these days, something we take advantage of as much as possible Having said that I was might put out the other day when he fell over, got upset and asked for her

Yep, not much I need to be worrying about so stuff creeps in to fill the void. I should fill the void with more interesting stuff instead. It must be said that as I drafted next week's company newsletter during M's nap earlier not once did my mind stray to thumb-sucking or sippy cups!

Hope everyone with a bad tum is better soon. If only everything else went on hold when you were ill it wouldn't be so bad, but I find it really demoralising to be faced with chaos, mountains of laundry and an empty fridge when I feel better.

Hello!

Back from my camping trip which was very wet and very windy. So we packed up early and came home yesterday. Should have stayed. I passed out in the bathroom last night bit through my lip and chipped two of my teeth. I'm in agony and look like Mike Tyson has whacked me in the face. DH heard a thud and found me bleeding on the bathroom floor. I came to but was pumping sweat , couldn't stand and then had very violent diorrea (sorry TMI). I went to the emergency dentist this morning who thinks my teeth will be okay but I have to go back in a week when the swelling goes down so they can repair the chips. BUt I am in agony, can't bite together as it either hurts my teeth or rubs the bloody great gash in my mouth.

Anyhow, sorry for the me post, back later whenI don't feel so woozy.

Oh no Deidre, so sorry to hear that, how horrible for you. Why did you pass out? I think a me post is entirely justified in the circs!

Deids that's dreadful - poor you. Have you fainted before? Hope you're feeling better.

Trace lovely to hear from you. And glad work being supportive. Thanks for offer - I will PM you too.

We went to see SIL and new niece again today. Both looking much improved. The baby is beautiful and she's definitely filled out a bit during the week. She's a bit beyond her birthweight now. I got to cuddle her too which was lovely. Thank goodness ILs have been looking after both BIL and SIL so they have been eating and getting rest. All starting to look up. Thanks so much for your kind thoughts.

DS is being stroppy mc strop this weekend, which is slightly less fun. Is phase I am sure We took the two of them swimming this morning and it was really lovely now that they are both of an age when they really enjoy it. Not sure how we will handle swimming with 3. I had another scan on Thurs and all looks well. Bean bouncing about - will be 11 weeks on Tues and am starting to relax about it all. In fact had forgotten how much pg makes me pretty relaxed about most things. Is very nice to suddenly not to worry too much. In the babying/not babying debate, DD still has milk and a dummy at night, but she's TT and her favourite saying is "no my do it" about everything from getting her own cereal to putting her shoes on.

Rubes that wedding venue looks so lovely. Glad you enjoyed the break. I heart bloody marys too. Although not at the moment. Have brilliant new soft drink of choice - pink lemonade with chopped up strawberries in it. Is fab

LadyT hope visit wasn't too terrible. Snorted into my tea on royal family comment. They would be a bit better looking if you were related, surely . He sounds like quite the cove.

Jolly hope you're feeling better. Thanks so much for sending message - SIL said it really helped.

Beans how's your Dad? And how was fancy dress party?

Vag hope the weekend was fun. Am still working on getting DH to go camping. Maybe next year when we can't afford a summer holiday because of all the Olympic tickets I bought...

Trudy I generally tend to think that these things do sort themselves out eventually, but we've been quite lucky with our 2 not having terrible sleep problems. We're also really lazy and bought an enormous bed so DD comes in with us most nights from about 4 - she doesn't even wake me any more.

ZJ hope you're feeling better too.

Oh Dieds poor you. I prescribe great wadges of painkillers and a very large glass of

Bikers of the Dec thread can I pick your brains. Dh is buying me a bike whoop whoop, I have been looking at child seats. We are thinking of this one what do think Otherwise its one on the back which I am a bit unsure about with the weight distribution plus the fact that it will be DS2 riding with me and we all know his ability to cause disasters. I figured if he was in front of me he would be easier to control.

Oh and LadyT I meant to say I know this is harking back a bit but I would definitely get your metabolism checked out - you have a pretty active life running around after 2 DCs and I think in a normal (non pg) day I would eat about twice that. And at the moment it's probably 3x . Admittedly I am fairly greedy, and normally do go running 3-4 times a week but I am really shocked you are eating that little and not losing lots of weight.

I'm back. No never fainted before. I think it might have been a touch of food poisoning from a dodge Chinese due to my reaction on coming too. Who knows! Could have been worse.

Urbs excellent news on SIL and baby. Also on your own little bean.

Trace I for one never get tired of hearing from you. Sorry you've had a wobble I'm sure its just a minor blip xx

RUbes and ZJ hope the dodgy guts are on the mend.

Right paracetemol time.

Deidre - you poor thing. Hope the paracetamol do the trick. I think dentists are brilliant these days and no doubt will be able to fix your teeth up nicely.

Urbs - glad to hear your SIL and her baby are doing well.

Lovely to hear from you Trace and Rubes.

Jam - Bike seat looks interesting as DS is growing out of his weeride and I love being able to chat with him as I cycle. I'm no expert so will await the verdict from Veggie, Summer et al.

And in other news, we have canoes YEAH !

Will post this now as I'm having computer problems at the mo'.

Woohoo Nolda what did you get?

Jam that seat looks brilliant, we have the front facing bobike seat but it only lasts til they are about two & a half. I've never seen one like that here though I have seen a similar style. I doubt they would sell that one here because I know the Dutch would not pay that much money for a child seat no matter how comfortable it would be for the child. They tend to forgo child comfort for cost, they are tight buggers. The only thing I would say is that if you are putting it on a normal bike it is going to be a little unconfortable for you to reach around to your handlebars. If it is possible to buy a dutch style motherbike with the longer frame it will make it a more comfortable ride and safer as they are easier to control. Let me know what bike your using. I think you could definitely get a good set up with this seat and good bike. Will you get a back seat for DS1?

Deids that is terrible, are you going to see your GP? It might be worth getting your BP checked. Have you had any diarrhea since? I'm glad your ok, your poor DH must have got a shock. DHs brother is a dentist and he put caps on DHs teeth to fix them up and even them out and they look great.

Our camping trip was lovely but a bit chilly. Unfortunately I went for a run on Saturday which was lovely and I was doing a decent speed but then a stupid little trip up which happened because I was turning back to look at something and not watching where I was going. I went over on my ankle because of a little bump on the path, I felt a nasty crack feeling in my left ankle, which was the one I sprained badly last September, and it is now more than twice as big as my right ankle & its incredibly painful. I'm so annoyed with myself, I had a five km race next week and the triathlon in June if this is bad I might have to miss it, or at the least have very little training time to prepare. But besides the races its bloody difficult to look after the boys and do all our daily bits. DS1 has violin tomorrow & I've no idea how I'm going to get him there. DH is working away tomorrow & is away overnight later in the week. So so annoying.

Urbs its nice to hear you are feeling more relaxed with things, Hooray for sticky baby.

Trudy, I agree. My cousins boys is quite big and she had random strangers asking her why her son couldn't talk at 18months. People thought he was closer to 3!

Oh no vag - people are really in the wars atm. Hope the ankle doesn't put you out of the competitions. I feel very inadequate hearing about all this exercise as the house would have to be on fire for me to break into a trot! I have a violinist too, DD is working for Grade III and has just gone up to a 1/2 size. M has now appropriated her first violin, a 1/8 size, for himself which looks very cute and has now got me thinking that we might let him have lessons from three or four. DD was rising five when she started and she's soaked it up. She's mathematical and loves chess too, which I always think fits together with being musical. I'm none of the above!

Deidre hope you're feeling more comfortable this morning and got some sleep.

I feel like a new person today as I was asleep by 10pm and DS slept through til 6am, hurrah! It makes such a huge difference. Only thing was he woke for the nth morning running with a soaking nappy which had soaked his PJs and vest too He has an Anywayup Cup of milk at bedtime (though to my joy another lid died this morning so we're one step closer to ditching them, they're just so ^big^!) but no top-ups in the night, no water or anything, so I'm surprised he's weeing quite so much. I'll try the next size up of nappy, I've heard people say that does the trick.

I have my other working head on today, I'm off to sit for a group of artists - this is what pays for DD's violin lessons! It's a new group today which is fab, it's a while since I've had extra work over the class I usually sit for. Hope they're friendly and that I can find them okay as they're miles out in the middle of nowhere.

Erk, must go and stop DS rummaging in the bin for the dead lid!

Oh dear, I have had a horrid start to the day and am covered in guilt with regards to how my kids react to my working. DD1 asked me last week whether "children whose mummies go to work will have to go to work when they have children" and I explained that hopefully most people can choose but sometimes people need money so have no choice but to work. Stupid answer as she then asked if I had a choice, which I suppose I did, then she said when she has children she will always choose to stay with them. Fast forward to this morning when she watched me get dressed and said "Sarah's mummy won't be putting on a smart suit now because she isn't a mummy who chose to go to work". There was no malice in either of these remarks. Just her commentary on how things are.

Meanwhile DD2 has taken to screaming and crying as soon as she's dees me get ready for work and then clinging to me like a little koala as I try and leave. And I leave her with DH as he starts work later. So hard. In fact DD2 just is v hard work at the mo. Her clothes obsession now extends to nightware and she will only wear nighties, never PJs, as she "doesn't want to be a daddy". Last night she woke up at 1am having wet the bed. Her nighties was wet so I removed it and tried to replace it with PJs. Cue 30 mins of screaming tantrums bang in the middle of the night. All alternatives were rejected. I ended up having to naughty step her at 1.25am which felt v cruel on us all.

So to summarise I feel like a cruel and stressed mother.

Back later but first wanted to say congrats to Urbs on another good scan.

Oh Arti what a horrid start to the day! Children have a great way of over simplifying everything, not that it makes youfeel any better at the time. As for DD2, no idea! My DD is almost 5 and is clothes obsessed we argue every morning over what she can/can't wear, its infuriating.

Vag, your poor ankle - are you goingto have it X rayed? You may have a hairline crack if you heard it go? Obviously youwillhave more of an idea of what you have done but that is a real pain about not being able to train. Just as you were going great guns too. Try and rest up whenever you get the chance. The chores can wait a while.

Trudy I am in awe of your musically talented children. I played violin briefly as a child, but it never amounted to much.

Lip is twice the size today, and tooth still completely numb. Can't really eat, I'm already sick of soup. To make matters worse had to abandon my first coffee ofthe day half-way through. I can't function....

Hello all! Deids - your poor face. Do you faint regularly? I've never done it yet...

Arti - oh poor you. How horrible to feel bad for going to work. It must be really tough when actually it's such a normal thing to do. I admire you for doing it - not sure I'd have the stamina! Maybe one day I'll go back!!!

Trudy are you nude for the sittings for artists? Does it pay well?

Fancy dress party was absolutely brilliant. We left the kids overnight with inlaws and just had a blast. Felt rotten yesterday, but not tooooo bad. It was so nice to stay in a B&B with DH. Although woke up at 6.30 anyway! Managed to doze on and off til 8.30, though, which was bliss. Then a fry up and off to look at a house. We both absolutely love it, but the kitchen is tiny and there is no area for washing machines or ironing. I know that sounds silly, but I really find the kitchen is the hub of the house and there's barely room to swing a cat in there. And the washing machine and tumble dryer were upstairs in the bathroom, which was horrible anyway. Hmmm. Garden incredible though...

I was a bit annoyed with MIL, as she didn't stick to the potty training with DD1 and put her in a nappy yesterday, which was really not what I wanted to do. I can see why as her cousins were also staying there and DD1 was so excited that on the Saturday she wet her pants 3 times with excitement when I wasn't there. But I specifically asked her not to put her in nappies. Oh dear. Never mind, not the end of the world and this morning she's done a poo in the potty and 4 wees, all off her own bat. Brilliant.

Have to go to shops shortly. What a treat on a MOnday morning! But we have no bread in the house, or butter and have just finished milk in my coffee. Yum.

Trace - sounds like you're doing well.

I just have to tell you something that has amused DH and me all weekend... We've been to look round 4 houses so far and I've needed a poo in 3 out of 4 of them. It's so embarrassing. And since babies, when I've got to go... I've GOT TO GO! And so have been. Then yesterday, we went to look round the outside of the one I saw on Saturday morning (which I'd done a poo in). There was no one in, so we were allowed to roam the garden, which was good. There is this wild part, away from the house, with a barn in and I had to go and do an al fresco poo outside because of my hangover. So embarrassing and DH has forbidden me from telling anyone about it because he's so ashamed! Then we got terrible giggles about it in the car on the way back because I said it might make a nice snack for a fox and we were picturing the poor foxes dropping dead from just the smell. All very puerile and childish, but god we laughed!

Oh Vag that is so annoying about your ankle. Poor you. Have you got it up - being medical, I'm sure you have.

We have no bread in the house today, so post cornflakes, DD1 is now having a chocolate biscuit for breakfast. Man I'm a good mother...

Deids can you make it an iced coffee and sip it through a straw? You poor thing mouth pain is the worst I think. Have you been feeling faint again all?

Trudy my DS1 is really into maths too, I didn't realise there was a connection but it does make sense. He is equally enthusiastic about notes and counting rhythms so it definitely goes together. DS2 has now joined a violin specific toddler music group. It is with DS1's teacher and its a brilliant class. The kids have a pretend violin and we all play together mums & kids. Us mums can only play some rhythms & twinkle twinkle but the idea I guess is the Suzuki one of kids copying their mums. He loves it and is just learning so much.

I need to charge my phone so will be back later.

Beans that alfresco poo is hilarious. And clearly indicative of how huge the garden is that you could get back to the house in time. Yes my ankle is up Beans & big cock little cock is on....Hooray....???

Phone is charging so can continue.

Arti I'm really feeling your pain, who is Sarah? I have to say this is why I resent the news & radio going on about all these dodgy research into kids in nursery, or mums who BF til 6months or whatever kids hear it and take it in, and apply it to themselves. Imagine if your DD1 heard some negative research about children of working mums, most of that research is seriously flawed but the kids don't know that they just hear the sensationalist headline.

Oh that artist modeling sounds interesting how did you get into that. Does it pay well?

Day one of TT here - we have to stay in for the plumber so thought I'd go for it. Potty 1 Rug 2.

Urbs: great news on the scan :).

Deids: you poor thing, hope the swelling goes down soon.