FESH Spa & Creche: Plenty more FESH in the brie

[CUNextTuesday]

Welcome all those with aching scars, undercarriages, eyelids and limbs. Find comfort here. Menfolk barred.

Milano we love the buggyboard. TT has only sat in a pram once since we got it - she likes to ride around on the back now, hopping on and off. We have a Quinny Speedi as our main pram. The board fits fine, although it helps to have the handle extended as far as we can get it.

We gave LG a bit of banana to suck on while we were on the train today. He was loving sucking it, then he actually bit a lump off and proceded to gag like mad before projectile vomming it across the train. We ended up with a nice space to ourselves . Shame he didn't do that on the way back. Sodding British travelling public - would rather let me smack them round the back of the legs with a buggy than move over when I say 'excuse me.' So I smacked 'em. And as for the possibility of moving to let a woman with 2 small children sit down - fuck that! There were loads of single seats, but I wasn't about to let my 3 year old daughter sit next to some strange bloke by herself of an hour while I went and sat next to another strange bloke and stuffed my baby up my jumper. And they all pretend they haven't seen you - till I smack them with the pram . I am the rammy-prammy-mammy!!

Go box with the joe public abuse! Get some spikes on 'dem wheels to slice their ankles. Oh and if you do do that ride let me know your start or approx finish time and I could drive over and welcome you with cake!

Has anyone managed to watch that programme "Toughest place to be a....midwife"? I taped it but can't bear to watch it. The trailer has scared the crap outta me. Frightened of what I may see!

yoo hoo chaps.

BOOB tops are great investment. Think I have medium and large - prefer the large one as not so tight around my beanbag of a tummy. My boobs are GINORMOUS but medium also ok. I've got about 8 and they are the business. The t-shirt one is getting more wear than the vests now actually.

Box I like your ramming strategy. I would very much like to do more of that to annoying people who jam up shops and pavements.

Cunty MASSIVE good luck for tomorrow. Am thinking of you girlfriend.

WAtching with interest on the weaning front. I am desperate looking forward to introducing baby rice. Got an annabel karmel book yesterday so hoping this is going to mean nice long lie ins every day. HAHAHAHAHHAHA.

Box think TT probably likes board because she is over 3 non? Mini Oke would like it for about 5 mins and then say "no like it" then I have an issue on my hands and typically it will be raining and I would be running late to where I need to be.

I have been chucked up on again today (as well as Saturday night). This time I was slightly more prepared and caught most of the sick in mini oke's plate (grim.com).

Hope the rest of the day trip went well Boxer. We should've come with you as the fecking MW didn't turn up.

I was supposed to return to work after 6 months with LC but couldn't do it so extended ML by 3 months....was v. definitely ready then and happy to leave the newly mobile babe in the care of the professionals. Not sure what I'll do this time as I don't even have a job to go back to, although not working is not an option, both for my bank balance and my sanity

I watched it Silv - was a fascinating insight into birthing in Africa and dispels the myth that they squat down, plop them out and carry on doing their business. Treatment of the women was bloody appalling too.....we are so lucky to have the NHS, even if it is under-resourced and manned by dragons stressed-out/over-worked/under-paid folk.

Def worth a watch IMO

just a quickie to wish cunty all the best for tomorrow. hope all goes ok. X

am currently somewhere on the m6, travelling home with a baby who this evening had a bloody nose following a base jumping incident. there was crying from at least four eyes. Not good for mental stabilty. See you all tomorrow. I'm praying for a lie-in seeing as we'll get home at about 1 or 2am.

Oh rastus picks tonight to go into orbit at 9.40pm. Nothing but 4 fl.oz. would suffice. I'm so weak and pathetic but nothing worked in the 50 minutes he was hollerin. Now i get 3 hours per sleep so he'll be awake and hungry twice before morning, mark my words

Good luck curlsworld hope you have a peaceful trip and the little nose isn't too swollen, poor mite.

Tues knock 'em dead today! Literally cos then no need to go back ever! Seriously, hope your first day whizzes by and you are back home with Rastus pdq.

cas hope your stunt baby in training is ok and that your nerves aren't too frazzled.

That. Was. A . Shocking. Nights. Sleep.

ski's tip. Trowel on the make-up. When your eyes close during a meeting you can blame the weight of your mascara. How did it go getting him in to creche? Bear cried when two little boys came over to investigate and at the first set of lights leaving the house I realised I'd forgotten to pack his bottle - doh. So JB will have to go around later. He laid a stinky poo whilst I was dropping him off so I cleaned him and by the time I left he was eating his breakfast and being chatted to in Dutch.

I left my pack lunch "somewhere" in the house though in my panic to get everything organised. Arse. Looks like I'm on vending machine food today. Gah.

Re: Midwife in Liberia - I watched the first 10 minutes and realised that I was going to end up bawling/throwing up - and then the cable connection went and I didn't bother to re-set it. Hallelujah for quasi-private Dutch healthcare!

Yeah i forgetted his bottle too! Hom takes him in the morning and he informed me the 'package was successfully delivered'. I've got so much make up on i barely recognise myself and yes i've forgotten my lunch too. Win!

hope it goes ok today cuntsmelove

OMFG - small child having nap in cot. I thought it would never happen. I'm not waking him up to go to the Baby group, much rather he naps in cot, then transition to sleeping in there FT hopefully won't be too traumatic for me him. HI will be jumping me bones as soon as the boy is out of room I bet ya.

HorseyGels need advice. Bear with me..... HIs friends GF wants to get back into horses and everything that goes with it after a five year break. Can't afford to contribute but happy to help. Works FT. But is really a very nice person. HI mentioned I might need help. Thing is i don't but out of kindness I said she could come and gain some experience with me but it wouldn't be regular As I need someone who can contribute and who does not work FT as nag is not for schooling so would limit riding in winter as cannot hack in dark! She's been once to my yard and we did basics but it took two hours! Thing is I don't really have the time to do this cos when I do have time I need to use the opportunity to ride not watch someone groom me hoss. Have asked a pal if she needs help and she does but the gal in question is ignoring my msgs. So do I leave it be or do the decent thing which I offered and continue to let her learn with me?

Holy shit silver me too! It does involve putting very very loud white noise on my phone near his head in cot and can't move it. For some reason it does not work on speakers on the ipod. Weird. Such a relief not to sit there bouncing the poor thing until he eventually gives up and sleeps for 10 minutes.

cuntypops hope today is ok and you don't spend too much of it worrying. x

Off to get the giant fur knots on doggymoo's ears taken off. God my life is fun, fun, fun.

Last night was back to crap again - 1am, 2am (cried but went back to sleep without me moving), 4.30am giant poo and change and feed. Basically if he eats at 4ish, he is nowhere near hungry at 7. I can't get him interested until 9. How do I feed him and get him back to sleep without giving him too much??????????

Pob Hwyl for today Cunty!

We can start a FESHbaby acrobatic troupe with all these flying babies! It's only a matter of time before I slip and fling Clint down the stairs, esp if he won't let me sleep....

It must be the morning for it, Artie is asleep in his car seat, managed on his own. I shoved him in as we're going out in a minute and he was winging, and he went to sleep.

makes up for the fact that we had to sleep on the sofa as he refused to be put down last night.

Honey, we also had a middle of the night poo - well 2 actually, within about half an hour of each other. What's that all about??

JB can't find my packed lunch either. Anyone fancy a sweepstake as to actually where I put it this morning whilst racing around trying to get everyone (me, him, dogs) organised?

Hope they're easing you back in gently Cunty.

If JB's searching skills are anything like MrClucks your lunch will be in the most obvious place.

Have been discharged from MW care today. The fatboy has put on 9 1/2 oz this week which is pretty good going, non? Stitches all looking normal too so is a matter of days 'til I'm back on the horse.

Btw, I find your views on sleeping babies repulsive.

Eh? Am I missing something Alps?!

Just checking in to say Cunty I hope you are surviving the day. Bet you can't wait to get home to your gorgeous boy.

Having been lurking and reading of the white noise I went off and got it on my phone. And I managed to get BB to sleep IN HER COT! Only for half an hour mind, but it is a step in the right direction. I don't mind her sleeping downstairs, but she is not settling down here at the mo and it is driving me nuts. Nothing worse than an overtired screechy baby.

Ok... there are probably a few things worse than that. Like running out of gin. Or cookies.

Just being silly Pols. Trying to raise a smile with an old joke.

Bear came home from first day at creche with huge smiles and full of laughter. According to his book he's had a good day, 2 sleeps and eaten well. Popped him in to bed about 20 minutes ago and he rolled over and went straight to sleep. I think he is pooped. :)

We have had our first day just the two of us today, TBG is back at work. Day started well. Got her dressed and fed, got me dressed and fed. Then went out to the shops for an hour and she slept in her pram.

Then back home and it's the never ending feeding. I am starting to worry that it's not cluster feeding and she's not getting enough. She's gained weight. She produces dirty and wet nappies very nicely. We went through a ton of sleepsuits yesterday due to leakage. But she just feeds and feeds and never sleeps. Managed an hour nap today. She's sort of napping on my lap now. But mostly she just wants to be on the boob. I keep telling myself it's a growth spurt, but how do I know?