FESH Spa & Creche: Plenty more FESH in the brie

[CUNextTuesday]

Welcome all those with aching scars, undercarriages, eyelids and limbs. Find comfort here. Menfolk barred.

sorry, I meant the days when she won't sleep. Is it one day on, one day off (or does it at least feel like that). Or does she sleep better the majority of days?

Poor baby Casp, hope on the mend soon.

It feels like it's every other day. Maybe every third day. I think I'm going to have to start being strict about getting up at 7am. I have a theory that when she gets up at 7 she naps nicely at about nine and the day goes smoothly. If she goes back to sleep straight off in the morning it all goes to pot. I have no idea if it'll work.

She is very inconsistent in sleeping at night as well. I'm sure it will settle down. And as long as it's not a bad day every day it's easier to cope.

I kept a diary once I had had enough of doing everything on demand, to see if Squeaks was hinting at any sort of routine herself. I marked up bottles, sleeps, mood etc. It kept changing, but it did give me a clearer insight, especially when all the days ran together and it was hard to remember what happened when during the sleepless haze. Maybe that will help?

I think I'll try that. I need to figure out what's working on the good days. I may see some sort of pattern.

I have to say reluctantly it was establishing a routine that worked for L and sleep, Muse. And I think you're right about the getting up in the morning. Though I tended to go for 7:30 whenever I could. It just felt more humane. For me, obviously

Do you drink caffeinated drinks muse? I found that caused nap problems for Rastus. It seemed to get better when i switched to decaff. Only a theory mind, can't guarantee it.

Oh yes good point. We always have decaff anyway as caff gives tgo palpitations, but I noticed a marked lack of sleep on the few occasions I have had caff.

Oh Muse. Non-stop weeping is very trying to the nerves. Berwhale seems to respond best to days when we get straight up in the morning: if we're up and about from his first morning feed and get out of the house for a walk by lunchtime he seems to settle better for the rest of the day, even without naps.

That and a dummy, which comes in useful as a distraction. Or there's the Karp scary method, which I've not mastered, but involves swaddling, shushing, jiggling, a dummy and patting. Working his magic on Richard and Judy .

God if only she'd suck on a dummy for more than 5 minutes! She will sometimes take one, suck it furiously for 5 minutes, and then spits it out in disgust.

Like you it's definitely better when we get up and out Drom, even if she doesn't nap. On a good day it's wake 7am, feed, cuddle, nap about 9am for long enough for me to get showered/dressed/put laundry on. Then feed and out of the house at about 11am. I shall have to start sticking to that.

I managed to feed her into a 45 minute nap. She fed and then got very upset again. TBG has just got her to calm down by putting her in the Baby Bjorn, bending over so she's sort of hanging and swinging her side to side. I am now considering buying a stupidly expensive electric swing that we don't have space for and she'll probably hate.

And I didn't have any caffiene today but did yesterday. How quickly does it have an effect?

Have you talked to honeymoo Muse ? She had that sleep consultant in and it seemed to be making the difference last I saw. I don't know what strategies they used but something might be of use...

I often wish you could put dummies on elastic and fasten them round babies' heads...

That man is amazing Drom. I am going to try that. I need to practice using the blanket I got given for swaddling. First time I tried it all fell apart.

Cass You're not supposed to do that? Dammit.

Muse Genuinely amazing dude, indeed. He spends a lot of time talking about 0-3 months being the fourth trimester, which I quite like as babies are ridiculously helpless. Like I said, I haven't put all the parts together, but definitely found swaddling plus dummy = good.

I do swaddling plus white noise at night, although with the swaddlepod rather than a blanket. Stops her shaking herself awake.

cass When Bonnie was born this older night time midwife helped me get her to sleep by swaddling her in such a way that the swaddle went around her head and locked the dummy in place! I dutifully showed MrP how it was done so we could replicate it at home, and only later realised that it probably wasn't such a good idea...

So for the next thread, are we going to take up alps' suggestion of the CRESH (Child-Rearing Evil Selfish Hags)? Or will that confuse everyone?

Ugg, I'm really nervous as MrP goes away to Schweiz tomorrow and doesn't return until Saturday night. Currently it takes both of us to get Bonnie and Clyde to bed. And often both of us to deal with the dual night time wakings. This must change, I realise. But in the mean time I have booked a Sitter to help me with bath and bed time each evening. It will get better...

Farking hell what a day. Casp Boo is definitely feeling better as she has been winding me up a treat today. No temperature any more and soooo argumentative. Sorry you are still feeling crappy Casp, I hope you and squeaks have a good restful day tomorrow. Will you have to work your day off to make up for it?

FP I feel for you. TG was away this weekend while Boo and I were both ill, and then tonight he didn't get in until both girls were in bed. I decided they didn't need baths and it made my evening much easier.

Muse sorry to hear about the inconsistent napping. Tis bloody hard work when they just yell at you no matter what you do. BB did that a lot. I found if her first nap of the day wasn't long enough, it had a knock on effect for the rest of the day and by 5pm both of us would be in tears. So I resorted to one of those awful swingy chairs which she hated at first, but now loves. She used to sleep in the chair or on me all the the time, except for the night sleep (midnight to 7am) but I am slowly weaning her off it. She does evenings and her first morning sleep in the cot, and two daytime naps in the chair. It isn't ideal and I'd rather not use it, but it has saved my sanity and allows me to get stuff done around the house or spend time with Boo.

I have to second Cass' suggestion of a diary. I did it religiously with Boo and it really helped me identify her routine. I haven't kept a diary at all this time around, mainly because poor BB has to fit in around the rest of us, whereas with Boo I was totally focused on her and led by her. I have found with BB that starting every day at 7am really helps keep us on track and we have a good little routine going now. Okie suggested that when I was really struggling - thanks for that Okes!

Alps how are doing today?

fanny I've read elsewhere on mn of people using a muslin to tie the dummy in! I believe it referred to the "netmums type" - I wouldn't do it myself but I do understand the desperation.

Just dropped him off at creche and sat him one side of a play-bar/walker thing, another little boy walked over, leaned on the other side knocking Bear over and pinning him underneath. Tears forgotten in a milisecond though which was good.

Polly Slightly better, although had the biggest row with JB last night that I've ever had with anyone in my life. I am not a "shouty" arguer but last night I was screaming and yelling with rage. Every other word was "twatting". :( I am soooo angry at him right now. We need to get a new plug socket (or two) in Bear's room. He says he's shit at DIY, so I downloaded some "how to" instructions for him which he refused to read. He also refuses to pay for a spark and I have no money right now. The "difficult friend"'s husband is an electrician, but I'm not going to continue the friendship just for leccy work. So, AIBU to do the re-wiring myself? It's not illegal and it's not rocket science. JB seems to think I will electrify the entire house. :( But actually the argument was about housework. I am not overly houseproud , but when I do something, I do it properly - you know, no point mopping the floor if you've not got all the dog hair out of the corners. He said it was the first time he'd ever seen me do housework and I just lost it. I'm sure you pol understand where I'm coming from!

Glad you are feeling a bit better but sorry about the row alpy. I'd probably not mess with electrics, but that is because i wouldn't have a clue what I was doing! I'm with you on the 'not houseproud, but if I do it, I do it properly'. I've watched TG clean a work top - he basically swoops a cloth around the middle section without looking and then just chucks the cloth back in the sink. Given that when he makes toast he manages to scatter crumbs over a 4 foot section of worktop you can imagine what gets let behind. I know it is a little thing but it drives me fucking nuts! He is incapable of even making coffee without slopping it over the edge of the mug when he stirs it - and then he claims he can't see the mess because he is colour blind.

He really pissed me off on Sunday - he got back from his weekend away at about 6pm, just in time to bath the girls, but instead he sat on his arse tweeting. Then he spent all evening moaning about stupid small stuff. So I asked him what was really wrong and didn't he have a good weekend? He said he had a really good weekend but just felt tired and deflated. I asked why deflated and he said 'because it is just back to reality again and it is so tedious and filled with jobs and never any rest and blah blah blah'. I barked 'well I am so sorry your reality is so shit' and stomped out for a run. I know he does a job he hates to keep us all (and will have to keep doing for the next 3 years while I get my degree) but he doesn't seem to get the same enjoyment out of the children that I do and that makes me really sad. I know he loves them, and he is really great with them, if a little short in patience sometimes with Boo. I just get the feeling we are a drag and there is always something else he'd rather be doing. In contrast I am finding things much easier and thought we were getting on really well second time around but he said he finds it harder. Given that he was the one who wanted to get married and have baybees asap, he is doing a remarkably good impression of someone who'd rather be single!

Hell no!!! I'm surprised you didn't rip all his limbs off! Men are so infuriating.

MB has still no poo'd. If he doesn't poo today should I go to the HV tmw?

I've been trying to figure out MBs routine now we've started weaning. I'm gonna copy follow costa in that am going to give milk an hour or so before food and will offer water with meals. I think. Sheesh I'm indecisive!!!

This whole weaning lark is screwing with my going to the stables. So have no idea how I will figure this all out.

Bloody stupid computer just lost my post, bah. Silvia how long since MB last poo'd? Does he seem in pain or grumpy? BB had terrible constipation when we started the infant gaviscon and HV just told me to give her cooled boiled water and massage her tummy in a clockwise motion (but not just after feeding as it made her puke!). My mum said when we were babbies they were advised to give either diluted orange juice, or brown sugar dissolved in hot water.

Today is day 3. He's sat on my lap trumping like a trooper!

Morning.

Alps I wouldn't mess with the electrics, but if you're confident you know what you're doing give it a go. No reason why you couldn't do it. However, over here I think you'd have to get a professional to do it or sign it off as safe. There's new rules since an MP's daughter died after getting electrocuted from a shoddy socket.

Sorry about rubbish menfolk. Poppy I did get a comment from TBG that although he loves all this he was finding it hard not having any time to himself. You can imagine how well that went down. Particularly as I'm the one who spends every evening modelling a baby nipple clamp accessory while he plays on his computer. I think he gets plenty of me time. He did apologise.

I have crippled myself trying to get a morning nap in. Well over an hour walking round the local parks, big massive blister from stupid trainers and about a 25 minute nap. FFS. She does seem a bit happier now though.

Wwyd? Artie?s ear was leaking again overnight Sunday, but nothing since then and his temp has gone. I have a docs appointment for tomorrow am, but not sure if to take him or not, what do you think?

msue does she like the tiger in the tree hold? That often used to calm artie down. Also check ebay for swing, I got mine for 20squids. Am about to sell it actually, but think cost of posting to you would be a bit silly.

muse look on the brightside, you'll get dead fit

cossie Ah, crossed posts - haz just emailed you. WWID? Smear some marmalade in his ear and take him anyway!

muser Actually I do feel quite confident doing it - the DIY sites out there are amazing, you download the instructions (with pikchas! ) and it even tells you which tools to buy. It's no more complicated than building circuits at O'Level Physics, just a bit more dusty as I'll have to dig a channel in the wall to extend the wiring.

I think I've had a truce with JB, I think he's depressed. :( Wants to earn more money - don't we all dahlink? :( I am still umming and aahing about a new job. Reasons to leave mine: i) massively underpaid, ii) bunch of arseholes. Reasons to stay: i) flexi-time, ii) work from home, iii) better the arseholes you know (or something).

muser I am not laughing very loudly , but I seem to remember about 6 weeks ago you telling us how wonderful TBG was and how he couldn't do enough to help. One cynical bastard here () made some sarky comment about it not lasting at 6 weeks they'd become crap. Honestly, they're all the same - they all whine about feeling tired and us women are left thinking "wtf? I went to work 8 hours today and looked after the baby and cooked your cocking dinner and I didn't even spit in it!".

silv prune juice? I don't think it's that bad yet personally. I once read of someone's 4 month old going 11 days! The horror!