Dec 2008 - Hello 2011 the Year of the Toddler!

[DeidreBarlow]

Totally unispired but hope you all find it...

yeah - finally decided that last night then added up the cost of a hire car the size we would need, stumbled on the fact that we will have a car problem when it gets returned in that dh's uncle will get stuck at LAX since the car needs to be returned, added up the cost of the hire car and all that and dh said "Christ it would be cheaper to fly your parent's out to NZ like we first thought" - I then rang them to feel em out a bit since telling them we weren't coming, and got the ole "oooooh we really want to see you and the kids and feel sad that we don't know when we will see them again, but really can't come unless you pay etc etc" and that pissed me off then and there and discounted the idea AGAIN - I think it's pathetic that they won't make the 3 hour flight to see us if I bring them unless WE pay. Given that they have had concessionary tickets for TWELVE years off me!It makes me want to teach them a lesson. Yes Vag, I know the kids won't get much out of it. it's probably selfish. A few photo's and if they don't get to see their G'parents well it's probably silly. My friend wants to see them but she'll live, and I need to cut the cord a bit, I guess I just don't like the idea of the first time I leave them for a few days, I'd be leaving them in a foreign country (The US) while we go to another country etc etc. Perhaps I need to ditch the whole entire thing and go on a Club med skiing deal. probably be cheaper, or might even crash Ladyt's hols in Egypt

it's DH's Birthday today and I was up till 1am on the phone and didn't wake until he's already left for work ds came in and tipped a massive bag of Mega Blocks on my head at 10 to 7 and dh had already gone Oh well he's on a half day so perhaps a pub lunch or curry tonight.... No gift yet as he is banging on about a bike frame in the US for about 2K so hardly want to get him something he doesn't really want for the sake of it.

Happy Australia Day Vagorola!

Yes Jam it was holiday related frustration.... bet you are excited about NY! When are you back? I should hope mil leaves your house the way she finds it

Spot hope your night was OK?

Kiwi oh so sorry....

Good luck JB...

rubes I think you should go for the Club Med option. Seriously. Would you have to pay full price for their NZ flights?

Oh I want a new bike! When I am riding more again I think I shall get one :-). Do you have the link to that bike Rubes? I have just downloaded some turbo training videos to use on my turbo. They are called "sufferfest". Yikes. Probably the turbo training equivalent of the 30 day shred.

Thanks for food tips everyone. Especially vag for the foods he would eat. They sound like they had a v similar repertoire. And I am doing a two pronged attack - one is the "We are eating all together, we are having this, if you don't want it you get fruit and yoghurt". He almost always has just fruit and yoghurt, but he doesn't complain. My friend was clearly shocked by a) his refusal to eat even a bite of things and b) by the fact that I didn't give him something else, and the fact that I didn't seem worried. This has made me question myself! But the other prong of attack is to do what you are doing, and sneak veggies and meat into what he already likes. With limited success, he can often taste it. I tried mixing some fish finger centre, ie white fish into his pesto pasta (cut up really small) as I had been giving him fish fingers and pesto pasta and he would eat the fish fingers (used to but no more), but he tasted it immediately "NO LIKE IT". Also whizzed broccoli into pesto pasta, limited success, have to only put a tiny bit in or "NO LIKE IT" rears its ugly head. Oh and yes he also likes eggy bread sometimes, it is good as he has almost as much egg on it as he would in an omelette (when he ate omelettes - again used to but no more - he would only eat a one egg one). So I shall use that line of attack too. To be honest we are not that organised to eat all together that often, but we have been the last week, hence him skipping loads of meals. Oh and the OTHER THING that pissed me off was his nursery worker said to me "Oh if he's fussy you should just not let him get down til he's eaten everything, that's what my mum did". Yeah fine if I want to stay up til midnight everynight. Then she goes, "I soon started eating all my food as fast as possible". It was only when I left the nursery that I thought "Hang on, you're about 20 years old 5'6 ish and weigh about 16 stone at a guess. Perhaps your mums strategy wasn't so good after all" Is that really horrible of me???

Oooh jam I am excited for you re holiday. Is the house looking lovely?

Avo sorry to hear about your DD1s bad dreams. I hope they improve soon, sorry I don't have any good tips really, but lots of sympathy.

Oh Rubes by that bike I meant the one your DH was going to get you not his pimpy 2K frame.

@ pimpy bike Summer! I'll ask him to email me the link and post it when he does. Seriously though, it's only a bike for me and is about £400 and not carbon I think so nothing of your league!
No we don't have to pay full fare on most other airlines and to NZ - it's on another airline so there's a small charge of 90% off the full walk up fare plus taxes which are usually more than the fare. But again, it's standby. I need to actually get a fare quote for tha, so you can end up royally screwed if you don't do your homework which isn't so fun as adults, let alone with kiddies in tow. If it works out too much that'll be another reason not to do it! I must be the most indecisive person in the world, not to mention boring everyone senseless with my non-important issues
Promise I will shut up now.
DH also has a load of Turbo training vids downloaded but he hasn't used it in ages... Seems to be getting back into it slowly now though and has ridden to work on his single speed for about the last 2 weeks

SL ignore that friend, I'm sure she is well meaning but she has never been there. Believe me by being as chilled as you are you've saved yourself a lot of grief. I'm sure poor DS1 is going to have some sort of eating disorder because I've gone mental too many times about his eating.

Rubes, its fair enough to want to take them, your a family you want them to be with you on the other side of the world. However, your mil is much better with them and she wants to go to the US why not go back to that option with them staying with her and DH and you doing the upper class flights. Then they are at least with two people who know them well. Or just ditch the whole thing and go skiing.

DH and had a bit of a row last night as we have used all our savings here and only just made it through to pay day this month. We did have Christmas etc but we haven't been on a proper holiday for ages and we are not extravagant people but we seem to spend like we are. I think we need to sort out our shopping to start. DH goes to the shops for a couple of things and comes back with half the shop. I think I need to sort out the online shopping, or have a definite list that we stick to. People here tend to shop as they need stuff which we have adopted, but we still manage to buy lots of just in case crap. Anyhoo, its got to stop, DH is on a decent wage so we should be saving heaps but we're not.

Vag - it's because I can't go Upper unless I'm travelling with my own company, and they dont have a flight out of LAX to AKL only Air NZ does in which case it would be economy. Anywho.... it's all irrelavent, as I did what I should have done in teh first place and got a fare quote just now from Staff travel and it's way more than we really should be spending for dh and I to nip over to NZ while the kids stayed in America anyway. I then went back to plan A which was that we just go to the US for 5 days, all come back then I go alone in Upper class as the flights looked great with tons of seats. I neglected to check the round trip though and they are all fine except the return flight HKG - LHR it's way too full and over sold in some cabins so therefore I would possibly get stuck in HKG or a crap seat on that last leg which I have no interest in doing! Now I'm just going to check the flight loads on that Air NZ leg anyway, and hope that they tell me it's really full so I can happily wright off the whole wedding given that nothing is working at all in favour of going!
I had no issue in spending the money to go (and time) when the trip incorporated a trip hom to see my friends and family, but when it's soley for the wedding I just can't justify it, as too many obstacles are in the way, leading me to think it's a sign to let it go
We are the same re: money Vag. You know they it doesn't really matter your income, people always live 10% above it

Rubes - seriously, don't go. I think it's causing you far too much angst just considering it. Imagine actually doing it. Definitely book a clubmed skiing trip or caribbean trip and just have a lovely time chilling, rather than fretting. In the long run, the kids won't remember it and instead you can get on with spending the money on yourselves on a holiday, rather than on your parents' trip, which sounds a bit unfair on you and DH. Go on a trip when the nippers are a bit older and will remember their grandparents.

Well it stopped being my parent's trip awhile ago, it turned into just us going, but yes you are right, it's all becoming too hard basket as none of it's coming together. I shall put the figures to dh tonight and see what he wants to do and go along with whatever since it's his birthday!

Am working on the house so can't absorb the details but for now, Rubes, I will only second what Beans says. Whatever the heck you do I strongly feel you should do something you and your DH will ENJOY. Big happy birthday to him from the G&T household.

DD2 chatting! She says mamamama. Both girls said mama first, not dada. Marvellous. They are well trained! Actually, I haven't coached them at all. V chuffed with her. Hurray!

SL - been meaning to say - we have same issues with DD1 not eating here. It seems to go in waves. Ok at moment, but I just give her what she likes really, as then I know she's eaten enough and she will eat macaroni cheese and spag bol and fruit etc. So, I think that'll do. She won't eat veg apart from uncooked frozen peas and the seeds out of a tomato. She loves fishfingers and sausages. But has gone off eggy bread. Her diet really isn't varied, but I'd rather she ate something she liked than nothing at all. Last night they told me at nursery that she'd eaten a baked potato with tuna and cheese at tea, so was just going to give her a small supper. And she scoffed a piece of toast with marmite, a brioche, the leftovers from DD2's fruit pot, a whole load of grapes and blueberries, 3 of those organix carrot crisps and 2 cups of milk. Quite extraordinary!!! But it's so rare. Often will eat pretty much nothing!

Hello everyone,

SL Not naughty to think unkind thoughts about that nursery worker at all! Plus, I think relaxing about DS's eating is half the battle so don't let your friend's attitude make you stress out. Veg's strategy sounds really good, particularly keeping things seperate so, pesto pasta with meatballs on the side not cut up small and mixed in.

trace Don't stress about the consultant appointment! Perhaps you could note down your thoughts on being referred again so you know what you want to say and won't forget if you get flustered.

zoe Your poor friends are going through the mill. I hope they are getting good support from the hospital. Thanks for the words of encouragement for the baby's lungs!

effie You'll be pleased to hear I had Heat with me and also the Mysteries of Sherlock Holmes. I remember you are a fan!

avo My BP is lower than yours was 142/95 at the peak and have the two ++ of protein. I think it is the combo of that along with my other conditions that is getting the drs all twitchy.

Thanks for all your kind words ladies. Thankfully my BP was lower today although the consultant is insisting I go into the day unit every day for assessment to keep an eye on things. I was asking them whether it was a silly idea to take DD with me tomorrow. Apparently it is written in my notes that any repeat of the high BP and I'm to be readmitted, so that'll be a no then! I'll have to see if the in-laws can have her again.

JB That sounds a little better but yes definately wise to leave DD at home if you can!

Avo How is DD1 today? I'm sorry that she is upset, so awful for both of you. Maybe its just all to do with getting used to school?

Off out for dinner with friends tonight, so DH is off to the chippy shortly for him and the DC's...not fair I love that smell (and taste).

Oh now I want hot chips!!

Happy Aussie day Pubus! I was going to do pies and mash but Linda mcCartney pies are high calories and I made a nice curry yesterday for today that I could do a little side variation of for the boys so we could eat together. Unfortunately I chopped up the chilli bit with bare hands and touched my eyes, spicy eyes!

SL meant to say while you were telling that nursery lady story I was thinking, "I wonder if she's fat" and yes she is.

Avo your poor DD1, I want to give her a little cuddle.

JB if its a bit better tomorrow would they consider doing it at your GP surgery, or getting the community MWs to do it. I have to say there are things that the HCPs go a little over the top on in pregnancy, but BP is something that if its high you want to keep an eye on, so I agree with it being done, but going to the hospital each day is gonna be tiring.

DS2 was so cute tonight, we heard one of them come down the stairs but no one appeared in the Livingston, I said to DH "I'm sure I just heard one of them come down, did you hear something?" DH said yes so went to have a look, next thing DS2 who was standing in the corridor, piped up with "its jus mi mummy" in the cute little voice. Oh I just love him. I ended up going upstairs and cuddling them both for a while. We sometimes lay for a while anyway at bedtime and watch old slow songs I used to love when I was younger on my phone in youtube. Tonight we watched 'reckless' by Australian crawl, and 'throw your arms around me' by hunters and collectors. Both Aussie bands so you guys probably don't know the songs.

I just read back properly and saw what the nursery worker said to you, SL. Tell her to bog off. Better, tell her that her thinking is antiquated and possibly damaging and way out of line with current thinking on the matter. Don't worry about being chilled. I am, these days. Inwardly I groan at DD1's eating but I roll with it a lot more and just keep on with the offering of foods. Getting uptight doesn't help her (or me)...

JB, I am sorry you have the fag of going in every day. That sounds very annoying but I suppose it's better that they are cautious, in a way.

DD1 has her 2 yr check tomorrow, and DD2 has her second lot of jabs. Ooops, must go but much more to say later.

Hello
jb glad your BP has lowered a little - I'll keep my fingers crossed that it doesn't go back up. So hard when you're feeling pressured to not let it rise - just makes you tense and therefore it rises! I guess you're unlikely to reach full term - how are you feeling about that? Glad the inlaws are helping out.
avo so sorry your poor dd1 is struggling. I like the idea of giving her a new 'comfort' toy or something. I guess lots of cuddles and reassurance would be how I'd play it.
Rubs I wish I could stay up later but I just fail to keep my eyes open! When my mood is low I tend to want to retreat to bed as well and have no motivation do do anything else.
Now the food thing - sorry this is quite long but this is edited highlights of the article...
"Reluctance to eat or enjoy food can be due to lack of familiarity...children need to get to know food:not just its taste but its colour, texture and smell. Children who are unwilling even to handle a new food are unlikely to want it to put it anywhere near their mouths...in practice this means letting children explore food before they are expected to eat it. This can involve anything from washing to peeling, picking, squeezing and cutting. If I'm giving a tomato to a child for the first time, I'll let her open it up and explore what's inside- the juice, the seeds, the skin - with no pressure to eat it. A mushroom can be less strange for a child when she's explored it raw - peeling off the skin and getting used to the texture, shape and smell...This approach allows parents and children to explre new foods together, so the next time a slice of cucumber is on the menu your child might decide to smell it and make toothmarks in it, rather than having a mealtime meltdown...
Top Tips: Try asking the child to kiss, lick or crunch the food.
Ask who can crunch their celery the loudest.
don't force a child to eat a meal she doesn't like.
let your child explore the components of a meal away from the table.
encourage children to be involved in the preparation and cooking.
If children don't like a particular vegetable, try introducing it to them raw - maybe with a dip.
prepare children for what is to come on their plate.
get messy - let them squash a tomato or squeeze an orange
involve the child in the whole process - take them shopping and at home let them touch the produce and talk about where it comes from"

Sorry if that was a bit long, but I thought it might have a few helpful bits in.
Phoebe is hit and miss with ehr food - one day she'll eat anything, the next she'll refuse - even if it's the same meal! Tonight we put a bowl of pasta and bolognese down in front of Phoebe which she looked at and said "no" and pushed away, so I took it off her high chair and put it on the table. She said "gogot" (yoghurt) so I said she had to wait until everyone had finished, which she wasn't pleased about, but I just ignored the moans, then when we'd finished our meals we all had a yoghurt each, which she wolfed down. She's gone to bed fine, but maybe she'll wake up starving!
Anyway I ought to go, bye for now x

this website is good - especially in the Parents section - there are activity sheets you can download for free, with songs and games and meal ideas relating to fruit and veg

Right, will clearly not catch up the past 2 weeks but here's our update:

dd2 had her bilirubin levels checked and is safely below the level she came out of hospital at, will be checked again on Friday and then officially 'discharged'. Feeding is going better, though she has got a tendency to feed for about 10 mins then conk out for an hour and wake up hungry again. Overnight this is a bit knackering but we're co-sleeping with her (shhh don't tell anyone ) so she just gets on with it and then falls asleep... will see how her weight goes on Friday. Had forgotten quite how powerful the milk reflex can be, my boobs can get quite sore when she cries [ouch] and then fire milk across the room. Delicious!

DD1 is being very lovely, lots of kisses and cuddles (though sometimkes her cuddles involve lying on top of her in a squashing kind of way ) and going on about "baby sister" lots. She's also still totally obsessed with the BF dvd that came in the bounty pack, and we need to find a way to wean her off it! Also has been in the 'sad corner' a few times at nursery for being violent to other kids, am not sure exaclty how their discipline works bt we've not been doing time out so I don't know if she understands the concept. Hard to know how to balance it, we're trying to do one thing and they're doing an other. Had to use sanctions tonight, she keeps lying down in the bath and drinking the water and even when threatened with no stories, carried on. At bedtime I asked her if she knew why no stories - she definitely did, so maybe the message will get through.

Right - time for tea, but want to say a massive thanks to Rubes, LadyT and Summer for the very generous pressies and clothes, it's amazing how she looks much more comfortable in clothes that actually fit! We did get one pack of "newborn" vests from John Lewis but they're way too huge still, despite saying Weight up to 7lbs. Will put them all aside to be posted on to next mum that needs them :)

oh and also, does anyone want a couple of bottles of Philosophy bath foam? I got a three-pack for xmas and two of the 'flavours' hazelnut espresso and hot buttered rum smell way too sweet for me, would be happy to send them to anyone with a sweet bathtime tooth :)

Right I'm going to get myself sorted and send stuff over the next few days I still have pressies for littleLady, tinyspot and newJJ, I've got to hurry or it will be teenyWG and babyJB too.

Oh and Trace that was so nice of you to type all that out, I'm going to use some of that. we had been using the touching and using veg but haven't for a while. Will check out that website too.

Lots of good news today girls ? my friends poorly baby has been allowed to go home with them today So despite the heart troubles and breathing and feeding difficulties she?s obviously a super strong little girl. Hurrah . And I?ve also heard from another good friend who tells me she?s expecting DC2, due in August. Such a happy day!

Blimey Beans, I can?t believe your DD2 is saying Mama already, DD has only just mastered it!

Yay for the approaching ?discharge? for DD2 Jump

Right, I have packing to do as DH and I are going on our swanky trip to London this weekend and DD is taking a slightly less swanky trip to my parents, so lots of bags to pack

That's lovely for your friends, ZJ, hurray! Also I should tell you that my special treat is a night out in Soho on Saturday I am having to spend the day at my storage in the day and am returning early Sunday morn, but there we are. Have a lovely, lovely time, can't wait to hear about it and I will not force you to meet me for coffee on your romantic weekend.

And Jam have a lovely time in NY too, how super.

Sorry, Avo, that DD1 seems so troubled. SHe is so new at school, though, it's probably all a bit of a safety value, to kick off at home.

JJ, I am superglad you got the parcel, hurrah. I was just the same as we needed the tiddly things for DD2 as she was the same weight as your DD2.

Rubes, I hope you are not on as you are having a lovely cheerful night with your DH for his birthday. Hope you can find some clarity on the hols. Oh, by the way, we have hired car seats abroad (in Europe). It was fine. Never used a 'strange' babysitter but have left DD1 with trusted friend a couple of times (but two people not familiar to her) and she was absolutely fine.

Oh, I was bathing DD1 last night and she has various cups and rubbish in the bath with her, as they do. She handed me a cup and instead of saying "Cup of coffee?" she said "Glass of wine, Mummy?"

Trace, that is kind of you to post that stuff. Best of British for tomorrow.

Vag, that is so sweet, you playing those songs to DS2. Aww. I was doing something similar with DD1 the other day. But whenever I put the stereo on she wants The Snowman music on whilst I "fly" her around the room It's no joke doing that for four mins as she likes to be held aloft.

Beans, that is very cute about your DD2. Wow, that is early! DD1 still calls me Lady about 30% of the time

Hope you are having a good night out, DB. I am very excited as I have two nights out this week - pictures with DP on Friday after we have been to some awful work drinks thing for him, then abovementioned trip out on Sat night. Woohoo!

LadyT you don't know how tempted I am to meet you for a coffee and a chat in real life, especially as I feel I know so few of you in person, it would be a proper treat to put a face to a name. Hmmm, now what I can persuade DH that he'd like to do for an hour ...

DD loves to fly too, and even more loves to be spun round until she's really dizzy and falls over. However that always ends with the spinner also getting dizzy, how it hasn't ended like a game of twister, or at the very least with vomiting I don't know

Ah, well even if it's a half hour I will be at my club at 67 Dean Street (makes it sound a lot grander than it is, I have to say) from quite early evening as I am meeting a friend but could be around earlier. I will FB you my mobile number just in case you have a few minutes and it would be lovely to see you, but SERIOUSLY, no pressure (and you know, your DH is welcome to come for coffee/a wine, I absolutely promise to behave myself). But it is entirely reasonable to expect you to want to spend every moment with him alone as it is your special weekend.

Will do my best, but I think this will be a very incomplete catch up.

kiwi - sorry you sound at the end of your tether. DS had a very tantrummy couple of weeks at the start of the year - turned out he needed antibiotics.

Spot - hope things are a bit better

LadyT - I just got my first scrip for the pill again in years. As you know, I am similarly aged and considerably lardier than you are. The GP seemed pretty relaxed about it as my blood pressure was perfectly healthy. So if that is your preferred option then go for it. Glad you have a fun week ahead.

Trace - hope tomorrow goes well for you

SL - we took both kids to Denver for a week this time last year. It was surprisingly OK. If you are going for a sensible length of time, you'll have a great time. Have never been to Vancouver, but did go on a hiking trip near Seattle pre kids - was spectacular.

Rubes - on the same theme, have used babysitters in hotels 2-3 times. Hotels have actually been unhelpful - its normally been an agency someone local has pointed me to. Normally the people we got were great - older childminders etc who were pretty confident with the kids.

ZJ - yay for the good news. Friend of mine had a baby boy today, which is fab.

jj - glad for the impending discharge (ooh that sounds vaguely grim ) and that things are going OK

All fine here, just had a lot of random time in odd bits of the country for work. Had ridiculous bedtime this evening - was 9pm before both monkeys would settle down to bed. We'd converted DS's cot bed into a bed last weekend and he had lulled us into a false sense of security being great with it. This evening he thought it would be hilarious to run around out of bed and then sit on DD's head. Luckily (or unluckily) she thought it was funny too.