Totally's postgrads - you know who you are.

[Meita]

Totally's original thread was for TTC after MC. It continued long after Totally herself graduated, and is still going strong. Totally's grads was set up as a thread for pregnancy post MC - i.e. anyone who graduated from Totally's thread and anyone else who had experienced MC and was now pregnant. It, too, is still going strong.

Now, more and more of us have graduated from Totally's grads - including LouiseSH, whose Georgie was born asleep. I suppose that makes us postgrads. We have travelled together for a long time and would like to stay in touch, but the pregnancy post MC thread is starting to get very big, and I think it should be allowed to keep its focus on pregnancy post MC. May it be as wonderful a place for support for current "members" as it was for us.

So this thread is a place for us to keep in touch, share experiences, and provide support.

(This is the first time ever I'm starting a thread - hope it works out...)

Helllloooooooooooooooooooo!
Sorry the feeding is just totally time consuming and I have real trouble replying to posts on my phone. Girls weight is up nicely so I do have something to show for the sore nips! Saw BF counsellor last week who tweaked how they latch and they are much better at feeding but still on and off which just makes me bloody sore as me (.)(.)s never get a rest (they have their own boob!) I am topping up with formula too so my poor DD1 gets look in. The time between feeds with twins goes so quickly I feel for you all who are dealing with growth spurts and cluster feeding, just when you think you have it under control BANG! it all kicks off again.

Gi1da hurray for the baby gym and bouncer. We have so many twin things you can't move! I need to sort it out!

Need to do the school run.........I will continue later and I WILL catch up with all of you x

Hi all,
happygirl re: weaning, I think the only strict advice is not to start before 17 weeks. As I see it though, I'd wait for the WHO-recommended 6 months unless your baby shows clear signs of being ready for weaning, or unless pragmatic reasons create necessities. The advantage of waiting would be that you skip the puree phase and can go straight into BLW and fingerfood and self-feeding if you so wish. At 4 months, you have little choice but to go with purees.
There can of course be good reasons to start weaning earlier than 6 months. Mainly I'd say, if you feel your baby is ready for weaning and they are showing the proper signs. Why wait if it seems the right time now? There is no harm in starting weaning anytime between 17 and 26 weeks. (The WHO recommendation is not really based on much evidence. There's no evidence to show that it is wrong, either.)
That said, it's worth reading up on what really are the signs that your baby is ready. Babies waking up hungry in the night after previously having slept through is NOT a sign that they are ready for weaning. On the contrary, milk gives them much more nourishment and calories, so giving them more solids and less milk would just make them MORE hungry. Good signs for weaning readyness are for instance: sitting up by themselves; showing great interest in your food and trying to grab it; ability to pick objects up and put them into mouth.
All that said, I started giving I. solids at about 20 weeks. He did sort of grab a piece of tangerine out of my hand and eat it. That gave him diarrhea. So I gave him banana to counteract, but he wouldn't eat it by himself, so I mashed it up and spoon-fed it to him. At 20 weeks he clearly wasn't ready for BLW so after having kind of stumbled into weaning, he got purees for lunch from then on, and from about 5 months onwards we let him play with BLW style food for dinner. Which went quite well. It's fun to see him developing his fine motor skills whilst exploring various tastes and textures, though he doesn't actually eat very much in the evenings.

Ok after that weaning essay let me just also say that I hope your dark days stay isolated rare occurrences. It can be tough sometimes, i feel for you. Does it happen to you when you are particularly exhausted? Are there any triggers you can identify?

Oh and regarding the renewed middle-of-the-night waking: Have you considered it might be the notorious 4-months sleep regression? (Which can be really tough, but the good thing about it is that it passes, and it explains why you suddenly have such a difficult time of things again; it's got nothing to do with your parenting, it's just a natural developmental thing.)

Hi all hope the growth spurts are under control now?!

magic didn't realise you were still bfing- wow!!

tfls lovely to hear from you!

happy agree with meitas advice, look for cues. Starting at around 17 weeks means you can introduce things very slowly, start with a little bit of baby rice and if she doesnt like it leave it for a few weeks and then try again.

samflowers it's amazing what you learn to do one handed isn't it? Hope you've got both hands free tonight (and aren't missing your baby cuddles too much)

I am feeling a lot better, still dizzy though. Ds2 has a cold and is very snuffly. Nasosal saline drops have been great at clearing his nose enough to feed though.

Meita thanks so much for your advice on weaning, I really appreciate you taking the time to write it all that's just so kind. It's so hard to know re the weaning, ideally i'd like to wait another little while. I've only just bought the books to read up on it, haven't got a steamer etc etc I dunno I just had in my head that I had at least another month before this was going to happen so I think I'm going to try and hang on, I just don't like depriving her of anything.. she has all of those symptoms you have mentioned above aside from grabbing food out of our hands etc however we don't usually eat in front of her now that I think about it.. Anyhow going to wait and see if I can for at least another few weeks, she is only 17 weeks on Friday so it's too early anyhow. Thanks so much for all of the advice.

She is super constipated today the poor little thing and sooo tired, she has her 16 week injections tomorrow so lots going on.

Gilda so glad to hear you are feeling better.. I am totally grand 90% of the time and then when I get down it just seems horrendous for anything up to a day and I just feel totally worthless and then really guilty I was down and then grand again. I've been fine though since last week when it happened so hopefully that's it. DH is so so patient.

Magic huge big congrats I just think you are totally amazing having twins and being able to feed them yourself etc, I totally admire you .. well done so much! What age is DD1?

Hi to everyone else, shattered here been up since 5.30 am and got to do a thing for my younger brother now busy busy

Hi everyone- sorry haven't been posting but appreciate you all asking after me. Have an appt today with the consultant re Ns tongue tie so hoping it will be sorted then. Not looking forward to going but keep telling myself it will be worth it if he can feed better. He tries so hard at the moment but it's clearly hard for him as he falls asleep when he feeds all the time, then needs to feed again really soon, my nipples don't get a break etc etc. Failed to express enough yesterday to give him at 11 which is when he gets particularly frantic and won't latch on at all, gave him formula and for the second time had an hour of crying after- think it's wind despite many burps!!

Sorry all about me- will catch up properly later and let you know how it goes

yawn do babies have growth spurts at 7 1/2 months (i.e. ... wait a minute ... 32 weeks I think)

I. went to sleep normally soon after 7, woke for feeding just before 10, again just after midnight, then once in the middle of the night when I didn't check the time, then again around 6. That's two more feeds than normal for us.

Or does it have something to do with us trying to drop the middle-of-the-night feed? He realised what we were trying to do and is now hanging on to the night feeds all the more fiercely?!

There's not supposed to be another sleep regression until 9 months, right?

tired wave to everyone

I was feeding every hour and three quarters from 1am last night... And have had major howlywails all this evening (and DH is away)... I'm so not rested or ready if he feeds as much tonight.
Wouldn't it be nice if we could book a couple of days annual leave from this job, around about now... I could well do with a bit of R&R.

I'll second that Alba, sleep is going backwards here not getting better. We appear to be up to 3 feeds in the night again, but I'm sure part of that is me running out of steam to settle her and just offering a boob to solve it. Last night she woke up farting about seven times... I don't know what to do, I'm just so exhausted.

I'm happy with my feeding choice, but this is another thing they should tell you... annual leave just isn't really a possibility.

Just to put it in perspective TMT, I was more tired with DS1 (FF from a week old) despite a night off a week and fewer night feeds, because getting up to go to the kitchen and make up a bottle woke me much more, settling was harder and then I took ages to fall asleep again. Just getting out a boob as and when required plus lovely sleepy feeding hormones is much much easier in my experience... Though I'll still be moaning about how tired I am

Oh, and DH being completely off the hook for night duty means he's taken on loads of other household jobs very willingly as he's quite grateful for his unbroken sleep, which is great for me

Northern how's things now post Tongue tie fix? Hope it's improving, though I must say even without problems we had long evenings cluster feeding early on. It was relentless and at times I thought he must have emptied me completely, though did find he still preferred boob to formula (we were on top ups to help weight gain but didn't last long).
I found the easiest way to express was in the morning (supply best) whilst feeding baby the other side (rugby ball hold). Seems tough to start with to latch on baby then pump, but with pillows strategically positioned you soon get the hang of it. And it does help increase your supply too.
Thinking of you, it's tough at first (we lost well over a pound and didn't regain birth weight till 5 weeks...). Hang in there!

Meita my first little boy didn't sleep through for a long time. I think once I was back at work he got in the habit of waking to get cuddles from me... Eventually I found no cry sleep solution tecnhiques worked best for us. You're by no means alone.

samflowers lovely to see you back

Buffs and Gilda, hope the sunshine making you both happy!
After one night on my own with both boys I have renewed huge respect for you Buffy

waves to Clare, muser and happy

rhg and dorcas and sparkly where are you?
Hope feeding getting easier Dorcas and motherhood becoming more fun for you.

Who else? I'll remember after I post when Brian taps me on the shoulder and laughs at my lack of any kind of memory just now

Is Lia here yet? Looking forward to a new recruit.

northern how did it go?

Should have logged on last night- sounds like we were all up!! T has got a cold and keeps on coughing up snotsick still - Uggh. I think my letdown has gone a bit bonkers as he's feeding really quickly now (10mins) but will then scream and twist and mouth at my boob like he wants more but it's causing him pain... Even after winding... I eventually give him his dummy and he seems v happy just sucking ferociously on his dummy- strange child. he woke up more than usual last night and preferred to snack today, but I think that is probably because he is finding it hard to feed and breathe

meita it's so frustrating when they start waking up again, especially as you no longer have the magic hormones in your body that help you cope with night waking - they go at 6months I think. If it continues you might want to look at upping his solids at supper time? That can sometimes help? Or it could be that he's just working out that if he wakes up he gets a lovely cuddle with mummy and bonus boob! A way to check that is to see how hungry he is for his breakfast, if he's not that fussed then you can assume he might not need so many of the night feeds and is waking or reasons other than hunger - hope this helps a bit and isn't completely garbled!

Hi everyone.

Had Ns Tongue tie snipped on Wed lunchtime- really glad we went privately as cut down the amount of time we had to wait at the clinic- he was still starving though as hadn't been fed for 1.5 hours! Although the procedure is v quick and he didn't cry much more than he already was I found it v stressful. He was really unsettled for the rest of the day, wanting to feed pretty much constantly. It hasn't been in instant fix I'd hoped but think we need to relearn breastfeeding. He also has oral thrush which explains my ongoing pain feeding him, so that's not helping either! We've been to a bf cafe and will go to another next week.

Thanks to everyone for asking after us.

Sorry to hear lots of you are sleep deprived again

Gah! Fell for the old smear test trick. I TOLD the gp I didn't think you should have one until 12weeks post partum after reading about it on here (can't remember who had similar experience) but she booked me in anyway. Turned up and nurse refused to do it until 12 weeks - arrgh.

Got a big lecture about contraception instead and had my bloods done for iron count and also to send off for the breakthrough breast cancer generations study. Am now sitting under a tree with baby in the pram enjoying the sunshine

Hi, just a quick post. I'm still about but not had much time to post. The feeding is much better thanks Alba and yes, I am enjoying things a lot more now I am not in so much pain. Plus we have had some good nights sleeps recently which always helps! However, whilst we are back on track with the breastfeeding, Little Dorcas is now suffering terribly from wind, and feeding is a bit of a struggle in that respect. Poor thing, it us heartbreaking to see her in pain and I feel quite helpless. Anyone got any good ideas for relieving wind/ getting the wind up. We're trying gripewater but how the hell do you get that down a crying baby?
Northern Goldilocks, I have been through a similar experience with my LO. Posterior TT, which we got snipped but no overnight results, as she had learned to latch on 'badly'. Also had thrush which was AGONY. But... four weeks on from the snip, the thrush finally cleared up with the meds, although that took over two weeks, and her latch is vastly improved. BF is now mostly pain free. So hang on in there, if you want to keep bf, it will get better. I had a week of expressing and bottle feeding which gave my nipples a break when the thrush was at it's worst.
Hi to everyone else, got to run but will be back on soon.

PS Also another little name change!

Thanks dorcas- it's good to hear and glad you've been able to get bf sorted. From what I hear posterior tt is more difficult but glad you've been able to relearn bf. We're persevering and I'm hopeful he'll improve. He's much happier today so hoping we're turning a corner

Oh and re wind- I find holding him upright and bouncing on the birthing ball works quite well

Good morning everyone, I hope the sun is shining for you wherever you are, and that you had a good night's rest. Even if sleep wasn't so great a bit of sunshine makes it all a bit easier doesn't it?

Clarea DOH! re bloody NHS and their daft smearations! I have to book mine in. I will almost miss the constant reminder letters (not). How's T's cold. Hope(1) the snuffles are on the way out.

(1)Wft is going on with apple spellcheck? It is determined to change 'cold hope' to 'colopeNope'. Waaay to early in the morning for that sort of shinanigans!

How's the growth spurt feeding for Alba and Toomt? R seems to have slowed down again so back to the 11pm, 4am, 7am routine which suits me just fine. He's also now taken to having a nap in our bed with me after the morning feed. Still sleep-snorkling next to me now but think he will wake pretty soon then be super sparky and want entertaining.

Respect going out to DorcasB and Northern for perseverence with bf under conditions of extreme ouchiness. I really don't think I could have got through that myself. Hope things settle down for you really soon Northern so you can just get on with enjoying miniNorth.

Magic at realising the double impact on stuff for you! Blimey! I have so far been espousing a policy of less-is-more but let's see how long till I'm living in a plastic soup of primary colours and trippable over things which make noises and flash lights as I fall over them.

SpringSamB how's life in the new house?

Meita how's it going with the childminder?

Oi Buffs how's you?

Okeydokes my time is up, big wave to all I've missed. Things going well here. I feel a meeeellion times better since not taking that bloody pill so life is good. Off for a walk in the park before it gets too hot and bright wow, what a joy to be saying that!

Love to all, and an extra big hug for Lia

DorcasB I was going to ask about getting gripewater down too, just started trying it this week. So far my only success has been to dribble it in while he is yelling. Any other method just had him spitting it out again. Trying to juggle holding wriggly baby in one hand, spoonful of slightly sticky liquid in the other has lead to me having quite a bit of the stuff myself. Have ended up licking it off his chin / neck to minimise dribblespits on the sofa. First time mum. Let's see how long that lasts. Presumably I should buy a washable throw?

Gripe water- get a syringe from pharmacy and then you just squirt it in gentlyand they think it's milk and swallow it down.
Also worksfor delivery of pink medicine and antibiotics if needed!

Was just going to say syringe too... J has now learnt what it is and sucks so hard the plunger flies in, cue much spluttering. Now she loves it so much she will also take it from a spoon, but a syringe is by far the easiest. GP gave me ours with her free Calpol!

Feeding has settled thanks Gi1da, and only fed at 10, 3 and 6.15 last night (we had gone back up to 3 feeds a night for a few nights), although she still woke on 3 other occasions because of the wind. They are proper (as I would have said at primary school) trumps... so loud! I'm really hoping she grows out of this soon. We are now co-sleeping all night, which is fine but there's not really space. I went to reach for her dummy in the night and the pins and needles were so bad my arm just thumped on the bed like a dead weight.

Good to see you back Dorcas, I agree you and Northern are absolute heroes for sticking with it. And like a proper teacher I've checked my register and think you've been MIA too long Unbuffy, how are you? Glad coming off the pill seems to have worked Gi1da.

I think we need to prepare a soft cheese platter... I think Ivy is on her way.

Enjoy this gorgeous weather everyone!

Thinking of LouiseSh, Georgie and family today.
xxx

Clarea, Toomt aaaaaaah yes of course! Thank you!

at the thought of little J and the plunger!

Thanks Gilda , thanks for remembering.We re off to our "special" place with some flowers and to scatter some of Georgie's ashes.The rest of her went in the paperweight and are to be scattered in a park near my mum and dads.XXXX