Totally's postgrads - you know who you are.

[Meita]

Totally's original thread was for TTC after MC. It continued long after Totally herself graduated, and is still going strong. Totally's grads was set up as a thread for pregnancy post MC - i.e. anyone who graduated from Totally's thread and anyone else who had experienced MC and was now pregnant. It, too, is still going strong.

Now, more and more of us have graduated from Totally's grads - including LouiseSH, whose Georgie was born asleep. I suppose that makes us postgrads. We have travelled together for a long time and would like to stay in touch, but the pregnancy post MC thread is starting to get very big, and I think it should be allowed to keep its focus on pregnancy post MC. May it be as wonderful a place for support for current "members" as it was for us.

So this thread is a place for us to keep in touch, share experiences, and provide support.

(This is the first time ever I'm starting a thread - hope it works out...)

Hi Northern, I wouldn't worry about him sleeping for longer after the formula, it doesn't mean he's not getting enough when you bf, and so long as he's putting on weight he's fine. Lots of tongue ties on here too (weirdly so in fact... or is it not?) who I'm sure will be able to give you more advice than me. But I'm still feeding every 1 1/2 - 2 hours through the day at 10 weeks, so hourly at your point is ok, and it really does get easier.

Gi1da, right, next time you disappear for a few days I'm going to start badgering... don't keep it in, come and tell us about it. I think we're all having those feelings, and I can't help thinking that it might be worse when getting to this point has been that bit more difficult, because of the guilt that it brings when you're anything less than delighted. But it is definitely normal. And if you're not getting any better do go to your GP. We have missed your updates, do come chat.

Thanks for the advice Alba, I wedged a pillow between my knees last night which definitely helped. Still very numb arms though. I woke up at one point in a blind panic having turned over... oh the stresses. OF course J was fine. Luckily I'm only putting her into bed at the point where she won't resettle (last night 3.30am) so I'm only doing one feed lying down and avoiding the swap. I'm not sure about putting her in the middle as DH is quite a heavy sleeper and frequently whallops me (by mistake).

Clare has your dizziness cleared up? And Muser hope the feeding frenzy has settled, good work on the weight gain. Good news on the childminder front Meita, must be lovely to get a bit of time to do something else and Unbuffy I'm glad you're finding moving J into his own room is helping.

Right... must go. She's asleep in my wrap on me, which is lovely. I just wish she could keep it going through the night.

Hi northern glad you've had the Tongue tie diagnosed - you've had a really tough time by the sounds of it, but it will get better!! Growth spurts are at around 3, 6 and 12 weeks. It sounds very much like a growth spurt that you've just experienced, a day where you just have to resign yourself to being pinned to the sofa while your milk supplies catch up with demand. Let us know what the weigh in tomorrow reveals- it sounds like he is gaining well.

I am feeling lots better after 2 day bug, just sore throat and glands up a bit. Still getting dizzy spells though.

gi1da how are you doing?

Thanks for the welcome back :)

Well, we seem to have hit the 12 week growth spurt a week late, suddenly lots of night feeds again and taking more than usual from them too! So tired and DH doesmost some of the night wake ups.... A doing well, very active and very strong, current favourite activity is trying to sit up by himself and attempting to go from his 90 degree roll all the way over (he's managed it once so far, front to back). Weight has dropped off though, he was 94th centile at birth and is now down to about 50th. Rationally I know that's probably about right for him (me and DH are about average) and he's had several colds and is bloody teething already so doesn't always feed well (and has always been a bit inept at it which is why we're bottle feeding!) , but it still makes me a little teeny tiny bit concerned

Meita, finding childminders is a nightmare isn't it! We're trying to sort one at the moment but I'm still in the process of negotiating days with work as well (going back 3 days a week). Hope yours works out.

Gilda hugs

Hello you lovely lot. Thank you for hand holding. I had a good chat with DH about how I was feeling, which has cleared some air (he thought I was pissed off with him and was tense, so we were both rubbing each other up the wrong way on top of everything else). I am feeling much better the last couple of days since admitting I wasn't feeling great, so that has really helped. I feel like I used to occasionally with PMT - getting utterly indignantly outraged by something to the point of Extreme Ranting, then next day getting my period, feeling totally zen but rather embarrassed and mystified as to what all the fuss was about. Did occur to me it might be a reaction to the pill I started taking 4 weeks ago rather pointlessly but the Doc seemed quite insistent on contraception as I am also feeling a little dizzy.

Well good grief, just back from another feed and he has finally gone to sleep so must make some lunch pronto. It's taken about 2 hours to type this so far and I haven't even responded to anyone!

Pretty shocked at how common the tongue tie seems to be given by the experiences here, you'd think they would alert people more to it, I'd never even heard of it before.

Aggh, can hear snorkling already. Will try to catch up on mini screen later, but yet again, I want to say you are all fab and thanks x

Gilda you remind me of a very similar reaction to the pill I had way back when I was twenty... Horribly PMT like symptoms and dreadful dizziness. I went back to the (middle aged, male) GP whose response was 'but it's working isn't it?'. Very unhelpful. I stopped taking it anyway and took myself off to the family planning clinic instead, and felt better immediately. Tried a few different ones till we got one that wasn't too bad, but I haven't taken the pill for years now and certainly wouldn't want to risk it just now. Similarly I cancelled my appointment for a mirena coil once i'd read that some women react to the progestogen in that too...

If I were you I'd stop taking it now, then hopefully life will look a great deal brighter again.

Sparkly thanks for the reminder about 12 week growth spurt... I guess that's why it's got very frequent again all of a sudden. Right now he's tied into my moby feeding to sleep... It was that or me tied to the sofa all afternoon! Amazed by quite how easy it was too...

Now, since I have my hands free, time to tidy up here and get ready for Lia arriving... Any more bunting left Clareanna?

must catch up with you all this weekend............at some point!! Hope you are all well.

Ah Alba that is very interesting. Will stop taking them and see if I start feeling better. Definitely rather light headed again today, which is not good when carrying a baby round a house which is mainly stairs.

Can't believe R will be 12 weeks tomorrow, on one hand it feels like he can't possibly be that old (though he is now enormous and I have the aching arms as witness), on the other hand I can't imagine him ever not being here and part of our little tribe.

Hoping everyone is enjoying a little sunshine today.

Buffs, Toomt did you manage to get some sleep?

Special hugs to Lia xx

Very red faced TFLS making an embarrassed reappearance!

Sorrry for being MIA for so long. Life has been manic. Charlie was 6 months this week, been working from home for the last few months around him and struggled to find enough time to post.

Hope you all have a lovely day tomorrow and will endeavour to catch up properly soon.

Love to you all.

Happy mothers day everyone!!!

I'm cooking for 10... How did that happen?!

Happy mothers day! :) :) :)

DP did the night shift for me last night in honour of mothers day. And although I. only took a few sips from the cup when he woke in the middle of the night, he went back to sleep all without me and boob. I think mothers day should happen at least once per week ;)

Wow Meita that's a fantastic mothers day present!
Mine's not so good, the cold I thought had gone is back with a vengeance, X is definitely on 12 wk growth spurt feeding every 2 hours at least, DH has work deadlines so is trying to help me out but the worried look on his face says he'd rather be prepping for the workshops he has to run tomorrow and Tuesday... And X was (very rare occurence) howlywailing from midnight till 1am. And I'm worrying about DS1's preschool. Expensive (even with funding) and their EYFS assessments for him that I read at parents evening were way off the mark, implying they don't really know him, just pigeon holing him into standard for his year group (he's early Sept and bright, so he's quite a way ahead of his year group). Boss lady was trying to justify by reference to the fact he doesn't go to school for another 18 months. I see that as no reason to assess him incorrectly! Grrrrr. I see nursery as useful merely for social interaction as he does tons of learning at home and with his childminder, nevertheless this is a very overpriced social club if they don't know him well enough to accurately assess him. Our CM's Ofsted inspector the other week did a better job of assessing him in the 2 hours she was there! So, nursery is to get a term's notice. An unpleasantness I could well do without. And fingers crossed we can get a few sessions at the virtually free (with funding) preschool at the local church. Only snag is I won't know about places till June. But I'm guessing my money better spent on dance classes, swimming lessons and mini rugby sessions than on his current nursery. I didn't think things like this would be such a minefield so soon.....

Started this post ages ago... I wonder how many x-posts I'll have missed...

And my youngest stepdaughter just gave me a gorgeous handmade card, some lovely chocs and an incredibly touching message. So sweet of her.

Huge hugs for Louise today, if you're reading.

Meita all I will say is . DH tried to do the early night shift on Sat when J woke immediately after being put in her basket. He sat with her from 10.30 til 12.15 during which time he fell asleep with her on his knees, and then when she woke up he got in a right faff and let her get all wound up so in the end I fed her and co-slept. Not so much actually doing the nightshift! Still at least he has renewed admiration for my patience and stamina.

Alba sounds like you're having a bit of a mare... I hope it gets sorted soon for you. I'm right in thinking you keep X in the sling all evening yes? I hope so because it makes me feel better that I'm still doing the same... when is she going to sleep on her own in the evening??? Or night for that matter! Gi1da does something magical happen at 12 weeks?

Had a lovely mothers day, weirdly exactly a year since my LMP... what a year! Hope you all enjoyed yours too.

Welcome back TFLS, looking forward to catching up on your news.

Went to Mothercare yesterday to get one of the Calma bottles I was looking at and decided to get 3-6month sleepsuits. Every single girls' set was pink. So for the second time running she is in boy ones... helicopters and dinosaurs, much more fun. It's not like I'm trying to make some anti-pink statement, I just don't want her to be a "princess", I want some choice! Grrr... rant over.

Have a lovely day all

TMT, yes, either in the sling or in bed with me in the evening. I'd managed to feed him to sleep and leave him in bed for a few baby free hours a couple of times last week, then the growth spurt hit....... I'm probably a bad example though as I'm making no effort re either routine or sleeping in his cot... It'll happen when it happens. Can you tell he's my last baby?

We've just had 12 wk jabs. Surprisingly less screaming than last time. And fast asleep now (in the sling of course)... Either it'll be a bad night or lots and lots of sleep... I'm hoping for the latter!

Do you think Lia will pop in and see us if I leave some lovely cakes on the table here?

Hmm 12 weeks, yup from today he is going to sleep through the night, change his own nappies and help around the house. That's right isn't it?

We have had a great step forward in the last couple of days, he started getting more interested in things so I went to Ikea and bought a baby gym thing (plywood arch with things hanging off it) - he slaps the bits about and keeps himself amused for 15 mins or so at a time. Also coincided with the first time I've been able to put him in a baby chair / bouncer thing without him screaming his head off. So overnight I've gone from perma-velcro baby to one who will sit in a bouncer amusing himself. OMG I can make tea and go to the toilet on my own, the luxury! Possibly the best £20 I ever spent!

Wowed that MiniSparkles (welcome back btw!) is trying to sit. R misread that page of the baby manual and has instead learnt to spit.

Welcome back also to TFLS. How's life at 6 months? Any survival tips on home working with mini-company? I considered doing a few hours freelance but it's too hard to find time to concentrate at the moment. That and I just can't be arsed

Respect to MrMeita and nice try MrToomt

Alba hope X takes the jabs in his stride today, we have our second lot in a fortnight, I must be lagging behind a bit. Still undecided about the BCG. Your preschool issues sound a bit of a nightmare, certainly doesn't sound like they have the individual awareness of your child that they should. Not good enough indeed! Really sticking my head in the sand about all that. I know nothing about how it works or what we will do

Northern how are you settling in, feeding going better?

Magic how are those gorgeous double darlings doing?

Waves to Buffs, hope you are feeling better Clarea

When is Louisesh going to pop in and say hello?? [nudge][nudge]

Primps bunting, adds new place name Lia to the table and plumps cushion on newest chair.

Hellos and howdos to everyone!!

Hello all, commiserations on growth spurts and non-sleepy babies.

My baby is currently fast asleep in her bouncy chair. This is bliss as recently she's decided daytime naps are rubbish and she doesn't want them. I want her to have some more daytime naps that don't involve me pushing her in the pram/walking with her in the sling. If nothing else, I need to get the garden sorted out for summer. If she won't sit quietly or nap I'll never do it. Don't think I can garden with her in the sling!

She's sleeping well at night as well, but doesn't usually go down until 11pm/midnight, and cluster feeds up until then. But as she'll then sleep for 4-5 hours straight I figure it's a good trade off.

Hi Everyone,

Very quick message to say that I've not had internet working properly since I moved but have read from time to time. Thank you to those who have wondered how and where I was. I will try to catch up properly soon and post a 'proper' message. Also thinking of a name change if anyone has any clever ideas..?!

Hope all very well, SB x

DH - Does she need a nappy change?

Me - I don't know darling, you're holding her, does she smell like she needs changing?

Seriously how would they cope without us!?!

Welcome back SamB, nice to see some oldies back (no offence!)

Oooh what a lot of excess s, preview toomuch*, preview!

Oh wait, it does it for you across a sentence now, no need for so many *s, must remember that.

I'll go now.

Hi!

I am so excited to sit down with my computer without a babe in arms to read and actually be able to respond to some of the posts ! I may well be on borrowed time however so I'll make a start and see how we go...

In my excitement I've only scanned a few of the above posts - I think Alba and TooMuch are having trouble with babies and evenings? So, at five and a half months this is the first evening that R has slept for any length of time without being in my arms. I have held her while she sleeps/wakes/feeds for all that time. Last week I had a real 'thing' about it and started to feel a bit inadequate that my baby didn't sleep in her own bed for ten hours in a row as the books said a six month old baby should. Oh and a bit inadequate that she quite likes to feed half the night too. I thought about lots of different solutions and in the end googled on my phone. I read some really interesting information from another baby site (can't remember which one now) which made me feel a million times better - it made me realise that what I am doing is ok. I have loved holding my wonderful baby while she slept - I still do, and the bond we have is fantastic. I also love co-sleeping and don't want to change that anytime soon. So, what I did tonight was the usual bathtime routine and then I fed her lying down in our bed like I do in the night and she went to sleep. I cleared the bed of all pillows and duvet and left her to sleep. You won't bloody believe it but she's still there!!! And I am here posting on mn! Trying to put her down in the unfamiliar crib or cot was, I guess, too different. She's been there for nearly two hours. I ate dinner with both hands. I might even get to have a bath - on my own!

Everything is going very well here, some ups and downs just like everyone else. I am having surgery to remove the cyst in two weeks so am expressing milk ready. I am still terrified of the whole thing but am trying not to think of it at the moment. We have also just about started weaning, slightly earlier than I had hoped but needs must. A combination of very frequent feeding overnight, slow weight gain, the surgery and a very interested baby made me realised that I didn't need to wait two more weeks. It's going ok, she seems to quite like food in general. Because I am expressing milk for bottles during surgery time I mixed rice with formula today. I feel horrid even writing that I did it. It is possible that she will ultimately (in July) have a combination of formula and breast when I go back to work but I am really hoping not. I will have to see if I get any better at expressing. My boobs don't perform for pumps . The new house is fabulous and everything we had wanted it to be - DD1 (the noisy teenaged hormonal one) can be having a tantrum upstairs and downstairs we can't hear it. Result.

Although I haven't posted regularly for a while I do read all of your posts. This is such a lovely thread and I love that we all have babies of different ages and at different stages. I hope you all have a peaceful evening and with any luck R will sleep on her own tomorrow night too so I can post again!

Hi - Sam again...just trying out a new name. R still asleep. Cannot believe it. This is brilliant!

Hi everyone, we have been in Ireland for the last 2 weeks and my internet on phone wasnt' working so just catching up now. Really hope you are all well. We had a really really lovely time and baby was as good as gold, so so so much fun. She is desperately trying to roll from side onto tummy, can go from back to side but getting on to tummy is not happening yet, it's cute watching! I did have a rather bad day though last week (see below)

Sparkly Hi welcome back! How are you doing?

Gilda how are you doing?

I have to admit I'm having similar worries, I've had another day of not wanting to be happy, seeing no point to being here, thinking baby and DH would be better off without me, then snapping out of it the next day and feeling horrendously guilty. It's been at least a month since I had this before last Monday but just a bit worried that maybe it is pnd.. i was warned by a friend of mine (a MW) that I had such a 'bad' (not that i know any different) labour that i would be at risk of pnd but i just feel so so so lucky and happy 99% of the time and just super super lucky that i don't see how I could but yet then that day really freaks me out cos it's not at all like me to be like that. Sorry this is all me me me.

Meita I hope the childminder goes well. We are definitely thinking of going with a CM also if possible, just need to find someone now although I have some time yet I guess. Hope it goes well for you.

Unbuffy glad you are feeling better with J in his own room etc that's great.

Anyone any advice when to wean? I went to a weaning class yesterday and they said no sooner than 6 months but little C is feeding great, had been sleeping through the night for a good while now but now is waking at 5 absolutely ravenous, i don't mind at all at all feeding her then but feel a bit bad cos then she gets cranky she hasn't had enough sleep etc, she definitely prefers to sleep through until morning but because she is hungry she can't so i just dont know what to do. She is 17 weekson Friday so I was thinking of doing some baby rice next week but dont want to do anything wrong either. Tricky Tricky.

northern hope the feeding is going a bit better now? You are doing great to be feeding, it's tough sometimes

samb best of luck with your op - i had the same op about 4 years ago, it's tough but the relief from pain is great

okay feeding time here!

I'm pinned to the sofa, 5 feeds since 7am and every two hours last night, I think the 12 week growth spurt has hit early.

Oh Happy so sorry to hear you've had feelings like that too, it's just horrid to go through. I found that talking about it helped, though of course you may not feel like talking when you're in the midst of it. Writing it down may help vent your feelings at those times. I am feeling so much better the last day or so since I stopped taking the prog-only pill, but am keeping an eye on myself.

Lovely to see SpringFlowers hope you had a quiet night after R's solo-sleepy evening. at the novelty of two handed eating. I shall put bunting out the day I feel confident enough to cook spaghetti!

Waves to all x

Toomt we have the same milk marathon going on here. At least he's sleeping loads between courses!