Totally's postgrads - you know who you are.

[Meita]

Totally's original thread was for TTC after MC. It continued long after Totally herself graduated, and is still going strong. Totally's grads was set up as a thread for pregnancy post MC - i.e. anyone who graduated from Totally's thread and anyone else who had experienced MC and was now pregnant. It, too, is still going strong.

Now, more and more of us have graduated from Totally's grads - including LouiseSH, whose Georgie was born asleep. I suppose that makes us postgrads. We have travelled together for a long time and would like to stay in touch, but the pregnancy post MC thread is starting to get very big, and I think it should be allowed to keep its focus on pregnancy post MC. May it be as wonderful a place for support for current "members" as it was for us.

So this thread is a place for us to keep in touch, share experiences, and provide support.

(This is the first time ever I'm starting a thread - hope it works out...)

Muser thinking of you, hope it all turns out to be a false alarm

TMT I stopped expressing once X was feeding well and gaining weight. Keep meaning to start again as he hasn't touched a bottle in nearly a month now and may well refuse... But I keep not getting round to it. Laziness (or just preserving my energy )

waves to everyone else. Typing whilst walking with baby in sling. X asleep now so I could go home but DH's ex wife due to pop round so it's more relaxing pacing the streets till the coast is clear - I really am doing anything for an easy life these days!

Clare DD1 is the same lol bad ankle and earache so we too have had requests for pink medicine and hot water bottles (although she now does have a horrible hacking cough which she has also passed to me). Well done with the expressing, TMT I haven't expressed either I have topped up with formula....I am spending so much time feeding the last thing I want to do is express....

Ok.....so I am only getting the chance to write half a post........will continue in the morning! Night ladies
x

Muser, sorry to hear your little one is unwell, hope you get things sorted out quickly.
Magic, I can't believe you are managing to breastfeed two, I think expressing on top of that would be nothing short of superhuman! I have just managed my first expressing session whilst holding my DD and am proud of that! I know it doesnt sound much but I'm seriously worried about how I am going to find time to express and look after a baby that isn't keen on being put down when my DP goes back to work next week.
Hope everyone else is well, and babies slept well last night. I got five hours in a row before she woke, woo! X

Hope all is well Muser, keep us posted xxx
Wow 5 hours whooop whooooooop Dorcas!

muser thinking of you

dorcas 5 hours?!

Well, today is my first proper home alone day as dh is away for work. Car wouldn't start so put ds2 in sling and took ds1 to nursery to be a pirate on the bus. Then decided to walk into town. Am now recovering on the sofa as I ache all over!!!

Thinking of you Muser

yay for the sleep Dorcas

I hope you're getting a decent long relax and nice sleepy baby Clare

having a lovely relaxing day myself... DH was working from home this morning so he got DS1 up and out to nursery whilst X and I stayed in bed till 9am! Bliss! And Newbies is back at the cinema so we went to see Chalet Girl (amusing chick flick... Not so bad given they're not allowed to show anything rated more than 12A). Thankfully X slept through most of it, though he rather enjoyed sitting on my knee watching the big bright pictures to start with!

I'd better do something useful now he's napping again... There's a big pile of laundry downstairs demanding attention.....

Hello all,

Muser - really hope your little one is feeling better. Actually the same goes for Clare and Magic - hope big bro and sis are recovering. The cold finally seems to have landed. C is snuffly and drippy and DH is miserable. Oh joy!

Meita - your expressing regime sounds good. I've been thinking about expressing and freezing/using. We're happy just as we are, but it would be nice to know that there is a supply should we need it. Toomt and Alba - I've also been really lax at expressing. We did it a couple of times and she took the bottle quite easily, but I'm worried if I leave it too long she'll not want it and that defeats the objective in buying a pump. Last time I ended up being pretty unbalanced (boob-wise) so perhaps Meita has the right idea - just after the morning feed.

Dorcas - hope your little one gives you as much sleep tonight!

I'm spending my Friday night bidding for baby clothes on Ebay! What fun!

Hi and hugs to Buffy and Gilda

Thanks RHG, although it's not looking promising. She's been fed and changed and is wide awake!
Wishing everyone, peaceful nights!

muser any news?

RHG what goodies did you buy? I did midnight spending on boden the other night - am now regretting it! will send it all back I'm sure... keep on thinking "well if I've got 2 boys who'll wear these it's practically half price!!!" then buying more things for the baby...

We are definitely now on a 4 hour cycle at night - hurrah! But DS2 has developed little spots on both cheeks which I think is baby acne. Not helped by having a dummy either, but I can't go cold turkey as I have a lodger at the mo and need to keep the crying at night to a minimum!

WEnt to an adventure playground yesterday for DS2 and had to do 2 rounds of al fresco guerrila Bfing - what fun.

Morning Clare, no news yet. Don't think we'll get results until Monday as they normally take 2 working days. I'm hoping for the best though as the results from Weds came back on Thursday, so they must have grown something from the sample quickly. Not getting results quickly this time might mean they can't grow anything and she's in the clear. She still seems absolutely fine.

Fingers crossed muser, glad she's doing ok in herself at least.

Am a bit of your trip to Chatsworth clare, I'm from Derbyshire and can't wait to take J there when she's bigger, oooh the farm shop, lovely.

So I met owlbooty, I found an Oxford mn thread two days before they had planned a meet up, it's not really like me but I went and it was lovely. J was the only baby and it made me realise just how far we've come in 8 weeks. It was nice to meet some new people but also to reflect a bit by talking about it.

Thanks for all your expressing advice, and for making me not the only one who can't find time. Needless to say it's spent another week in the box!

Long time no hear gi1da and unbuff, hope you're both ok, and everyone else too, I've run out of oomph to namecheck!

I've had a go at expressing. Did a bit after a feed yesterday and a bit while feeding this morning (expressing on one side while she fed off the other, a bit tricky to do). I only got about 50ml in total I think. Decided to feed it to her as if she was going to flat out refuse I did not want to waste a lot of milk. She went for it immediately and guzzled the lot in about a minute. And then went straight on the boob.

She feeds for so long at the moment that I'm not sure I can face expressing regularly. Annoyingly I think the best time to do it would be at the 3am feed as the last few nights it's been really short and my boobs have still felt very full afterwards. The morning feed can sometimes last all morning so the thought of expressing then is not pleasant.

Hiya

Fx all well Muser, it must be horrid not knowing, will be checking in tomorrow!

Appologies for lack of posting, we seen to have hit a combination bad spot here - J still not sleeping, me getting increasingly knackered/desperate/depressed. We reckon it's a combination of several factors:
Reflux - he's always been quite a 'sicky' baby, but now it is combined with back archings and screaming and obviously a lot of pain. During the day he's frequently refusing food unless very relaxed and sleepy.
Growth spurt(?). Again. Feeding every 2 hours at night... Argh...
Constipation - connected to above 2 factors?
4 month sleep regression - apparently at about this age they are developing lots and processing it all at night time. So lots of waking. And screaming at night.

Teething - early but those little gum divots are unmistakable!

So he's shattered, I'm shattered, dd is shattered from being woken up at night, and dh has discovered (again) that he can't deal with little babies with nothing apparently wrong. And a frustrated stressed person-holding-baby does not a happy baby make, leaving muggins (literally) holding the baby.

Any advice VERY VERY welcome, have tried posting for advice in sleep and in feeding but little response.

Have been to the doctor who is concerned about sleep deprivation developing into proper dretful PND, I was probably more optimistic with her than I really feel but dread meds! We have however got infant gaviscon which should (eventually) help settle things down in the stomach regions. So that's a plus, also we've had 2 NORMOUS POOS as dd calls them today after nada for days. Perhaps i might get more than 2 hours sleep tonight? The past 4 nights have been a maximum of 3 hours total each night... I am a total mess.

On the positive, it's amazing watching him suddenly click this past week or so to grasping things and almost rolling over, and also to getting attention through grins and giggles. I almost like him again [wobbly brave smile emoticon]

I'm really sorry for the me me me mammoth essay-ing. You get to that world-contracty, brain-deady, help-help-help-me stage with so little sleep. Ah for that heady morning a few weeks ago when I'd had 6 hours and thought it was all cracked!

aw unbuffy sounds like yet again it's tough for you. sending a big hug your way.

not much i can say in the way of advice... have you tried the 'tiger in the tree' holding position for dealing with the tummy pain?
try to take it easy, doing only the necessary. but prioritise anything that gets you out of the house / a little sunshine / some exercise. and don't forget that looking after yourself is a necessity high up on the list.

take care. the good thing I guess is that the 4-months-sleep regression passes, so does teething.

I sound like a right misery i know, am not always glum but rely on you ladies for advice! The good times are easy to deal with so not really commented on...

unbuffy take it for granted that we all know how much you love ds and that you have happy times too! We're all the same don't worry.
I hope the gaviscon starts to have some effect, how long before you can tell? I guess the next step would be to see if he also has a lactose allergy? That was the case with one of my friends' babies and she was put on special formula until she was 2, then dairy was reintroduced gradually. She now eats anything. Are you going to start weaning him earlier too? You being stressed and tired might mean yur milk supplies are down a bit and it all becomes a vicious circle. Pester the hv and the gp if you think things aren't right- your instinct will rarely be wrong.
Heres wishing you a better night tonight xx

Unbuffy sorry you are having such a hard time of it, three hours sleep a night is tough. Sounds like you are doing an amazing job just keeping going and doing most of the hard work yourself. I don't have any useful advice as I am very new to all this but just wanted to give you a hug and also what coatracks said- we all know how much you love your LO and that there are good times too. I hope last night was a bit better for you all.
All ok here, although sick to the back teeth of my breast pump! Not sure how sustainable this is, will see this week when DP is back at work.
Hi to everyone else.

Big hug for Unbuffy. hope sunshine is helping. All I can say to try to help is 'this too shall pass'. You've done it before, you cando it now, perhaps just try to think of the light at the end of the tunnel? (my howlywail coping is to try to remind myself that he's never cried ALL night and it will stop and I will get some rest. I know it's incredibly tough though, I'm lucky to have loads of help with DS1... Though the night shift is and always will be just me. If your DH no good with howlywails, how is he with laundry and cleaning instead to give you less you have to do?

My pump got pressed back into action this morning. Woke up with oO and X wasn't hungry enough to help... Surprising how much more I can express in a lot less time now. No wonder feeds are getting quicker! Now I wonder if he'll take the bottle feed tonight and I can have a nice long relaxing bath??

Right, feed nearing the end and he's getting fussy. Waves to all and hoping all well for Muser

Unbuffy there's a reasonable chance we'd all get fed up of each other if we were constantly talking about how brilliant everything is! I'm sorry you're having a tough time, do go back to your GP if things don't get better and don't wait. There's nothing to be ashamed of in finding things tough, it's not an easy business motherhood. How was last night, any better?

Glad you're doing better dorcas.

I might just have found the motivation to express. Whilst I'm actually ok with being rather tied to her I realised this weekend that DH hasn't had sole responsibility for her for longer than an hour or so, and even then I'm basically in the house. This hit me when she started crying on Sunday as I was finally eating some breakfast at about 11.30. DH was reading the paper and I realised he was going to wait for me to go to her. No need for a MN YANBU thread about how terrible he is, he isn't he's wonderful, but I do think he needs to have her on his own for a while so that I'm not the automatic solution to all problems. So I might finally give it a go this week. Still not looking forward to it though.

It's sunny so I should head out but last night was the worst in ages so I'm considering a duvet day.

Finally, to spread a little cheer, I mastered the front wrap cross carry this weekend (after being shown) and got all excited about going for a walk. For the first time ever, including nighttimes, wee leaked out of her nappy and on to me... gross. I thought at first I was weirdly sweaty but no, I'd beeh wee-ed on. Oh the joys.

at tmt 'weirdly sweaty'

dh took J out in the sling for a walk yesterday (first time EVER just him+dogs+baby) so I got a quiet hour with dd which was v nice - think he might have realised it's not so hard after all, might actually be ggod for him too - he came back weirdly sweaty too but it WAS sweat i'm afraid!

Got a bit more sleep last night, bar dd havinga weird 'can't breathe' tight chest/throat episode at about 1 am - cue calpol and worried mummy - all perfickly normal this am.

Word for the day clearly weird.

And narcolepsy! Random dozing a-gogo.

Thank you for your kind words ladies. You're all so fab.
[ridiculously emotional emoticon]
(there SO should be one of those on here!)

How's it going?

T has started smiling- hurray!
Also feeding every 2 hours - hurroo!
(blackadder ref there...!)

Cooee anyone around?!

buffs how are you doing? Have things got any better?

toomt love the weirdly sweaty feeling!

dorcas loving that spellcheck changes my name to coatracks in your post- may namechange permanently!

I had my first night out last night, left dh with precious milk, but ds2 slept well and I had a lovely meal with the girls. Only slight downer was the realisation that I had absolutely nothing to wear...

v jealous of your night out Clare! Feel like I never leave the house... I know what you mean about nothing to wear mind!

Why does a tiny fraction more sleep leave you even more knckered?! [zombie emoticon] Can't even remember what time i last fed J...

Mornin all

Hello hello sorry not been around. Been feeling a bit overwhelmed.

Hoping everything is ok with MiniMuser. Wishing a brighter day to Buffs and am in awe of Clareanna for kicking up heels. Haven't even thought about expressing [clueless emoticon] so am another one permanently attached to baby. DH even brought him in to me the other evening when he started to cry and I was having a bath. Yeh thanks.

BIL in Sendai is ok, though things obv difficult. Short on food and water and only intermittent power. Still, very lucky though.

Off to check up on Lia surely it must be time for some more Totally Babies?

Huge wave to everyone xx

I read that as more knickered Buffs. Wondered if it had to do with hoiking up the infamous MN judgey pants. [doh]