November 2010: Welcome to life on the other side

[bunnygirl80]

Pull up a chair and help yourself to a LARGE glass of wine

Welcome to the dark side the wonderful world of motherhood

Hi all
Hope everyone is well? Can't believe we're all here with little fast growing babies.
Little one is now nearly 9 weeks old, growing fast and sleeping pretty good now.....will do 10ish till 5am! Weeks 3-7 were HARD!! Waking every 2-3 hrs for BF, have switched to bottles of expressed milk or formula at night so he doesn't have to be disturbed....just stick the bottle in his gob and he goes straight back to sleep.
Can anyone advise me how to meet other mums locally....I'm starting to feel pretty isolated :(
Live in the middle of nowhere.....O/H has been ill and can't help out, older teenage daughter being grotty....I'm coping, but some friendly mums in the same situ would be nice :)
During the day, baby too young to occupy himself, so needs to be held constantly....am finding it hard to get anything done...even a shower is impossible.
The weather isnt helping much...grim...cold...can't afford heating oil or the 6 week waiting list, so eking out the heating lol......gahhh! moan moan moan
Suggestions appreciated!!

hmmSleep dont think i was to show others, or a badly worded request if it was. Just sounded like they wanted to see us 'in action' but cant think why. My local clinic seem a bit weird generally so Im putting it down to this

Celestine Where are you? Have you tried the mumsnet local link? or looked for groups at your health clinic? My HV had a long list of what groups are on

Celestine Dare I suggest checking out the meet a mum sections on .....whispers....netmums? The local boards seem to have a lot of people trying to make friends. Your HV should be able to tell you about local baby groups.

I understand how hard it is to get things done with a clingy baby. I'm a bit meaner stricter with Abbie and occassionally she does have to go in her cot or bouncy chair whilst I shower or wash up or whatever. Mostly she's very good and waits patiently but sometimes she'll cry but sometimes I just have to get things done. Ds is very good at entertaining himself, thank goodness!

Comtessa How is your little ones bottom now? Abbie has had bad nappy rash for weeks and it's only finally cleared. She had antibiotics at 4wks for it and fucidin and hydrocortisone cream. I stopped using the hydrocortisone cream though as if you don't put it on really, really sparingly it makes the skin flare up. In the end I gave her plenty of bare bottom time and used sudocreme.

Fenouille I've heard the french are great for aftercare for Mums with the pelvic floors etc. I have to say I'm so bad at remembering to do my exercises and I'm not quite sure I'm doing them right.

I've not lost much weight through breast feeding but I'm a bit of a porker on the chocolate front so must employ a bit more will power! I can fit in to my pre pregnancy jeans though but would like to get into my pre Ds jeans!

Abbie is sleeping reasonably well and if I'm lucky she'll go 7hrs inbetween feeds at night. Ds didn't sleep through til 9mths!!! so I think she's doing brilliantly! She's feeding well but still very congested and coughing. Hopefully the germs will go soon.

Hello!

fen v about france's healthcare system in general but particularly the post natal services! Would like to have my next baby there but fear I am too fat and would just be told off by a freakishly elegant and beautiful doctor.

Now it's Jan the reality of moving out of London is becoming a scary reality. We're moving to colchester at end of march and dp is already getting interviews etc lined up. Don't know anyone there so need to start investigating ways to meet some new people I guess eeeeek!

Moving out of London also feels like giving up growing up.

Need to brave a mum and baby type group next week here too I think dp is back at work and need to rejoin society!

Any of us londoners up for a meet up in a few weeks? x

Hello all. Thanks for the meet-up link Smokey, have posted on the thread.

Thanks for advice, Anya's nappy rash is healing thanks to Sudocrem. Will also be giving her more frequent baths and nappy-free time afterwards.

Time for a quick sleep before Anya wakes up again.

PS Am thinking in investing in breast pump, Medela Swing electric seems to be highly recommended - any other recommendations?

Hello, thank you for all your replies. I think I will ask for a physio referral.

Smokeybacon Thanks, I'll definitely consider a postnatal de-brief. Not sure if I'm ready for it just yet, as it's so fresh in my mind but I think it will help me eventually understand what happened to me and why.

Fenouille, France sounds truly amazing!! Wow.

Comtessa - I'd never heard of tummy clinics, will see if there's one nearby.

Celestine - Do you have a library nearby that may have info on groups/ or run storytime etc? Good luck!

comtessa I don't know a thing about electric pumps but i have an Avent Isis and I love it. I think with any pump the trick is to use it a bunch so you get good at it...

Sorry for short post, am feeding Skye, and doing Lego with ds2&3 and on my phone! :). Skye is being an angel and sleeping through the night 11:30 to 7:30 at the moment which is such a blessing. Hoping she will keep it up for awhile. Her 6-8 week check is next week and I'm curious to see what she weighs because she sure is a chunk now and hasn't been weighed since she was 3 weeks old!

comtessa, I've got the Medela Swing electric and it is good, much better than the electric avent I had with my other two, although my nipples do seem to appear a bit bruised after I've used it sometimes! (not sore, just purple )

Very at all these great sleepers, Lottie is getting better by the day, last night she went a whole 4 hours between feeds, fingers crossed it keeps heading in the right direction.

Dh are going out tomorrow night for our anniversary, my parents are babysitting the 3 children so will be interesting to see how it goes, I'm off to express a bucket load of milk now to ensure milk supply isn't an issue at least.

Lainey, you've inspired me to post at last - have so far just been reading everyone's baby stories and telling myself I should add something soon, but never seem to get round to it! However, baby (DD, 1 month old) is with husband downstairs whilst I supposedly sleep, so thought I'd take advantage and drop you a line - I live in Colchester and wanted to say not to worry - although we're a hell of a lot smaller than London, there's lots to do and some brilliant baby centres so you'll find it really easy to meet up with other mums.
If you need a tour guide when you move here I'd be glad to help, and the NCT ladies I meet up with are always lovely and welcoming! Do you know whereabouts you're moving to yet? Do you have family locally or know the area at all?

As an update for anyone who is interested, our little family is doing fine, Jessica is kind of edging towards a fairly reliable 4 hourly pattern of feeding which is very workable, although still being useless and having her in bed with us rather than enforcing Moses basket or cot... Must be strong!

And finally... Does anyone else stare at the mountain of clothes your baby has been bought and spent a silly amount of time worrying that they'll have been bought in vain as the child will never actually have time to wear it all?!? Am mad, clearly! Night all xx

SGJ Yes!
Annabel has been bought/ given so much stuff and cos shes a big baby im already passing some of the newborn stuff on, unworn. I feel bad but I did tell people how much she weighed at birth (almost 9lb) so was a bit when people bought newborn things (usually up to 8lb) anyway.
Shes into 3-6 month things now and although im constantly saying to people to not buy stuff or buy 6m+ sizes we still seem to have enough for triplets

French health care is not all brilliant but the fact you're paying for a service does make it easier to shop around. But for instance two things I was pretty about when compared with UK is that you pay for your scans/tests/appointments/prescriptions/etc. up to 6 months pg and newborns only get 1 month free health cover after birth. So I'm already drowning in receipts from various doctors visits and pharmacies and have to do all the claiming back now I'll probably get about 90% of the cost back in the end.

Honestly, for pelvic floor exercises it's really worth paying to see a specialist because there are so many muscles down there I didn't know existed! My midwife sits there with her fingers up my whatsit telling me to pull up the ramp, close the sliding doors, suck some spaghetti The must important thing seems to be to consciously pull up your pelvic floor when picking up loads and while coughing or laughing to direct the force upwards rather than downwards.

Anyway....

I also worry about the clothes situation but we were given most of them second hand by generous friends and colleagues so I'm just putting them aside for regifting as I've got a few pregnant friends.

Hope the nappy rash is clearing up now comtessa and that any other ill babies are now on the mend.

Am managing to watch 'Finding Nemo' with DS1 while bf'ing DS2 and posting at same time (one-fingered)! Ha ha.
Surprised that you were asked to bf at 6 week, not heard of that before.

We're in week 7, he has managed the odd 4-5 hours sleep at night but more oftena bit less than that. DP cooked chilli prawns last night and I think it affected my reast milk as we had a more lively night, so will avoid anything very spicy for foreseeable.

Am tempted to mix BM with formula in eve as I feel pretty drained, haven't done yet, and managed not to with DS1. Just need to keep going.

Need to catch up properly but just wanted to ask KiwiKat are you the same Kiwikat that used to post on the July 2006 postnatal threads?

Happy New Year, everyone. Yes Wallace, I'm that very same Kiwikat - and I'm astounded you remember me. I hope for good reasons!

To bring my story up to date - I couldn't get a private appointment for dd any earlier than 6th Jan, which was two weeks away, so decided to go with that. However, things looked worse on Thursday 23 Dec, so I took her back into A&E, and this time saw a surgeon who seemed to know what she was talking about. It helped that she saw for herself what was happening. We went back the next day - Christmas Eve - for a dye enema, which showed nothing, but the senior surgeon also saw it happening for himself, and booked her in for an operation on New Year's Eve. A wait of one week was better than two, and on New Year's Eve she had a stoma, and the surgeon will operate to fix the fistula when she's a couple of months older, and is a bit bigger. We were in hospital for 5 looong days - nights of a comfort-sucking baby, kids in pain screaming/crying so no sleep - they kept us in so long as Monday was a Bank Holiday and the stoma nurses weren't in until Tuesday and they really wanted me to be well-instructed. The good news is that Little G is in fine form, pooing no longer gives her pain, and I am getting used to the whole thing. So glad I pushed for action on this! I talked to mums of other kids who'd had or have stomas and that really helped a lot, but I haven't been in the right headspace to post about it until now.

However, I'm now feeling less sleep-deprived, G is happier, I'm learning to live with the stoma, and would love to get together for a London meet-up if there's one being planned.

Hope you're all doing well, and your babies are happy and bonny.

kiwikat I'm so pleased your DD is getting sorted at last.

Was going to do a long post about the difficulties I've been having getting Will to go to sleep, but seem to have solved the issue by realising he can stay awake for 2 hours at a time. Seems he was objecting to being put down for a nap 30 mins before he was tired

Just need to figure out how to entertain him for his extra awake time now!!!

He's also dropped his 11pm feed, so now sleeps from 9pm to 2am wakes for 10 mins to feed and goes back down until 5:30 The first night he did it we'd been out and he'd had a bottle of EBM at 8pm, so I went from 5pm to 2 am witout feeding him....woke up with 2 watermelons down my top Ended up expressing to relieve the engorgement at 3am and got 300ml off in under 10 mins At least we've now got a stock of milk in the freezer

kiwi I'm very glad that your DD got through this first step on the way to getting better without any major problems. It must be very distressing for you but it's good that you managed to 'jump the queue' and get her seen more urgently. You seem to have been looked after very well too which must be a relief.

bunny I'm not sure how old Will is now, but Norry's now almost 10 weeks and has started enjoying his baby gym (things hanging off an arch). He's quite happy to try to bat at the toys for half-an-hour or so, so might be worth trying?

Hi all well Oliver is doing great on the sleeping he gets his last bottle at 9 and sleeps till 8.30 the nxt morning .Just hasd a row with the docs ,he will be 10 weeks on wed and still hasnt had his 6-8 wk assesment or his jabs.So i phoned complaining as the postman deliverd a letter postmarked the 7th,1,11 with my appointment card for his jabs which was on the 5th.So much shouting from me ive to go this wednesday to get them done.Hope everyone is healthy and not suffering with colds.

kiwi so pleased to hear about your dd, must be a relief for you all.

Mumcha - you have reminded me, must book post natal check this week. Really hope i have a good gp as still worried about all the bruising i am feeling and the fact that i feel less in control of my pelvic floor now than a few weeks ago. Really struggling to isolate the muscles to do my exercises

Finn is 6 weeks today and seems to have grown so much in the last week, think he was on a growth spurt as wanting to feed a lot more frequently and only having short naps in the day. Will take him to be weighed this week as must be pushing 11lbs by now

Have started a london meet up thread in case anyone is interested < hopeful>

london meet up

Fenouille Annabel's just starting to take an interest in the baby gym and other noise making toys now, so cute and nice to be able to 'play' with her

kiwi glad to hear you're making progress with your LO :)

Mibby I must admit I'm not very good at all this playing with baby stuff, but now he's burbling I'm enjoying having made up conversations with him :) The increasing interaction is rather nice.

Hehe I went shopping with Skye at 9pm the other night to get some groceries and was talking to her the whole way around, I got a few funny looks! Lol. I've always talked a lot to my babies though, it's supposed to be very good for their development...

sarah Did you have her in a sling as well? Probably most people couldn't even work out who you were talking to either! Did you get a lot of people sideling away from you? [imaging Sarah with wild hair and slightly mad look as this thread's resident mad woman]

Before Norry arrived a lot of people asked us what language we would speak to him in (DH isn't British). I used to reply it would be the same as we use to talk to our cats - DH German, me English. That used to get me a few but it's true - and in any case, who doesn't talk to their cats? [claims crown from Sarah as resident thread mad woman]

Fen We talk to the cats, thought everyone did? Maybe we're all slightly mad :)

LOL Fen Skye was in the sling half the time, when she was in the sling she was feeding too, so maybe I get double "mad" points for that! I talk to the dog and the cat, though I don't suppose it affects their intelligence much...lol!

Kiwi v glad things progressing for your DD.

(Surely cats are for talking to?)