October 2010 Arrivals Lounge

[SeaShellsOnTheSeaShore]

Welcome, check in is now open!

nymph apparently you don't need to cancel for a cold. However I would say its up to you. If she's snotty but otherwise ok, it might be fine to go with it. If she's feverish and crabby maybe not.

Thanks elsa. Think shes on the snotty but ok side at the moment. Just can't stand the thought of having to rearrange again

nymph ds really loves baby sign, I think its great as it combines lots of music and singing and play with the learning. I know he's a bit young for it really but I like any excuse to get out and do something! Its a free course through sure start but would have probably paid to do one otherwise

Ok, you lot will tell me if I'm being silly or not.

Basically still trying to sort out work stuff and I've been asking about a move that will put me literally down the road from home. I've been told that it's not likely. Now, we don't have family around us so we're going to be using childminder/nursery for DS. I do long shifts (ten hours plus) and I just feel that under the circumstances I need to be closer to home in case anything happens or I'm needed at short notice. I currently have a fifty minute commute to my normal office. It just feels that on balance to spend 12 hours plus away from a small baby is just a bit too much to ask. I'll have to work craptastic hours anyway, I know this.

I'm actually pretty angry, the woman who I spoke to said there were others before me and I would just have to do my time. My circumstances have changed pretty drastically and to be told that feels like a kick in the teeth. I actually know of people who have jumped that list for lesser reasons than mine.

Aside from an obvious desire to chuck a shovel at idiot woman, am I being silly?

What sort of hours does your dh do? Has he got a huge commute (ie is he more flexible in the short term?)

I did long hours an hours drive from home when Ds was 9mths and it was tough.

Oh...and your not being silly :)

He works nearer so its not that bad and his work is flexible. I just feel that it's unfair to place the lions share of responsibility on DH. I knew a family who were in a similar situation to what I will be in when I go back to work and the DH took on a lot of responsibility to care for the child and he was the one to take off of work a lot of the time due to the fact that he was nearer. His work did kick up a fuss with him.

I think knowing this, I don't want to place my DH in the position where his work feels that he's taking the mick so to speak.

That's understandable-but it works both ways. Even if you get a placement closet to home, if you are the first to leave work if nursey call or he is off ill, your work place gets pissed of with you instead.

Are you going back Ft or Pt?

Sounds like they are being as inflexible as they can be :(

Would a demotion (for re short term) get you a better placement?

Sorry, I'm on one about this today as I've been researching my option too today and got depressed and pissed off at the lot of the working parent (m or f). I just don't get how it works, and this is before we have school to consider!

Not being silly! It's hard going back to work. Other option would be for DS to go to work town nursery? Where does dh work?
If you do get a transfer would you then be across from me?

Hi All! Just marking my place (gosh you fall off these threads quickly if you don't keep up!). Will have a read now if I can while the wee man sleeps.... Hope everyone is well.
x

Seashells Me and DH are having discussions about that at the moment about what option would be financially best. I hate this, I really do. Also regarding a demotion, I am already at the bottom of the pile so not really an option.

Nymph Can't do work town nursery really as I wouldn't be able to guarantee finishing on time for pick ups. At least with home town nursery DH would be able to do pick ups/drop offs and yes I would be across from you.

Arghhhhh we'd also need another car as well !!

Oh hermya that sounds really stressful, I'm sorry they aren't being very supportive. Might there be ways to work the system, e.g. An appeals process or anything? Could you

I am worrying about childcare too, there just doesn't seem to be much available locally and I don't drive so ideally it would be local (dh sometimes works away or starts work very early). I don't want to send him somewhere unsatisfactory just because its the only option. I do a bit of freelance work (from home) too and I'm considering trying to build that up instead but worried as its for local authority that I could get hit in the next round of cuts. Am currently v envious of people with family nearby who can help out!

Hermya No it doesn't sound like you're being silly. It was very sensible of you to enquire about being closer to home. If I were you I'd put in a formal request asking for a formal response so they have to seriously consider your request. Giving a reason as they have looks silly on paper.

I've been offered a job in the location we were after (not guaranteed by any stretch of the imagination) but the snag is its not available until February so I've been asked to attend an 8 week residential course from the end of Oct-Dec then I'd have Xmas hols and a long handover/takeover. So I'm now thinking how on earth do I manage a course like that with DD. Although its residential, my friend lives nearby and, angel that she is she has said I can stay with her for the whole 8 weeks! I'd just need to find childcare. Its quite stressful thinking about it and I rather regret setting the ball rolling asking about it so early as even though its only January it feels like I'm snowballing back to work and I don't want to feel like that! I'm loving being off and if I could I'd leave now, but we'd be cleaving our salary exactly in half...not ideal.

More physio tomorrow morning for DD. She's really growing so her harness will probably need adjusting. Its funny to read of so many of you packing away the 0-3mth clothes. DD is still in her 0-3 month dresses, t-shirts and tights which she has to wear as sleepsuits and trousers don't fit her with the harness on. However, she had some time out of the harness the other day and the 0-3 mth sleepsuits are getting v.small. Like your DD Nymph, she's slim and tall, surprisingly so. She weighs just shy of 11lbs now and is looking very interested in what I'm eating!

I say funny because we're exactly the same!

Ooh and welcome back Dilly!

Hi Dilly :)

Elsa it's good you have to job on offer but I know what you mean re the course. Is it residential because of location or cos you'll be working in the evenings too? That makes a difference with dd? Will your dh be around either?

Hermya- ask on employment board if it's worth a formal request, flowery & ribena are v helpful

I emailed the union last night re my work problems as I'm getting v anxious about them. Dh is concerned I'm tipping into PND as apparently I'm doing some strange things.

He has his interview this afternoon!

Dd3 has had her jabs! Evil mummy evil daddy & evil ladies!! Ok so far though.

Evil mummy!! I hope she is ok :) we have hours next week.

Ok, please look at employment conundrum and tell me what you think!

Nymph-I hopethe union are useful, and really hope pnd is not rearing it's ugly head :(

Oh and Good Luck to your DH

Aw Hermya, that sucks. No good advice, I'm afraid, but I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

Good luck to nymph's DH. Probably had the interview by now - hope it went well.

No news here. Just checking in! :)

He seemed to have a good chat with the owner. When they've seen everyone some may have a trial. Might get some work out of it even if not that job. Sounds v informal but he got his change of career thing across well.

Dd3 feeling the jab affect/snot now. Had calpol then threw up 30 mins later so not sure how much got through. She's feeling a bit sorry for herself and sensitive. Had a good play in the bath but massage didn't go down well even avoiding the sore legs

Oh bless her Nymph lots of cuddles are the order of the day.

Its a residential course because there is homework and group syndicate work that they want you to do in the evenings, but I reckon if I'm ruthless enough I can exit stage left at 1700, just making sure I work during lunchtimes. Its 4.5 hours away from my home at the moment.

What strange things has your dH noticed you doing?

Poor dd nymph :( hope she feels better soon!

Elsa-the only problem would be your fellow group members and when they want to work. Sounds like it's great to have a friend to stay with etc.

It's tough isn't it? Big decisions....

Elsa-do you know the course& you'd 'get away' with that or can you speak to a leader of it ? That might make you feel better about it?

He says I'm doing obsessive stuff. Straightening everything in the bathroom before bed etc.