To not want to be a Muslim

[Lostagain]

Ok so I am a Muslim, have 2 dd and married dh is a convert to Islam....
Anyway from a young age I have had a strong pull towards Christianity or aspects of it. I don't believe Jesus is the son of god, but do believe he will return again etc.
Is it a cultural thing? I was born and brought up in the uk, went to a cofe school for a few years then we went to a inner city which was full of Asians- I am Asian but it was horrible, I hated it. Despite this I still sang on the school choir, certain people were horrified at the time, but my mum supported me. In my teens i went a bit religion mad and started wearing a headscarf etc- didn't last long,
i love Christmas and Easter, I sing hymms when I'm washing up i've been to a few church's in my time, funerals weddings etc and to be honest it's so peaceful there.
I have been to mosques it was ok,actually I couldn't wait to get out of there....Maybe it's a language barrier
I haven't spoken to anyone about this as it is such a big thing -changed my name on mn but sometimes I just don't want to be a Muslim. I want to bring up my children with faith and I struggle to explain the Muslim faith.

I'm sure there is the odd sentence in the above which makes sense :)

will continue later inshaallah am off to do shopping x

nailak, I think are being naive not having your marriage registered at a registry office. If your husband was to die then you would not inherit anything unless he has made a will. Also legally you would not be considered your husband's next of kin. Do you want to be the person involved in making the decision whether the life support is turned off if (God forbid) your husband was in a car accident.

I am surprised that mosque can not do the civil part of marriage like churches do. Especially when you consider you are legally allowed to get married in all kinds of places like hotels, Zoos or on top of a mountain.

I am not Muslim, or religious at all, but I studied Islam at a level and was pleasantly surprised as to how lovely a religion is and how peaceful it's message is. The more negative reputation is often due to cultural and no religious influence, for instance the qu'ran teaches equality for women and diesn't say they should cover up. Also some of it makes sense, gambling and alcohol and lending money and charging interest are damaging so it makes sense they are frowned upon. Maybe do some reading about the life of Mohammad and early Islam? I know many people who were born Muslim but don't know much about Islam. Perhaps you may find in it some of the things that draw you to Christianity. Maybe you could teach and instill in your children the positive aspects of islam?If you don't find the answers this way, then you should follow your heart and be whoever you want to be. Good luck op.

There is nothing to inherit, maybe debts, that is it. My husband hasn't even got a bank account he gets paid in to mine.

As for the life support thing, life and death is in the hands of Allah.

I didn't get married in a Masjid I got married in my in-laws house by imam.

mustget my Dh is like yours he knows that he won't be able to cope at the moment with two wives. But I disagree about the stigma about.divorcees. many families wouldn't consider divorcees or women with children. And there are lots of muslim women divorcees around the world, suffering because of famine and war. If the opportunity came for my husband to marry one of them, depending on situation at that time I might encourage him to. Because I want for my sister what I want for myself, and if I was in that situation with no prospects to work or provide for my family, I would expect and want the muslim ummah to care about my life and my honour and my dignity.

I would be prepared to go through a little hardship to help a person in need.

realhouse I think you will find the majority of Muslims and the consensus of.scholars is that it is part of Islam for.women to cover.

"if I was in that situation with no prospects to work or provide for my family, I would expect and want the muslim ummah to care about my life and my honour and my dignity. "

In the UK women can and do work. We also have a benefits system to act as a safety net.

"I would be prepared to go through a little hardship to help a person in need."

You would honestly be happy with your husband having sex with another woman? Surely there are ways of helping a person in need without actually marrying them. I feel that marrying for charity rather than love is a bit degrading to the woman.

If u only have a nikka, aren't you in the uk classed as an unmarried mum?

Well our kids birth certificates say married. No one has ever challenged it. When we asked tax credits what box to tick they said if you consider yourself married tick married. On all forms etc I tick married which is usually the same box as living with partner.

I don't see it as charity. I see it as marrying for the love of the ummah. As you know in Islam love between spouses comes romantically after marriage but we love each other firstly for the sake of Allah. So there will be love between the husband and wife at time of marriage. Marriage is a way of pleasing Allah.

And obviously marriage is a relationship, not one person giving and the other taking so it is not really charity.

If you ready my post it was in reference to those from war torn and famine struck countries. Not those in UK. How did you miss that?

Also asylum seekers can not work.

I would be happy that the other sister had a loving caring husband to share her life with. To me that is more important. I believe halal and allowed what Allah has allowed.

OP, why is christianty really so appealing to you? If you look at the church of England's history, it is far removed from the original doctrine of Jesus. There are so many holes in it it's version of history and jesus as god/son of god etc etc.

cote good to see that if you were to choose a religion, islam would be it!
so despite all your reservations, you also see the beauty of the Quran. :)

Galvanise

I don't know, I just feel a pull towards Christianity, it's difficult for me to explain

Maybe it my own culture that's need changing, I feel at peace in a church- not a mosque etc

OP,

Have you been to a proper mosque other than the one you mentioned earlier?

Have you been to one where there are parties, socialising, Q&A sessions, children's activities - and all those things are run by women?

To me it sounds - forgive me for saying- that you have a certain issue, but you are looking for the wrong solution.

Different mosques are different, same as different churches. A evangelist church is different from orthodox mosques are the same.

Also, what is is about christianity that pulls you?

I am respectfully asking you the questions below.

DO you realise the basis of christianity as known today are completely at odds with islam.

By that, i mean jesus is believed to be god. Some believe him to be son of god. In christianity, there is no concept of jesus as a messenger of God. He either is God or the son of God.
Others believe that God created man in the image of himself. Others believe in the concept of trinity (which i still cannot explain cos i dont understand it).

Yes, many aspects of christianity are lovely, but so are many other things.

If you dont have a grasp or belief in the basics, then whatever else you do, whichever religion you like or dislike, you truly cannot understand religion if you dont start from the basics. It is just like carrying out rituals without knowing why - it doesnt matter whether that includes visiting churches or visitng mosques.

Sorry, if i have caused offence, that is not my intention.

crescent i agree.

Islam is essentially about purification of the soul. God wants to see that your soul seeks the truth, is health healthy, moral and in a happy state! :)

Galvanise, you don't cause me offence, as I have said in previous posts maybe I need to go back to basics on both faiths and choose. As now I don't believe I was ever bought up as a true Muslim, as most of it seems to be what culture has taught and what some scholars have taught.

There are no mosques in the area that I live in. So no I haven't been to any activities run by women. Women run the activities at the local church.

What I do believe is that there is only one god and he created certain people to pass the message of peace, love, hope and forgiveness.

Jesus the son of god, a little unsure we are all gods creation? god decides when we are born, when we die. God chose all the prophets to pass on the message?

The spirit I believe is the angle Gabrielle.

But I still have questions why did god send Jesus first? And muhammed last? Isn't it the same message in essense? But in a different language?

I know I must sound like some deluded person, but this is how I feel.

I really do feel peace in a church, sat on my own in quite reflection thinking of god. When I sit in a mosque on my own in quite reflection I think of all the jobs that need doing and when can I go home.

op,

Thank you for not taking offence at my post.

you are right. (from an islamic point of view)

There is only one God and he did indeed create certain people to pass on the message of peace, love, hope and forgiveness. Jesus was sent before muhammed (but after moses) to correct the wrongs that people had fallen into. Jesus was amazing in the miracles he showed people and this was to give the essential message that he is indeed a messenger of God and that people must turn back to God. People then over the years started falling into the wrongs that jesus had come to correct - a major wrong being that they started calling jesus god or the son of god. Remember, jesus was a jew. Jesus would never have said that he is god or the son of god.

What sets muhammed apart? Muhammed was a message for the entire humanity of how to live a moral life from birth to death. His message was fundamentally the same as Jesus in that he told of the oneness of God. His message then went further and showed people how to live a pious and virtuous life.

I am confused when you say you are 'unsure we are all god's creation'. What do you mean?

Sorry

Just meant people believe Jesus is the son of god-he was created by god, but aren't we all created by god?

Not only to do with Muslims. Christianity has its fair share of guilt and shame. Not just religion either. Societies use feelings of guilt and shame to reduce anti social behaviours. It is abuse of this that is wrong. People feeling guilty or ashamed of things that there is no rational reason for them to feel that way about. However it is for a society to find a consensus on what should or shouldn't be shameful. That probably needs a discussion on morals and ethics which in the past have been guided by religions. While some things still apply there are others which many think do not.

So shame isn't only related to Islam.

The point is in Islam the rights, needs and protection of society is given more importance then the freedom of an individual.